Harper's Round Table, August 13, 1895 - novelonlinefull.com
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Mamma labelled her jars of sweets, "Put up by Mrs. Kay"; Later it read upon those meats, "Put down by Tommy Jay."
A PUZZLER.
MRS. TEECHUM. "That small engine pounding away in the corner, Toby, is called a donkey-engine."
TOBY. "And yet the engineer says it works with a four-horse-power.
That's funny, isn't it?"
AT THE ZOO.
BERTIE. "You say that is the bird of freedom, mamma?"
MAMMA. "Yes, Bertie."
BERTIE. "Then why is it in a cage?"
"Mamma, where do eggs come from?"
"Chickens, my dear."
"Well, that's funny. Papa says that chickens come from eggs."
Charles Mathews, the celebrated English comedian, was probably one of the best mimics the world ever produced. Born June 28, 1776, after a successful career he died on the same date, 1835, fifty-nine years later.
One of his favorite amus.e.m.e.nts was that of mimicking children. One day in Suffolk, England, he walked up to a group of boys all about eight years of age, who were playing marbles, and adopting their actions and tone of voice, he asked permission to join in the game. They were, of course, rather startled at this big lad, and stared at him in silence.
However, everything he did was so like themselves that a little fellow in the party cried out, "I say, fellows, what's the harm; let him play;"
and then turning to Mathews asked him, "Have you got any marbles?"
"No," said Mathews, "but I've got a penny."
"Well, then, you can buy some of ours," which he did, and then knuckled down and proceeded to play.
The boys by this time had ceased to regard him as other than one of themselves, never entertaining the slightest suspicion that it was the celebrated comedian they had among them.
In a short time he squabbled with the boys, and the talk was something like the following:
"You, Bill Atkins! I say you've no right to that."
"I have," said Bill.
"I say you haven't!"
"I say I have."
"Ah! you cheat! I won't play with you no more."
This shortly led to a quarrel, and taking off his coat Mathews offered to fight any of the boys. One of the little fellows immediately threw his coat and hat on the ground, and squaring up to the big fellow, urged him to come on. Mathews got out of the row by giving his adversary the marbles he had won, thus restoring good humor, and he left the scene, delighted with the amus.e.m.e.nt he had received from it, although retaining his mimicry to the end by calling out as he quitted them, "I must go to my ma."