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"Wh-Where am I? Who are you? Why do you have pointy swords?"
An old man with a staff approached him. "Now, now. It's okay. Away with the pointy swords, the lot of you!" He addressed those behind him.
With a wave of his staff, the soldiers that were gathered in the room sheathed their weapons. That had only slightly calmed the traumatized boy. Understanding his fear, the old man bent down and offered his hand.
"My name is Magus Zelocus. You have been summoned to this world as its champion. May I ask of your name?"
"I-It's Rock."
"ALL HAIL, HERO ROCK!" Zelocus cheered in a loud voice. The soldiers followed in unison.
Rock wasn't sure how this had happened. He was just minding his own business not long ago.
Posting random gifs, making random statements on message boards, writing random bad poetry – the normal type of stuff when one gets bored. He popped online and then went to sleep whenever he felt like it, so people usually forgot all about him until he showed up.
He hated attention though, so he'd be gone pretty much as soon as he arrived. So, for there to be a large crowd of people chanting his name as their hero, it was quite the unsettling feeling.
"Please come, Hero Rock. Your destiny awaits."
Zelocus guided him forward, out of the summoning chamber and into a magnificent castle. It was the world of a gamer's dreams – breath-taking medieval architecture, fancily dressed n.o.bility and royalty, and awe-inspiring wielders of sword and magic.
Rock was introduced to the royal family themselves, who begged for him to go on a journey to gather faithful companions and claim the hero's rightful treasure from the G.o.ds, in order to fight against the Demon Lord.
Every RPG gamer was familiar with a plot like that, so Rock readily agreed, especially when the king offered the beautiful princess's hand in marriage and wealth for the rest of his life.
However, as Rock took one last look at the royal audience hall, he noticed something strange. There were several statues adorning the walls of either side. They were statues that appeared to be heroes, but each one was wielding a different weapon – Sword, Spear, Bow, Shield, Claw, Scythe, Mace, and many more.
The one thing that bothered Rock was that the statues appeared to be in disrepair, as if something had eroded them. That was the case for all, except for one – a statue in the very back corner of a hero who looked like he was in the middle of a fist pump.
"Eh? What's the story here? And why is that one, the only one in perfect condition?"
The king and Zelocus looked at each other with worry in their eyes. They weren't sure what to say. Finally, Zelocus was the one to speak.
"Hero Rock, it is better for us to be frank about our history. These statues that you see here are the legacy of the heroes that have been called before you. They are the ones who tried and failed to defeat the Demon Lord. As you can see, those ruined statues represent those that have fallen in battle."
"And th-that one?" Rock nervously pointed at the remaining pristine statue, getting a feeling of where this was headed.
"That is your statue, Hero Rock. You are our last hope."
"And you expect me to succeed when all the others have failed?" Rock gulped.
"We are prepared to offer you anything, anything that you desire, be it women, money or power. You truly are our last resort, and we will stop at nothing to ensure that this last gambit succeeds!" The King spoke up with a slight tremble. "The country is yours to command if you should desire."
"There's no way to send me back, is there?" Rock asked, feeling pressured by their desperate pleas.
"Unfortunately, the summoning cannot be undone," said Zelocus.
If there was no other option, Rock wouldn't mind being a King. Then, he could delegate and return to having a relaxing life once again. With a reluctant sigh, he agreed and set off on his journey.
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Months later.
Rock and his companions had finally made it to the Altar of the G.o.ds, where he could claim his legendary weapon. As expected, he had found trustworthy companions who had his back. He had slain hordes of evil beings as he went around saving the surrounding villages.
On the side, he was building up quite the bankroll and following from all the quests that he did. Certainly, he would be set for life once all of this was done with.
He just had to claim his legendary weapon, and then, defeat the final boss.
As he touched the pedestal at the top of the altar, a white light shone, and his consciousness was engulfed by it. His companions waited as their hero conversed with the G.o.ds.
Several minutes later, he returned to his party. Much to their surprise, it didn't look like he changed at all. They could not see any kind of legendary weapon equipped to him.
"Y-You got it, right? Your weapon from the G.o.ds," one of them asked.
"Of course. It's right here." Rock made an air pump gesture with his arm.
Somewhat confused, the party members shrugged it off and started walking down from the altar. Surprisingly, the old man who summoned Rock was waiting for them at the bottom.
"Zelocus? What are you doing all the way out here?"
"Checking on your status, Hero Rock, as part of my duties. I take it that you retrieved your weapon from the G.o.ds?"
"Yep, right here." Rock patted his arm.
"Excellent."
With a wave of his staff, Zelocus suddenly cast magic. Immediately, Rock's party members were knocked off their feet and were sent sprawling several feet away. Only Rock, who had the highest parameters, had held his ground.
"I thank you, Hero Rock! For provide me, Zelocus – faithful servant of the Demon Lord, with the final weapon of the G.o.ds! Now, his evilness will have the full might of the G.o.ds in his hands!" The old man cackled as he magically transformed into a young and powerful mage.
The magical aura that Zelocus was giving off was nothing to joke about. Especially, since he had blown away his entire party with his surprise attack.
"Sorry for fooling you, my unfortunate hero, but I must get rid of you before you harness the full power of your weapon. Since you are the last one, I'll even make you an offer – give it up willingly, and I'll spare you and your companions for now. At least, you can go and have some last-minute fun with them until the Demon Lord razes the rest of the world!"
"Okay. I get it. You win," Rock flatly said. Zelocus hadn't expected that answer, as all the other heroes had either resisted to the end or tried to escape to warn the others.
"Good. Now, where is it?" Nonetheless, Zelocus smiled that his mission had ended with an easy win.
"Right here."
Rock brought his arm up and made a fist pump motion twice. Zelocus was confused by his action, until suddenly, a loud rumbling seemed to shake the ground around them.
"Wh-What did you do?!" Zelocus yelled at the hero.
"I summoned it. The last of G.o.d's weapons."
!?
Zelocus looked around, trying to see what Rock had meant. In the distance, an unfamiliar object appeared to be making rapid distance towards them.
"What is that? A chariot?" Zelocus wrongly a.s.sumed.
"No, it is a truck. For I am, the Truck Hero." Rock smiled.
"You caaaaalllled?" The truck skidded to a stop and opened its door. In response, Rock jumped into the driver's seat and put on his seat belt.
"h.e.l.lo there. Diesel at your service. One Truck-kun, compliments of Kami-sama, ready to do your bidding."
Zelocus had no idea what was going on, but sensing the danger in front of him, he fired off a strong bolt of magic. To his surprise, the magic bounced right off the front of the truck and harmlessly dispersed.
"Kami-sama gave me a shiny coating just for this! Can't have you messing it up!" Diesel revved his engine as he started moving forward.
Seeing that his magic had failed, Zelocus dumped the rest of his mana into his strongest spell.
"BURN! BY THE UNHOLY FLAMES OF h.e.l.l! TURN MY ENEMY INTO ASH! INFERNO!!!"
Fire erupted around the truck, and the ground around it turned into molten lava. However, the truck simply rolled through that and continued charging at Zelocus.
"It can't beeeee!!!" He yelled as the red-hot surface of the truck slammed into him and carried him into a wall several meters back.
The magician was crushed between the truck and the wall, the heated metal searing his body. After Diesel backed up, a Zelocus patty with grill marks was left embedded in the wall.
"Perfect day for a barbecue, isn't it, Mr. Rock? How are you feeling in there?"
"The air conditioning is top-notch! Didn't even feel the toastiness of ultimate fire magic. A weapon of the G.o.ds surely is something." Rock patted the dashboard.
"Well, as Kami-sama told you, this is a last resort weapon for this world. Can't go calling on us all the time, you know. Let's gather your companions and quickly finish the job."
"Right-o, lead the way!" Rock did another series of fist pumps in the air.
Not long after, the forces of the Demon Lord were decimated, run over by the unstoppable might of the Truck Hero. Rock and his companions went on to recover the legendary weapons that had been taken previously. Equipping the kingdom's best warriors with them, the citizens of the world, led by Rock, stormed the Demon Lord's castle and ridded him once and for all.