See Me After Class Part 2

9.

The Due-Date Blues: When High Expectations Meet Low MotivationNothing looks better on paper than the advice "Set high expectations for your students." Politicians, in-service presenters, and countless books with apples on their covers insist that students will rise to meet the standards we set. Most rookies already know high expectations are important. Few are prepared for the low skill levels standing in the way or for the advanced strategies kids use to avoid hard work.Picture this: You spend hours designing a creative project that appeals to a variety of learning styles. You mention it every period and give students plenty of cla.s.s time to work on it. You even stay during lunch and after school in case anyone comes by for help.On the due date, you feel like someone has punched you in the stomach. Only six kids turn in projects. Of the six, three are in 29-point type, filled with obvious spelling mistakes and only loosely connected to the directions. One is half-typed and half-handwritten because the student "tried to finish during lunch" but "had to eat." One-third of your cla.s.s is absent, and five students are at your desk telling you their printers ran out of ink. Three hand you notes from their "parents." The rest give you their best impression of being so, so sorry because they "totally forgot," but you notice everyone starting to get that look in their eyes that says, "Hey! No one did it! We're not the only losers in here!" You fight the urge to grab the cla.s.s in a group choke hold and clap their heads together like cymbals. Welcome to the due-date blues.Symptoms of the Due-Date BluesSigns you may be infected with due-date blues include violent feelings, a general sense of hopelessness, and nagging questions such as the following: - [image]After I design an a.s.signment that pushes kids' limits, how do I get them to do it?

- [image]Do I have to grade on a curve to reward the few kids who made the effort? What if their work sucks?

- [image]Do I refuse late work to teach responsibility, or accept it so I have something to put in my grade book?

- [image]How do I motivate kids to achieve great things when so many of them are satisfied with just pa.s.sing?

- [image]How do I punish the kids who don't even come to cla.s.s on the due date?

- [image]I want to motivate my kids using positive reinforcement and goal setting, but it doesn't seem to be working. Is it okay to scare kids into learning? (By the way, how do do I scare kids into learning?) I scare kids into learning?) Treating the Due-Date BluesSome teachers will tell you to forget about a.s.signing homework or big projects because students won't do them anyway. Comments like these reflect years of frustration, and there is often some truth to them. At the same time, most successful people have had to sweat to meet deadlines-chances are your own school career included an all-nighter or two. You owe it to students to a.s.sign projects that push their limits. You owe them clear directions, and help if necessary. Then, you owe it to yourself to make students feel just as miserable as you do if they don't bother to try.If a few students did the a.s.signment, avoid going crazy on the whole cla.s.s. Kids feel relieved, not ashamed, when they are part of a large group in trouble together. Instead, praise the work you received. Find a group reward for those who did it. Then, find a consequence that makes each student feel alone in the decision to fail. Here are a few of your treatment options: - [image]Bring treats on the due date. Let those who did the a.s.signment eat candy or snacks in front of those who didn't.

- [image]Think about whether quality is a battle you want to fight right now. If it is, hand back unacceptable work and give students one more day to improve it. If not, don't mention quality until grading time.

- [image]Consider what percentage of students did the work. If more than half did it, give the unprepared students a long, silent a.s.signment while other kids talk-I mean "peer edit." If only a few students did the work, write them a pa.s.s to the library or send them to another room while you conduct essay-writing boot camp for everyone else. The justification for this is that these students already learned what they were supposed to. Now they can afford some free time.

- [image]Review your policy for late work. If you told kids you don't take late work, you have every right to stand by your word. In some cases, though, you may feel the chance of pulling in a few extra a.s.signments is worth a (totally inconsistent) change in policy. If you do decide to backtrack, show consideration for kids who met the deadline by giving them extra credit or knocking grades off late work.

- [image]Make students write their own failure notices while you dictate. This is a productive outlet for your anger since you're giving the lecture you would have given anyway. Writing down your comments means students have to listen. Even better, they're looking at their desks instead of staring at you or smirking at their friends while you talk. If you include all relevant details, these letters also make great doc.u.mentation at report card time. A typical letter might sound something like this:Today was the due date of a major project. I had more than a month to complete this project, and it was worth four grades. This a.s.signment was a way to prepare me to be a successful adult with the skills needed to hold a job I will enjoy. I knew from the day it was a.s.signed that it would be difficult, if not impossible, for me to pa.s.s this cla.s.s without completing this project. My teacher was available to help me during lunch every day this week in case I had any problems. Computers are available in the school library, which closes at 8:00 p.m. I understand that being successful in life involves meeting deadlines and doing things I don't always feel like doing. My success or failure in life is my responsibility. I chose failure over hard work on this project.

- [image]Continue as needed until your violent urges pa.s.s. Give students a chance to add their own comments before signing. Then file the papers or send a copy home.

Preventing Future Outbreaks of Due-Date BluesWhen the due-date blues. .h.i.t, your first instinct is to blame yourself. Was the a.s.signment understandable? Were directions clear? Did you give enough reminders? It's important to consider these questions, but the due date of a major project is no time to show self-doubt. Students must learn it's their responsibility to get work done by a deadline and get help if they need it. The reality is that some students chose to skip the project on the day you a.s.signed it, and showing insecurity sends the message they made the right choice. That said, there are are some changes that might improve your numbers next time: some changes that might improve your numbers next time: - [image]Make it compet.i.tive. Post turn-in percentages for each cla.s.s or group. Bring a treat for the winners and leave numbers up until the next major due date.

- [image]Be as clear as possible. Provide typed, numbered directions for all projects. Then review in cla.s.s to make sure every step is clear. Asking, "Any questions?" isn't enough. Make kids explain instructions in their own words.

- [image]Be available to help. Let students know where and when they can find you if they're stuck. Give homework related to the larger project. This will help students keep up and give them a chance to fix misunderstandings before the last minute.

- [image]Hold kids accountable. Make students sign contracts that they know what the a.s.signment is, when it is due, and how to get help if they need it. Keep these in their record files.

- [image]Count down to the due date. Write project due dates on the board and leave them up. Mention them every day. Post a daily countdown. If students have a.s.signment planners, make them number backward from the final deadline and keep track of how much time they have left.

- [image]Monitor progress. Have kids fill out sheets once a week stating what they've accomplished so far and what they plan to do over the weekend. This also teaches them planning skills and reminds them large projects are not meant to be done overnight.

- [image]Break it into pieces. Have a rough-draft due date, an outline due date, a due date for notes, et cetera. The more separate deadlines involved, the higher your numbers will be for the final draft. If you plan to contact parents when kids don't turn in a project, call on the earlier due dates. That way, when they ask, "Is there anything he can do about it?" the answer will still be yes.

Designing Foolproof(er) a.s.signmentsAfter dealing with the quant.i.ty of work you didn't get, it's time to face the quality of work you got. Prepare for more pain. Students are great at doing the easy or creative parts of a.s.signments, then skipping requirements that test real knowledge. I'd live pretty comfortably if I had a dollar for every horribly written essay printed on decorative paper. If I got paid for obvious plagiarism, I could certainly afford to quit teaching. It's hard to plug every loophole students use to escape from learning. However, teachers can take various steps to make directions clearer and force students to work at the top of their ability: - [image]Distribute rubrics or checklists for all major a.s.signments. Rubrics should describe what skills you're grading for and how many points each category is worth. You may want to include categories for neatness, completion, and effort.

- [image]Review directions early and often. Give a quiz or play a game based on directions. Draw connections between daily activities and long-term projects. On your rough-draft due date, students should spot-check each other's work using the checklist you've provided.

- [image]Make students predict their own grades. Students should staple checklists to the front of their work and use them to estimate their grades. If a student hands in work with no checklist, or didn't estimate his grade, you can be fairly sure he didn't read the directions-which say students lose ten points automatically if they don't estimate their own grades.

- [image]Discuss plagiarism. Make sure students recognize cheating in all its forms. Then discuss how seriously you and other teachers take it. Plagiarism causes students to flunk college cla.s.ses and destroys the careers of adults. All universities and even some high schools subscribe to services like Turnitin.com, which checks student work against every piece of printed material on the Internet. Ask if your school subscribes, but also give a.s.signments that are difficult to copy and paste from a website. The days of two-page biographies are over.

Why the Due-Date Blues Make Teachers So SickWhen students skip a.s.signments, it shows more than a casual att.i.tude toward failure. It shows they missed the whole point of what we're doing here. Teachers don't really need eye-catching poster boards explaining the scientific method. If we did, we could easily have made them ourselves. We demand quality work because we want kids to know how to create quality. We teach kids good behavior hoping they will become good people. Our real goal is for students to absorb values that will turn them into happy, honest, successful people, one eye-catching poster board at a time.Ten Principles of Successful Living We All Hope Students Learn from Us 1. Be where you're supposed to he, on time and prepared.

2. Follow all steps of directions.

3. Think for yourself, and do the right thing even when no one's watching.

4. Think about the future and how your present actions affect it.

5. Take responsibility for your decisions.

6. Search for solutions instead of complaining about problems.

7. Show respect and expect respect back.

8. Present yourself as an intelligent person.

9. Produce a finished product that won't need any explaining.

10. Put more into the world than you take out.

10.

No Child Left ...

Yeah, Yeah, You Know: Different Types of Students and What Each Type Needs from YouIn teacher movies, the real problem is always motivation. Behavior issues fade as the teacher finds a way to get through to students, and they take off like grateful, street-smart rockets. Real-life teachers find that, while motivation is an issue for many kids, others try hard without success. Students who understand effortlessly maybe rude to struggling cla.s.smates, while others disrupt because they are struggling themselves. Some kids have no discipline at home. Some have too much. Some are switching schools next week. The resulting combination is much harder to push toward a happy ending.If the movies are right about one thing though, it's this: the heart of teaching is forming relationships with students as we move them from point A to point B. Sometimes, the bonds form as we push children toward their goals. Other times, we have to earn some credibility before they trust us to lead the way.Teachers care about kids. It's what we do. At the same time, students are people, and we don't get along equally with all people. Deep down, many of us had a specific type of child in mind when we chose this career. Maybe we're drawn to kids who remind us of younger versions of ourselves. Other times, it's the thug with the neck tattoo who shows his soft side during our poetry unit, the struggling sweetheart whose eyes light up when she gets the answer, the smart kid who's never felt challenged. Then there's the honor-roll superstar who finishes her work early and loves to help us with ours. We may not always trust her intentions, but we sure do appreciate her positive att.i.tude and all that help.On the other hand, we sometimes have kids we don't like: bullies, eye-rollers, girls who look like younger versions of our ex's new girlfriend, et cetera. We know we shouldn't have favorites, but certain kids make our day, while others just make our day harder. Part of our job is figuring out how to build relationships with the kids in our cla.s.srooms, even those who frustrate us. In the end, they all need to get from point A to point B, and we're in charge of the transportation.Low-Performing KidsWhy They Break Your HeartYou will quickly realize point A is not the same for every child. Working with some students feels like trying to build a sand castle where the waves. .h.i.t the sh.o.r.e. Your explanations and extra help are never enough. Progress seems to wash away without a trace. The saddest part is that these students follow all the rules you've invented to guard against careless mistakes. These students are not careless, though. They do all the test-taking strategies, copy all the notes. They make mistakes because they just don't get it. How do you make life fair for students who do everything you ask of them and still don't come out on top?"There was a girl in my math cla.s.s who would raise her hand after every explanation and say 'I ... don't ... get it.' Every day several times a day I would see that hand in the air and this pained look on her face. My stomach muscles would tighten because I knew what she was going to say. She was such a nice girl, but I dreaded calling on her because I couldn't figure out how to make her understand."What They Need from YouPatienceSuccessful or not, we all have at least one thing we do terribly. Personally, I'd be lost if I had to fix my own car, and I can't sing-not even "Happy Birthday." These, of course, are only the weaknesses I'm willing to share in print. Luckily for me, I can avoid doing these things in public or under pressure, and admitting our shortcomings is easy when they don't impact our lives. Struggling students, on the other hand, constantly hear that school success is the key to their future. To put ourselves in their shoes, we need to picture our own weaknesses under the same microscope.Solid, Concrete Tricks That Work Every TimeHigher-order thinking skills have their time and place, but students need to understand concepts at a basic level before they can build models of them, write poems about them, or use them in word problems. Listen to parents helping kids with homework and you'll still hear some of the mnemonic devices they learned in school for remembering planets, order of operations, colors of the rainbow, and so on. These things work. Borrow them from other teachers, or challenge your own students to create memory-friendly phrases.Recognition When They Get It RightPa.s.sing a spelling test for the first time doesn't make someone an A student, but your struggling speller doesn't need a reminder of that. Jump up and down. Take a picture. Give him a thousand stickers. He pa.s.sed his first spelling test! Low-performing kids work hard for those small victories. They need to know that you know it's a big deal.The "Growth Mindset"In her book Mindset Mindset, psychology professor Carol Dweck shows that people are more successful when they believe ability grows with effort. Instead of complimenting kids by saying they are smart, praise them by saying they worked hard and their efforts paid off. This att.i.tude helps all students, not just low achievers. Students try harder when they know their current report card is not their destiny.Why Giving Them Your Attention Is Worth It"One day while we were working on subtraction, I noticed my student kept counting problems on her fingers and ending up one number off. I showed her a trick I learned when I was in school: write the smaller number on a piece of paper, then draw dots as you count up to the higher number. The number of dots is always the correct answer because writing the original number keeps students from counting the starting point. The next day the girl came in early and told me, 'Guess what, Miss? I get subtraction!' I gave her a few problems and she got them all right. It was a huge boost to her confidence ... and mine."Unmotivated KidsWhy They Will Frustrate YouIf you need any more proof that life is unfair, move your focus to that bored-looking kid rolling his eyes in the corner. He does nothing unless you come over and place the pencil between his fingers, yet he can knock out a decent paper the night before it's due. Unlike your struggling students, this kid would love for you to think he's hopelessly stupid. Then you would let him get away with staring at the wall all day and occasionally turning in sloppy 12-line essays. This kid may not be a genius, but he could clearly be doing better with the tiniest effort. The problem is you can't get him to put in the tiniest effort.You better figure it out soon, because if you have to say the word potential potential one more time ... one more time ..."I had this student my first year who drove me crazy. This student did not care about getting work done or being in school, and he was rude about it. He would come in late every day, sit at his desk, and do nothing, but every now and then he'd call out the correct answer to a question without raising his hand. He did this just enough to let me know he could do the work if he felt like it, which made his lack of effort seem even more like a slap in the face. My second year I got this student again because he did not pa.s.s to the next grade. I about died when I saw his name on my roster."What They Need from YouImpatienceIf you know they can do it, and they know they can do it, and they know you know they can do it, stop telling them you know they can do it and make them do it. Then, if it's not done right, make them redo it. Get upset. Raise your voice. Call home with your concerns. Some kids only get lazier when they have a blank check of encouragement. Let them know that they're not as impressive as they think they are and that they still have plenty to prove.RelevanceI won't insult you by saying, "Well, maybe you should plan lessons around students' interests to get them more involved!" Chances are, you've been trying to do that since day one and this kid is still drawing pictures on his quizzes. However, if a student is clearly capable of more than he is achieving, it can't hurt to ask a few questions. Offer an alternate a.s.signment or talk with him privately about how to catch his attention. If all you get is an irritated shrug, at least you know you you made some effort. made some effort.Compet.i.tionKids who won't work for their own benefit may do it to help their cla.s.ses win a contest or beat another group in a game. In the end, it doesn't matter why they do it as long as they do it.A Reality CheckIf a student refuses to work despite your best efforts, let him fail. Life doesn't give grades based on potential. Neither should you.Why Giving Them Your Attention Is Still Worth It"There have been so many difficult students it's hard to know where to begin, but I'll start with a student I had 15 years ago in my second year of teaching. He rarely did his work in cla.s.s, but he wasn't stupid-just indifferent to education. What he did care about was socializing ... all day, every day. He drove me crazy with his nonstop talking. After a particularly bad day, I wrote a referral and followed up with his counselor. It turned out he already had 167 referrals in the system! It seemed he was immune to them. I stopped writing him up, but I did stay on his case throughout the school year. Eventually, he dropped out. I didn't think much more about him until he came back to visit a few years later. He told me he had gotten his GET). Then he went to a trade school, got a good job, and was making a nice life for himself. He said he was sorry he had been a disruption in my cla.s.s. He also wanted me to know he appreciated my efforts to teach him. He knew I tried hard, even if I was somewhat unsuccessful. The lesson I learned from this was that students continue to grow up after they leave us. Sometimes we get them when they are just too young and immature to perform well in the cla.s.sroom."Shy KidsWhy You Will Worry About ThemAccording to questionable statistics on several websites, public speaking is the number-one fear of Americans. Death is number two. If this is true, it means some of our students would rather die than speak up in front of their cla.s.smates. They'd certainly rather get the wrong answer on their homework."My cla.s.s emphasized partic.i.p.ation and performances. I was proud that the loud kids got involved in the activities instead of disrupting the cla.s.s. It wasn't until the end of the year I realized some of my quieter students had low grades. One young man in particular never said a word the whole year and didn't turn in any work-I kept getting mad at him and calling him out in public because I thought he was lazy but his other teachers told me he was a decent student. I never figured out how to get him to do anything and he ended up failing the cla.s.s. Maybe there was nothing I could have done for this student, but I wish I had provided him and my other shy kids an opportunity to shine."What They Need from YouThe Spotlight off ThemIt is possible to get trapped in silence. If you've ever been the quiet one in a group, you know as soon as someone says, "Hey! How come you're not saying anything?" you are locked out of the conversation for good. There's not a chance you will open your mouth with the added pressure of making up for your silence. Keep this in mind, and think twice before you innocently point the cla.s.s's attention toward a kid who "hasn't had a chance to partic.i.p.ate yet."Other Lines of CommunicationTeachers, by definition, have overcome our shyness at least enough to speak in front of students. That's not to say we can't relate to our shy kids. It just means we need to be extra careful when interpreting their silence. It's a mistake to a.s.sume quiet students have nothing to say, but equally wrong to a.s.sume they understand everything. One solution is to pa.s.s out index cards and make all students write a question or comment. You can also a.s.sign a one-page "letter to the teacher" or ask kids to put stars on journal entries they'd like you to read. Quiet students can take advantage of these opportunities if they want you to know them better.A Reason to Come Out of Their Sh.e.l.lsPart of our job is to get students past their limitations. At some point during the year, you should expect even your shyest students to say something something. The first time is always the hardest, so consider bending the rules: let them present with a friend, read from note cards, or perform sitting down. When they finally speak up, make sure you congratulate them ... privately.Why Giving Them Your Attention Is So Worth It"We were having an in-cla.s.s poetry slam and most of the kids did a great job, except for one girl. She was super-shy and refused to perform. I offered the whole cla.s.s extra credit if they could get everyone to partic.i.p.ate, and a bunch of kids rushed over to encourage her. At first I felt bad about putting her on the spot, but this cla.s.s was full of nice kids who were very supportive. Finally, she realized she was going to get attention either way, so she stood up and read a poem. She got a ton of applause, and she looked so happy it made my day. As the year went on she became less shy, and the following year I saw her yelling in the hallway. I couldn't believe it was the same girl."Manipulative KidsWhy They Will Infuriate YouStudents who make up dead family members or switch cla.s.ses for an easier grade will irritate you. Kids who excuse 40 absences and then come in with makeup work on "report card eve" will make you want to whip ninja stars into their foreheads. Students who cheat the system also insult your intelligence and waste your time. After all, you're the one who has to grade that sloppy makeup work in time for report cards or pa.s.s that lazy student whose last five schools "lost" his transcripts."didn't know how much paperwork was involved in failing seniors. Teachers had to start a paper trail at least two months before graduation or the computer a.s.signed a pa.s.sing grade. One of my students knew this, and she stopped coming to cla.s.s as soon as the deadline pa.s.sed. By the time her grade dropped to an F, it was too late to do anything. She graduated with a C after skipping cla.s.s for two months and even spread the word to my other students. Attendance was terrible the last three weeks of school." pa.s.sed. By the time her grade dropped to an F, it was too late to do anything. She graduated with a C after skipping cla.s.s for two months and even spread the word to my other students. Attendance was terrible the last three weeks of school."What They Need from YouFirm Answers from the BeginningExcept in the most extreme cases, start the year right by showing confidence in your grading system. Don't let kids talk you into changing grades. Don't let parents talk you into changing grades. Standing behind your decisions now will save lots of explaining later.A Paper TrailMake students sign for failure notices or excessive absences. Contact their parents and write it down. The more doc.u.mentation you have, the better prepared you'll be to answer parents who "had no idea" their children were doing poorly.A Sharp Eye for InconsistenciesIf you suspect a student is scamming you, react carefully and slowly. Talk to his other teachers. Ask counselors to pull records. Listen to your gut feeling when something doesn't seem right, but do your homework before making accusations.A Wakeup Call That Sometimes You Can't Give ThemIf a student gets a free grade on a technicality or you lose a paperwork battle, do everything in your power to fix it. If you can't, take a deep breath and let it go. You learned your lesson and you'll apply it with next year's cla.s.s. They'll learn their own lesson when the time is right. Now go enjoy your summer.Why You Shouldn't Let Them Make You Hate Your Job"One student that was a real pain was the student government president. I had her in a calculus cla.s.s, so one might a.s.sume she was a decent student, but no. She was rude, lazy, manipulative, and downright ornery. She didn't study, didn't do homework, and generally thought I was going to give her a pa.s.sing grade because it was her. I gave her a failure notice midway through the fourth nine weeks and told her to have a parent sign it. Of course, I made a copy with her signature. She never brought back the note, and she accused me of disrespectful language toward her. At the end of the year she got her report card and sure enough, she had an F. Her mother called the school and demanded a conference in the princ.i.p.al's office. She accused me of keeping her daughter out of law school. This girl hadn't even spent one day in college, but she was already using me as her excuse for not getting into law school! The good news was I had done my job correctly. The princ.i.p.al backed me to the hilt. He refused to be bullied by the parent, and the failing grade stood. I didn't say it out loud, but if I was responsible for keeping that girl out of law school, I deserved a pat on the back."Bad KidsWhy You Will Sometimes Hate ThemYes, I know. No kid is really "bad," and it's wrong to label kids. Unfortunately, right now you can't think of any other word to describe [insert name here]. Actually, you can think of lots of words .... But let's just move on to the rest of the chapter."I had one student who dominated my cla.s.s. I had failed from square one in that I never set clear boundaries for his behavior. About two weeks into the year, he began ... little by little ... to get rowdier. Every time I reprimanded him, I never knew whether he was going to blow me off and put his head down or get mad and cuss at me in front of the cla.s.s. He repeatedly said disrespectful things to his cla.s.smates, especially the girls. He constantly got off task, and he was failing the course content abysmally! I kept trying to recognize his improvement when he behaved well, but he always went back to his old ways. One day a girl asked him an innocent question-something like 'Why were you late?' He cursed her out and tried to kick her. I was dismayed. He was the first student I ever wrote up. He spent most of the rest of that year serving in-school suspension for repeated behavioral offenses in multiple cla.s.ses."What They Need from YouMore AttentionTeachers are often encouraged to use positive reinforcement with troublemakers, praising them for sample-sized portions of good behavior. If you're like me, you find this mildly offensive. These kids already waste more than their share of your energy and cla.s.s time. Now you have to treat them like superheroes for not pushing in line? If a child's disruptions are clearly cries for attention, though, you may be able to provide this in other ways: make him responsible for a cla.s.s job, offer after-school tutoring, or pa.s.s by his desk frequently to check his work. If all else fails, swallow your pride and compliment him for not setting things on fire.Less AttentionSometimes no amount of attention is enough to keep a troublemaker from ruining your day, year, or general mental health. If you sense this is the case, take a step in the opposite direction. Start by moving her seat to a corner where she's less likely to disturb the cla.s.s. If necessary, turn her desk toward the wall. Do your best to ignore misbehavior that is simply irritating. You may find she calms down when she doesn't get the reaction she's hoping for.Genuine ConcernTroublemakers often feel like teachers care less about them than the distractions they create. Sometimes they're right. When every bit of your feedback relates to a child's behavior, break that cycle by turning to a new subject. If you are so fed up that saying something nice would feel fake, force out a neutral comment, like "Zip your jacket so you don't get sick." Kids who feel you like them in spite of their actions may eventually begin to act in a way you like.Accountability for Their BehaviorIt's tempting to create a double standard for an offender who just won't quit, but it's not recommended. Letting bad conduct slide paves the way for worse and shows the rest of your cla.s.s that testing the rules pays off. It's also a disservice to the troublemakers themselves. Part of your job as a teacher is to help students develop social skills they will need later. Throwing tantrums is even less cute as an adult.The Benefit of the Doubt ... SometimesIf your number-one perpetrator says she didn't do something, you didn't see it, and she rarely denies her offenses, she may be telling the truth. Your most frequent culprits aren't responsible for every problem, so try not to yell the same name every time something goes wrong. Chances are your instincts are right, but suppressing your blame reflex shows students you're willing to play fair.What Their Cla.s.smates Need from YouWhen one student is so bad the rest of the cla.s.s can't get an education, you need to balance his rights against those of everyone else. Sometimes you simply owe it to other students to remove this child from the cla.s.s as quickly and as often as possible. In a functional school, this means writing referrals for every incident and following up until they are handled. If you know the office will dismiss your concerns or hold them against you, turn to a coworker you trust. They probably have experience with the situation, and they may have developed some solutions that don't depend on administrative support.Why the Bad Days Are Often Worth It"My first day, one of my third-graders picked up on my inexperience and took control of the cla.s.s. By the third day, he was hanging upside down in his seat. I spent all my energy on this kid's behavior, neglecting other students in the process. I called his house four times before calling any other parents. His grandmother came for a conference, but she couldn't even get him to sit down. I felt I was wasting my breath. Eventually, I started tutoring this student once a week after school. With no cla.s.s to be a clown for, he became a nice kid. Slowly but surely his in-cla.s.s behavior changed, too. By the end of the year, his writing and behavior had both improved significantly. He turned out to be a wonderful student and a cla.s.s leader in a good way. He also taught me a lesson I'm glad I learned early wonderful student and a cla.s.s leader in a good way. He also taught me a lesson I'm glad I learned early-don't give up on those 'nightmare kids.' They can become your most rewarding success stories."Good KidsWe focus so much of our effort on getting kids to cooperate, partic.i.p.ate, do their work, do it right, speak up, and sit down. The chaos of everyday teaching makes it easy to overlook students who do all these things automatically."A new student transferred into my worst cla.s.s. She did all her work and it seemed like she was getting along fine with everyone. At that time I used to give prizes at the end of the quarter for students who had not missed any a.s.signments. This girl won first place, and another girl made a comment under her breath. I don't know what she said, but after that day the girl completely stopped doing her work. She ended up failing the next semester."What They Need from YouThe Right Kind of AttentionGood kids reinforce the image we'd like to have of ourselves as teachers. When we're struggling with other students, it's tempting to look to them as proof of our success or hold them up as examples of what other kids could do if they "tried." Resist the urge to single out good kids as teacher's pets or put them in charge of getting cla.s.smates to behave. They may pay for it socially.A ChallengeKids who are always a step ahead can end up bored, c.o.c.ky, or eternally stuck in a "peer tutoring" role. You've heard of differentiated instruction, but the idea of planning a separate curriculum for one student probably makes you want to breathe into a paper bag. Instead, look for simpler ways to provide that extra push. Loan him books. Add complicated extra-credit problems to quizzes. If possible, recommend him for more advanced cla.s.ses next year.Why That Extra Push Pays Off"I had one seventh-grader who knew every answer to every question and let her cla.s.smates know it. At one point, I even talked with her about toning it down so other kids didn't feel bad. This girl read all the books I a.s.signed in one night-she clearly belonged in a more advanced cla.s.s. I started bringing high school-level and even some college-level books that seemed to fit her interests. I also recommended her for honors cla.s.ses the following year, and her eighth-grade teacher guided her into a magnet high school that fit her talents. She seems very happy at her new school and still comes back to talk about books she has read."How to Like All Your Kids BetterPart of our job is simply to be adults who care about kids. When we're frustrated with students' behavior or lack of effort, we sometimes forget there are other sides to their personalities and things going on in some of their lives that no kid should have to deal with. Students need to know teachers care about them whether or not they are "working to potential." Sometimes it takes a conscious effort to remind yourself that your students are human-and so are you.

1. a.s.sign creative writing pieces that give them a chance to open up. Don't grade them hard, but read them as soon as possible.

2. Take pictures of students on field trips, at recess, or during free time in cla.s.s. Kids seem much more lovable when you can look at them in silence. Post the pictures in your cla.s.s so all of you have memories of the good times.

3. Cut up your cla.s.s list and put the names in a box. Pick one name each morning and make an extra effort to pay attention to the child you picked.

4. Go to extracurricular events at your school and let students know you were there. If a student invites you to a family party, try to make an appearance. Seeing kids in a fresh environment shows you a different side of them, and shows them a different side of you.

All of the Aboveby Roxanna EldenI want my students to learn To see the world with an open mind, To read the fine print before they sign, And not to believe everything they read, But to read Anyway.Because when it's their turn to be heard, I want them to have the right words to say.I want them to stay tough But still hold their own In a conversation With anyone trying to judge them by their level of education.

I want them to hold their own selves to the highest expectations.

But this morning ...

I'll just settle for some basic punctuation.Because today I am hanging by the thinnest thread of patience I can find And I'm grinding my teeth To keep from losing my mind, Trying to find that little piece of genius Buried under laziness And make it shine, Then find those magic words to make sure "No child" gets "left behind,"

(Even when that child is rude, hardheaded, Or even hard to find)."Kids, maybe you can help me help you ... any suggestions?""Uh ... Miss ... ? Do we have to write the questions?"Am I teaching?

Or just preaching?

Making words come from my own mouth for my own good Yelling directions and deep thoughts deep in the back woods Thinking ...

If none of my students hear me, do I even make a sound?

Or am I just another teacher-tree falling on the ground Yelling teacher-lines as I flap my teacher branches around?

But I swear I thought we covered this much ground swear I thought we covered this much ground ... ...NO!!!!!I don't want you to copy the questions!I want to know you are reading And thinking, I want to see that the horse that finally got to this water is drinking.

Just let me know what I have to do What I have to go through To get through.

What concepts do I need to review?

(And doc.u.ment, of course, For when the district comes through But maybe that's my own anger management issue ...)This job is not easy.

And students don't get it: Adults work extra hard Without extra credit. extra credit.

And we know We do whatever it takes ...

Coming early, staying late s.n.a.t.c.hing phones ... calling homes ...

Dealing with that combo Of att.i.tude and hormones ...

Feeding dreams ...

Coaching teams ...

Bribing ... yelling ...

All while we review basic spelling ...

And we feel like we failed When kids don't care if they pa.s.s.

Some days, it's enough to make me want to cut my own cla.s.s or at least ask: What is it about all this that I say I love?

And I can't answer this Until I pull out my cla.s.s list, Read it carefullyAnd circle,"ALL OF THE ABOVE."

11.

Parents: The Other Responsible AdultMost parents at any school in any neighborhood want what is best for their children. The things teachers can do to form productive relationships with parents are usually simple.While most parents will be helpful, however, this world is full of crazy people. Sometimes those people have kids, continue to act crazy, and become crazy parents. Your main relationship is with the child, but a parent on your side can make a huge difference, and a bad parent experience can ruin your day."Parents don't realize how much more you hate their kid after they come in and confront you because they think you hate their kid. I had a mom who claimed I was plotting against her son and that's why he was failing. Her child had not turned in a single paper the whole year, and he came to cla.s.s about twice a month-always with new gym shoes and brand-new clothes that his mommy bought him. He later went to prison. Apparently I wasn't the only one 'plotting' against him.""One father wanted me to begin cla.s.s late whenever his child was late. He even went to the princ.i.p.al demanding this.""A parent walked into my cla.s.s and started yelling at me. I didn't want to have the conversation in front of my cla.s.s, so I stepped outside. She got in my face and backed me up against the lockers and started cursing and threatening me until other teachers came out of their cla.s.srooms and someone called the office for help.""I had one mother who had been a teacher herself and told me my job was easy. She didn't mention why she had stopped teaching.""A parent called my house and called me all kinds of names because her daughter wasn't doing well. She blamed me for the fact that her child hadn't shown her a progress report or report card all semester.""A student in an honors cla.s.s filed some papers he had never turned in and put grades on them. His mother said he would never do this and never lie. We all had a conference with the a.s.sistant princ.i.p.al. It was never resolved, but I believe his mother really knew the truth.""There was a young man in my fourth-period English cla.s.s who thought since we were both Jamaican I would let his bad behavior slide. I had done an excellent job of ignoring his profane language, p.o.r.nographic conversations, and explicit cartoons pa.s.sed around the cla.s.sroom, but I could not ignore his lighting a piece of rolled paper and offering it as 'crack' to another cla.s.smate. Although he did nothing in cla.s.s, this student was smart. The one piece of written work he turned in that year was brilliant, so I was not surprised at his mother's vocabulary when she wrote a nasty e-mail about the referral I submitted for her son, including several references from our shared culture. I thought of many colorful responses to this woman. Instead, I decided to take the e-mail and the referral to the appropriate a.s.sistant princ.i.p.al. I asked him to apply his years of experience to the matter, as I did not think the solutions in my head would result in me keeping my job. He did. So here I am." for her son, including several references from our shared culture. I thought of many colorful responses to this woman. Instead, I decided to take the e-mail and the referral to the appropriate a.s.sistant princ.i.p.al. I asked him to apply his years of experience to the matter, as I did not think the solutions in my head would result in me keeping my job. He did. So here I am.""One father accused me of 'talking out of both sides of my mouth.' I had spoken with him a week earlier because his son was failing the cla.s.s and behaving horribly. The kid's behavior improved, so I called home again, hoping this would encourage him. The father asked if his son was still failing, and when I said yes he called me a hypocrite for calling with good news. No more positive parent contact for him ...""I actually did not have any difficult parents. Most of the parents were-to my biased surprise-ready and willing to help me help their children. One mother was so incensed when I told her that her son had cheated on an exam, she actually called him over and started to hit him while she was still on the phone with me. I felt so bad. I tried to calm her down, but she was pretty heated. I believe that student made it out okay, though. He's in college today!""On the evening of my school's open house, other teachers warned me about parents having att.i.tudes or trying to force me into detailed conferences. They told me to keep it short. But the parents of my ESL students were not the type I was warned about. None of the parents who came that night would ever throw open the door to my cla.s.sroom and yell at me, or demand a grade change from the princ.i.p.al. Very few people in the school spoke Spanish, and these parents were not used to being heard. No one asked me to go out of my way at all, but something in their eyes said, Please be a good teacher. Please educate my child right.' It was a look I could not meet directly yet. A promise I could not make. I kept it short, like the other teachers said." used to being heard. No one asked me to go out of my way at all, but something in their eyes said, Please be a good teacher. Please educate my child right.' It was a look I could not meet directly yet. A promise I could not make. I kept it short, like the other teachers said."Tips for Dealing with Parents in GeneralGet in touch as early as possible. Teachers who introduce themselves to parents early say it sets the tone for the whole year. If you are too overwhelmed to do this, you can forgive yourself. Just don't lose your credibility with students by telling them you will call home if you are too busy to keep the promise.a.s.sume the best. Parents are your allies in most cases. It is safe to a.s.sume that parents have the best interest-or what they think is the best interest-of their child in mind. Even if you don't understand their actions or reactions to you, give them credit for good intentions. Few people want their kids to be failures.Be respectful. This is probably common sense, but you will never get a better att.i.tude from a parent than you give.Be honest. One piece of advice offered as common sense is to feed parents a "compliment sandwich." This means starting and ending negative phone calls with positive comments about the child. When appropriate, starting a call with good news shows parents you don't hate their children or consider them hopeless. In other cases, diluting complaints with compliments can make you sound weak or hypocritical-and toning down a serious offense is just silly. Some teacher phone calls should should make parents feel horrified. One way to show concern without seeming fake is to say you've noticed a change in the student's behavior ("She has never acted like this before, so I'm wondering if something is bothering her"). You can also say something positive about the parents if you have dealt with them before, like "I don't know what you said to him last time we spoke, but I definitely noticed a change in his att.i.tude." Then drop the news about the newest problem. make parents feel horrified. One way to show concern without seeming fake is to say you've noticed a change in the student's behavior ("She has never acted like this before, so I'm wondering if something is bothering her"). You can also say something positive about the parents if you have dealt with them before, like "I don't know what you said to him last time we spoke, but I definitely noticed a change in his att.i.tude." Then drop the news about the newest problem.Write it down. Every time you talk to parents, write down the date, the purpose of the call, and a one-sentence summary of the discussion. Keep these sheets in students' record folders and pull them out before the next call or meeting. These records remind you of past conversations and prove you have made contact.Listen. Sometimes there are valid reasons why students don't work or behave as well as we want them to. Parents may provide eye-opening facts that can help you work better with their children.Special Tips for Especially Difficult ParentsHave proof. Get kids to sign for any form you send home. Keep letters, notes, homework ... anything that proves a point you may need to make later. This arms you if you have to take disciplinary action or give a failing grade. Walking into a conference with a folder full of evidence is a great confidence booster, and it can quickly change the tone of parents who have been taking their children's word over yours.Have someone else around. If you think that a parent may get out of line or lie about something you said, don't meet alone. Have an administrator, another teacher, or even a security guard sit down with you.Keep detailed records. You should always doc.u.ment parent contact, but if you think a parent will cause future problems, write conversations in more detail. You don't need to overdo this-just make sure you can clearly remember your side of the story.Keep your cool. No matter how mad parents make you, remember that you are the professional. They won't have to explain their actions to your boss. You might. They will be gone next year. You don't want to be.

12.

The Teachers' Lounge: Making It Work with the People You Work WithThings Never to Say in the Teachers' LoungeBefore my first year, a veteran teacher warned me to stay out of the Teachers' lounge. She said it would be full of negative teachers gossiping about kids, coworkers, and probably me as soon as I left the room. This turned out to be easy advice to follow. I spent every lunch period in my cla.s.sroom giving "lunch detentions," staring at ungraded papers, or hyperventilating in the dark. At the end of the year, I regretted it. Getting to know your coworkers makes any job more enjoyable, and we all need to socialize sometimes. Why do you think it's so hard to keep the kids quiet?My second year I made sure to eat lunch in the lounge at least once a week, and it wasn't as bad as everyone said. Okay, I'm lying. It was exactly like everyone said, but it was still better than spending the whole day without seeing other adults. I also got to catch up on some good gossip.Over time, you can find the right balance between company and privacy, but there's one guarantee at any school: everyone talks to someone, and someone in the Teachers' lounge talks to everyone everyone. Schools are filled with complex office politics that you won't figure out until well after your first year. With that in mind, here are a few examples of things not to share: - [image]"I'm so hung over."

- [image]"I hate working here."

- [image]"I can't control my cla.s.s's behavior."

- [image]"The teacher next door to me can't control her cla.s.s."

- [image]"This job is easy for me. My kids said they never learned as much with any other teacher."

- [image]"Did you know that fat kid's mom is a lesbian?"

- [image]"I keep staring at our princ.i.p.al's wig while she's talking."

The general rule is that if there is anything you wouldn't want repeated to a coworker, overheard by your princ.i.p.al, or announced out of context over the PA system, the teachers' lounge is not the place to discuss it.Difficult CoworkersMany of your coworkers will be outstanding citizens ... or at least smart, nice people who genuinely care about kids. At every school, however, there are a few reminders that you don't need a license to carry a "#1 Teacher!!!" mug. Here are a few warnings about who might be roaming your hallway.Other New Teachers Who Won't Stop BraggingWhile being a rookie teacher is hard for most of us, some teachers claim to have everything together from the first day. Their students "know who's in charge," "never miss cla.s.s," and "are finally learning that school can be a positive experience." They never struggle with parents or paperwork. In fact, these superstars have solved problems experienced teachers still encounter-and all in the first few weeks! It goes without saying they have already thought of your your best ideas. best ideas."I taught a low-level cla.s.s with 34 students. Two brilliant boys had been stuck in this cla.s.s for years because no one had looked at their files. I filled out the paperwork to switch them to a gifted cla.s.s, also taught by a beginning teacher. A few weeks later, the teacher made a point to tell me one of the students said he was learning more in her cla.s.s than he had in mine. Thanks for the update! She had a cla.s.s of 18 and taught only two subjects, and she still complained regularly. I wish we could have switched for a week.""I had to switch cla.s.srooms with another new teacher in the middle of the school year. My old room didn't have air-conditioning and this was in a hot climate with about 30 teenagers in each room. The first thing this teacher said was 'Your room smells musty. Mine smells nice.' This was not her first obnoxious comment. Needless to say, I didn't mind giving her the room without air-conditioning" was in a hot climate with about 30 teenagers in each room. The first thing this teacher said was 'Your room smells musty. Mine smells nice.' This was not her first obnoxious comment. Needless to say, I didn't mind giving her the room without air-conditioning""Another rookie teacher who taught the same grade I did seemed to have nothing but success stories. We met a few times to plan lessons together, but he often interrupted to have loud, optimistic conversations with parents. We never got around to planning any lessons, and I always left these sessions feeling depressed and inadequate. At the end of the year, I visited my former planning buddy's summer school cla.s.s, hoping to unlock the secret to his success. The secret was ... he wasn't that successful. Don't get me wrong-he worked hard and had some good ideas. However, he also had students who didn't understand a word of his lessons, and others who were openly disrespectful. In other words, his cla.s.s was a lot like mine. I have visited many other cla.s.srooms since and have seen some amazing teachers, but I've seen very little correlation between bragging and excellent teaching."How to Deal with Teachers Who Brag - [image]Don't ask them for advice or admit weaknesses in front of them. They are likely to repeat your problems to make themselves look better.

- [image]Don't try to get them to admit their weaknesses. They won't. With time, though, questions may float to the surface.

- [image]Remember that there is a macho element to being a new teacher, especially for people who believe they must be good at everything right away. In many cases, rookies who claim to have it all under control are secretly rea.s.suring themselves.

- [image]If you can stand it, listen anyway. They may have some good ideas.

- [image]If a coworker's self-promotions start getting on your nerves, smile, nod, and find an excuse to leave the room.

How to Make Sure This Isn't Your Reputation - [image]If you can't offer encouragement to distraught coworkers, at least offer silence. Resist the urge to "inspire" them with chicken-soup-type stories from your own day. Talking about your most recent achievements is actually a sucker punch to their souls and will make them feel lower than they already do.

- [image]If another teacher offers you well-meaning advice, say "Thank you," even if you already knew it. You don't need to prove you know too much to hear advice. You need to prove you know enough to listen to it.

- [image]If your princ.i.p.al makes positive comments during an observation, share them with your mentor teacher or a non-teacher friend, not the struggling rookie next door.

- [image]Remember that other teachers may have harder jobs, even at the same school. This is especially true if you teach high-level students or a cla.s.s that lets you escape test pressure.

- [image]Don't encourage kids to badmouth other teachers. If they do, don't repeat it.

- [image]Remember it is rare for more experienced teachers to see rookies as role models. Many new teachers are full of ideas and willing to put in long hours, but your coworkers have also established routines they can keep up year after year. You haven't yet, and you will show good judgment by remembering to be humble.

- [image]Never a.s.sume you are the only competent or hardworking person in your school. You're not.

Negative TeachersComplaining about your job is a lot like drinking. A little bit, around the right people, can be just what you need. If you do it too much, though, you'll be sorry. You often feel guilty and emotionally drained afterward, and if you do it in the wrong company, you can damage your reputation.Also, as with drinking, some people just can't seem to stop complaining. Negative colleagues can be other rookies who want to know they're not alone or disillusioned veterans who think they're doing you a favor. Sometimes their complaints feel refreshingly honest. Too much time in the company of complainers, however, can leave you feeling hopeless. It's nice to have sympathy after a bad day, but you need to feel your job is still possible and worthwhile. Otherwise, why are you doing it?"There was a teacher who would constantly talk about my seventh-graders in front of her sixth-graders. She wouldn't mention names, but she would point to my cla.s.s list and say things like 'I had this girl last year and now I have her sister. The sister is smart, but the one you have is as dumb as a box of rocks.' She didn't think she was being obvious, but the details she gave were enough for students to figure out who she was talking about. I would see them looking up while they pretended to be working. I could never end those conversations fast enough." but the details she gave were enough for students to figure out who she was talking about. I would see them looking up while they pretended to be working. I could never end those conversations fast enough.""For me, being a role model means having integrity, working hard, being respectful, and acting professional. Sometimes I feel like the actions of other teachers at my school don't really align with those values. There are teachers who complain about their salaries to the kids, who curse at students, or who don't take a lot of time to make cla.s.s meaningful. This is frustrating because it perpetuates a culture of low expectations that hurts my students' self-esteem and desire to succeed. I think some of the burned-out teachers struggle so much to have a positive att.i.tude about students. Lots of times, the negative things they say show their frustration from years of attempting to overcome obstacles and failing to a certain degree."How to Deal with Negative Teachers - [image]Listen. If you want to know your school's dirty secrets, a fed-up veteran is your best source.

- [image]Think twice before jumping in with your own stories. You don't want this person using them as examples next time they complain.

- [image]Don't push complainers too hard to see the bright side. They may just write you off as naive or conceited.