Miss Eden's Letters Part 30

MY DEAREST PAM, Our letters crossed, and yours was just what I wanted, and you are as great a dear as ever, only I am never to be allowed to see you....

A week ago we began our preparations. You do not and cannot guess what that is--and I have despaired of writing you even a line--I never knew before _really_ what it was to have no time. And besides the deep-seated real Indian calamity, you cannot think what a whirl and entanglement buying and measuring and trying on makes in one's brain; and poor Goliath himself would have been obliged to lie down and rest if he had tried on six pairs of stays consecutively. We sometimes are three hours at a time shopping, and I could fling myself down and scratch the floor like a dog that is trying to make a feather bed of the boards when I come home.

It is so irritating to want so many things and such cold articles. A cargo of _large fans_; a _silver busk_, because all steel busks become rusty and spoil the stays; nightdresses with short sleeves, and net nightcaps, because muslin is too hot. Then such anomalies--quant.i.ties of flannel which I never wear at all in this cool climate, but which we are to wear at night there, because the creatures who are pulling all night at the Punkahs sometimes fall asleep. Then you wake from the extreme heat and call to them, then they wake and begin pulling away with such fresh vigour that you catch your death with a sudden chill. What a life!

However, it is no use thinking about it.

My present aim in writing is to ask whether there is not anybody in or near Dublin who can make a sketch of you, something in the Edridge[428]

or Slater line, not very extravagant in price, and if you do not mind, sitting for it for me. I will send its price by Lord Morpeth, when he goes, and you must send it me either by a private hand, or if not, we can have it sent under cover to George, if it is carefully packed. Will you?

What do you think of the Lords? It is hardly possible to conceive such hopeless folly, and it is clear that they are the only living animals that cannot learn experience.

We shall be off in less than a month I believe, not that I believe anything somehow,--I feel too dreamy and bewildered. Your ever affect.

E. E.

_Miss Eden to her Sister, Mrs. Drummond._

ADMIRALTY, _Sat.u.r.day [September 1835]._

MY VERY DEAR MARY, Your note was a sad blow to me; but perhaps it is best that we should so have parted, and I am very thankful that we should have had this week together. I am thankful for many things--that we love each other so entirely; that you have a husband who has been so invariably kind to all of us, and whom I can love in return; and then, that your girls seem to me like real friends, and almost like my own children. All these are great goods and absence cannot touch them. G.o.d bless you, my darling Sister. Your ever affectionate

E. EDEN.

_Lady Campbell to Miss Eden._

CARTON, _September 1, 1835._

I fear there is no good sketcher in Dublin, but there is a man who does paint something like a miniature, and does catch a likeness, and it shall be done for you next week, my darling. I never have you out of my mind a minute, and I always thought I should not be sorry if a change sent a Tory out instead of you.... I feel cheerful about you because you are doing what is right, and only think what you would have been suffering now if you were seeing him prepared to go without you....

Shall we take good in this world and not take the evil, _our old compensations_? You might have lived years without either you or George knowing how much you loved each other, and is there not an utter delight in this feeling of devotion twice blessed?

Let me know how I am to write to you, and how to send my letters. How little did I imagine when I read of India, and looked on those hot, misty, gorgeous Indian views, that I should ever garner up part of my heart there. I am staying here.[429] I always like them, but there is a want of colour and life and impulse. There are many positive virtues present, and an absence of all vice and evil, but yet something is wanted. There is the dreaminess of Sleepy Hollow upon them.

Send me a bit of your hair, my darling, and always bear me in your "heart of hearts, as I do thee, Horatio." I cannot believe it yet, nor do you, dearest, in spite of the preparations, and it is best you should not believe it till it is over....

It must be done, and so it had best be well done! and I will not hang to your skirts and make it harder for you to go forward and do right, only I felt all the love I have borne you for all these years choking me till I sobbed it well out, you whom I loved as my own sister.... I was not surprised at it; I felt it would be, it was so like life--such a horrid piece of good fortune, such a painful bit of right to be done.

How right the Wise Men were to come _from_ the East! Only, I should not have been particular about going back again; I had rather have stayed and sat in Herod's back-parlour for the rest of my life.

When once it is over you will be very busy and very amused. Emmy, I mean to open an account with you. I mean to keep a letter always going to you, and so tell you every week what I am thinking about, because, you know, in India, without any vanity, I may be very sure my letters will be valuable. It will cool you to read anything coming from the damp West.... I have been so eager about the Corporations, for Corporation in this Country means abomination! And when I heard them all spitting and scratching about the t.i.the Bill, I thought what will they say to the Corporation Bill that sweeps so much farther.

There is a great deal of rage and fury fermenting here, but I think there will be no explosion. I own I am sorry to see that the fury of the Orangemen, tho' it may not drive the lower orders of Protestants to fight, will, by making him fancy himself ill-used, persuade him to emigrate. Thousands are preparing to emigrate.

I do not hope to see Ireland better in my time, and it often makes me so sad, for I do love it with the love one feels towards the child that is most weak, most sick.

_Miss Eden to Mrs. Lister._

ADMIRALTY, _Thursday, September 1835._

MY DEAREST THERESA, I was very near you yesterday, and at the time I had appointed, but my heart failed me about taking leave for so long a time, and as I took one of those fits of lowness which sometimes come over me now (partly from real bodily fatigue), I saw I should do nothing but cry if I went to you, and that would be hard upon you and tiresome withal.

Besides, taking leave is at the best of times a hateful process, so I would not go to you. And now, G.o.d bless you and yours, my very dear friend. I daresay when I come back I shall find _you_ just what you are now, and _yours_ very much increased in number and size.

Be sure to write to me a fortnight at the very latest after you see our departure announced, and put your letter under cover to Lord Auckland, Government House, Calcutta, and put it in the common post, if that is more convenient to you. Otherwise, if you can find anybody to frank it to Captain Grindlay, 16 Cornhill, he is our agent, and will at all times take charge of letters and parcels for us. Pray give my best love and wishes to Mrs. Villiers. Ever your affectionate

E. E.

_Miss Eden to Mrs. Lister._

ADMIRALTY, _September 1835._

MY DEAREST THERESA, I have received your pretty bracelet with tears, which is a foolish way of accepting what is very dear to me, but every day my heart grows more sore, and I look with greater despondency to an utter separation from such kind friends as mine have proved themselves.

I did not need anything, dearest, to remind me of you. Our friendship has happily, as far as I remember, been entirely free from even those little coolnesses and irritations which will mix sometimes with the closest intimacies. I cannot recollect the slightest _tiff_ between us, and therefore I have no fears of the _effect_ of absence, but still the absence itself is most painful. And your bracelet will then be an actual comfort to me, and besides thinking it so particularly pretty in itself, I am glad that it is one that I may wear constantly without fear of injuring it. I have put it on my arm, and there it will stay, I hope, till we meet again.

I am just setting off to Eastcombe to fetch home f.a.n.n.y, who will be delighted with your recollection of her. To-morrow we are to go to the _Jupiter_ to settle the arrangements of our cabins, but Wednesday, late in the day, we will go to Knightsbridge.

G.o.d bless you, my very dear friend. Many thanks for this and all the many kindnesses you have shown me. Your ever affectionate

E. E.

_Lord Melbourne to Miss Eden._

SOUTH STREET, _September 24, 1835._

My Mother always used to say that I was very selfish, both Boy and Man, and I believe she was right--at least I know that I am always anxious to escape from anything of a painful nature, and find every excuse for doing so. Very few events could be more painful to me than your going, and therefore I am not unwilling to avoid wishing you good-bye. Then G.o.d bless you--as to health, let us hope for the best. The climate of the East Indies very often re-establishes it.

I send you a _Milton_, which I have had a long time, and often read in.

I shall be most anxious to hear from you and promise to write. Adieu.

Yours,

MELBOURNE.

_King William IV. to Miss Eden._

WINDSOR CASTLE, _September 26, 1835._

The King cannot suffer Miss Eden to quit this country without thanking her for the letter she wrote to Him on the 24th inst., and a.s.suring her of the satisfaction with which He received it.

His Majesty has long been aware of the sincere attachment which exists between Lord Auckland and his amiable Sisters, and of his anxiety for their Welfare and happiness, and he gives him credit for this exemplary feature of his character, not less than He does for the ability and correct zeal with which he has discharged his Public Duties.

Lord Auckland's conduct at the Admiralty has indeed been so satisfactory to the King, that it is impossible He should not regret his Removal from that Department, though His Majesty trusts that the Interests of the Country have been consulted in his nomination to the high and important Situation of Governor-General of India, and sincerely hopes that it may conduce to his own advantage and satisfaction.

His Majesty is not surprised that Miss Eden and her Sister should have determined to accompany so affectionate a Brother even to so remote a destination, and He is sensible how much their Society must contribute to his comfort, for the uninterrupted continuance of which, and of their welfare, He a.s.sures them of His best Wishes.

WILLIAM R.