Red Saunders Part 4

"We went around and got the doctor.

"'Hoo!' says he. 'Is it as bad as that?' I winked at Father Slade.

"'It's a plenty worse than that,' says I; 'you won't know the half of it till you get down there.'

"But of course we had to tell him, and he was tickled. Funny what an interest everybody takes in these happenings. He wanted all the details.

"'By Jove!' says he, 'the man whose feelings ain't the least dimmed by a broken leg--horse rolled on him, you said? Splintered it, probably--that man is one of the right sort. He'll do to tie to.'

"When we reached the ranch the boys were lined up to meet us.

'Hurry along!' they called. 'Angey can't keep uncle amused all day!'

"So we hustled. Kyle was for being married first, and then having his leg set, but I put my foot down flat. It had gone long enough now, and I wasn't going to have him cripping it all his life. But the doctor worked like a man who gets paid by the piece, and in less than no time we were able to call Loys in.

"Wind-River Smith spoke to get to give the bride away, and we let him have it.

"We'd just got settled to business when in comes Angevine, puffing like a buffalo. 'For Heaven's sakes! Ain't you finished yet?' says he; 'well, you want to be at it, for the old man ain't over two minutes behind me, coming fast. I took the distance in ten-foot steps. Just my luck! Foot slipped when I was talking to him, and I dropped a remark that made him suspicious--I wouldn't have done it for a ton of money--but it's too late now. I'll down him and hold him out there if you say so.'

"Well, sir, at this old Father Slade stood right up, forgetting that foot entirely.

"'Children, be ready,' says he, and he went over the line for a record.

"'Hurry there!' hollers old Bob from the outside, where he was on watch; 'here comes uncle up the long coulee!'

"'What are your names?' says Father Slade. They told him, both red'ning.

"'Do you, Kyle, take this woman, Loys, to have and keep track of, come h.e.l.l or high water, her heirs and a.s.signs for ever?'--or such a matter--says he, all in one breath, They both said they did.

"Things flew till we came to the ring. There was a hitch. We had plumb forgotten that important article. For a minute I felt stingy; then I cussed myself for a mean old long-horn, and dived into my box.

"'Here, take this!' I says. 'It was my mother's!'

"'Oh, Red! You mustn't part with that!' cried Loys, her eyes filling up.

"'Don't waste time talking; I put through what I tackle. Hurry, please, Father.'

"'Has anybody any objections to these proceedings?' says he.

"'I have,' says I, 'but I won't mention 'em. Give them the verdict.'

"'I p.r.o.nounce you man and wife. Let us pray,' says he.

"'What's that?' screeches Uncle Jonesy from the doorway. And then he gave us the queerest prayer you ever heard in your life. He stood on one toe and clawed chunks out of the air while he delivered it.

"He seemed to have it in for me in particular. 'You villain! You rascal! You red-headed rascal! You did this! I know you did!'

"'Oh, uncle!' says I, 'forgive me!' With that I hugged him right up to me, and he filled my bosom full of smothered language.

"'Cheese it, you little cuss!' I whispered in his ear, 'or I'll break every rib in your poor old chest!' I came in on him a trifle, Just to show him what I could do if I tried.

"'Nuff!' he wheezes. 'Quit. 'Nuff.'

"'Go up and congratulate 'em,' I whispered again.

"'I won't,' says he. 'Ouch! Yes, I will! I will!' So up he goes, grinding his teeth.

"'I wish you every happiness,' he grunts.

"'Won't you forgive me, uncle?' begs Loys.

"'Some other time; some other time!' he hollers, and he pranced out of the house like a hosstyle spider, the maddest little man in the Territory.

"Loys had a hard time of it until Kyle got so he could travel, and they went up to the Yellowstone with a team for a wedding trip.

"The rest of Loys's folks was in an unpleasant frame of mind, too.

They sent out her brother, and while I'd have took most anything from Loys's brother, there comes a place where human nature is human nature, and the upshot of it was I planked that young man gently but firmly across my knees. Suffering Ike! But he was one sa.s.sy young man! Howsomever, the whole outfit came round in time--all except uncle and me. He used to grit his teeth together till the sparks flew when he saw me. I was afraid he'd bust a blood-vessel in one of them fits, so I quit. I hated to let go of the old ranch, but I'm pretty well fixed--I'm superintendent here.

It's Kyle's ranch, you know. That's his brand--the queer-looking thing on the left hip of that critter, over the vented hash-knife.

Loys's invention, that is. She says it's a cherublim, but we call it the 'flying flap-jack.' There's a right smart lot of beef critters toting that signal around this part of the country.

Kyle's one of the fellers that rises like a setting of bread--quiet and gentle, but steady and sure. He's going to the State Legislature next year. 'Twon't do no harm to have one honest man in the outfit.

"Now, perhaps if I'd married some nice woman I might have had 1,000 steers of my own, and a chance to make rules and regulations for my feller-citizens--and then again I might have took to gambling and drinking and raising blazes, and broke my poor wife's broom-handle with my hard head. So I reckon we'll let it slide as it is. Now you straddle that cayuse of yours and come along with me and I'll show you some rattling colts."

The Golden Ford

Reddy was on the station platform, walking up and down, looking about him anxiously. We caught sight of each other at the same time.

"Hi, there!" said he and jumped for me. "Gad-dog your little hide!" he cried as he put my right hand in line for a pension. "I thought I was booked to go without saying good-bye to you--you got the note I pinned on your shack?"

"Sure."

"Well, there's time for a chin before the choo-choo starts--thought I'd be early, not savvying this kind of travelling a great deal.

Darned if you ain't growed since I saw you--getting fat, too!

Well, how's everything? I didn't say nothing to the other boys about pulling my freight, as I wanted to go sober for once. You explain to 'em that old Red's head ain't swelled, will you? Seems kind of dirty to go off that way, but I'm bound for G.o.d's country and the old-time folks, and somehow I feel that I must cut the budge out of it. 'Nother thing is I'm superst.i.tious, as you may or may not have noticed, and I believe if you try the same game twicet you'll get just as different results as can be the second time--you heard how I hit it in the mines, didn't you? No? Well, that's so; you dint seen many people out on the flat, have you? Hum. I don't know princ.i.p.ally where to begin. You remember Wind-River Smith's pardner that the boys called Shadder, because he was so thin? Nice feller, always willing to do you a favour, or say something comical when you least expected it--had kind of a style with him, too.

Yes, sir, that's the man. Well him and me was out in the Bend one day, holding a mess of Oregon half-breeds that was to be shipped by train shortly, when old Smithy comes with the mail. 'Letter for you, Shadder,' says Smith, and pa.s.ses over a big envelope with wads of sealing wax all over it. Shadder reads his letter, and folds it up. Then he takes a look over the county--the kind of a look a man gives when he's thinking hard. Then says he, 'Red, take off your hat.' I done it. 'Smithy, take off your hat.' 'All right,' says Smith; 'but you tell me why, or I'll snake the shirt off you to square things.'

"'Boys,' says Shadder, 'I'm Lord Walford.'

"'Lord h.e.l.lford;' hollers Smithy. 'You'd better call somebody in to look at your plumbing--what you been drinkin', Shadder?'

"'Read for yourself,' says Shadder, and he handed him the letter.

"Wish't you could have seen old Smithy's face as he read it! He thought his pardner had been cut out of his herd for ever.

"'It's the G.o.d's truth, Red,' says he slowly, and he had a sideways smile on his face as he turned to Shadder. 'Well, sir,' says he, 'I suppose congratulations are in order?'

"Shadder's hand stopped short on its way to the cigarette, and he looked at Smithy as if he couldn't believe what he saw.