He Who Gets Slapped Part 12

BARON

I have had a hundred women, beauties, but I didn't see them. You are the first and I don't see any one else. Who strikes man with love, G.o.d or the Devil? The Devil struck me. Let me kiss your hand.

CONSUELO

No. [_She thinks a while and sighs._]

BARON

Do you think sometimes? What are you thinking about now Consuelo?

CONSUELO

[_With another sigh_]: I don't know why, I just felt sorry for Bezano.

[_Sighs again._] He is so nice to me when he teaches me ... and he has such a tiny little room.

BARON

[_Indignant_]: You were there?

CONSUELO

No. He told me about it. [_Smiling_] Do you hear the noise in there?

That's HE getting slapped. Poor thing ... although I know it doesn't hurt, it's only make-believe. The intermission is coming soon.

[_The_ BARON _throws away his cigar, takes two quick steps forward, and falls on his knees before the girl_.]

BARON

Consuelo----

CONSUELO

Please, don't. Get up. Please leave my hand alone.

BARON

Consuelo!

CONSUELO

[_Disgusted_]: Get up please, it's disgusting--you're so fat.

[_The_ BARON _gets up. Voices are heard near the door and in the ring. It is the intermission. The clowns come first, talking cheerfully and excitedly. He leads them, in his clown's dress, with painted eyebrows and white nose; the others are applauding him. Voices of the actors calling: "Bravo! HE." Then come the actors and actresses, riding-masters, and the rest, all in costume.

ZINIDA is not among them. PAPA BRIQUET comes a little later._]

POLLY

A hundred slaps! Bravo, HE!

JACKSON

Not bad, not bad at all. You'll make a career.

TILLY

He was the Professor to-day, and we were the students. Here goes another! [_Gives him a clown's slap. Laughter. All bid good evening to the BARON. He is politely rude to these vagabonds who bore him, and remains silent. They seem quite used to it. Enter MANCINI. He is the same, and with the same cane._]

MANCINI

[_Shaking hands_]: What a success, Baron--and think of it--how the crowd does love slaps. [_Whispering_] Your knees are dusty, Baron, brush them off. The floor is very dirty in here. [_Aloud_] Consuelo, dear child, how do you feel? [_Goes over to his daughter. Sound of laughing, chattering. The waiters from the buffet in the lobby bring in soda and wine. Consuelo's voice it heard._]

CONSUELO

And where is Bezano?

HE

[_Bows before the_ BARON, _affecting intimacy_]: _You_ do not recognize me, Baron?

BARON

Yes I do. You are the clown, HE.

HE

Yes I am HE Who Gets Slapped. May I presume to ask you, Baron, did you get your jewels back?

BARON

What!

HE

I was asked to return some jewels to you, and I take the liberty of---- [_The_ BARON _turns his back on him--HE laughs loudly_.]

JACKSON

Whiskey and soda! Believe me, ladies and gents, HE will surely make a career. I am an old clown, and I know the crowd. Why to-day, he even eclipsed _me_--and clouds have covered my Sun. [_Striking it._] They do not like puzzles, they want slaps! They are longing for them and dreaming about them in their homes. Your health, HE! Another whiskey and soda! HE got so many slaps to-day, there would be enough to go round the whole orchestra!

TILLY

I bet there wouldn't! [_To Jackson_] Shake!

POLLY

I bet there wouldn't--I'll go and count the old mugs.

A VOICE