Harnessing Your Emotions Part 1

Harnessing Your Emotions.

by Andrew Wommack.

Introduction.

When I was growing up, I was painfully shy, fearful, and timid, and those are all negative emotions. They were things I needed to be delivered from. But even though I had emotional problems, I never went through severe depression. I never experienced some of the extremes that some people talk about.

On March 23, 1968, I had a personal encounter with the Lord. I was born again at the age of eight, but at the age of eighteen I had an encounter with G.o.d in which He poured out His love upon me in such a tangible way that it radically changed my life. For four and a half months, I was so caught up in the awareness of G.o.d's presence, His love for me, and His acceptance of me that it overwhelmed me. It was a radical, awesome, life-changing experience. Most people would think, Well then, after that you must have lived happily ever after. Well then, after that you must have lived happily ever after.

Yes, it was a wonderful experience, but it wore off. After four and a half months I lost that feeling - that emotion of G.o.d's love for me and His presence with me. When it left, I went through a time of discouragement that was worse than anything I had ever known in my life. My dad died when I was a young child, and all kinds of negative things happened to me in my early life, but those things were nothing compared to what I felt when the knowledge of G.o.d's love and presence left me.

I was in Vietnam at the time in a very negative situation. I was so hungry to regain the presence of the Lord that I spent months asking G.o.d to kill me - not because I was in sin, and not because of my physical circ.u.mstances, but because I had tasted of a love and a relationship with G.o.d that I just felt I could not live without. It was like being on a high, and when I came down I asked myself how I could ever again live at a level below that.

Now the point that I am making is that the severest depression I have ever experienced came not because of sin or of problems in the physical, natural realm, but because I had a longing for G.o.d that I was no longer able to fulfill.

Some people get depressed and discouraged because they are caught up in the world. They dwell on things they should not be thinking about or they do not recognize the priority that G.o.d should have in their life. But that is not the only reason people have emotional problems. Even those who are born again, filled with the Spirit of G.o.d, and trying to live a Christian life can experience emotional problems.

We will be taking a look at why we have emotional problems, what solutions the world offers versus those the Word of G.o.d offers, and why G.o.d's answers bring lasting results. G.o.d has equipped us through His Word to control our emotions - good and bad. We can walk in true emotional stability each and every day of our lives if our faith and trust is in Him.

Chapter 1

G.o.d's Att.i.tude Toward Toward Emotions Emotions.

According to the American Heritage Dictionary, American Heritage Dictionary, the word "harness" means "to bring under control and direct the force of." I believe that is really descriptive of the way the Lord would have us deal with our emotions. He wants us to harness, to control, and to direct the force of our emotions. the word "harness" means "to bring under control and direct the force of." I believe that is really descriptive of the way the Lord would have us deal with our emotions. He wants us to harness, to control, and to direct the force of our emotions.

We cannot deny that emotions exist, and yet some people, because of the negative experiences they have had with their emotions, go to the extreme and try to become emotionless. They try to just quit feeling anything. I see this happen many times with pastors who have gotten close to someone in their church and been hurt because that person left them or turned on them, which is very common. I would say that a large percentage of ministers, because of such negative emotional experiences, simply withdraw and never get close to anyone again. They don't develop close friendships because of a fear of being hurt. They may avoid some hurts but they also miss out on one of G.o.d's greatest blessings.

G.o.d created us with emotions, and it's wrong to try to become emotionless, to withdraw to a state in which nothing ever bothers us - a state in which we are just numb. That is certainly not what G.o.d wants. We were created with emotions and we are to enjoy those emotions.

G.o.d Himself is a G.o.d of emotion. First John 4 4:8 tells us that G.o.d is love, which is an emotion. It's not only an emotion, but it involves but it involves emotion. The Bible also says in many different places emotion. The Bible also says in many different places that that the the Lord Lord is a jealous G.o.d, and that G.o.d can be angry. In Ephesians is a jealous G.o.d, and that G.o.d can be angry. In Ephesians 4:30, 4:30, it says that we can grieve the Holy Spirit. All of these are emotions. it says that we can grieve the Holy Spirit. All of these are emotions.

Emotions Are Meant for Enjoyment

I believe it is a wrong reaction when we try not to have any kind of emotional relationship with anyone because of the potential damage. That is an attempt to deny emotions, to deny that they exist, and I believe that is working against the framework, the very makeup we were created with.

We were created in G.o.d's image, and part of that likeness of G.o.d is emotions. G.o.d gave them to us to be enjoyed. When G.o.d created the world, He looked at everything He made and said, "Behold, it is good." (See Genesis 1:31.) 1:31.) So emotions were created to be good. I believe that emotions are one of the spices of life that really make it worth living. If there was no love in our life, if there was no joy, what would be the point of being alive? Just think what life would be like if we were to erase every memory of positive emotions, such as the memories of great times we have had. It would radically alter our existence. So emotions were created to be good. I believe that emotions are one of the spices of life that really make it worth living. If there was no love in our life, if there was no joy, what would be the point of being alive? Just think what life would be like if we were to erase every memory of positive emotions, such as the memories of great times we have had. It would radically alter our existence.

At the same time, even though emotions are intended to be good and G.o.d gave them to us to be enjoyed, many people find that their emotions are out of control. Instead of controlling their emotions, their emotions emotions are controlling them. Even though emotions were intended to be a positive thing, they can also be the very thing that drive people are controlling them. Even though emotions were intended to be a positive thing, they can also be the very thing that drive people to to depression, which causes all kinds of problems: divorce, anger, bitterness, hurt feelings, and even suicide. depression, which causes all kinds of problems: divorce, anger, bitterness, hurt feelings, and even suicide.

Finding Hope for Emotional Emotional Stability Stability I feel that the world is basically hopeless in the area of emotions. Because they have no no real hope, real hope, many secular psychologists just try to make people feel better by telling them they many secular psychologists just try to make people feel better by telling them they shouldn't worry about shouldn't worry about their lack of emotional stability. They shouldn't look at themselves as being abnormal, because everyone else is as bad off as they are. That's a feeble answer. their lack of emotional stability. They shouldn't look at themselves as being abnormal, because everyone else is as bad off as they are. That's a feeble answer.

It is surprising that the Church, the Christian community, has really really not taught very much in the area of emotional stability. I feel that most of the teaching that comes forth from the Church deals with not taught very much in the area of emotional stability. I feel that most of the teaching that comes forth from the Church deals with coping coping rather than rather than controlling. controlling. Instead of teaching people how to have victory in this area, the Church teaches them to "roll with the punches" and tells them to "learn something" from their emotions. There may be some benefit in that, but nothing lasting. With G.o.d's help, people cannot only learn to cope and survive, they can learn to hope and thrive in this area of emotions. Instead of teaching people how to have victory in this area, the Church teaches them to "roll with the punches" and tells them to "learn something" from their emotions. There may be some benefit in that, but nothing lasting. With G.o.d's help, people cannot only learn to cope and survive, they can learn to hope and thrive in this area of emotions.

I travel around the country teaching a lot on emotions. In my meetings, I often give an invitation asking people who have been fighting depression and losing the battle to stand up for prayer. It's not unusual to see close to eighty percent of the Christians in those meetings standing for prayer. Many times the number goes up to ninety percent. Sometimes it looks like the entire congregation is standing!

Please do not misunderstand me. I am not condemning those people. I understand their struggle, and I have compa.s.sion for them. I pray for them, but I know that is not not the way Jesus intended for us to live. The Lord came to deliver not only our eternal spiritual man, but also our soulish, emotional personality. Jesus paid for that at the cross. the way Jesus intended for us to live. The Lord came to deliver not only our eternal spiritual man, but also our soulish, emotional personality. Jesus paid for that at the cross.

Mental and emotional health is a part of what Jesus came to bring. There are truths and instructions in G.o.d's Word that, if followed and applied, I unconditionally guarantee will cause you to live an emotionally stable life.

You don't have to have extreme highs and extreme lows. You can live on an on an even plane even plane of of continual joy and peace. continual joy and peace. Isaiah 26:3 says Isaiah 26:3 says that the Lord will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed upon Him because he trusts in Him. Well, peace is an emotion, and you can live in a state of perfect emotional peace. that the Lord will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed upon Him because he trusts in Him. Well, peace is an emotion, and you can live in a state of perfect emotional peace.

Responsibility for Emotions

Moreover all these curses shall come upon thee, and shall pursue thee, and overtake thee, till thou be destroyed; because thou hearkenedst not unto the voice of the Lord Lord thy G.o.d, to keep his commandments and his statutes which he commanded thee: thy G.o.d, to keep his commandments and his statutes which he commanded thee: And they shall be upon thee for a sign and for a wonder, and upon thy seed for ever.

Because thou servedst not the LORD LORD thy G.o.d with joyfulness, and with gladness of heart, for the abundance of all things; thy G.o.d with joyfulness, and with gladness of heart, for the abundance of all things; Therefore shalt thou serve thine enemies which the Lord Lord shall send against thee, in hunger, and in thirst, and in nakedness, and in want of all things: and he shall put a yoke of iron upon thy neck, until he have destroyed thee. shall send against thee, in hunger, and in thirst, and in nakedness, and in want of all things: and he shall put a yoke of iron upon thy neck, until he have destroyed thee.

Deuteronomy 28:45-48 Here is a pa.s.sage of Scripture most people have either never seen or never applied to the area of emotions. In this pa.s.sage, the Lord was talking to the nation of Israel, telling them that because they had not done certain things, He was going to bring judgment upon them. This judgment was the result of their acts of sin.

In the Old Testament, G.o.d judged sin harshly. In the New Testament, our judgment has been placed upon Jesus, so even though we don't always do what we should, G.o.d does not judge us. But we can still benefit from seeing what the Lord judged as wrong conduct.

In this this pa.s.sage, G.o.d made an awesome statement. He said that He was pa.s.sage, G.o.d made an awesome statement. He said that He was bringing bringing judgment upon His people, because they did not serve Him judgment upon His people, because they did not serve Him with with joyfulness and gladness of heart for the abundance of all of the things He had given them. Most people read it and say, "Yes, G.o.d hated sin and judged it." But this pa.s.sage shows that G.o.d not only hated sin, He hated negative emotions. It was because His people had not served Him with their joyfulness and gladness of heart for the abundance of all of the things He had given them. Most people read it and say, "Yes, G.o.d hated sin and judged it." But this pa.s.sage shows that G.o.d not only hated sin, He hated negative emotions. It was because His people had not served Him with their emotions emotions that He was bringing judgment upon them. that He was bringing judgment upon them.

Very few people see emotions in that light. Most light. Most people people look look at emotions as being optional. They would like to have positive emotions, but they don't feel responsible for producing them. I don't at emotions as being optional. They would like to have positive emotions, but they don't feel responsible for producing them. I don't know know anyone who gets up in the morning and anyone who gets up in the morning and prays, prays, "Oh, G.o.d, help me to have a bad day. I want to be b.u.mmed out and depressed to the max." No one desires that. Yet, when certain things happen and they begin to "Oh, G.o.d, help me to have a bad day. I want to be b.u.mmed out and depressed to the max." No one desires that. Yet, when certain things happen and they begin to feel feel that way, they don't feel guilty. They don't feel they have done anything wrong. Instead, they feel justified. that way, they don't feel guilty. They don't feel they have done anything wrong. Instead, they feel justified.

When people come to me for counseling and I begin telling them what G.o.d desires for them, they immediately respond, "But look at what has happened to me." They start telling telling me about all their negative experiences. Their thinking seems to be, I' me about all their negative experiences. Their thinking seems to be, I'm justified in feeling this way because of my circ.u.mstances. How else can I feel?

Most people believe that if something negative happens, there must be a negative emotion to correspond with it. They see emotions as simply a response, not a choice. choice. To them emotions are not To them emotions are not something something they have any authority or control over; therefore, they have no responsibility for them. they have any authority or control over; therefore, they have no responsibility for them.

Emotions are just something that happens. That's the current thinking of our day. Yet, that cannot be true or G.o.d would have been unjust to bring judgment upon the nation of Israel because they did not serve Him with their emotions. It would be unjust for G.o.d to hold us accountable in an area over which we had no control. That's the current thinking of our day. Yet, that cannot be true or G.o.d would have been unjust to bring judgment upon the nation of Israel because they did not serve Him with their emotions. It would be unjust for G.o.d to hold us accountable in an area over which we had no control.

Let not your heart be troubled.

John 14:1

On the very night before His crucifixion, Jesus spoke to His disciples and told them not to let their hearts be troubled. That wasn't a suggestion, it was a command. Jesus wasn't speaking to these men in a time of prosperity and peace when everything was going great. Most people feel that when everything is going along fine they should be praising G.o.d and operating in joy and peace. When negative things come, they act as though they have some responsibility for their emotions, but when big big problems come, they think that relieves them of problems come, they think that relieves them of all all responsibility for their emotions: responsibility for their emotions: No one can he expected to overcome in this situation! No one can he expected to overcome in this situation!

The Lord was talking to His disciples just before they would face a tremendous trial. He knew that what they were going to experience was greater than anything they had ever known. He knew they were going to see what they considered their whole life - their whole calling and everything they had sacrificed they had sacrificed for - crucified, destroyed, and defeated. He knew they weren't going to understand what was happening to them in that terribly trying time. Yet, He told them, "Don't let your heart be troubled." for - crucified, destroyed, and defeated. He knew they weren't going to understand what was happening to them in that terribly trying time. Yet, He told them, "Don't let your heart be troubled."

Jesus would be unjust to give someone a command like that if that individual did not have the power to do what He said. Those disciples did have the power to keep their hearts from being troubled. They didn't exercise it, and the Lord wound up forgiving them, ministering to them, and comforting them. But His best was for them to put their trust in Him and not let their hearts be troubled.

I am not trying to put condemnation on anyone, but I am saying that before we can really start experiencing victory in this area of harnessing our emotions, we are going to have to get rid of the lie that we have no authority over them. Emotions are not just something that happen to us like a chemical reaction we have no ability to control. We are not like animals which just respond to their environment. We are people created in the image of G.o.d who have the power of choice. (See Deuteronomy 30:19.) We do have authority over our emotions through Jesus Christ, and it is time to walk in that authority and take control of our feelings.

Natural Versus Supernatural

Now if someone is hateful towards us or comes against us, it's normal to feel hurt and rejected. That is a natural human response. But we don't have to live under the control of the natural, we can live supernaturally.

If you are born again and Jesus Christ has changed you on the inside, then you have the ability to supersede natural law. You can bring your emotions under the spiritual dominion of Christ rather than under the physical dominion of the world.

I don't believe that G.o.d intends for us to live by what the natural dictates. This is one of the fundamental, foundational differences between biblical emotional stability and secular psychological stability. Psychology does not factor G.o.d into the equation. The word "psychology" comes from a root word psyche, psyche, which was the name of a Greek deity - the G.o.d of the soul. Psychology deals with the emotional and mental realm. It doesn't take into account the spiritual man. It tries to solve problems from a purely natural, physical standpoint, not from the standpoint of the supernatural ability of G.o.d. which was the name of a Greek deity - the G.o.d of the soul. Psychology deals with the emotional and mental realm. It doesn't take into account the spiritual man. It tries to solve problems from a purely natural, physical standpoint, not from the standpoint of the supernatural ability of G.o.d.

Another word for this approach is humanism. humanism. In other words, we In other words, we humans humans have all the answers within ourselves; we don't need G.o.d. According to humanistic philosophy, the answer to our problems is not found in the spiritual part of us, but in the mental and emotional part. That is totally wrong. G.o.d created mankind in His likeness and in His image, which is spiritual. (See Genesis 1:27.) G.o.d created us to be dependent upon Him. He did not create us to be stand-alone people. We must be in relationship and in communion with Him to be spiritually healthy. have all the answers within ourselves; we don't need G.o.d. According to humanistic philosophy, the answer to our problems is not found in the spiritual part of us, but in the mental and emotional part. That is totally wrong. G.o.d created mankind in His likeness and in His image, which is spiritual. (See Genesis 1:27.) G.o.d created us to be dependent upon Him. He did not create us to be stand-alone people. We must be in relationship and in communion with Him to be spiritually healthy.

All of our problems began when we separated ourselves from G.o.d and began to do our own thing and make our own decisions. That's when all the corruption came into the world. Psychology does not recognize that truth. Based purely on secular principles, it does not see G.o.d as the force of life with the power to overcome and change emotions. Instead, psychology tries to bring about solutions through manipulation in the physical, emotional realm of the mind. That is different from the way Christians are to operate. We should not accept natural things as being normal.

Yes, it is natural for me to be hurt when someone treats me unfairly. But as a Christian I am not just natural anymore; I have been born again. One third of me is wall-to-wall Holy Ghost. I now have G.o.d Himself living on the inside of me, and I am not limited to natural resources. I have the divine, supernatural ability of G.o.d on the inside of me. It would be just plain stupid of me not to draw on G.o.d's power, and to only look at things as they are and try to learn to cope with them.

As Christians, we are not to look at the unbelievers around us to see how they are living and expect that same thing for ourselves. I expect more, because I have more. G.o.d has done a miraculous thing in my life, and if you're born again G.o.d has done the same thing for you.

Accountability for Emotions

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto G.o.d.

And the peace of G.o.d, which pa.s.seth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6,7 We are accountable for our emotions. G.o.d has given us the ability to control this area of our life. If He hadn't, He would be unjust to bring judgment on us for having negative emotions. He would be unjust to command us to do something we cannot do - to react positively to positively to the negative experiences of this life. the negative experiences of this life.

As we saw in John 14:1, the Lord doesn't expect us to have positive emotions only when everything is going going our way. In John 16:33, Jesus said to His disciples, our way. In John 16:33, Jesus said to His disciples, In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good good cheer; I have overcome the world. cheer; I have overcome the world. When we are facing trials and tribulation, we are commanded to be of good cheer, because Jesus has overcome the world. When we are facing trials and tribulation, we are commanded to be of good cheer, because Jesus has overcome the world.

The Lord has given us the power to control our emotional reaction to whatever comes against us. Our emotional stability should not depend upon our circ.u.mstances or on how things are going. G.o.d's kind of peace is based totally upon Him. It's just a matter of keeping our eyes stayed on Him and walking in faith. If we can access the supernatural power and ability of G.o.d, it doesn't matter what's going on in the physical realm.

Many people think, If I could just change my mate; if my kids weren't rebellious; if I had a different job; if I had more money; if this or that or the other; then I would have emotional happiness. If I could just change my mate; if my kids weren't rebellious; if I had a different job; if I had more money; if this or that or the other; then I would have emotional happiness. That is a lie Satan uses to keep people in the mess they're in instead of just totally surrendering and saying, "G.o.d, help me." The devil keeps people thinking, That is a lie Satan uses to keep people in the mess they're in instead of just totally surrendering and saying, "G.o.d, help me." The devil keeps people thinking, Man, if this situation will just change, everything will be all right. Man, if this situation will just change, everything will be all right. But that's not true. It's not our circ.u.mstances that are the problem, it is how we are reacting to them that causes us grief. Now I am not saying that they aren't a factor. Satan uses them against us, but we can overcome all of those things. But that's not true. It's not our circ.u.mstances that are the problem, it is how we are reacting to them that causes us grief. Now I am not saying that they aren't a factor. Satan uses them against us, but we can overcome all of those things.

If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in h.e.l.l, behold, thou art there.

Psalm 139:8

Wherever you are and whatever you are going through, G.o.d is there. It doesn't matter what your situation is. You may be in a living h.e.l.l, but if your mind is focused on G.o.d and the great things He has done for you, you can have joy and peace in the midst of that situation. There are literally thousands of examples in G.o.d's Word of that very thing. I know from my own experiences that joy and peace can reign in the midst of terrible circ.u.mstances. If you are honest, you can look back over your life and remember times that, in the natural, things seemed to be falling apart; yet when you turned to G.o.d and called out to Him, the Lord gave you the peace that pa.s.ses all understanding - a supernatural peace.

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto G.o.d.

And the peace of G.o.d, which pa.s.seth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6,7 Such a peace is beyond physical explanation. There may not have been anything in the natural to make you feel good, but because you cried out to G.o.d, you experienced His supernatural peace. You can do that at any time and in any situation. Your circ.u.mstances are not an excuse for being defeated, depressed, helpless, or hopeless.

There is no natural thing and no physical thing that can stop you from experiencing the joy and the peace G.o.d intended for you to have. It is yours. It already belongs to you. It has your name on it. If you will get your thinking straightened out, you can begin to access that joy and peace regardless of your problems.

Don't wait until something in the natural changes. It is when you begin to change your heart att.i.tude that you will begin to bring your emotions under control. When you change your heart att.i.tude, you will have emotional stability, no matter what your circ.u.mstances may be.

The Source of Temptation Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of G.o.d: for G.o.d cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man.

James 1:13 One of the first steps to overcome negative emotions is to say, "Father, it is not Your will that I be this way." G.o.d is not the one who makes people depressed, discouraged, angry, or bitter.

Often people blame G.o.d, thinking He has allowed some negative thing to happen to them for some mysterious, unknown reason. They say, "G.o.d must be punishing me for something I did wrong in my life, so I guess I'll just have to bear my cross and suffer for Him even though it is destroying me emotionally." G.o.d is not the one who makes people emotional wrecks. That is not the way G.o.d operates; that's the way Satan operates.

The Cause of Temptation But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own l.u.s.t, l.u.s.t, and enticed. and enticed.

James 1:14

When this verse says "every man," it means there is no exception. This is a universal truth that applies in every situation to all mankind, men and women alike.

As I deal with people along these lines, they constantly tell me, "Well, I'm an exception. My situation's unique. You just don't understand." That's one of the deceptions Satan uses against us. This verse says that every person is drawn away by their own l.u.s.t, which eventually results in sin and death.

We usually use the word "l.u.s.t" to describe s.e.xual desire or perversion. Even though it applies in that situation, the word literally refers to any type of strong emotion. In James 4:5, it is even used in a positive sense when it says, The spirit that dwelleth in us l.u.s.teth to envy. The spirit that dwelleth in us l.u.s.teth to envy. This is not talking about some kind of perversion of our old nature; it is talking about the Holy Spirit within us which longs for us jealously. This is not talking about some kind of perversion of our old nature; it is talking about the Holy Spirit within us which longs for us jealously. The Amplified Bible The Amplified Bible translates this sentence: translates this sentence: The Spirit Whom He has caused to dwell in us yearns over us and He yearns for the Spirit [to be welcome] with a jealous love. The Spirit Whom He has caused to dwell in us yearns over us and He yearns for the Spirit [to be welcome] with a jealous love. Exodus 20:5 tells us our G.o.d is a jealous G.o.d. In Galatians 5:17, we are told that the flesh l.u.s.ts against the Spirit, and the Spirit l.u.s.ts against the flesh. All of these verses are talking about the Exodus 20:5 tells us our G.o.d is a jealous G.o.d. In Galatians 5:17, we are told that the flesh l.u.s.ts against the Spirit, and the Spirit l.u.s.ts against the flesh. All of these verses are talking about the Holy Holy Spirit. So l.u.s.t doesn't have to refer to some type of s.e.xual desire. It can refer to any strong, overwhelming emotion - positive or negative. Spirit. So l.u.s.t doesn't have to refer to some type of s.e.xual desire. It can refer to any strong, overwhelming emotion - positive or negative.

The Results of Temptation

Then when l.u.s.t hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

James 1:15 It is through l.u.s.t or strong emotion that a person is tempted and drawn away into sin. Once that individual has sinned, they are subject to the wages of sin, which is death. (See Romans 6:23.) Sin is conceived conceived in the emotions. This verse compares sin, or the in the emotions. This verse compares sin, or the process of process of the the development development of sin, to the process of childbirth. of sin, to the process of childbirth.

If a woman does not want to have a child, the time to exercise her choice choice is not after she has conceived so that she has to abort and take the life of an unborn infant. The time to exercise her choice is before she has the physical relationship that results in conception. It is wrong to use abortion as a form of birth control. If a woman doesn't want children, she shouldn't have the s.e.xual relationship that produces them. is not after she has conceived so that she has to abort and take the life of an unborn infant. The time to exercise her choice is before she has the physical relationship that results in conception. It is wrong to use abortion as a form of birth control. If a woman doesn't want children, she shouldn't have the s.e.xual relationship that produces them.

In the natural, most Christians understand that truth and see the wisdom in it. But when it comes to spiritual things, they don't understand that negative emotions are where sin is conceived. No one would ever commit the physical act of sin if they did not begin to entertain the emotions that conceive that sin on the inside of them first.

Let's take the example of suicide. A person would never commit suicide if they would reject the depression that leads to it. If they would consider thoughts of depression as sin and resist those thoughts the same way they would resist the act of suicide, they would never give birth to suicide, because it would never be conceived in the womb of their emotions.