Marielle Clarac’s Engagement 003.1

Recently, Simon-sama is strange.

“Ojou-sama, it arrived today as well”

The maid Natalie, came carrying a rose in her hand.

“Are there any verbal message and letters?”

“No…...I’m sorry”

“Really. It’s okay, thank you.”

I accepted the rose and took it out from its protective wrap made of paper and threw it inside the vase that was on the table. Several roses of the same deep red were arranged there. The roses conditions’ are varied; from those that are still budding to those that were near its blooming, to those that ended up already perfectly opened.

“......I wonder if this is already hopeless”

I pa.s.sed the flowers of best season and touched the ones which were open to the point its shape was broken. That stimulus made several petals move and fall down.

“It's better if we change the water. We’ll continue to arrange them”

Natalie held the vase and took it out. I sighed as I saw her off.

How many days has pa.s.sed since I haven't seen Simon-sama’s face? It was since that evening party; and if I wasn’t invited, we couldn’t meet. Not even a letter came. But everyday, these roses arrived instead.

I wonder if he’s so busy with work that he can’t take some time off? But then again, it would be good if accompanied with something like a message. Simon-sama is someone with integrity so, I can't think that he would leave it like this without saying anything.

......As I thought, I wonder if he exhausted his courtesy.

While thinking about it, my chest become heavily oppressed.

That day when the residence of Duke Braquere’s was opened for the evening party, I knew that Simon-sama was working, so I went without saying anything. Even if I saw him at the venue, since he was accompanying His Highness Sevran, I went away so as to not get in the way.

If I become the fiancé of an Imperial Guard that is greatly trusted by His Highness the Crown Prince then, that kind of thing will continue for as long as it could be, right. I didn't think of it as a big deal; and since it had been a while, I intended to endeavour in news-collecting.

But, it seems that it didn’t work. The Simon-sama who’d found me, had a sullen looking smile that hanged in the air.

Even though I was engaged, I went to enjoy myself alone. He might ended up thinking that I have no modesty, right. When Simon-sama was being forceful and in an irritated state, I got scared and ended up running away in a hurry after greeting His Highness.

After that, he neither tried to talk to me nor let me talk to him. It finished with us staying apart like this. With that, until today I still haven't met with Simon-sama.

Perhaps, he got really angry over that. He must have gotten shocked by a prodigal girl that neglected her fiancé and went to play alone, right.

I can’t deny it ne…..It was certainly a little thoughtless, probably.

If it's a tolerant gentleman then if the wife willfully went out, he wouldn’t say that she’s being noisy; but the old-fashioned side and the hard-to-please side wouldn't so easily pardoned you. Couples are expected to go out while accompanied by each other. A wife that doesn't go out much isn’t uncommon.

Surely, Simon-sama was also that kind of person. Since we’re engaged, he gave me the same treatment towards a wife, observing my action. Nevertheless, I went out without permission, so I guess he got angry.

At least, it would’ve been good to consult with him first. Going without notice was inappropriate. If I think about my careless blunder, I can't stop sighing.

Aaーh…...I wonder if I missed the greatest fortune that come only once in an entire lifetime.

It’s not like he announced the cancellation of the engagement as of yet. But it's nearly a month since then, and I hadn’t received a letter to meet with him. I wonder if I should think of a sudden breaking off the engagement situation.

Natalie returned back with the vase having only the pretty flowers and unsightly flowers plucked after the water were changed. The petals were velvety and possessed gracefulness, it was a rose with a pa.s.sionate deep crimson colour. It is said to be the most suitable flower to convey affection, but to me it holds a completely different meaning.

Without announcing anything, he delivers a flower everyday, but it’s not like he hadn't wrote something. That episode, frightfully, I might have an idea about it.

Simon-sama did said he have read the novels written by Agnes• Vivier. There’s no mistake, he is imitating that story. The reason he is going through all this trouble to show it to me, it’s none other than to convey the silent message that he knows everything.

The heroine of that story was toyed with bewilderment and throbbing while not knowing who gifted her those roses. However, Simon-sama sent them by clearly giving out his name. Cornering me without showing his figure as it is, he didn’t pointlessly tried to conceal it to me. Every day, every time I see a rose, my mood becomes heavier.

“Haa…..I can’t go moe”

Resting my chin on my hand in front of the vase, my shoulders dropped. Even if Simon-sama came in front of me and criticized me with that powerful smile of his, I would still be able to go moe. I haven’t seen the figure of the person in question, it's unbelievable that he is just investigating me.

There’s no more doubt already. Simon-sama is already convinced about the fact that I am Agnes • Vivier. That's surely the cause of his anger, right.

But he must have had no evidence. Even if he seek information at the publisher company, they don't disclose the author’s personal information. If you were to forcefully ask with your authority, then you’ll be asked for the reason. If you say that it may be your fiancé, you'll be put to shame. If it were to be a person that held displeasure towards the popular novel then, they would absolutely not tell you, right.

So as to not shower me with shame with a disturbance, I think he is inducing me to confess by myself. By persistently sending me a rose everyday, he is waiting for when I won’t be able to endure it anymore. I am being slowly driven to the edge of a cliff, while from outsider’s perspective he looked like the ideal fiancé who wanted to convey his affection everyday.

As expected from the demon-like vice captain, I admire him but, the problem is that from this problem I can’t go moe.

Uhn, I wonder if I should give up already? It was a story that wasn’t balanced from the start. Even though I was able to get engaged, that kind of miracle was a mistake, and the thought of reaching the marriage stage as we are, is impudent.

If Simon-sama has given up on me then, there’s no meaning on struggling uselessly. Even if I continue to remain like this, in the meantime he will attach some reason to break off the engagement, right. With just the case of the evening party too, it’s plenty of a reason to cancel the engagement.

If I don’t clearly state it now, it will surely be the last act of kindness from Simon-sama. If the opposite party announced the cancellation, then the entire society would know that I have some problems and shovel me with shame. That’s why I should think of a good excuse to pull out myself.

It’s a great deal of consideration. It’s very, very regrettable but I’ll give up. Even if right now I can’t be beside him, I can always take a peek of him from far away. Isn’t that fine. It was short, but I received a lot of beautiful memories. Especially that time when I intruded on the Knight Order’s Headquarter!

The Simon-sama was equipped with a whip that I saw only in my dreams!

That was excellent…….that dangerous smell that was hidden inside that gentleness, the devilish element of a beautiful black belly!

That thing was exactly a sight for sore eyes, thank you for the meal!

When I closed my eyes and recalled that supreme bliss of a scene, I was immersed with enthusiasm. Un, with that memory alone I can write a book. That’s enough. Let’s think that I received a good dream. Father will surely give his consent. Everyone here thought that it was an impossible engagement.

I covered the frizzling ache that tinged my chest, and fetched some writing paper. I’ve been afraid of Simon-sama since the evening party, and I also hesitated to contact him. But, I was also getting angry. Running the pen on the paper, I wrote a letter to Simon-sama.

Because of my carelessness I disappointed you. I’m truly sorry, and I understand my own standing. I will accept the negotiation for the withdrawal of the engagement…...but I won’t write about my writer activity ne. Unless he grasped some evidence, I absolutely won’t say it. However, I’ll transmit my resignation. Simon-sama will be satisfied right.

After carefully choosing the words, I reread and corrected the letter a number of time. I firmly sealed the clean copy of the letter and entrusted it to a servant. I told him to deliver it to the Flaubert house, and as I ascertained that he went out, I suddenly felt somewhat disappointed.

Aーah…...it’s the end.

There will be a lot of rumors for a while again. Wherever the place I will go to, I would become a laughing stock; and Aurelisama and the other will come here with a state of triumph to say their sarcastic remark, right. This and that will be used for references so they are very welcomed but, my energy strangely won’t come out. Considering the differences between me and Simon-sama, it seemed like this engagement was a dream or an illusion. Even though I woke up and returned to reality, surprisingly, it looks like I am heartbroken.

Not good, not good. I can’t remain depressed forever, nothing will change.

I quickly dressed and left the mansion. I didn’t took Natalie with me and went by foot without preparing a carriage. Because if I walk just a little, vehicles will pa.s.s on the street and I’ll be able to find a pa.s.sing horse-drawn carriage.

As a n.o.blewoman - and moreover an unmarried girl - this way of going out is something that shouldn't happen. Because you will be talked about as a libertine.  ――but, my family employees doesn’t mind.

But if I walked alone with a commoner attire then, without a doubt no one would pay attention to me anyway. They would think that I am a servant from some House that went out for an errand, right. If I went to the town, I would look exactly like the people in the surroundings. If I ended up completely slipping inside, even my family wouldn’t find me.

The me now, no matter how you look at it I look at it, is a girl from middle-cla.s.s society. While wearing the same colored bonnet hat in a pale cream-colored dress with little ornament, I sweep the stone pavement with my short knitted shoe. Different from when I went out in n.o.ble society, right now I’m walking with big strides. I bought chocolate crépe and roasted chestnuts at Chardin Plaza and walked along the riverside of Latour River. Extending my pace ‘till I reached the marketplace is good; and going to see the trading company and newspaper company that stand in line is also good. I didn’t see any aristocrat of a n.o.ble society coming and going, I observed the people that arrived and the atmosphere of the street. While I was at it, I dropped by the publisher company, it may be good to do a business meeting for my next work.

If I return to focus on novel in the same manner as before then, I’ll be able to to forget about both the engagement and Simon-sama. I’ll go back to be the former me.

Thinking about the bright turning point, my mood become a little bit lighter. When I caught a horse drawn carriage which I called to a halt, I went to the town where fall dispatched deeply.

Tn: Naoriel

Ed: Ally-el & Riel

《Nao's little corner》

I feel like I heard Simon's scream just now.