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When I woke up the next morning Matt wasn't beside me. It was shocking but I was kind of glad that he wasn't there. It was eleven so Cody would already be at work. I took a shower, pulled my hair into a sloppy bun and grabbed my backpack. I had a writing a.s.signment due next week and I hadn't started.
I didn't really need to go to the library but I went anyway, just to get out of the apartment. I fought the urge to walk over to Liam's apartment. I didn't think I needed to see him so soon. I wasn't that kind of girl. I couldn't believe my lack of self-control. I was sure everyone would hate me if they knew I was interested in my teacher.
I rolled down my windows and let the wind numb me on the way to the library. After driving around for ten minutes, I caught a car pulling out of the library parking lot. I slid in after him. The library was deserted, so I grabbed a table on the second floor. I pulled out my notebook and started writing. I loved to write, but sometimes I would get carried away. Before I knew what I was doing, I had described Liam perfectly on paper. I bit my lip and started to tear the paper. "No," I whispered to myself. "No one would know. My teacher would be the only person reading, and it wasn't like she would piece my hero of the story to Liam.
I continued writing, describing his gray eyes, the freckle on his chin, the strong line of his jaw. Thirty minutes later, I had a short (fictional) story written about a girl seriously attracted to this guy. I almost laughed at myself. This is pathetic.
"Hi, Sarah," I heard from in front of me. I looked up at Ms. Shay. She was giving me this small smile, gesturing toward the chair across from me. Really? You can't find one more seat in the d.a.m.ned empty library?
"Sure," I said, turning the page so that she didn't see anything and piece them together.
"How are you?" she asked, still staring at me.
I glance up at her brown eyes, they were narrowed. "Fine, you?"
"Great. Are you okay from last night? You seemed...fl.u.s.tered when I came into the bathroom. What happened?"
None of your d.a.m.ned business. Of course I couldn't say that to a teacher. "My boyfriend broke up with me," I blurted out. It was the first thing that came to my mind.
I tugged on the end of my blonde ponytail. "So sorry," she said, biting her lip. Yeah, you look really sorry.
"Thanks," I mumbled, chewing on the end of my pen.
"Look, Sarah. We need to cut the c.r.a.p, okay? I'm sorry that your boyfriend broke up with you, but I know you like Liam. I can see the way you look at him."
I fought the urge to let my eyes widened. Instead, I c.o.c.ked an eyebrow and tilted my head to the side. "He's my teacher, Ms. Shay. What are you insinuating?"
I heard her grit her teeth from the other side of the table. Her fingers were wrapped tightly around some book and her chin tilted into the air. "Don't play coy with me, Ms. Thomas. I know he's young. I know he's good-looking, and I know you're after him. Don't let me catch you alone with him again. Or I'll sing like a canary."
My jaw almost fell to the floor. "Don't know what you're talking about, but I would appreciate if you left me alone. I have things to do," I said, pointing toward my paper.
She glanced down and back up at me. She stood, hovering over the seat, watching me intently. This woman in a f.u.c.king freak.
"Hey, babe," I hear from behind me. I glanced over my shoulder at Matt, walking toward me.
Ms. Shay smiled. "Really looks like he broke up with you last night, huh, Ms. Thomas." She then turned on her heel, her red ponytail swinging and walked away.
"Broke up with you?" Matt asked, taking a seat beside me. His black eyebrows were pulled down and he was frowning.
"I have no idea what she was talking about. I heard she was crazy." I spun a circle around my temple with my finger.
He smiled. "They'll hire anyone these days. So, what'd you do last night?"
"Went out with Cody to Monroe. We danced."
"Did any guys flirt with you?" he asked. I don't know why he always asked that, it wasn't like he would go track down the guys and beat the h.e.l.l out of them. And plus, the only guy really on me was Liam.
"Nope," I lied.
He nodded and fidgeted with his phone. It had started buzzing a few seconds before but he didn't answer it. "You gonna get that?"
He shook his head. "Nah, it's not important. But, hey, you know we have that baseball dance coming up. You wanna go?"
Not really. "Yeah, sure. When is it, next week?"
He nodded. "Yeah, you'll have to have a dress."
I nodded. "I'll get one."
"Okay," he said, standing up. I saw his fingers tighten around his cellphone but I didn't ask. "I'm going to head over to Tyler's apartment."
"Okay, hey, did you hear about Tyler going out with Jamie? He said she started out really weird. I wonder what's wrong with her?"
Matt's jaw tightened. "When?"
"Last night. She won't talk to me either. I don't know what the h.e.l.l is going on with her."
Matt gave me a small smile. "Don't worry about it." He kissed my forehead. "It's probably nothing."
He ran down the stairs and disappeared. I figured I'd had enough excitement for one day and went home.
Chapter Eight.
Liam Shay had called me several times over the weekend. I didn't answer. I was sure I'd see or hear from her Monday at school but I didn't feel like making any more excuses to her. I didn't like her, I wanted something I couldn't have. Of course.
Layla and I took a run at the lake, and I tossed her toy into the waves from the boats pa.s.sing by. It was peaceful, Sarah had been right. I hadn't heard from her since that Friday. It was Sunday and I wanted so bad to just go over to her apartment, but I wasn't sure who all was there.
Layla brought her bone back to me, and I tossed it out further. What would happen if Matt opened the door? He already suspected me. Would he pick a fight? I wasn't scared, I could hold my own. Or would he go and tell? I'd lose my job for sure. It was in the handbook about student/teacher relationships. It was against the rules, and I wanted to break them over and over again.
Layla trotted back up to me and flopped on the dirt. She was tired. I patted her head and walked over toward the truck. I heard the faint sound of my cell phone ringing. Dad's name popped up. I was sure it was my mom again.
"h.e.l.lo," I said.
"Hey, son," Dad said. My heart began to beat even faster. What did he want? He'd already told me everything he needed before I left.
"What's going on?" I asked, leaning against the seats.
"Just checking in on you. Is everything alright?"
I nodded but remembered he couldn't see me. "Yes, sir. Everything is fine." Why are you really calling?
"I wanted to check in, because your mother and I are coming down next weekend. We wanted to make sure you were free. You don't have any plans?" He laughed but it was bitter. "We both know you don't have anything serious, because woman aren't after teachers."
Anger rose in my throat. That was another lame excuse for a reason not to teach, in his eyes. The only thing women want was a hardcore military man. Bulls.h.i.t. Sarah would disagree with him. But, Sarah isn't mine.
"Actually, I do have plans. But, I can break them."
Dad was silent for a moment. "Oh, really? Why don't you bring her to meet us then? We'll get to know your new squeeze."
My head began to spin. How can I get out of this? There wasn't anything I could think of. "Okay, we'll be ready." I hung up the phone and tossed it in my truck. What a f.u.c.king d.i.c.k.
I patted the seat and Layla jumped in and over into the pa.s.senger's seat. I started the truck and spun out of the lake. I only had three options and all three were risky. I could call and cancel, but Dad would know I was lying. I could ask Shay to go, but I didn't want to lead her on. Or, what I wanted, was to bring Sarah with me. Show her off to my dad. But that could get me fired or in jail.
"f.u.c.k. Way to go, Liam."
Sarah Liam was perched on his desk when I walked in ten minutes early. His head snapped toward mine and blood rushed to my cheeks. G.o.d, I hope he can't tell I'm blushing.
"Hey," he said, sliding off his desk. I groaned because he looked utterly delicious. "You're early."
I nodded and played with the strap on my bag. "Ms. Shay knows," I said.
"Knows..." Liam trailed off into silence. "s.h.i.t," he mumbled, running his hand over his face. "What did she say? How do you know she knows?"
I gave him a quick recap. "She is creepy as f.u.c.k," I said.
He laughed. "Well, she has no proof. So, that's good." He smiled down at me and I returned a half-hearted one. I hadn't said what I needed to say yet, because I was chicken s.h.i.t. "Why do I get the feeling you have something else to tell me?"
s.h.i.t. "Um," I mumbled. "See, I think that we need to cool it. First off, I have a boyfriend. I'm not sure what I'm doing. I don't know why I'm feeling this way, and I'm confused. Secondly, it's against the rules and you could get fired. Thirdly, we have someone on to us."
Liam's face was unreadable. I wanted to grab him and shake some words from his mouth. G.o.d, his mouth. Stop, Sarah.
"You're one hundred percent right, Sarah." He nodded, looking at the ground. "We do need to stop. But, I'm not sure I can."
b.u.t.terflies started to dance in my stomach. "But, I'll try. If you do something for me."
I swallowed a large lump in my throat. "What is it?"
"It's kind of a long story. But, my parents are coming down this weekend. And I kind of lied and said I had a girlfriend. My dad doesn't approve of me teaching and doesn't think women will be attracted to me because of it."
Has he looked at his son? Every woman in her right mind would want him. "Okay..."
"I want you to pretend, just for one night, to be my girlfriend. Please."
How in the h.e.l.l was I supposed to say no to that? His eyes were hopeful and he was biting on his bottom lip. "Sure. But, what if someone sees us?"
He shook his head. "They won't. We'll go out of town to eat. Does that sound okay? I really appreciate it, Sarah." He reached over and touched my cheek. I leaned into the feeling but before I could appreciate it, he pulled away.
Disappoint sat in. But it was the right thing to do, I think. I sighed, and walked over to my seat.
Liam barely looked at me during cla.s.s. We reviewed for our map test Wednesday and then I went out to work study.
Cody was waiting on me, two Sonic cups in his hand. "One strawberry slushy for you," he said, handing me the drink.
I took a large gulp and closed my eyes. Heaven. "So, how did cla.s.s go?" he asked, sucking on his straw.
I eyed him and shook my head. "I told him that we needed to cool it and he said okay. Then he asked if I could pretend to be his girlfriend when his parents came down."
Cody chocked on his straw. "No f.u.c.king way," he said laughing. "That should go over well, what did you say?"
"I said yes. Because, I'm a sucker for him. I wanted to pounce on him during cla.s.s. Something is wrong with me."
Cody smiled. "Something would be wrong with you if you didn't want to pounce on the man, Sarah. You had a connection before you found out he was your teacher. Now you are both attracted to each other, you kissed, and done other things. Now, it's hard to let that connection go. It's simple math, Sarah. Hot plus hot, and chemistry plus chemistry equals something beautiful."
I snickered behind my hand. "You should write Hallmark cards."
"Laugh all you want, I'm going to be famous at something one day. I just don't know what yet."
"I'm sure you will be--," I trailed off when I heard someone shout outside the hallway door. 'What in the h.e.l.l?" I asked.
"I'll go see," Cody said, walking over to the door. His mouth screwed up in a hard to read expression. "Come here," he mouthed, motioning me toward the door.
I walked over and saw Matt and Jamie arguing in the hallway. He was pointing his finger in her face and she was on the verge of tears. "What are y'all doing?" I busted out, hands on my hips.
They both turned to me at the same time. Jamie pressed her mouth into a thin line and Matt smiled. "Hey, baby. Sorry..." he trailed off, clearly trying to think of something to say, "I'm just talking to Jamie about Tyler."
'What about him?" I asked, irritated at the people watching us.
"She was just concerned if he was serious about them or not. I was just making sure she understood."
I narrowed my eyes. "Why haven't you answered me back yet? I've text you ten times Jamie."
She shrugged and pulled at her hair. "I've been busy. Sorry, I have to go." She turned around and ran down the hallway.
Matt shrugged, walked over kissed my forehead and said, "I'm going to baseball practice, I'll see ya tonight."
I waited until he disappeared down the hallway before looking at Cody. "What the f.u.c.k was that about?" he asked.
"I have no idea."
"Excuse me would you look over my essay?" someone asked from behind me. I watched down the empty hallway and grabbed their paper.
"Sure."
Chapter Nine.