Patricia Brent, Spinster Part 30

"Let's call things by their right names," said Lady Tanagra. "At the present moment you're putting up rather a big fight against your own inclination, and you are causing yourself a lot of unnecessary unhappiness. Is it worth it?" she asked.

"One's self-respect is always worth any sacrifice," said Patricia.

"Except when you are in love, and then you take pride in trampling it under foot."

With this oracular utterance Lady Tanagra departed with a bright nod, a smile and an insistence that Patricia should not come downstairs.

CHAPTER XIII

A TACTICAL BLUNDER

"I often think," remarked Lady Tanagra as she helped herself a second time to hors d'oeuvres, "that if G.o.dfrey could only be condensed or desiccated he would save the world from ennui."

Elton looked up from a sardine he was filleting with great interest and care; concentration was the foundation of G.o.dfrey Elton's character.

"Does that mean that he is a food or a stimulant?" enquired Patricia, Elton having returned to his sardine.

Lady Tanagra regarded Elton with thoughtful brow.

"I think," she said deliberately, "I should call him a habit."

"Does that imply that he is a drug upon the market?" retorted Patricia.

Bowen laughed. Elton continued to fillet his sardine.

"You see," continued Lady Tanagra, "G.o.dfrey has two qualities that to a woman are maddening. The first is the gift of silence, and the second is a perfect genius for making everyone else feel that they are in the wrong. Some day he'll fall in love, and then something will snap and--well, he will give up dissecting sardines as if they were the one thing in life worthy of a man's attention."

Elton looked up again straight into Lady Tanagra's eyes and smiled.

"Look at him now!" continued Lady Tanagra, "that very smile makes me feel like a naughty child."

The four were dining in Bowen's sitting-room at the Quadrant, Lady Tanagra having decided that this would be more pleasant than in the public dining-room.

"Can you," continued Lady Tanagra, who was in a wilful mood, "can you imagine G.o.dfrey in love? I don't think any man ought to be allowed to fall in love until he has undergone an examination as to whether or no he can say the right thing the right way. No, it takes an Irishman to make love."

"But an Irishman says what he cannot possibly mean," said Patricia, with the air of one of vast experience in such matters.

"And many Englishmen mean what they cannot possibly say," said Elton, looking at Lady Tanagra.

"Oh," cried Lady Tanagra, clapping her hands. "You have drawn him, Patricia. Now he will talk to us instead of concentrating himself upon his food. Ah!" she exclaimed suddenly, turning to Elton. "I promised that you should fall in love with Patricia, G.o.dfrey."

"Now that Tanagra has come down to probabilities the atmosphere should lighten," Elton remarked.

"Isn't that G.o.dfrey all over?" demanded Lady Tanagra of Bowen. "He will snub one woman and compliment another in a breath. Patricia," she continued, "I warn you against G.o.dfrey. He is highly dangerous. He should always be preceded by a man with a red flag."

"But why?" asked Bowen.

"Because of his reticence. A man has no right t to be reticent; it piques a woman's curiosity, and with us curiosity is the first step to surrender."

"Why hesitate at the first step?" asked Elton.

"Think of it, Patricia," continued Lady Tanagra, ignoring Elton's remark. "Although G.o.dfrey has seen _The Morning Post_ he has not yet congratulated Peter."

"I did not know then that I had cause to congratulate him," said Elton quietly.

"What mental balance!" cried Lady Tanagra. "I'm sure he reads the deaths immediately after the births, and the divorces just after the marriages so as to preserve his sense of proportion."

Elton looked first at Lady Tanagra and then on to Patricia, and smiled.

"Can you not see G.o.dfrey choosing a wife?" demanded Lady Tanagra, laughing. "Weighing the shape of her head with the size of her ankles, he's very fussy about ankles. He would dissect her as he would a sardine, demanding perfection, mental, moral, and physical, and in return he could give _himself_." Lady Tanagra emphasized the last word.

"Most men take less time to choose a wife than they would a trousering," said Elton quietly.

"I think Mr. Elton is right," said Patricia.

"Then you don't believe in love at first sight," said Bowen to Patricia.

"Miss Brent did not say that," interposed Elton. "She merely implied that a man who falls in love at first sight should choose trouserings at first sight. Is that not so?" He looked across at Patricia.

Patricia nodded.

"An impetuous man will be impetuous in all things," said Bowen.

"He who hesitates may lose a wife," said Lady Tanagra, "and----"

"And by a.n.a.logy, go without trousers," said Elton quietly.

"That might explain a Greek; but scarcely a Scotsman," said Patricia.

"No one has ever been able to explain a Scotsman," said Elton. "We content ourselves with misunderstanding him."

"We were talking about love," broke in Lady Tanagra, "and I will not have the conversation diverted." Turning to Patricia she demanded, "Can you imagine G.o.dfrey in love?"

"I think so," said Patricia quietly, looking across at Elton.

"Only----"

"Only what?" cried Lady Tanagra with excited interest. "Oh, please, Patricia, explain G.o.dfrey to me! No one has ever done so."

"Don't you think he is a little like the Scotsman we were talking about just now?" said Patricia. "Difficult to explain; but easy to misunderstand."

"Oh, Peter, Peter!" wailed Lady Tanagra, looking across at Bowen.

"She's caught it."

"Caught what?" asked Bowen in surprise.