Guarding Raine Part 63

"You gave me enough to feed three,"

she pointed out.

"I'm not used to eating like this."

He nodded in satisfaction.

"That's okay. We can refrigerate the leftovers and reheat them

tomorrow."

Smiling weakly, she got up and began to clear the table as he finished his meal.

Glancing behind her to be certain he wasn't looking, she crossed to the

wastebasket and pulled out the empty sauce jar.

The label read, Taco Sauce--Extra Spicy.

"What are you doing?"

She whirled around guiltily, holding the jar behind her back.

"Nothing."

He got up from the table with his plate.

"Did you drop something in the wastebasket?"

"Yes. I mean, I thought I did. But I didn't."

He looked ht her oddly and set his plate on the counter.

Then, before she could guess his intention, he reached out and drew her

hand forward.

Taking the jar from her, he read the label, a frown on his face.

"I'll be d.a.m.ned. I kept trying to think of what that taste was."

He looked up and c.o.c.ked an eyebrow.

"Was that, by any chance, your first experience at Mexican-Italian

dining?"

"As a matter of fact " She fought against giggling and lost.

"It was. But it was definitely memorable."

He grunted and let the jar drop into the trash before clearing the rest

of the table.

"You weren't even going to say anything,"

he accused her.

"You were just going to go on letting me believe that everything was

fine."

"Everything was fine,"

she a.s.sured him.

"After all the trouble you went to to cook a different meal, I wasn't

going to ruin your effort by complaining. Besides, it wasn't that bad."

He stared at her.

"Didn't want to hurt my feelings, huh?"

Still smiling, she shook her head.

"So, what you were actually doing could be interpreted as protecting me, couldn't it? In a way."

Her smile faded away as she interpreted his meaning.

"It's not the same thing, Maeauley,"

At his expression she insisted, "It's not. I was sparing your

feelings. You were trying to control mine."He got a dishrag and went to the table, scrubbing vigorously."You're right. It's not the same. But you can't blame me for not wanting to tell you something that would tie you up in knots. Maybe Ishould be sorry for keeping Burnett's possible involvement from you,but I'm not. And if that makes me controlling, then I'm guilty ash.e.l.l."

She looked away.

The days had dimmed her anger at him.

It hadn't been the first time, after all, that she'd been cosseted from

life.

But she'd always known that her father's unfortunate attempts at protecting her from her past had stemmed from his love for her.

Even in her most optimistic moments she couldn't a.s.sign that motivation

to Macauley.

Love was the last thing he'd accept from her, and the last thing he'd offer.

Finishing his task, Mac tossed the doth into the sink and leaned his

hips against the edge of the table.

Folding his arms across his chest, he said reflectively, "You know, an

objective man might have told you about Burnett right from the start."

He paused for a meaning-laden instant before reminding her silkily, "I

think you'l! recall exactly when I lost my objectivity. Like it or not, you can't have it both ways. I'm involved, Raine, And I can'tapologize for trying to protect you."

Her eyes went wide and soft at his words.

He wanted to take those few steps to her side and put an end to all the torment she must have been going through for the past few days.

He remained rooted where he was.

And then she spoke.

"When I heard Burnett might be involved in this thing, it did bring

back some memories I'd prefer to forget."

Her voice was as soft as the look in her eyes.

"How do you protect someone from memories, Macauley? You can't stop my

thoughts or the flashbacks. Just as I can't doit for you."

She'd turned the tables on him neatly.

She went to him then and laid a hand on his arm.

"Don't you think I'd like to free you from those demons that haunt you,

too?

But you're the only one who can step away from them. I can only behere.And I want to be,"she said achingly."You once told me that you'd stay as long as I needed you. Well, how long are you willing to stay for? Because I'm not going to stop needing you, not even when this is all over."