Pride and Prejudice, a play by Mary Keith Medbery Mackaye Part 43

LYDIA.

Oh, mamma! Aren't you glad to see us? [WICKHAM _turns and talks to_ JANE _and_ ELIZABETH.] Do all the people hereabouts know that I am married? I was afraid they might not, and so I let my hand just rest on the window-frame outside the carriage, so that everybody could see my wedding ring; and then I bowed and smiled like everything.

MRS. BENNET.

You may be sure, my dear, that everybody will rejoice with us in our good luck. [_Sighing._] Your marriage is a great compensation to me after all my disappointment about Jane and Lizzy. I do not blame Jane, for she would have got Mr. Bingley if she could. But Lizzy! Oh, Lydia, it is very hard to think she might now have been Mrs. Collins! But how about your clothes?

LYDIA.

Oh, I have a lot already. You may be sure I would not forget _them_.

MRS. BENNET.

[_Alarmed._] But you didn't know the best warehouses! Well, never mind, we will see to that later. Now you must all come in and have dinner.

You must be famished. Come, girls. Come, my dear Wickham.

[_They all go toward the house. At the door_ LYDIA _pushes_ JANE _back_.]

LYDIA.

Ah, Jane, I take your place now. I go first because I am a married woman.

[_They all go into the house. After a pause_, HARRIS'S _voice is heard outside_.]

HARRIS.

Will not you come into the house, Madam?

LADY CATHERINE.

[_Entering, followed by_ HARRIS.] No, I prefer to remain here. Tell Miss Elizabeth Bennet that a lady wishes to see her at once. Remember, I cannot be kept waiting.

HARRIS.

Yes, Madam. [_He bows and goes out._]

LADY CATHERINE.

[_Looks about her with a sniff, then deliberately seats herself in the big garden chair with the umbrella over it. She mutters to herself from time to time and taps her foot impatiently._] Insufferable impudence!

Conceited little minx! She shall have a piece of my mind.

[ELIZABETH _comes to her from the house_.]

LADY CATHERINE.

[_Without moving._] Miss Bennet, you can be at no loss to understand the reason of my journey hither. Your own heart--your own conscience must tell you why I come.

ELIZABETH.

[_In unaffected astonishment._] Indeed, you are mistaken, Madam. I am not at all able to account for the honour of seeing you here.

LADY CATHERINE.

Miss Bennet, you ought to know that I am not to be trifled with. I have just been told that you--that Miss Elizabeth Bennet would in all likelihood be soon married to my nephew, Mr. Darcy. Though I know it to be a scandalous falsehood, I instantly resolved on setting off for this place that I might make my sentiments known to you.

ELIZABETH.

[_With astonishment and disdain._] If you believed it impossible to be true, I wonder you took the trouble of coming so far. What could your Ladyship propose by it?

LADY CATHERINE.

At once to insist upon having such a report universally contradicted.

ELIZABETH.

[_Coolly._] Your coming to Longbourn to see me and my family, will be rather a confirmation of it, if indeed such a report is in existence.

LADY CATHERINE.

If! Do you then pretend to be ignorant of it? Do you not know that such a report is spread about?

ELIZABETH.

I never heard that it was.

LADY CATHERINE.

And can you likewise declare that there is no foundation for it?

ELIZABETH.

Your Ladyship may ask questions which I shall not choose to answer.