Romeo and Juliet Part 5

Romeo. Commend me to thy lady.

Nurse. Ay, a thousand times. [Exit Romeo.]--Peter!

Peter. Anon?

Nurse. Peter, take my fan, and go before.

[Exeunt.]

Scene V. Capulet's Garden.

[Enter Juliet.]

Juliet. The clock struck nine when I did send the nurse; In half an hour she promis'd to return. Perchance she cannot meet him: that's not so.-- O, she is lame! love's heralds should be thoughts, Which ten times faster glide than the sun's beams, Driving back shadows over lowering hills: Therefore do nimble-pinion'd doves draw love, And therefore hath the wind-swift Cupid wings. Now is the sun upon the highmost hill Of this day's journey; and from nine till twelve Is three long hours,--yet she is not come. Had she affections and warm youthful blood, She'd be as swift in motion as a ball; My words would bandy her to my sweet love, And his to me: But old folks, many feign as they were dead; Unwieldy, slow, heavy and pale as lead.-- O G.o.d, she comes! [Enter Nurse and Peter]. O honey nurse, what news? Hast thou met with him? Send thy man away.

Nurse. Peter, stay at the gate.

[Exit Peter.]

Juliet. Now, good sweet nurse,--O Lord, why look'st thou sad? Though news be sad, yet tell them merrily; If good, thou sham'st the music of sweet news By playing it to me with so sour a face.

Nurse. I am aweary, give me leave awhile;-- Fie, how my bones ache! what a jaunt have I had!

Juliet. I would thou hadst my bones, and I thy news: Nay, come, I pray thee speak;--good, good nurse, speak.

Nurse. Jesu, what haste? can you not stay awhile? Do you not see that I am out of breath?

Juliet. How art thou out of breath, when thou hast breath To say to me that thou art out of breath? The excuse that thou dost make in this delay Is longer than the tale thou dost excuse. Is thy news good or bad? answer to that; Say either, and I'll stay the circ.u.mstance: Let me be satisfied, is't good or bad?

Nurse. Well, you have made a simple choice; you know not how to choose a man: Romeo! no, not he; rhough his face be better than any man's, yet his leg excels all men's; and for a hand and a foot, and a body,--though they be not to be talked on, yet they are past compare: he is not the flower of courtesy,--but I'll warrant him as gentle as a lamb.--Go thy ways, wench; serve G.o.d.- -What, have you dined at home?

Juliet. No, no: but all this did I know before. What says he of our marriage? what of that?

Nurse. Lord, how my head aches! what a head have I! It beats as it would fall in twenty pieces. My back o' t' other side,--O, my back, my back!-- Beshrew your heart for sending me about To catch my death with jauncing up and down!

Juliet. I' faith, I am sorry that thou art not well. Sweet, sweet, sweet nurse, tell me, what says my love?

Nurse. Your love says, like an honest gentleman, And a courteous, and a kind, and a handsome; And, I warrant, a virtuous,--Where is your mother?

Juliet. Where is my mother?--why, she is within; Where should she be? How oddly thou repliest! 'Your love says, like an honest gentleman,-- 'Where is your mother?'

Nurse. O G.o.d's lady dear! Are you so hot? marry,come up, I trow; Is this the poultice for my aching bones? Henceforward,do your messages yourself.

Juliet. Here's such a coil!--come, what says Romeo?

Nurse. Have you got leave to go to shrift to-day?

Juliet. I have.

Nurse. Then hie you hence to Friar Lawrence' cell; There stays a husband to make you a wife: Now comes the wanton blood up in your cheeks, They'll be in scarlet straight at any news. Hie you to church; I must another way, To fetch a ladder, by the which your love Must climb a bird's nest soon when it is dark: I am the drudge, and toil in your delight; But you shall bear the burden soon at night. Go; I'll to dinner; hie you to the cell.

Juliet. Hie to high fortune!--honest nurse, farewell.

[Exeunt.]

Scene VI. Friar Lawrence's Cell.

[Enter Friar Lawrence and Romeo.]

Friar. So smile the heavens upon this holy act That after-hours with sorrow chide us not!

Romeo. Amen, amen! but come what sorrow can, It cannot countervail the exchange of joy That one short minute gives me in her sight: Do thou but close our hands with holy words, Then love-devouring death do what he dare,-- It is enough I may but call her mine.

Friar. These violent delights have violent ends, And in their triumph die; like fire and powder, Which, as they kiss, consume: the sweetest honey Is loathsome in his own deliciousness, And in the taste confounds the appet.i.te: Therefore love moderately: long love doth so; Too swift arrives as tardy as too slow. Here comes the lady:--O, so light a foot Will ne'er wear out the everlasting flint: A lover may bestride the gossamer That idles in the wanton summer air And yet not fall; so light is vanity.

[Enter Juliet.]

Juliet. Good-even to my ghostly confessor.

Friar. Romeo shall thank thee, daughter, for us both.

Juliet. As much to him, else is his thanks too much.

Romeo. Ah, Juliet, if the measure of thy joy Be heap'd like mine, and that thy skill be more To blazon it, then sweeten with thy breath This neighbour air, and let rich music's tongue Unfold the imagin'd happiness that both Receive in either by this dear encounter.

Juliet. Conceit, more rich in matter than in words, Brags of his substance, not of ornament: They are but beggars that can count their worth; But my true love is grown to such excess, I cannot sum up sum of half my wealth.

Friar. Come, come with me, and we will make short work; For, by your leaves, you shall not stay alone Till holy church incorporate two in one.

[Exeunt.]

ACT III.

Scene I. A public Place.

[Enter Mercutio, Benvolio, Page, and Servants.]

Benvolio. I pray thee, good Mercutio, let's retire: The day is hot, the Capulets abroad, And, if we meet, we shall not scape a brawl; For now, these hot days, is the mad blood stirring.

Mercutio. Thou art like one of these fellows that, when he enters the confines of a tavern, claps me his sword upon the table, and says 'G.o.d send me no need of thee!' and by the operation of the second cup draws him on the drawer, when indeed there is no need.

Benvolio. Am I like such a fellow?

Mercutio. Come, come, thou art as hot a Jack in thy mood as any in Italy; and as soon moved to be moody, and as soon moody to be moved.

Benvolio. And what to?

Mercutio. Nay, an there were two such, we should have none shortly, for one would kill the other. Thou! why, thou wilt quarrel with a man that hath a hair more or a hair less in his beard than thou hast. Thou wilt quarrel with a man for cracking nuts, having no other reason but because thou hast hazel eyes;--what eye but such an eye would spy out such a quarrel? Thy head is as full of quarrels as an egg is full of meat; and yet thy head hath been beaten as addle as an egg for quarrelling. Thou hast quarrelled with a man for coughing in the street, because he hath wakened thy dog that hath lain asleep in the sun. Didst thou not fall out with a tailor for wearing his new doublet before Easter? with another for tying his new shoes with an old riband? and yet thou wilt tutor me from quarrelling!

Benvolio. An I were so apt to quarrel as thou art, any man should buy the fee simple of my life for an hour and a quarter.

Mercutio. The fee simple! O simple!

Benvolio. By my head, here come the Capulets.

Mercutio. By my heel, I care not.

[Enter Tybalt and others.]

Tybalt. Follow me close, for I will speak to them.--Gentlemen, good-den: a word with one of you.

Mercutio. And but one word with one of us? Couple it with something; make it a word and a blow.

Tybalt. You shall find me apt enough to that, sir, an you will give me occasion.

Mercutio. Could you not take some occasion without giving?

Tybalt. Mercutio, thou consortest with Romeo,-- Mercutio. Consort! what, dost thou make us minstrels? An thou make minstrels of us, look to hear nothing but discords: here's my fiddlestick; here's that shall make you dance. Zounds, consort!

Benvolio. We talk here in the public haunt of men: Either withdraw unto some private place, And reason coldly of your grievances, Or else depart; here all eyes gaze on us.

Mercutio. Men's eyes were made to look, and let them gaze; I will not budge for no man's pleasure, I.

Tybalt. Well, peace be with you, sir.--Here comes my man.

[Enter Romeo.]

Mercutio. But I'll be hanged, sir, if he wear your livery: Marry, go before to field, he'll be your follower; Your worship in that sense may call him man.

Tybalt. Romeo, the love I bear thee can afford No better term than this,--Thou art a villain.

Romeo. Tybalt, the reason that I have to love thee Doth much excuse the appertaining rage To such a greeting. Villain am I none; Therefore farewell; I see thou know'st me not.

Tybalt. Boy, this shall not excuse the injuries That thou hast done me; therefore turn and draw.

Romeo. I do protest I never injur'd thee; But love thee better than thou canst devise Till thou shalt know the reason of my love: And so good Capulet,--which name I tender As dearly as mine own,--be satisfied.

Mercutio. O calm, dishonourable, vile submission! Alla stoccata carries it away. [Draws.] Tybalt, you rat-catcher, will you walk?

Tybalt. What wouldst thou have with me?

Mercutio. Good king of cats, nothing but one of your nine lives; that I mean to make bold withal, and, as you shall use me hereafter, dry-beat the rest of the eight. Will you pluck your sword out of his pitcher by the ears? make haste, lest mine be about your ears ere it be out.

Tybalt. I am for you. [Drawing.]

Romeo. Gentle Mercutio, put thy rapier up.

Mercutio. Come, sir, your pa.s.sado.

[They fight.]

Romeo. Draw, Benvolio; beat down their weapons.-- Gentlemen, for shame! forbear this outrage!-- Tybalt,--Mercutio,--the prince expressly hath Forbid this bandying in Verona streets.-- Hold, Tybalt!--good Mercutio!-- [Exeunt Tybalt with his Partizans.]

Mercutio. I am hurt;-- A plague o' both your houses!--I am sped.-- Is he gone, and hath nothing?

Benvolio. What, art thou hurt?

Mercutio. Ay, ay, a scratch, a scratch; marry, 'tis enough.-- Where is my page?--go, villain, fetch a surgeon.

[Exit Page.]

Romeo. Courage, man; the hurt cannot be much.

Mercutio. No, 'tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church door; but 'tis enough, 'twill serve: ask for me to-morrow, and you shall find me a grave man. I am peppered, I warrant, for this world.--A plague o' both your houses!--Zounds, a dog, a rat, a mouse, a cat, to scratch a man to death! a braggart, a rogue, a villain, that fights by the book of arithmetic!--Why the devil came you between us? I was hurt under your arm.

Romeo. I thought all for the best.

Mercutio. Help me into some house, Benvolio, Or I shall faint.--A plague o' both your houses! They have made worms' meat of me: I have it, and soundly too.--Your houses!

[Exit Mercutio and Benvolio.]

Romeo. This gentleman, the prince's near ally, My very friend, hath got his mortal hurt In my behalf; my reputation stain'd With Tybalt's slander,--Tybalt, that an hour Hath been my kinsman.--O sweet Juliet, Thy beauty hath made me effeminate And in my temper soften'd valour's steel.

[Re-enter Benvolio.]