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But he would have one kiss first, before he broke her heart.
"Sweeting..." he breathed, cupping her chin in his hand and lowering his head to claim the kiss that would have to last him for the rest of his life.
She smelled of lilies. Her lips were warm and soft, and sweeter than any mead ever distilled. He brushed them with his lips once, a kiss as tender as one they might have exchanged as children, then with more pressure, caressing her mouth with his.
Aldyth kissed like the untouched maiden she was, but with an innocent enthusiasm, sighing with obvious delight.
She was so fragile, so sweet. he wanted the kiss to go on forever.
He longed to go down on one knee fight now and beg her to wed him. But he could not.
He raised his head, and when he opened his eyes, she was gazing at him rapturously.
"Ranulf--you do remember You do still love me!" He must not put it off any longer. He gave her a lazy smile.
"Who would not love lips like those, my pet? I would have more of them..."
His hands framed her cheeks as his mouth covered hers hungrily, the pressure of his lips forcing her mouth open so his tongue could ravish hers. She did not resist but trustingly allowed the kiss to deepen. He could feel her heart--the heart he must break--racing like a doe bounding through a wood.
His hands left her face and descended to her shoulders, pulling her more closely against him as his lips rained kisses on her cheeks and her neck. He felt her hands steal round his neck, one of them stroking through his long hair. He did not feign his shiver.
"Ah, my lovely one, your mouth tastes of honey," he murmured against her throat as she arched her neck backward to receive more of his kisses. Her breath came as raggedly as his own.
Ranulf's hand strayed as if by accident down her throat and past her collarbone, cupping her firm young breast, kneading it as his mouth plundered hers once more. He mentally braced himself, sure she would begin to struggle now, certain she must become frightened and beg him to stop at any moment.
She did not, even when his thumb grazed her nipple and began to circle it.
He felt it grow pebble-hard.
Clearly her ideal of saving his soul made her willing to go on, to brave the danger of arousing a man who was known to satisfy his carnal appet.i.tes as casually as he would eat an apple.
He was amazed not only that she hadn't pulled away but that she had aroused him so quickly. Not all the courtesans at court, with their tricks and wiles, could have made him this hard, this ready. He wanted her. The tightening in his groin had already accelerated into an aching need.
It was not that he had been long without a woman. He had bedded a complaisant serving wench at an alehouse only the night before he had arrived at Kingsclere. It was, he realized with heart-wrenching certainty, because the girl within his arms was Aldyth, whom he had never really stopped loving. But because he did love her, he thought with the tiny corner of his brain that remained cool and clear, he would not leave her with any romantic illusions about him. His other hand had been caress' rag her back, reveling in the supple curve of her spine beneath the fine wool, but now he dropped both hands to her b.u.t.tocks, splaying his fingers and pressing her against the evidence of his desire for her.
"Aldyth," he breathed, "feel how much I want you .... " He backed her the remaining few inches against the outside wall of the stall and thrust himself against her once, twice, three times, ignoring his palfrey's disturbed snorting. There. She had begun to be afraid now. Aldyth angled her hips away from his, seeking to avoid him, but she had nowhere to go.
She placed a hand against his chest, pushing softly but unmistakably at him.
"Ranulf, no, I..." Her eyes were glazed with newly awakened pa.s.sion, her face flushed.
He must be sure she saw him the way he wanted her to see him.
"You're right, sweeting. Not like this. Let us find an empty stall somewhere, where we can lie down and take our pleasure."
Inwardly he cringed, knowing he would never have chosen her first experience to be in the barn, even on the newest, freshest hay, where they could be discovered at any moment.
She pushed harder, staring up at him in the shadows. "No, my dear lord. You misunderstand. I would wait until our wedding night and come a maiden to our marriage bed."
Now he must do it, he realized with a sickening lurch in his stomach.
He must deliver the coup de grdce.
"Marriage?" he drawled, shrugging back into the persona of the debauched young n.o.ble as if it were a cloak.
"Who spoke of marriage?"
"Wh-why, I thought..." she began hesitantly.
"You thought I was looking to wed you? Surely you jest!" He laughed, the sound ringing cruelly in his own ears.
"I do not look to marry. Why should I? Nay, Aldyth, 'twas my mistake, evidently. I thought you wanted to give yourself to me, to be initiated in the joys of love by one who knows what he is doing!" He let his voice drop and become lazily caressing again.
"Surely you'll reconsider, my pretty vixen?"
He reached out and twisted a lock of chestnut hair around his finger.
"I swear by Saint Venus, love, I'd make it sweet for you. Once tried, I promise you you'd want more.
If you learn quickly enough, well, I might even take you back to court with me as my leman! "
Ranulf saw the tears well up and cursed the day he was horn.
"What of Vivienne, my lord? Surely she would mind sharing you."
He shrugged as if it need not matter.
"You thought I would go in a stall with you and let you do as you wished?"
she asked, her slender frame rigid with shock.
He shrugged.
"It wouldn't have been so unpleasant for you, my lovely Aldyth--especially after the first time. But if you're determined to find a proper bed, why not follow me in a few moments and steal up to my bedchamber? No one will be about at this time of day" -- "Is there no end to your arrogance, you conceited Norman magpie?" she cried.
"You think you can have any woman if you mix the honeyed words aright?"
He stared at her, regret mixed with relief that she was finally angry enough to hate him. Now to set the seal on her anger.
"I rather thought I was the realistic one, ma eh&re. After all, however much my father disapproves of me currently, I am the heir to his earldom. You are but the daughter of a English castellan. When I eventually marry, as I suppose I must someday, I can look considerably higher, you know.
And I was offering you quite a favor, as well. You're very sweet, Aldyth, but you kiss like a timid virgin. One night with me and we could remedy that, if you care to reconsider. "
She slapped him then, the sound ringing through the quiet stable.
"Do you see what I think of your kind offer, you-you braying Norman a.s.s?"
Aldyth would have run from the stable, but just then a figure appeared in the doorway and, seeing them, came forward.
It was G.o.dtic, and though Ranulf did not think he had seen their embrace or heard the heated words that followed, he was studying his sister's pale, tearful face and did not miss the disarray of her hair.
"Excuse me, Sir Ranulf." He bowed respectfully but the blue eyes that he trained on Ranulf were cold as shards of ice.