Ore no Kanojo to Osananajimi ga Shuraba Sugiru Vol 3 Chapter 7

#7: Double Date in the Movie Theater is Mayhem

—Why are you going all out?

 

On the station square we agreed to meet on for the date.

When I first saw Fuyuumi, who was already waiting there, this was my first impression.

She wore casual clothes.

She had put on a cute pale pink camisole and denim shorts, plus a sleeveless lace dress on top. With slight changes in the light, the camisole occasionally became transparent, that somehow made me nervous. She was revealing her white shoulders that normally were hidden under her uniform. Somehow I didn't know where to look.

Why put up this kind of effort?

This obviously wasn’t a date. It was merely just some friends going to watch a movie.

"Y-You’re late. I already waited, like, five minutes!"

Fuyuumi pouted and turned her head to the side showing the usual 'tsun' att.i.tude. It was good to see that on the inside she was still the same disciplinary committee member.

"Sorry, I was a little late with leaving the library."

"Oh, really?! It’s so great to know you’re putting your mind so much into studying! You study-idiot!"

After Fuyuumi had turned towards me, she suddenly lowered her head and shyly said:

"U-Um, Ki-Ki-Kidou-kun?"

"Y-Yes?"

Because she was that nervous, it somehow affected even me, strange.

"What do you think of my outfit? Does it look weird? Do I look like a bad student?"

"Bad student?"

What are you talking about? That white lace dress looks nothing like fashion sense bad student’s should have.

"Because you recently said, 'Wouldn’t it be better to wear normal clothes'..."

Oh, right. Now that I think of it, this was something we chatted about at the family restaurant.

"Hm, don't worry, don't worry. It's definitely not something a bad student would wear."

"R-Really...?"

"It's more of the opposite, I think it’s really cute and feminine."

It's been a while, but I noticed that Fuyuumi caught the attention of all the men on the plaza. If I arrived just a bit later, Fuyuumi probably would have incessantly been hit on.

Then—

"F-Fuyuumi, is something wrong?"

Fuyuumi suddenly blushed and even grabbed my hand tightly, then started waving it up and down!

"O-Outside!"

"Eh?"

"I’m, just a little, I’M GOING TO RUN OUTSIDE————!"

Why are you dragging me along as well?

"Calm down, Fuyuumi! We’re already outside!"

"No way?! Then, where am I supposed to run?"

"Don’t run! Kaoru is almost here, let's just wait here quietly!"

Probably due to my words, Fuyuumi stopped shaking my hand. Ah, she had almost dislocated my shoulder.

Fuyuumi lowered her head for a while and her shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath. Finally, she regained her composure.

"...You know..."

"What is it this time?"

"Don't you remember?"

"What?"

Fuyuumi clutched my hand, and her face grew increasingly red.

...So cute.

For some reason, her behavior had been really cute this day.

"Holding hands like this, something that already happened, don't you remember?"

"Huh?"

Just what time are we talking about?

There was no holding hands when we were at the family restaurant… nor when we were picking restaurants? Or when we were at the cafeteria?

I could feel Fuyuumi’s hand continuously geting hotter, and while I rapidly tried to search through my memories—

 

"KOTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE————[1]!"

 

A cry suddenly echoed through the square!

I instantly let go of Fuyuumi's hand.

And a few milliseconds after, the air where our hands had been at was slashed by a rapid movement.

Only one person in the world would do such a thing.

 

"Ahahahaha, Ei-kun, your dodging is as magnificent as ever— But next time I’ll aim for the chest, eh—?"

 

Harusaki Chiwa smiled widely and stood with her legs astride, even as she threatened to kill me. Naturally, her eyes weren't smiling at all.

"C-Chiwa, what a coincidence— Why are you here—?"

I suppressed my fear, and approached Chiwa as stipulated in Masuzu’s battle plan.

 

Step 1: Chiwa 'coincidently' appears at our meeting place for the date.

Step 2: 'I’ve always wanted to see that movie! Why don’t we go together since I just happen to have free time?'

Step 3: 'Sure, it’s better if there’s an even number of boys and girls.'

Step 4: Kaoru: 'If Eita really thinks so…', Fuyuumi: 'I guess it can't be helped.'

 

—Yeah, the plan originally was something like that, but—

"Why are you here, Harusaki Chiwa?! To wave around a shinai on the streets, you delinquent!"

"And what are you supposed to be doing here, Fuyuumi Ai?! You’re even holding hands with Ei-kun! Indecent! Indecent!"

Errrr—

For some reason, I keep getting this 'it's ruined' feeling?

"W-What’s indecent?! You actually dare to say that to a disciplinary committee member?! You of that Self-Performing Group have no right to say that to me!"

"You have nothing to do with the Disciplinary Committee during summer break! That being said, what are you wearing? Wasn’t that outfit an advice from 'Pachi Lemon'?! Yay, a copy cat! A copy cat!"

"Wh-Wh-Who is copying what————?! Baka————! This is obviously an outfit that Ai-chan spent a lot of effort to come up with on her own———[2]!"

This isn't any better than child quarrel.

Because it was summer time, there were many families at the plaza. To kids pa.s.sing by, these two must have looked like a nice show.

Please, someone stop them...

"Ah, sorry I’m late—— Hey, why is Chihuahua-chan here?"

When Kaoru appeared five minutes late, Chiwa and Fuyuumi were already pinching each other’s faces.

Chiwa seemed to finally remember the battle plan, abruptly left Fuyuumi alone and forced an unnatural smile:

"Hey, uh, Kaoru-kun, h.e.l.lo! I heard you were going to the movies?"

"Yeah, we’re going to see an action movie called 'Ashura Fight'."

"Great— I always wanted to see that movie— Hey, can I go with you?"

"Eeeeeh?"

Fuyuumi and Kaoru cried out almost simultaneously.

They were really surprised.

Well, it was nothing special that Fuyuumi, who was the complete opposite of Chiwa, acted like that. But even Kaoru who was supposed to have a good relationship with Chiwa reacted in the same way.

"A—Ah— but we only have three tickets—"

"Of course I’ll pay for the ticket myself."

"R-Right— Ah, you got me there…"

Kaoru scratched his head while looking at Chiwa and Fuyuumi’s faces.

Then—

"A-chan, can you come over here for a moment?"

"Huh? What for?"

"C'mon, it's just for a while."

Kaoru pulled strongly on Fuyuumi’s hand and took her a little further away. It seemed like he was whispering something to Fuyuumi carefully.

While I was guessing what he was saying, Chiwa pulled on my ear and said:

"E~i-ku~~n~~? Why were you holding Fuyuumi Ai’s hand?"

"Ouch, Ouch! There was no reason! It's just that this and that happened!"

"...If you get serious, 'I'll kill you'. I already said that, right?"

"No, you didn’t! At least the kill part! Still, I wasn’t even being serious! This was the battle plan!"

"Battle plan?"

"Masuzu’s battle plan for making Fuyuumi fall in love with me and seize her weaknesses!"

Even though what just happened had nothing to do with the battle plan, I just said it was the same thing.

Chiwa finally left go of my ear and said:

"But when I see Fuyuumi’s face, I don’t see it like that."

"Even if you tell me that, it bothers me too."

Fuyuumi’s expression was definitely unusual.

It felt like a very serious facial expression that carried a lot of weight, with a very profound air.

What did she want me to remember anyways?

—At this point.

'Can you hear me? Eita-kun, Harusaki-san?'

Masuzu’s voice came through the small earphone.

Chiwa and I had brought the mike and headset, and wired it in our sleeves, then brought it the sleeve to our mouth to speak:

"No problem, I can hear you."

"Same, I can hear you—"

"Good. From now on I will give comments this way… Furthermore, Harusaki-san, please do not make a sudden ruckus. The plan was nearly ruined by that little scene."

"Eh, you saw that? Where are you?"

"Behind you on the right side of the station, I’m sitting next to the fountain."

We looked in the direction that she described, and Masuzu dressed like a detective from a TV show waved slightly. Her conspicuous silver hair was hidden in a hat, and her blue eyes were covered by sungla.s.ses.

At this time Kaoru brought Fuyuumi back, and Chiwa and I hurriedly cut off our communication.

"Sorry to keep you waiting— So, Chihuahua-chan is coming with us?"

"It’s okay? Sorry for showing up without being invited."

"We can go in pairs, so it's perfect when we think about it. How should we match up?"

Fuyuumi was inexplicably twitchy, and Kaoru pushed her back towards me.

"W-Why is Fuyuumi paired with Ei-kun?"

When Chiwa made the complaint, Masuzu’s voice immediately came through.

'What are you saying? This goes just like planned!'

"Well... I guess that’s true."

Chiwa reluctantly kept her mouth shut. Great, it seemed like she still had some bit of rationality left in her.

"Well let’s go then, Chihuahua-chan ♪"

Kaoru casually pulled on Chiwa’s arm and went off.

"Uuuu, Ei-kun, don’t stay so close to Fuyuumi."

Even though Chiwa looked back several times, she was still led away. Ah— Kaoru was so impressive. He could even keep that Chiwa in check.

"How about we go too, then?"

"I-It can't be helped. I guess I'll accompany you!"

"Oh, thanks."

Many people tend to start their sentences off with 'ah' or 'errr', but I only knew one person who said, 'It can't be helped', and that was Fuyuumi AI.

And I had become completely used to it.

 

♦

'Ashura Fight' was adapted from a bestselling novel of the same name and as well as an international film.

The male lead was a young businessman named Eiji (age 25). It was about a month after he was married to his childhood friend Tina (age 25).

However, when the former lover Amy (age 25), who was presumed to have died at sea a few years ago, appeared, their fates completely changed. Amy and Eiji had once vowed to marry each other, so Eiji’s heart was unsteadily torn between his two beloved women—

Reading the synopsis would make one think it was a romance film, but it was actually cla.s.sified as 'action film'. Tina and Amy could use paranormal powers, and their fights could shake the earth and torrent the sea. Eiji could only clutch his head and worry. Not considering the budget for the CG and martial arts scenes, it seemed like it had hit a blockbuster record since it had been released last week.

In either case, the most interesting part of this film was—

"Eh, an open voice event?"

I couldn’t help but ask at the ticket office. Kaoru nodded with a smile on his face.

"It’s the same like when you attend a sports compet.i.tion. It’s okay if you laugh, cry, or shout in the middle of the movie; I even heard there were people who cheered for some of the characters in the film."

"Such a ground-breaking approach."

This activity really undermined the idea of going to a movie like it had been until now.

"Of course, for people who want to watch a quiet movie, there’s another section for that type of screening too. But this is a rare opportunity, so let’s try this one."

"Ah! I wanna try! I wanna try this one! It looks so interesting!"

Chiwa’s eyes sparkled with excitement, probably because she was a sports-loving kind of person. This sort of activity seemed to go well with her.

"Well, I’m all right with it too... Fuyuumi?"

"I-I am fine with it too, with either ways!"

Fuyuumi shyly said while lowering her head like usually.

As to why she was so shy, it was probably due to the boys around us who were staring at her. There was even a couple of which the boy kept staring at Fuyuumi, causing his girlfriend to pinch his face. When Fuuyumi wore her uniform, she wasn’t nearly as eye-catching, but her appeal when dressed up like this was clearly immense. If the people at school saw Fuyuumi as she was right now, she would probably be a worthy rival in 'popularity' to that Masuzu.

Incidentally, speaking of Masuzu, she was in the nearby concessions stand, wolfing down a large bucket of popcorn. She must have been venting and overeating, probably because she was surrounded by couples from all directions.

After the staff exchanged our pre-sale tickets with seat tickets, we entered the theater. We sat in the middle of about four hundred seats, from right to left facing the screen: Kaoru, Chiwa, Me, and Fuyuumi. Even though I didn’t know where Masuzu’s seat was, she was probably sitting somewhere she could see us.

Just when I was thinking this—

'Eita-kun, why are you just staring blankly? Engage Fuyuumi in conversation.'

—This small voice could be heard.

"What should I say?"

'Of course you should talk so that she gets hooked on you, wasn't that clear already?'

…T-T-Talk so that she gets hooked on...

'Make sure that Fuyuumi-san becomes captivated by you, and also neither say nor do anything I would consider cheating. Quite simple, isn't it?'

"THE DIFFICULTY IS WAY TOO HIGH——!"

I couldn’t help but shout.

"What’s wrong? The movie hasn’t even started yet."

Fuyuumi couldn’t help but ask from beside me with her head tilted in puzzlement.

"S-Sorry, ummm..."

I racked my brain to find something to talk about.

"What kinds of movies does Fuyuumi usually watch?"

"Ah— I rarely watch movies."

"I see—"

"[...]"

"[...]"

The talk that 'gets her hooked on me', thus concluded...

Without a moment of delay, Masuzu made contact:

'What are you doing? Are these the limits of your conversation abilities?'

"Even if you say that, I just can’t think of anything to say!"

'In these situations, the topic you chat about doesn’t have to relate to the movie. Any topic with any background is okay, so come up with something.'

If any topic is okay...

If that’s the case, then there was that.

"Fuyuumi....."

"What?"

"Did you see yesterday's 'Magure Punishment Extreme'?"

｢YOU ARE BRINGING THAT UP AGAIN———————————!?｣

What a surprise, for Masuzu to play the part of the tsukkomi.

On the other hand, Fuyuumi nodded her head:

"Mh, I guess you could say I've seen it."

"Really?! Then you are someone who knows what I'm speaking off!"

If that’s the case, it’s time to charge!

"Yesterday, in that episode called 'nabe again', it focused on police protagonist Yasu-san's boss and section chief 'Manabe'. I think this episode was the best emotional drama in the entire second season. Even though Nabe-san is typically someone who's just harsh with his subordinates and really not that likable, this time he was completely different from usual. Normally, he pushes everything on Yasu-san so he can drink tea, but this time he personally set out to investigate a criminal who attacked a child in the streets. He even took the initiative to set up an ambush, the reason being 'my only daughter was killed in a traffic accident'. It was really interesting! It’s something really rare in this contemporary structure of drama, and it’s G.o.dly, I tell ya—! A G.o.dly drama!"

I finished in one breath, and ex'ed the cola I bought from the concessions stand.

Whuu— So happy! Just so happy!

I didn’t realize carbonic acid after talking about 'Maguke' could be this refreshing!

—Well, with regards to Fuyuumi’s reaction:

"Kidou-kun."

"Y-Yes?!"

"Nabe-san isn’t a section chief. He’s a division chief, right? Wasn’t he promoted at the end of the first season?"

"...Oh, right."

Fuyuumi softly added:

"I think that Nabe-san was portrayed as a pretty honorable person in the past. For example, in the third episode of the first season, when Yasu-san was locked in solitary confinement while he was searching for drugs, Nabe-san turned a blind eye and even shielded Yasu-san in the hallway."

"...I guess you could see it like that…"

"Also, it wasn’t the first time that the plot point about Nabe-san’s daughter appeared. 'Maguke' used to not be a weekly show, and when they still broadcasted the episodes on special occasions, they explained this plot point once. Maybe because many recent fans don’t know about the content from the specials, they re-explained it."

"A-Amazing! Fuyuumi is so well-informed! I’m really impressed!"

"Really? For a fan, this is common sense though."

"[...]"

"[...]"

The talk that gets her hooked on me thus concluded...

At this time, I could hear another one of Masuzu's messages:

'Yay, she beat you, she beat you—'

"Shut up! You are so freaking annoying——————!"

At this time the sound which informed the viewers that the movie was about to start echoed throughout the cinema.

"We’ll talk later, Masuzu."

I hurriedly turned off my phone. Even though shouting was allowed, it wasn’t good to have phone calls during the film.

After about five minutes of commercials and advertis.e.m.e.nt notices, the main feature began.

The movie started with a close-up shot— a close-up of a very scary zombie. Even though it was an action movie, this was a really confusing opening.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

In the audience the sound of four women screaming echoed, and their noise actually scared me. I see. This was the reason they allowed shouting.

Then Fuyuumi’s fingers touched my left hand.

I whispered:

"Are you afraid, Fuyuumi?"

"O-O-Of course not. Just this little bit..."

Even though she said that, she tightly gripped my left hand.

I felt it was a little embarra.s.sing, but at this time another set of small fingers touched my right hand.

"Gyaaaaaaarghhhh—— That huuuuuuuuuurts—"

Chiwa had clenched my hand with all her strength, and suiting a person from the Kendo club, she had an incredibly strong grip.

"Hey, you, Chiwa! what are you doing?!"

"I determined it was cheating! What's up with that, being all 'deredere'."

"I was not being 'all deredere'!"

Then Kaoru loudly issued a 'cough' and cleared his throat:

"Even though the event doesn’t prohibit chatting, you should probably still try to be more quiet."

Chiwa and I both hurriedly shut up, and nodded to those around us in apology. However, everyone was already looking forward to shout around, so they didn’t notice.

And just like this, the story continued to develop.

Precarious on the edge of life and death, Amy had returned from her accident. However, because her former boyfriend was stolen by Tina, she erupted in anger and the battle finally started.

"Get rid of her, Amy!"

Ai-chan shouted with her fist held high.

"What, Tina! this short woman isn’t your equal! Your looks, brains, and personality are all superior to her! Superior! Superior! The childhood friend is so pretentious, you should just beat her up!"

For her own part, Chiwa was also screeching at the top of her lungs:

"Do your best, Tina-chan! That Amy woman is the worst! She’s actually taking advantage of her position and tries to steal him! Don’t argue with her, just hit her already!"

It seemed like Fuyuumi was with Amy, and Chiwa with Tina. They both empathized with their respective characters.

The two of them began fighting in the center of a large city. Amy fired lasers and burned down buildings, while Tina’s beam sword cut open the earth. In between them, their beloved Eiji kept rushing about back and forth in panic. His behavior made the audience laugh.*

From the middle of the laughs, I could hear the taunting voice of one woman.

"How miserable, Eiji. Can you even call yourself a man? How come your ex-girlfriend’s b.u.t.t excites you to that extent, you hideous pervert! Women’s toilet overdrive! You Doppyun serenade! Underhanded! Kidou Eita!"

"THAT LAST PART CLEARLY INVOLVED MY NAME! OI, COME, SHOW YOURSELF ALREADY!"

I turned away from the screen and shouted into the audience, but I couldn’t see a trace of Masuzu. d.a.m.n! Where was she hiding?

On the other hand, Chiwa and Fuyuumi's excitement was escalating.

"IT'S YOUR CHANCE, TINA-CHAN! THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO DEFEAT AMY! SHOW HER THAT THE BONDS OF CHILDHOOD FRIENDS ARE THE STRONGEST!"

"AMY WON'T LOSE! IF IT'S THE BONDS, YOU HAVE THEM TOO! WHAT'S IMPORTANT IS THE DEPTH OF THE RELATIONSHIP, NOT THE LENGTH!"

"LENGTH OR DEPTH, OF COURSE THE CHILDHOOD FRIEND HAS IT ALL!"

"THAT'S JUST YOUR OWN CONCEIT!"

I felt the situation had developed very strangely.

Even though they were watching the screen… However, they obviously weren’t arguing about the characters on the screen.

"IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CONCEIT! BECAUSE WE WERE ALWAYS TOGETHER AND ALWAYS LIVED TOGETHER EVERY DAY!"

"SO EVERY OTHER GIRL HAS TO STEP BACK?! TO GIVE UP LIKE THAT?!"

"HA! JUST WHAT DO YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT CHILDHOOD FRIENDS?!"

 

"IT'S YOU WHO DOESN'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING!"

 

Fuyuumi’s tone suddenly changed.

I couldn’t help but turn around, and I saw Fuyuumi’s eyes slightly tearing up.

 

"HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY UNDERSTAND HOW A GIRL FEELS WHO WASN'T ALLOWED TO BECOME A CHILDHOOD FRIEND!"

 

Chiwa stared at Fuyuumi, stunned.

Kaoru also stared at Fuyuumi with a strange expression.

"Errr— What is it all of sudden?"

I asked Fuyuumi timidly, but she coa.r.s.ely wiped her face with her arm.

And then she returned to her original unyielding expression:

"Right, there! Amy, give her the final blow!"

—Fuyuumi acted as if nothing had happened, and began to cheer again.

Chiwa stared at the side of Fuyuumi’s face for a while, and as the plot had moved on and the battle scene did end, she looked back at the screen; Kaoru did the same.

I also turned back to the movie screen— But I couldn’t remember what happened in the movie after that.

However, Fuyuumi’s words lingered in my ears, 'Wasn't allowed to become a childhood friend'.

 

♦

When this was all over.

After saying farewell to Fuyuumi and the rest, I met with Chiwa and Masuzu in the nearby café. I asked if she had any photographs that could be used as 'Fuyuumi’s weakness'—

 

"After thinking about it, it's forbidden to take pictures in movie theaters, right?"

 

"[...]"

"[...]"

With nothing to say in front of us, Masuzu knocked the side of her head and said:

"The episode of Masuzu-san epic fail[3], *tehe*♪"

"ARE YOU MESSING WITH MEEEEEEE————?!"

 

Seize the Disciplinary Committee Member’s Weakness! Heartbeat? Heartbeat! Date Battle!

 

E•p•i•c • F•a•i•l!

 

Translator notes and references Jump up↑ Kote: In Kendo, you are supposed to yell where you hit. Kote means "glove" aka "hand". Jump up↑ It has been mentioned that there is an "Ai-chan" that submits suggestions to Pachi Lemon. Jump up↑ Epic Fail: Reference to Fuyuumi's, 'Epic win'.