Off Limits Part 3

"Like h.e.l.l."

"Your eyes look better."

She nodded. "There's not as much pain in my shoulder now."

Jim held up the piece of twisted shrapnel. "If you were a marine, you'd get apurple heart for this."

Alex stared up at the piece of metal that had been lodged in her shoulder. "Nowonder I fainted."

"Right after I started," Jim said. "I'm glad. It saved you a lot ofsuffering." He placed the shrapnel in her right hand. "A souvenir from thewar."

She shook her head slowly from side to side. "What an awful reminder."

Jim couldn't argue. "Most of the wounds our guys carry around aren't the kindyou can see, anyway."

"What do you mean?"

"My pa carried a lot of invisible wounds. I recall him screaming and waking usup at night years after the war. Ma said they were just bad dreams. But afterPa had one, he'd be in a dark mood for at least a week. Now," Jim admitted, "Iunderstand why...."

Alex desperately wanted to know more about Jim, what had made him run, but thepills were already beginning to work. She began to feel light-headed, some ofthe pain receding from her shoulder. "My father was a navy pilot in World War II. I remember him telling me about some of his flights," she began, her voiceslurring. "I never heard him scream or have nightmares."

"The air war's clean in comparison to being a grunt on the ground," Jim said.He wiped Alex's forehead and cheeks with a damp cloth. She was beginning tosweat heavily, and that bothered him. "Pa was on the ground, at Guadalca.n.a.l,Iwo Jima and other islands. He never spoke to us of those times, but Iremember seeing the haunted look in his eyes." With a shake of his head, Jimadded, "Don't look too closely at mine. I'm afraid they've seen worse thanPa's."

There was such anguish in Jim's eyes at that moment that Alex wanted to cryfor him, for whatever terrible trauma he'd survived. "I-I'm sorry."

He smiled gently and bathed her neck. "You have nothing to be sorry for, gal.You're innocent." He added painfully, "It's always the innocent women andchildren who get caught in the crossfire of war...."

Alex wanted to pursue the utter sadness she saw in his eyes, but withoutwarning, her eyelids closed and she felt a deep, spiraling sensation. On theedge of exhaustion and sleep, Alex dreamed of the Lone Ranger and Tonto ridingtogether.

Chapter Four.

Morning came slowly and with a lot of inner pain for Jim. Off and on throughthe night he'd tended Alex because she'd grown feverish. Afraid the VC mightstill be near, he hadn't dared to sleep. Instead, he'd lain on the ground nextto her, his nearness seeming to quiet her. Sometimes he'd nodded off for halfan hour or so before her restless sleep had jerked him awake again. Now, asthe bare hint of light from dawn crawled into the darkened tunnel, Jim greweven more worried.

Alex was delirious, and when he lifted the compress to examine her wound, hesaw how red and inflamed the flesh had become. Grimly, he bathed her face,neck and arms, trying to lower her temperature. She needed antibiotics, or shewould die. And that couldn't happen. His mind worked over his limited options.Each time he looked down at her vulnerable features, a little more of hisresolve to remain a deserter was chipped away. Yes, he'd made a decision tolive in peace, to stop contributing to the war effort. But that decisionhadn't included Alex. As he took in her glistening features, he could no longer deny his conscience: he had to get her help.

Alex's lashes fluttered and opened. Jim smiled uncertainly down into herdulled gray eyes. "'Morning, gal. How you feelin'?"

"... Rotten... I'm so thirsty, Jim...."

"Figured as much. Hold on." He slipped his arm beneath her shoulders andgently brought her into a sitting position. He saw her lips set into a line a.s.she struggled not to cry out. The movement of sitting upright, he was sure,hurt her shoulder, creating ma.s.sive pain for her to manage. She lifted herhand to hold the wooden cup, but he continued to guide it to her lips,realizing how weak she'd become in the twelve hours since he'd removed theshrapnel. Thirstily, Alex drank three cups of the water.

As Jim laid her back down and pulled the blanket back over her, he said, "I'vegotta get you some antibiotics. That wound of yours is infected."

Alex nodded slightly. "I feel light-headed, and I'm seeing crazy things."

"You're going in and out of delirium," Jim agreed as he pressed his hand toher forehead. She was burning up. He feared her fever was around a hundred andthree, but he didn't tell her. No sense in alarming her. Her being a nurse puther in touch with those possibilities anyway.

Jim's hand steadied Alex's whirling, tilted world, and she forced a slightsmile. "Last night...last night I dreamed crazy dreams."

"Like what, gal?" He took a cloth, wrung it out and placed it across herforehead.

"You were the Lone Ranger and I was Tonto. We were running from the VCtogether." Alex closed her eyes. "Isn't that stupid? I hate war, I hate guns,and there I was, right in the middle of it with you."

"Better to dream it than do it for real," Jim said in a low voice. When sheopened her eyes, he smiled. "Did we outrun them?"

"Yes... but it was awful."

"Dreams, my ma once told me, are a good place to work out your feelings andfears." He gently touched her tangled hair. "I think that's what you weredoing."

"Your mother sounds wonderful."

"A real practical lady," Jim agreed. "I miss her wisdom-I miss her cooking."He grinned. "I remember waking up mornings as a kid growin' up and smellingcorn bread bakin', eggs fryin' and coffee brewin'. Hunger drove me out of myattic bunk, and I'd sit at the table with blue John, corn bread and eggs,eating as if there was no tomorrow."

"Blue john?"

He laughed softly. "Missouri slang, gal. Blue john is skim milk to you cityfolk."

When Jim smiled, the terrible tension in his features eased. Alex stared upwonderingly at his lean face. "Your whole face changes when you smile."

Jim looked away. Her compliment took him by surprise. "I'm just a lanky hillboy from Missouri, not a very good-looking sort."

"I think you have a wonderful face," Alex parried softly. "Your eyes tell mehow you feel. And I like it when you smile."

Jim refused to look at Alex. "If I were worth anything at all, I'd have gottenyou back to the marine firebase by now."

"If you weren't worth anything, you'd have left me in that jungle to die or becaptured."

Rubbing his face, Jim glanced down at Alex. "You carry the faith of the worldin your large heart. You know that?"

"I'm an idealist," Alex agreed. "But then, so are you."

"Me?"

"Yes. My father's a congressman, and he's a realist. He's always accused me-"

"A congressman?" Jim turned toward her, astounded.

Blankly, Alex studied his suddenly tense face. "Didn't I tell you father's acongressman?"

His mouth went dry. "No." His mind whirling, Jim knew without a doubt that allkinds of rescue missions would be sent to find Alex. It had been three dayssince the crash. Maybe that's why the VC activity around their tunnel hadincreased. The marines no doubt had sent in a recon team to try to locateAlex, or at least to investigate the crash sight.

"What's wrong, Jim?"

He shook his head. "Nothing's wrong." Every firebase in the vicinity would beon the lookout for Alex. Getting her safely through the net of VC to themarines might be possible after all!

First things first, Jim reminded himself grimly. "I need to get someantibiotics, Alex."

She watched as he moved to the other wall of the tunnel and retrieved his webbed belt with its numerous pouches and sheathed Kabar knife. "How?" Hervoice sounded scratchy to her own ears, and she felt as if she were burning up.

"There's a VC camp about two miles away." He hooked the belt around his waistand settled his dark green utility cap on his head. "I've stolen from thembefore. I know where they keep drugs for their injured."

Her eyes widening, Alex whispered, "No! You could get killed, Jim!"

Surprised at her cry, he moved to her side. "Now, listen, gal, don't worryyour purty head about me. I don't intend to get caught."

"But," Alex cried softly, tears forming and falling down her cheeks, "what ifyou are?"

He stroked her wet cheek, wiping away the tears. "Now, now," he soothed, "I'mnot gonna get caught. Hush now, you just lie here and rest."

Reaching out, Alex gripped his hand and felt his strength, his gentleness, ashis long fingers wrapped around her much-smaller hand. "I don't know what youdid, but it doesn't matter," Alex whispered, her voice cracking. "You're worthsaving, Jim McKenzie. You're not a bad person, do you understand that?Whatever you're running from doesn't matter to me."

Jim smiled sadly down at Alex. "Gal, you're the kind of woman a man would beproud to keep company with. If you knew what I'd done... well, you'd tell meto leave." He gave her fingers a last squeeze and placed her hand on herblanketed stomach. "Don't get all het up over this, Alex. I need you to restand gather your strength. Worrying about the likes of me is a worthlesscause."

"No, it's not!" Alex felt vulnerable as never before. Perhaps it was the fevermaking her feel helpless. Jim's quiet and steadying presence had given her afragile if illusory sense of safety. With him leaving, Alex felt a surge ofpanic.

The urge to lean over and explore her soft, trembling lower lip struck Jimfull force. How clean, innocent and trusting she was. He felt dirty and guiltyinside. He didn't deserve her. He patted her hand. "You'll be okay, gal." Heslowly got to his feet, favoring his left leg. He motioned to his M-14 riflelying on the ground, its wooden stock broken. "The rifle doesn't work. If VCcome around, you're gonna have to be real quiet. Understand?"

Alex nodded.

"Good." In the semidarkness, Alex choked back a sob. As Jim limped to thetunnel entrance, she realized just how tall and lean he really was. There wasa confidence that emanated from him, like a beacon of steady light in a heavyfog.

At the concealed hole, Jim halted. He turned and glanced at Alex's frightenedfeatures. The shadowy gray of her eyes tore heavily at him. "If I'm not backin four hours, gal, you wait until nightfall, then head due north. That'swhere the firebase sits." He pointed to indicate the direction. "Travel onlyat night, and travel quiet."

Fear ripped through Alex. The horror of Jim possibly being killed or capturedoverwhelmed her. "Please, don't do this, Jim. Not for me-"

"Hush," he whispered, and one corner of his mouth lifted in the semblance of asmile. "You're worth dying for, but I don't intend to let that happen. I'll beback as soon as I can. I'll throw a pebble or two into this hole so you knowit's me coming back and not a VC snooping around."

Before she could protest further, he lithely lifted himself up and out of thehole. He covered the hole with leaves and branches and was gone. Real fear ateat Alex's disintegrating control. She wanted to scream but didn't dare.Instead she lay quietly, trembling, as fever alternated with chills in herpain-racked body.

Haunted, Alex closed her eyes and spiraled into a nightmare world of thehelicopter crash and the resulting fire. In the midst of the traumatic dreams,Jim McKenzie was there, protecting her, taking care of her when she felthelpless as never before. Her father appeared, yelling at her because she'dcrashed and kept him waiting. Interspersed were Jim's lean features, his darkblue eyes twinkling with a smile, his face relaxed. Alex clung to that imageof his face, to the innate gentleness she saw in the curve of his mouth and the way he'd touched her as he'd tried to bathe away her fever. How couldsomeone like him be a killer? It didn't make sense... and then she capitulatedto another round of nightmares involving the war that surrounded her.

Jim tossed several pebbles into the tunnel opening before moving forward onhis belly. The sun was midway across the triple canopy, the light diffused. Atthe entrance, he froze and listened. No sound came from within the tunnel. Foran instant, terror deluged Jim. He looked around to see if any of hiscamouflage cover had been disturbed. Dread had eaten at him all the way to andfrom the VC encampment. He kept picturing Alex being discovered by the enemyand dragged out of the tunnel. But the foliage appeared undisturbed. Good.

Easing himself into the entrance, his bare feet touching the hard-packed earthbelow, Jim quickly glanced around the tunnel's darkened recesses. Reliefshattered through him. Alex lay asleep. Thank G.o.d. Quickly, he replaced thecover over the hole and sank to his hands and knees. First things first, hehad to wash his hands before he touched her wound.

Alex awakened when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Her lashes flew open tosee Jim crouched above her, a silent welcome dancing in his eyes.

"Jim!"

He managed a thin smile. "How you doin', gal?" He took the compress off herwound. The flesh was red and swollen.

"Did you run into any trouble?"

"Piece of cake." It was a lie, but Jim didn't want to worry Alex. He laid thecompress aside and brought out an amber bottle. "Take a look-sulfa," heannounced proudly, and unscrewed the cap. "Direct from Hanoi."

Closing her eyes, Alex whispered, "I'm just glad you made it back okay."

"I had the best reason in the world," he teased her. "I had you to come backto. Now, don't make a sound. I'm gonna pour some of this directly on thewound. I don't know how much it might hurt."

Alex steeled herself and refused to watch Jim. Surprisingly, there was littlepain a.s.sociated with the yellow powder he generously poured onto the festeringflesh. He replaced the compress. There was something healing about Jim'stouch, the way he cared for her.

"I had awful nightmares," Alex admitted. Jim sat next to her after retrievinga bowl of rice. He hungrily dipped into the contents.

"About the crash?"

"No, about losing you."

He shrugged his shoulders.

She watched him for a long moment and saw ruddiness steal into his cheeks.Warmth flooded Alex, and she sensed his terrible aloneness as never before.Over what? Too tired to pursue the topic, she asked, "Did any VC spot you?"

"No." Jim wiped his fingers on his pant leg. He pointed to the far wall. "Imanaged to steal us some more rice, too. I'll make it for us late thisafternoon before dark. I don't want the light from the magnesium tab to givethis place away to some sharp-eyed VC. Hungry?"

Alex shook her head. "Not really. Just worried to death."

Jim laughed softly, feeling suddenly lighter, better than he could recall in along time. Getting to his knees, he brought the bowl to Alex. "I want you totry to eat. I know the fever's got you in its grip, but you've got to keep upyour strength, gal."

The way he cajoled her made Alex respond despite how bad she felt. "You shouldhave been a doctor," she muttered as he helped her sit up, then used his bodyas a support for her to lean against.

"You know, Ma said the same thing." He watched Alex pick up a small bit ofrice with her fingers. "She said I was good with animals. I always had somecritter around the cabin that I was getting well."

"I believe it. I'm feeling better just because you're back," Alex admitted.The rice was tasteless, but she ate for Jim.

Having Alex tucked beneath his arm, resting against him, sent a feeling ofserenity through Jim. He sighed and closed his eyes. Her feminine scent, thatspecial womanly fragrance, reminded him of a far less harsh world and sentdizziness tracing through him.

"You keeping company with anyone?" Jim barely realized he'd asked thequestion. He was afraid of the answer-and disgusted at the foolishness of hisasking in the first place. How could anyone as pretty as Alex, and acongressman's daughter, not be attached to some lucky man?

"Keeping company?"

He blushed and cleared his throat. "Sorry, it's my Missouri slang getting inthe way. Keeping company means going steady or being engaged to some fella."

With a m.u.f.fled laugh, Alex shook her head. "Are you kidding me?" When she sawhis suddenly intense gaze turn in her direction, Alex felt heat nettle hercheeks. Becoming serious, she said, "No. I used to have a boyfriend, but weparted ways a couple of months ago. What about you? The way you talk aboutMolly Pritchard, I thought you might be engaged or married to her."

It was his turn to laugh softly. "No, Molly went on to marry the captain ofthe football team-a city fella whose pa owns a furniture store. Molly did wellby herself."

"You liked her, though."

"Yeah," he said wistfully, "I always had a crush on that little gal." And thenJim glanced down at Alex. "But I was this ganglin' boy who tried to go throughhigh school barefoot, until the princ.i.p.al whacked me across the rear with aruler for not followin' the rules. Molly didn't want to be embarra.s.sed by thelikes of me."

Her heart twinged with pain, Jim's pain. "I'd like you, shoes or no shoes."

With a chuckle, he glanced down at his dirt-stained bare feet. "You don't havemuch choice, gal."