Guarding Raine Part 50

If anything, it could encourage the person who's doing it to be gettingthat kind of attention.

It could even trigger some sort of copycat threats.

" " That sounds a little farfetched," she said skeptically. " Publicity won't make the detective's work, or that of the postalinvestigators, any easier," he maintained. " And the fact that Kla.s.sen used it to gain media attention seems a little sick to me.

I'd think it would to you, too.

" Raine was silent. She'd been dismayed that Andr~ had chosen to gopublic like that, but she accepted it. It was, after all, in keepingwith his character. She'd never been comfortable with that tide of the business, the glitz and tinsel that sold newspapers--and promoted herpaintings. But she'd entrusted those kinds of decisions to her agent.Macauley didn't seem to approve of Andre, and the feeling, she'd noted,was mutual. " I don't know what on earth ever happened between the two of you to generate such dislike.

I've never seen Andr~ angrier than he was at the end .

of the .

evening.

" " He thinks he owns you, Raine.

" Mac~s look was a warning. " You'd better open your eyes.

The man feels his control goes far beyond selling your pictures.

He tried to get rid of me once before.

He threatened to have me taken off the job, claimed that my crew was

too distracting.

" She made a disgusted sound. " That's just the way he is, Ma-cauley, it doesn't mean anything.

He's very singular and focused.

That's probably what makes him such a good agent.

I managed my life very nicely before you came into it.

I can manage my friends, thank you very much.

" " I know you don't want to hear this, but you're going to have to ask

yourself if Kla.s.sen would have had anything to gain by sending those letters himself," Mac said in a hard voice. " The publicity stunt he pulled tonight might give clues about his motive.

" She stared at him as if he was crazy. " That has got to be the most

half-baked, ridiculous.

" She closed her eyes as a thought hit her. " Tell me you didn't voice that suspicion to Andre.

" His set jaw was all the answer she needed. She groaned feelingly. "

l don't believe you!

You don't give up, do you?

No wonder he looked like he was going to explode!

Macauloy, how could you!

I've told you before, Andr~ is more than .

my agent, he's my friend !

At least he was before you went after him tonight.

" " It's a possibility," he maintained. " Oh, and then he decided to run me off the road because a picture of my folded up car would make such a good headline?

A dead artist is worth more to him than a live one, is that it?" Mac leveled a look at her. " You said it, I didn't." She stared at him, speechless for a moment. " You have never stopped suspecting my friends, have you?

You didn't ban Andre, Greg and Sarah from the house, but i!

wasn't because I'd convinced you that they could be trusted, was it?

It was so you could watch them closer.

" He didn't deny her allegation, and that seemed to infuriate her even

more.

" Admit it, Macauley, for once in your life drop that d.a.m.n smug silent act of yours and just admit it!

Say out loud, "Yes, Raine, I suspect one of your closest friends of

terrorizing you for weeks and of then trying to kill you!

' Maybe saying it out loud will help you hear how ludicrous it sounds!

" " You can't be unemotional aboul this.

I understand that," he said evenly. Tears smarted in her eyes, and sheblinked them away furiously. " No, I can't.

I happen to take friendship a little more seriously than that.

But I don't doubt your ability to remain unemotional, Macauley.

You've had plenty of practice at that, haven:t you?

" Her words hung in the air, and he tightened his jaw against the truthof them. Yeah, right, he was a master at remaining unemotional. He'd perfected the technique and he'd never lost his objectivity. Unless you counted that time in Central America. He'd learned a lesson then he'd never forgotten. A man like him wasn't allowed the same reactions and feelings as others. He had to think with his head and his gut anddisregard anything else. Disaster had struck the only time he'dignored that stricture. He couldn't take that chance again, not withRaine. She didn't seem to realize that by concentrating on her, ratherthan her safety, he could jeopardize rather than protect her. He wouldn't take that chance. " Not accepting people at face value iswhat makes me good at my job.

That's exactly what's going to keep you safe.

" It was no use arguing with him, she thought. He was a man to whom the job was everything, and he didn't spare a lot of time worryingabout the niceties while he went about doing it. She should be happyto have that single-minded intensity directed toward her safety and herprotection. But it was impossible to still the desire to have itfocused on her, for her own sake.

And she continued to be troubled by the fact that it was unfair for herfriends to be under suspicion, simply because they were her friends. " Don't ask me to help you," she said bitterly. " And don't ask me to believe, even for a minute, that one of my friends has anything to dowith this.

" He was silent. He wouldn't ask that of her. It was the least he could do, and if keeping his suspicions to himself saved her somegrief, well, that was fine by him. G.o.d knew he'd caused her enoughgrief himself. The ride back to her home was silent after that. Darkness had long since fallen, and the security lights were shiningbrightly as they approached her house. It looked, Raine thoughtsourly, as though they had lit the place up to land small aircraft inthe yard. She hated this--she hated all of it. These lights calledattention to the fact that she had more to fear these days than merenight. Much more. The partially finished fence looked like a blackskeleton across the front of her property. Macauley gave three shortblasts of the horn as he entered her drive, causing her to jump. She snuck a look at him. She might hate the security measures they hadbeen forced to take, but she could never hate him. She was still staunchly loyal to her friends, and he made her angry with hissuspicions of them. But even arguing with him, faced with hisimplacable will, she couldn't help trusting him.

Believing in him. Loving him. She sighed and got out of the truckwithout waiting for him to come around to help her. They walked to thehouse, still without words. She felt as tightly drawn as a wire,despite the lateness of the hour. This wasn't going to be a nightwhere sleep came easily, despite the exhaustion that weighted herlimbs. Turning on lights in her path, she headed to the kitchen andpoured herself a gla.s.s of milk. She flicked a light switch near theback door, unlocked the door and let herself out onto the patio. She sat down and looked into the distance broodingly, sipping occasionallyfrom her gla.s.s. When she'd seen Macauley pace this area at night, hehadn't had the lights on, she remembered. He'd blended into the darkness in a way that said he was comfortable there, a familiarvisitor to total blackness. Or maybe he thought he didn't deserve tolive in the light, the way he felt he didn't deserve so many otherthings.

He stood in the doorway for a time and watched her. She was in a melancholy mood, he could sense it. Not really angry with him anym9re,but almost... resigned. He found he preferred her anger. He could deal with her sparks, the way she could flare up at him and, more oftenthan he was comfortable remembering, goad him into flaring back. No woman had ever had that kind of effect on him, because n.o.body else hadgotten that close. He'd been told that his temper was a fearsomething. But Raine Michaels wasn't afraid to go toe to toe with him andgive him h.e.l.l right back. The trait shouldn't have been seductive. But it was. " Plotting my demise?

" he finally questioned, and stepped out on the small patio with her.She didn't move a muscle, and he knew she'd been aware of his presence."

I'!.

I never agree with the way your mind works," she responded. Then her head moved slowly to face him. " But I'm too darn lazy to dig asix-foot trench.

You're safe With me.

" " I'm not so sure," he murmured cryptically. A woman who could infiltrate his sterile world and kick more into life than his ii-bido could hardly qualify as safe. Although all signs pointed to the fact that his libido was also alive and well. His hormones were on red alert all the time when he was around her, and often when he wasn't. " Where were you last stationed before you left the Army?

" she asked suddenly." He knew then, in that instant, that she'd beenout here brooding about him. She'd been holding back a lot ofquestions since the night he'd let her know, in no uncertain terms,that he didn't much like answering them. He'd spent a career beingclose lipped and watchful. It had saved his b.u.t.t on many an occasion.But she'd put things together about him as easily as if she'd writtenhis biography.

He no longer questioned that ability of hers. And tonight he wasn'tgoing to fight it.

He'd refused to give anything of himself to her. A few answers seemed little enough. " Central America.

" She turned her eyes to him, silently waiting for him to go on. " It doesn't particularly matter where.

There are lots of little countries there with shaky governments, and atone time or another I was in all of them.

They all shared the same poverty, and the same desperation.

There were always people waiting for a chance to make money, andopportunities were plentiful, if they weren't too particular about thelaw.

Most of them weren't.

" He'd known men who would slit their grandmother's throat for adollar, and others working alongside them who did what they did becausethey needed the money for their families, for their children.Sometimes, in the dark of night, the motives of the latter seemed moreadmirable to him than his own.

" Our country has interests in who controls those governments.

The people our politicians want to see in power there aren'tnecessarily good men or wise men.

But for some reason they fit with our political agenda.

It was my goal to make sure those people stayed in power.

" Constantly moving, he'd a.s.sessed the political climate of the countryand, when l~e had to, arranged events that would help the localgovernment stay in control. The goals hadn't been his own, but he'dcarried them out faithfully. And in the process lost his soul. Raine'seyes were wide as they met his. " What happened to you there?

" she whispered. Every instinct she had told her that whatever it washad shaped his view of the world ever since. Was continuing to shapeit. " I miscalculated the danger in one locale.

A bomb went off in the hotel where I was staying.

Trey dragged me out of the rubble, got me to a hospital.

" After a pause, he went on in a flat tone, " I may have blown my cover.

The bomb may have been placed there for me, or it could have been onemore senseless act of random violence that had been going on in thatcountry.

I'll never know.

Forty-seven people died that night.

" " You blame yourself?

" She didn't need his answer, she read it in his silence. This, then,was the cause for the demons that still tormented his conscience. " Yeah," he said finally, staring past her, past the lights, into thedarkness. " I blame myself.

" She wished suddenly that she'd never brought up the past, hatedherself for putting that look on his face. What right did she have,after all? She, better than anyone, should know the pain that resultedfrom revisiting the past. It was like pulling the scab off a woundthat wouldn't quite heat. The anguish didn't fade with time, nor didthe memories. She almost hoped he'd tell her to go to h.e.l.l, then clamup again.

At least she wouldn't have to face the bitter regrets on his face or bea witness to his suffering. But she stopped herself in the midst ofher self-castigation. She knew from experience that the past had to befaced before the future could be dealt with. Maeauley had to forgivehimself before he'd ever feel he deserved anything good life couldoffer him. That was a truth he'd have to learn to accept. She was more than a little surprised when, after a long silence, he continued." There was a woman.

I'd rescued her from some guerrilla troops roaming the town, and shewas"-he hesitated for an instant " --grateful.