Hearts That Survive Part 41

what once held me captive

and held me in place

was not done in spite

but to keep me all safe

the fates it seemed

had a lesson for me

a headstrong little boat

who had set himself free

I need ropes, and sh.o.r.es

to hold me in place

I need anchors and piers

and a good dose of grace

and wants with no thought

that consume me each day

can make me unhappy

and make me their slave

so seek anchors and make peace

in that place that you float

and that is the story

of my life as a boat

Her son. The poet.

As if reading her mind, he said, "I'm not a poet. But I wanted to speak to my dad in a language he could understand. I've had a few cla.s.ses in poetry and I know the one he wrote has form, but I don't understand much about it. Mine is, I suppose," he shrugged, "free verse maybe."

"It's the meaning that counts."

"Mom," he said softly.

She looked at him then. His eyes were kind. "You've bared your soul to me. I know it was hard. I don't share my deepest feelings, not even with Angel."

He gazed beyond her, as she'd seen John do when new thoughts came to him. "No one has ever said they want to meet me in the world beyond, in the other life, live with me forever. He wrote that in his dying moments. I was real to him. He loved me before I could do anything to deserve it."

His gaze met hers then. That sounded like church words. And if it was or wasn't, that was fine. He could say anything. They were friends.

"To become what he wished for me, what and who I should be, I need sails, and ropes, and anchors, and sh.o.r.es, and piers." He breathed deeply. She thought he could sometimes be as talkative as his mom, his friend, had been.

"Speaking of boats," he said, "I'd like to take Angel to visit with David and Joy. Will you go with us? Although I expect you'd prefer to stay with Caroline."

"But suppose Angelina goes into labor?"

"She doesn't let anything hold her back. Besides, Joy's a nurse. Hospitals are nearby. If the baby comes early, I'll say what Dad always said."

They said in unison, "We can handle it."

They laughed together. "I'd like to go. Enjoy my friends." Maybe it was time to let go of her smother love. "Get to know . . . Angel better."

73.

After talking it over, Lydia and Beau sold their holdings in the Beaumont Company. He'd rather invest in movie production and be able to survive any box office failure. However, his successes increased. Craven would have been proud of Beau's becoming known as a major filmmaker in Hollywood.

Armand was one of the attorneys who handled the negotiations, and Beau carefully reviewed them.

"Mom," he said, "a year after John Ancell's death, his company was sold by his beneficiaries, his parents." Beau looked at her. "Sold to Beaumont Company for a considerable sum. The Ancells benefited more than if they'd kept the company. Later, the company was dissolved."

She drew in a sharp breath. In the 1920s Beaumont Railroad introduced their unique train design, which was far beyond the designs of any other company, and one of the reasons Beaumont continued to thrive during the Depression.

She must have said some of those words aloud.

"I suppose you might say that both my dads contributed financially, making possible what I've been able to do."

She returned his warm smile. A mischievous glint sparked his eyes. "How would you like to visit London?"

After all these years? While the idea was taking shape, he told her of his plans. "I'm considering making a movie of Stanton-Jones's novel. I'd like to check out the setting. You'd be an invaluable source, that having been back in your day-"

"My day? I beg your pardon. I happen to be sitting right here. This is my day."

They laughed. "Your . . . younger days?"

"Mmmm." She felt the excitement. "Maybe Caroline would go. Oh. And Joanna. This would be the trip of a lifetime for her. I think she knows every word of Once Upon by heart."

He agreed. "And Bess," he said. "I'm still gathering information for the t.i.tanic movie."

She was doubtful, like before. "You think anyone is interested now?"

"Many lessons should have been learned from that tragedy. If I film Once Upon, written by a t.i.tanic victim, that will reawaken interest."

She was nodding and thinking about who might like to take the trip with them.

Caroline hesitated at first and so did Bess, both being uncertain about visiting the past. Armand had retired and after a bout with cancer, was declared free of the disease. His favorite pastime was fishing and Caroline's was the grandchildren, the oldest being David and Joy's daughter, Joanna, now sixteen.

Joanna read Once Upon when she was only twelve and insisted Beau make a movie of it. He finally considered doing it. "You know I would be invaluable to you on this trip," she reminded Beau. "I know every detail of that book."

"I wouldn't dare film a scene without your direction." Beau grinned.

Lydia had watched the close bond develop between these two through the years and thought it lovely. In her teen years Joanna had reminded Lydia of Caroline when they first met.

Willard had no interest in leaving his part of the world. Joy and David would stay behind to check on Armand.

Caroline had lost contact with Phoebe several years ago, but Beau located her. She didn't want to make the trip, but said she'd love to visit with them in Nova Scotia some day. She had lost track of her own brother a long time ago.

Several months later, Lydia thought of the saying that time flies when you're getting older.

Well, so did she. Fly, that is.