Olla Podrida Part 41

_Capt. Mer._ Dearest Agnes, you have indeed made me happy. (_Embraces her._) I accompanied your brother, with the sole view of pleading my own cause. Imagine then my misery at your cruel reception.

_Agnes._ That you may not think me interested by my accepting your generous offer during this state of uncertainty, I will own how often I have thought of you, and how eagerly I looked for your arrival. Let us go now, Mertoun, and see whether Lady Etheridge is recovered.

[_Exeunt arm in arm._

_Scene V._

_The wood. Enter Nelly._

_Nelly._ I have tried in vain to dissuade them to abandon their projects. They are preparing their instruments and their weapons. They have determined to attempt the Hall to-night. I have written this letter to Sir Gilbert, and, if I can find any one to convey it, the scoundrels will be taken and punished. If I cannot, I must contrive some means to escape to the Hall; but they suspect me, and watch me so narrowly, that it is almost impossible. What shall I do? There is somebody coming; it is that fool, Peter Bargrove. Then all is right. I will make use of him.

_Enter Peter._

Your servant, fortunate sir!

_Peter._ Fortunate! why now ar'n't you an infamous hussy? Hav'n't you taken my purse and my money, for your intelligence that I was changed in my cradle,--and what has been the consequence?

_Nelly._ That everybody has been astonished.

_Peter._ I have been astonished, at all events. I have had so many cudgellings that I must count them with my fingers. First, a huge one from old Bargrove; secondly, a smart one from Captain Etheridge; and thirdly, a severe one from Sir Gilbert. What is the value of your good news if no one will believe it?

_Nelly._ Very true--but how could you expect they would?

_Peter._ Then what's the good of knowing it?

_Nelly._ You must know a fact before you attempt to prove it. You only bought the knowledge of me, you never paid for the proof.

_Peter._ No; but I've paid for the knowledge. (_Rubbing his shoulders._) But didn't you say that Mrs Bargrove would confess?

_Nelly._ I thought it likely--but, if she won't, we must make her.

_Peter._ How?

_Nelly._ Bring evidence against her that will convict her, so that she will find it useless denying it.

_Peter._ But where is it?

_Nelly._ Here (_holding out the letter_).

_Peter._ Give it me.

_Nelly._ Stop, stop; you've not paid for it.

_Peter._ Upon my honour, I've not got a farthing in the world. I durst not ask either father or mother after the bobbery we've had. Indeed, I hardly know whether I dare go home and get my victuals, Won't you trust me?

_Nelly._ When will you pay me?

_Peter._ When I come to my t.i.tle and estate.

_Nelly._ Well then, as I think you are a gentleman, I will trust you.

Now observe, this letter is addressed to Sir Gilbert. It contains a statement of facts that will astonish and convince him. You must not trust it into other hands, but deliver it yourself.

_Peter._ He'll cudgel me.

_Nelly._ No, he will not. But, even if he did, would you mind a few blows for the certainty of being one day Sir Peter Etheridge?

_Peter._ No, hang me if I do. They might all cudgel me together, if they could cudgel me into the only son of a baronet of ten thousand a year.

_Nelly._ Well, then, as soon as you can, go boldly up to the Hall, and say to Sir Gilbert, "Sir Gilbert, in justice to yourself, read this letter, and do not despise the caution, as it is all true." You will then see the effect of it.

_Peter._ See--not feel. You are certain he won't be angry. Well, then, I will--in this case I'm in a great hurry as anybody. I can promise. So good-bye. [_Exit._

_Nelly._ Now I think all is safe; but I must quit the gang or my life will be in danger.

_Enter Old Bargrove, with Constable._

Oh, that I could recall the last twenty years! How wicked, how infamous have I become.

[_Covers her face with her hands. Old Bargrove advances and taps her on the shoulder. Nelly starts._

Mercy on me!

_Old Bar._ You must not expect much. I believe you tell fortunes, my good woman!

_Nelly._ (_curtseying._) Yes, sir, sometimes.

_Old Bar._ And steal geese and turkeys?

_Nelly._ No, sir, indeed.

_Old Bar._ Well, you help to eat them afterwards, and the receiver is just as bad as the thief. You must come along with me.

_Nelly._ Along with you, sir!

_Old Bar._ Do you see this little bit of paper? But, now I look at you, haven't we met before?

_Nelly._ Met before, sir!

_Old Bar._ Yes--hold your head up a little, either my eyes deceive me, or you--yes, I'll swear to it--you are Nelly Armstrong. Not quite so good-looking as you were when we parted. Now I understand all. Come, take her along to the Hall at once.

_Nelly._ Indeed, sir----

_Old Bar._ Not a word. Away with her, slanderous, lying, mischievous----[_Exeunt omnes._

_Scene VI._

_A Drawing-Room in the Hall._