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"I'm not going to answer such a ridiculous question," said Lucius sulkily.
"Then I will answer it for you," said Mr. Binney. "You _did_ write it.
I know you have always nourished evil feelings against that excellent woman Martha Higginbotham, who I hope will one day do you the honour of becoming your mother. Not content with wreaking your unfilial spite against your own father who begat you, you must smirch the good name of a lady who has always loaded you with kindness. Out upon such conduct, I say."
Lucius held his head in his hands. "I suppose I shall understand it all soon," he said. "At present it sounds like one of Dr. Toller's sermons. Is there anything about you and Mrs. Higginbotham in the advertis.e.m.e.nts, father? I've read all the rest of the rag and I don't remember her name being mentioned."
"What is that name, sir?" asked Mr. Binney, pointing to the signature of his imaginary mother's letters.
"Martha Binney," read Lucius.
"Yes, Martha Binney," echoed his father. "And in two years and a half from now, Martha Higginbotham will change her name for Martha Binney, if we're both spared."
"It'll be a change for the better then, as far as she's concerned,"
said Lucius. "But what _are_ you driving at, father? You can't really think I wrote that or had anything to do with it. I'm not such a scug as all that."
"And pray who else up here but you knows that Mrs. Higginbotham's name is Martha?" inquired Mr. Binney. "That's my point."
"Well, I don't think it's much of a point," said Lucius. "It's a fluke, their happening to hit upon that name. But, look here, can't you stop this sort of thing? It's really awful the way things are going on. I don't suppose there's anybody ever been up here who's had such a miserable time as I'm having. Other fellows respect their fathers. You simply don't give me a chance."
This touched Mr. Binney to the quick. He was very susceptible to criticism since Mirrilees had spoken to him so plainly. "I'm afraid I have given you some reason to say that, my boy," he said. "I--I was led away last term. I was under a wrong impression of what was the thing and what wasn't the thing. But that is all changed now. I have become a reading man and a boating man. I have turned the page on everything else."
"There was that dinner with Howden and the rest of them the very night after we came up," said Lucius.
"It was the last dinner that Howden will get out of me," said Mr.
Binney. "I have done with him--at least I hope so."
"Well, then, there's some hope," said Lucius. "And, look here, father, if you've really given up that sort of thing there's a much better chance of your getting on with the fellows worth knowing. I shouldn't take any notice of that business, if I were you. It will die down in time. Would you care to come to lunch to-morrow? Mirrilees is coming.
He's a good chap, you'll like to meet him."
"Oh, I know him well. He was in my rooms a few days ago," said Mr.
Binney. "But I should like to meet him again very much. Yes, I'll come, Lucius," and Mr. Binney went away feeling that the reward of good behaviour had already come, in spite of the _New Court Chronicle_.
But, alas! Mr. Binney's reputation proved harder matter to live down than he had antic.i.p.ated. The men whom he met on the river fought rather shy of him, for to tell the truth, there was very little to recommend the poor little gentleman as a companion for youth if he was to be taken seriously as he now seemed to desire. Howden and Co. had only put up with him because of his dinners, and because, at the time he had consorted with them, he had apparently not objected to being made the b.u.t.t of their not over-refined pleasantries. He now led a very dull and dejected life, but his work kept him employed, and the prospects of his boat in the Lent races gave him something to look forward to with keen expectation. The First Trinity first Lent boat had fallen to the fourth place on the river, but this year it was by far the best crew practising, with the possible exception of the head boat. It was expected to make its first three b.u.mps with comparative ease, and to row an exciting race with Trinity Hall in the last night of the races for the head place on the river. Whenever Mr. Binney felt inclined to get down-hearted at the thought of his unpopularity he would buoy himself up with the antic.i.p.ation of the glory that would accrue to him if his hopes were realised.
Unfortunately the editor of the _New Court Chronicle_ found his journalistic ingenuity increasing with practice, and spent such pains over "The Binney Correspondence," that that feature of his paper soon became the talk of Cambridge. After the third number Mr. Binney wrote him a letter of expostulation, which he published with appropriate comment, but of which he took no further notice. That week's instalment of the Correspondence contained an account from "Your repentant son, Peter Binney," of how he had been asked to dine with the Vice-Chancellor, had disgraced himself by drinking too much wine, and had been escorted home by the two Esquire Bedells with their silver pokers, while he raised the town with a spirited rendering of "Rule Britannia." Mrs. Binney, the mother, expressed herself heart-broken at the news, and announced her intention of coming up to Cambridge to implore the Vice-Chancellor to overlook the offence, and give her erring boy another chance. She also alluded to her grand-daughter Lucy, who was supposed to be studying at Girton College. "She is a good girl," wrote the old lady, "and would be ashamed to carry on in the way you do, Peter, but the dear child tells me she wishes she had been sent to Newnham College. She likes the students there so much better."
Poor little Mr. Binney went round to his son's rooms almost in tears.
He found Lucius still more angry than himself, for, although his admiration of the Newnham girl was well known among his immediate friends, and he did not take a mild degree of chaff on the subject at all ill, the vulgar publicity now given to it goaded him to the verge of desperation.
"Oh, it's you, father," he said. "I'm going round to that fellow Piper to tell him if this business isn't stopped I'll knock his teeth down his throat."
"Ah, Lucius," said Mr. Binney plaintively. "I wish I was big and strong like you. I'd have done that long ago. But you're a good boy to stick up for your poor father. I'm going to increase your allowance by 10 for asking me to lunch to meet Mirrilees, and if you get these disgraceful attacks stopped I'll add another 20. You'll get back to the old figure if you're careful, and even beyond it."
"Thanks, father," said Lucius, "but I don't want paying for doing a thing like that. I've got a little score of my own against Mr. Piper, and I'm going to pay it off now." And Lucius took up his cap and left the room.
CHAPTER XI
"PUT HIM IN THE FOUNTAIN"
Mr. Binney had wished he was big and strong like his son. As a matter of fact Lucius was quite a light weight, and although wiry and in good condition, it was certain that he was quite incapable of fulfilling his threat of knocking Piper's teeth down his throat, unless Piper allowed him to do so without making any resistance, which was unlikely. Piper was a great heavy lump of bone and muscle, over six feet high, and quite as fit as Lucius, for the latter had been finally rejected for the University boat, for this year at least, and had gone out of training, while Piper was still playing football. These considerations did occur to Lucius as he walked from his own rooms to those where Piper carried on his editorial functions, but he was so angry that they carried little weight with them. In the New Court he met Dizzy.
"Come up here with me," he said. "I've got a little job on."
Dizzy followed him up the staircase to Piper's rooms, talking volubly, as was his wont; but Lucius gave him no answer.
Piper was discovered sitting at his table talking to Howden, who stood with his back to the mantel-piece.
Lucius plunged into his business without any preface.
"Look here, sir," he said, "I've come about this stuff you've been printing about me and my father. I'll trouble you to stop it, if you don't mind."
Piper's face darkened. He was a bad-tempered man. He was also a clever man, and having no reason to be alarmed at any possible violence on Lucius's part, which he would rather have welcomed than otherwise, he thought he might as well draw him into a battle of words and afford his intellect some little amus.e.m.e.nt. So he choked down his temper and said quietly:
"You are Mr. Binney, junior, I believe. You are not mentioned from one end of the paper to the other, except as having had the chuck from the 'Varsity boat, and I don't see you've any reason to complain of that."
"That's a lie," said Lucius instantly. Piper started from his chair, but sat down again and waited. "You know perfectly well," continued Lucius hotly, "that that rot about Lucy and Girton is meant for me, and even if it wasn't I object to your making fun of my father."
This was what Piper wanted. "Is the other Binney your father?" he said with a sneer. "I didn't know it. If I had a father like that I'd drown him."
Lucius made a dash forward, and Piper stood up with an evil smile on his face. But Stubbs caught hold of his friend and pulled him back, and Howden stepped forward.
"Oh, come now, Pips!" expostulated he, "don't overdo it, old man."
But Piper took no notice. He suddenly lost all control over his temper.
"What the devil do you mean by coming bl.u.s.tering here?" he shouted.
"Get out of my rooms this minute or I'll throw you out of the window.
Yes, you'd better keep him back, you putty-faced swab"--this to Dizzy--"if he comes near me I'll put some marks on him that he won't lose in a hurry."
Lucius shook off Dizzy's encircling grasp.
"Will you stop printing lies about me and my father?" he said.
"I won't stop anything," rejoined Piper.
"Then will you fight?"
"Fight! By G--, yes. Take off your coat and try."
Howden and Stubbs both tried to stop them, but they might as well have tried to stop the tide rising. They were shaken off impatiently.
Piper pushed the table and sofa aside, and in less than three minutes after Lucius had entered the room they were at it hammer and tongs.
There was not much science displayed. The room was too small, for one thing, and there was a good deal of damage done to furniture and breakables before it was all over. If Lucius had kept cool he might have made up in some measure for the great disparity in weight between them, for he knew just a little more of the game than Piper; but both of them were blind with rage, and it was attack on both sides, with very little defence, as long as it lasted.
It did not last long. Lucius fought as long as he could stand, but his blows got weaker and weaker, while Piper got in again and again with as much force as at first. At last he knocked Lucius clean through the gla.s.s doors of a cupboard which held his stock of crockery, and he fell heavily on to the floor, and lay there insensible, with the blood pouring from his head. Piper had not had enough even to cool his pa.s.sion. "Get a towel and water from the bedroom," he said to Dizzy, who was kneeling by the side of his friend. "And take him out of this as soon as you can. I'm not going to stay in the same room with him."
And he put on his coat and went out of the room.