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True, but I didn't care. Besides, I'd had worse headaches. Perhaps I should have been grateful he was concerned about me, but I wasn't. I wanted to prove my worth and I didn't want him s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g it up. So I ignored the pain and I tried to ignore Lewis.
I took in a deep breath, gritted my teeth and with an internal roar, I pushed as hard as I could. The pressure gave way instantly. The shock moved from my body and I was left cold, alone in my steel room. For a moment it felt as if I floated. Then I heard the cry. Not in my mind, but outside my body. Shocked, I jerked from my dreamland and dove back into cold reality.
I opened my eyes, my breathing harsh. The room wavered in and out of focus. For a brief moment, I wasn't sure where I was; I wasn't even sure who I was. There was a movement across from me and it all came rushing back.
Aaron lay on his back, staring up at me with wide, unblinking eyes. His face was pale, sweaty. For a horrifying moment I thought he was dead.
"My G.o.d," he whispered. "That was..."
"I'm sorry." I crawled toward him, my body too weak to walk. "Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry."
He laughed, sitting upright. "No. Don't be sorry." He paused for one long moment, breathing as harshly as I was. "That was unbelievable. I wasn't using full strength, but close."
Tucking his feet underneath him, he stood, his body trembling with the movement. I jumped to my feet, searching the dark room for Lewis. He stood back in the shadows, his face unreadable.
"Seriously, I'm so sorry," I said, hoping he believed me.
"Don't be. Are you kidding? That was amazing." Aaron looked at Lewis, but Lewis was looking toward the windows. "Did you see that?"
"How much did it hurt?" Lewis asked, ignoring Aaron and glancing back at me.
I pressed my hands to my temples. They were thumping slightly, but it wasn't unbearable. The numbness in my body had given way to an odd shimmering current. "I'm okay. Just a slight headache." Is that why he was frowning?
"You sure you're okay?" he asked.
Aaron laughed and thumped Lewis on the back. "She's fine, in fact, she's great."
He clasped my shoulders. "I knew it; I knew you'd be just like your father."
Shockingly, he pulled me close for a tight hug. Although I should have been embarra.s.sed, I liked his affection, craved the attention like some pathetic druggie.
I sank into his body. And I wanted to be thrilled, I should have been thrilled, but when I looked over Aaron's shoulder, I saw that Lewis was still frowning.
Was he jealous? Worried? Or was there something more to that dour look?
Chapter 12.
The drive to town seemed to take forever, every moment lasting an eternity. I wasn't sure what to talk about and apparently neither was Lewis as we remained awkwardly silent. I still had a little bit of a headache, but the thrill of being on a date overrode the pain and I didn't want to be home right now.
"You're doing really well, Cam," Lewis said, finally breaking the silence.
I smiled, but I didn't want to talk about my abilities or lack thereof. Besides, if I was doing so well, why had he looked so dour after I'd thrown Aaron on his b.u.t.t? "Thanks."
No, I didn't want to talk about me, and I didn't want to talk about Lewis's odd reaction. I couldn't stand the thought that he might be jealous of my powers. There was only one thing I wanted to know about and that was Lewis himself. I wasn't sure where he'd come from, who his family was, nothing. Of course I couldn't read his mind, so that didn't help.
"Headache?"
"Huh?"
He looked pointedly at me and I realized I'd been rubbing my temples. I lowered my hands to my lap. "Maybe a little."
He shrugged, slowing the car as we entered town. The street lights flashed across his face. Was it my imagination or did he look a little pale? "When I first learned how to block my thoughts I'd get headaches."
My interest piqued. I knew Aaron had taken him in, but at what age had he started training? "Oh, yeah?"
"It will get better soon." He stopped in front of a large Victorian inn and restaurant. The place was glowing with lamplight, behind it the setting sun sent brilliant orange rays across the bay. It was gorgeous. Romantic. So, why was I suddenly uneasy to be here with him?
Because while stepping out of the car, the cool night air tugging at my hair and the skirt of my dress, I remembered this was a date...a real date. I hadn't been on a date in forever. During my junior year, I'd started going out with my first real boyfriend. A month later, when he'd realized he wasn't going to get laid, I'd heard he was going to dump me. So I dumped him first. To be honest, I'd only gone out with him so I could double date with Emily. But it still stung. Now...my G.o.d, now I was on a date with a guy who actually liked me. Then again, if what Olivia said was true, he only liked me for now...until the next woman came along.
His warm hand rested at the small of my back as we made our way up the wide wooden steps to the restaurant. Only a few people were in the building, most tourists having gone to dry land for the winter season. The inside lobby had a large antique desk. Flowered wallpaper decorated the walls and a golden chandelier dangled from above. Yep, definitely a date.
"Lewis!" A gorgeous hostess wearing a short black skirt rushed forward with a ready smile on her face. Startled, I stepped aside. She gave Lewis a tight hug and Olivia's annoying comment came roaring back.
You think you're the first one Lewis has led on?
I stood there awkwardly as they talked about where Lewis had been. He brushed off her comment with an answer about visiting friends on the mainland. I had to resist the urge to push myself between them and say, "Here I am!"
It seemed like an eternity before he finally looked at me. "This is Cameron." He took my hand, pulling me forward.
She seemed sincere when she smiled and her kindness made me feel somewhat better. It didn't last. "You want your usual table?"
Usual? In that he came here often... with other girls? This date was quickly turning into a nightmare and the worst part was that I knew I was being ridiculous.
"Yeah, near the windows."
He led me toward the back of the restaurant, a large open area that had obviously been added onto the building at a later date. He was still smiling, completely oblivious to the fact that I'd turned into a silly, jealous girl. And I was being silly, I knew that, but I couldn't seem to stop myself. He pulled out a chair for me, the perfect gentleman. The chatter in the room was a soft murmur that I barely heard, I was too intent on knowing what Lewis was thinking, secretly hoping his wall would slip and a thought would seep out. I know, I was pathetic.
"I love this spot," he said. "You can see the bay, the boats coming in, the sun setting. Perfect."
"Yeah." I swallowed hard and looked out the large floor to ceiling windows, but the beauty of nature was completely lost on me. "You come here often then?"
He shrugged, unconcerned by my question. "There aren't many other places to go on the island."
I suppose he was right. But Olivia's comment was still there, taunting me. Why was I letting her get to me? But I knew why, because deep down I couldn't believe that someone like Lewis would really like me. G.o.d, I was no better than Annabeth. I'd been playing second fiddle to Emily for way too long. It had destroyed my self-confidence.
An older woman dressed in black with a white ap.r.o.n took our orders, leaving us with a basket of bread. The moment she left, Lewis leaned across the table.
"So," he said, staring at me intently. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," I replied a little too quickly.
He nodded slowly, but I could see he had his misgivings. "You sure?"
I unfolded the white napkin wrapped around my silverware. "Yeah, fine." I laughed, but it came out sounding a little manic. Olivia had turned me into a crazy woman, which is probably what she was hoping to do. "Where's your family?"
He blinked, surprised by the sudden change in topic. Good, I wanted to catch him off guard. "Ummm, dead."
I wanted to sink to the floor with mortification. I was such an idiot. "I'm so sorry."
He shrugged and looked out the windows again. "I was young, it's been a long time."
I played with my cloth napkin, heat rushing to my cheeks. I'd never felt more horrible, yet I had this odd, totally inhumane desire to ask more. I felt this frantic need to know everything I could about him. Maybe not everything, just his deepest darkest secrets. I guess I hoped the more I knew, the closer we'd be. "How'd it happen?"
He looked at the wooden tabletop, taking his own napkin and placing it on his lap. He didn't say a word and didn't look like he wanted to speak. His reaction left me cold.
"You don't have to talk about it. I'm sorry I brought it up."
He shook his head. "No, it's just..." He looked at me, his gaze so warm and intense that my heart skipped a beat. Yet there, in the back of his eyes, lurked something more... secrecy.
"What?" I asked.
"It happened the same time your father died."
I hadn't been expecting that and for one long moment I merely stared at him, wondering if I'd misheard. "How?" I whispered.
He lifted his gla.s.s of water. Your father, my parents were being used. They didn't want to be used anymore. They decided to break out of the S.P.I. encampment, along with a few other people. Our parents didn't make it.
Why did I have a feeling there was more to this story? More he wasn't going to tell me at the moment? But why would Lewis keep secrets from me?
He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Don't worry about it, okay? We're protected. Safe. They can't get to us."
"But where have you lived all this time?"
He sighed, realizing I wasn't going to shut up. I probably should have, but I couldn't help myself. "First with an uncle, then when he died, Aaron came for me. I was eight when I moved here."
"You've been here since you were eight?" He nodded and I continued with my third degree. "What about schooling?"
"I home schooled."
It sounded lonely to me, stuck on this island as a child. "And college?"
He shrugged. "Why go to school when I have the ability that I have?"
I didn't see what reading minds had to do with college and getting a decent job, but was waylaid from asking more when the waitress arrived with our plates. On the way to the restaurant I'd been starving, now I could barely think of food. There were too many thoughts, too many questions rushing through my head. But foremost was the fact that our parents had died together. We were like some sort of weird retelling of Romeo and Juliet in which we survived and our families died. I could certainly understand Lewis' need to see S.P.I. pay for what they'd done. Although I hadn't truly known my father, even I felt the need to avenge his memory.
I lapsed into silence as we ate our food. As ridiculous as it sounded, I couldn't help but wonder if we were destined to be together. I felt connected to Lewis like I had with no other. But did he feel the same way? Or was I just another girl in a long line, as Olivia implied.
"Lewis!" As if the Universe was playing some cruel prank on me, a young woman came rushing toward us. She didn't have trouble walking in her high heels and slinky black dress. Her hair was as red as the lipstick she wore. Lewis stood as she reached the table. He didn't look ashamed or embarra.s.sed when she threw her arms around him. He sure as heck didn't push her away, as I'd been hoping.
"When did you get back?" she asked.
"Few days ago."
She pulled away, not bothering to glance at me. "Thank G.o.d, it's been so boring with you gone."
Heat slowly burned my cheeks as realization dawned. While I'd lived on the mainland, wasting away because no one understood me, Lewis had been perfectly happy here. He had friends and a life, while I'd been living this pathetic half-existence. It didn't seem quite fair.
"Call me soon," she said. "We need to go out."
"Sure." Lewis settled back in his chair and the girl flounced away. He hadn't even introduced me. I dragged my fork through my rice, staring hard at my plate. I would not cry. I was being irrational, ridiculous. I refused to be another Emily.
He slid me a glance. "You're thinking something again, something I can't hear, but I can see it on your face."
I forced myself to laugh. "No, nothing."
He was silent for a moment, so silent that I worried about what he was planning next. "I don't date a lot. I don't come here with a long line of women."
The blood drained from my face. I felt cold. Then just as quickly, heated embarra.s.sment rushed through my body. "I...how'd you know?"
"Your thoughts-"
"You said you weren't reading my thoughts!" I realized I said that a little too loudly and glanced around to make sure we hadn't been overhead.
"I stopped blocking when I thought you were controlling yours. But they're slipping through your defense." He seemed frustrated, disappointed in me.
Well, screw him. I started to stand, embarra.s.sed, humiliated. "I'm leaving."
"What?" Unbelievable. Why are girls so irrational?
I froze, shocked by the sudden invasion of his thoughts into mine. My G.o.d, did he even realize his thought had slipped out? The question quickly gave rise to the realization that he thought I was irrational. I'd had to watch him practically make out in front of me with two other girls and he was annoyed with me?
I tossed my napkin to the tabletop and pushed open the closest door. I found myself on a boardwalk that led to the beach. The air was chill, the wind bitter. I'd freeze out here, but couldn't seem to care at the moment. My heels sank into the sand as I made my way to the sh.o.r.e. Too much. It was all too much, too soon.
"Cameron!" Lewis was coming after me.
I didn't want him to. I wanted to be alone. I wanted...I didn't know what I wanted. I sank onto the sand, pulled my legs to my chest and rested my head on my knees. A tear slipped down my cheek, then another and another. G.o.d, I was crying and I couldn't seem to stop. It was supposed to be on the perfect date. But then Olivia had ruined it, and those girls had hugged Lewis, making me doubt him. He'd practically ignored me. The worst part was realizing that my dad...his parents...they'd been murdered together. Knowing the facts made it too real, all too...real.
My dad had died.
"Cam," Lewis settled beside me, his body touching mine. He was warm and I had to resist the urge to sink into him. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I don't know." I stared at the sand, too embarra.s.sed to look up at him.
I didn't know how to explain my tears because I wasn't sure why I was crying. He'd think I was insane...then again he probably already did. I took in a deep breath and lifted my head, staring at the ocean. The sun had almost set, the water growing dark. He couldn't read my features, couldn't see the tears. The darkness gave me courage. I closed my eyes and opened my mind, taking down that steel wall Aaron had taught me to build.
My dad is dead. I'm afraid of my powers. What if Lewis is using me?
The thoughts tumbled from my mind, into the dark world, into his mind. I felt his body stiffen. I knew he'd heard my thoughts and for a moment I regretted being so open. I sniffed and turned my face away, too embarra.s.sed to look at him directly.
Lewis was silent for a long moment. He didn't say a word, nor did he open his mind to me. I closed my eyes and closed my mind. I'd told him what he needed to hear. No need to let him know how utterly humiliated I was at the moment.
"I guess it's normal," he finally said, "for you to be afraid. It's all new to you. You didn't realize what you were capable of."