Gleanings in Graveyards Part 1

Gleanings in Graveyards.

by Horatio Edward Norfolk.

PREFACE.

Although this country may be behind many others in the poetic or cla.s.sic character of its monumental inscriptions, it is certainly not so in the production of Epitaphs of a curious and absurd character. Whether it is that the British are, as a nation, witty and humorous, and that they are desirous that their peculiarities should be recorded even in the sanctuaries of their dead, or that they consider _true_ records of the departed to be of little or no value, has yet to be shown. It is, however, remarkable that if we refer to the epitaphial records of other nations, we find that they are, as a rule, noted for their beauty, elegance, or truth, whereas of the many graveyards in Great Britain there is scarcely one that does not afford examples of humourous effusions.

The Egyptians, although they do not furnish us with many epitaphs worthy of note, do not seem to have devoted themselves to the production of frivolous inscriptions, but contented themselves with inscribing on their sarcophagi and coffins, the name, descent, and functions of the departed.

The Greeks (as Mr. Pettigrew remarks in his _Chronicles of the Tombs_), "wrote their epitaphs in elegiac verse, and afterwards in prose, and the collections published by various hands are well known to, and duly appreciated by, scholars."

The Roman tombs also afford us an example worthy of imitation, in the purity and simplicity of their inscriptions. They usually began with D.

M. (Diis Manibus), followed by the name, office, and age of the deceased, and a conclusion, which informed the reader by whom or through what means the inscription was erected.

Whether the Saxons or the Danes used monumental inscriptions, either in their own or in the Latin tongue, has been doubted. The few which we have for people of the Saxon times, are probably the compositions of a later date. Three or four small slabs, however, bearing crosses and some early British female names, supposed to be those of nuns, were dug up some years ago at Hartlepool.

We are informed also, by the above quoted author, that "in this country, in early times, were inscriptions prohibited to be engraven on any tombs but those belonging to persons distinguished either by their high position, as governors of the kingdom or as military commanders, or remarkable for their wisdom and virtues." Since this prohibition has been removed, however, no time seems to have been lost in showing the necessity for, and the advantage of, such regulation.

The following pages are intended to convey some idea, to those who have not the opportunity to search our churchyards for themselves, of the extent to which the practice has been carried of inscribing tombstones with verses remarkable either for their quaintness, or their rude attempts at humour.

It has been thought advisable to intersperse with the curious Epitaphs a few inscriptions, more elegant in their composition, and more praiseworthy in their purport.

The Miscellaneous are for the most part authentic, and so frequently placed on gravestones, that to prevent repet.i.tion it has been thought best to arrange them in a chapter by themselves.

It is hoped, that while this collection of curious Epitaphs may afford amus.e.m.e.nt to all, that it will not prove offensive to any, nor fail to convey the salutary lesson that a healthful smile may be elicited from the homely record of human woe.

H. E. N.

CHELSEA ATHENaeUM, 1_st April_, 1861.

EPITAPHS.

Bedfordshire.

COLMWORTH.

Here is a magnificent monument, erected in 1611, by Lady Dyer, in memory of her deceased husband, Sir William Dyer, the inscription upon which tells us that "they multiplied themselves into seven children." Beneath are the following quaint lines:-

My dearest dust, could not thy hasty day Afford thy drowsy patience leave to stay One hour longer, so that we might either Have set up, or gone to bed together!

But since thy finished labour hath possessed Thy weary limbs with early rest, Enjoy it sweetly, and thy widow bride Shall soon repose her by thy slumbering side!

Whose business now is to prepare My nightly dress and call to prayer.

Mine eyes wax heavy, and the days grow old, The dew falls thick-my blood grows cold:- Draw, draw the closed curtains, and make room, My dear, my dearest dust, I come, I come.

EDWORTH.

Here lies father, and mother, and sister, and I, We all died within the s.p.a.ce of one year, They be all buried at Whimble except I, And I be buried here.

LUTON.

In the "Wenlock Chapel" in the above church, on an embattled altar-tomb is a rec.u.mbent figure of a priest-representing William Wenlock, who died 1392. Round the verge of the tomb is inscribed, in ancient characters,-

. . . . Ilemus hic tumulatus de Wenlock natus; in ordine presbiteratus; alter hujus ille: dominus meus fuit ville: hic jacet indignus: anime Deus es...o...b..nignus!

On the side of the tomb,-

In Wenlock brad I: in this town lordshcippes had I! here am I now lady: Christes moder help me lady. Under these stones: for a tym shal I rest my bones; deyn mot I ned ones. Myghtful G.o.d gra't me thy woues. Ame'.

Formerly in a window of this chapel was a portrait of Wenlock, with the following inscription:-

Jesu Christ, most of might, Have mercy on John de Wenlock, knight, And of his wife Elizabeth, Which out of this world is pa.s.sed by death, Which founded this chapel here, Help thou them with your hearty prayer, That they may come unto that place, Where ever is joy and solace.

On an altar-tomb in the tower is the following:-

Thomas Gilbert here doth stai Waiting for G.o.d's judgment day, Who died August 25, 1566.

A slab on the floor of the south aisle bears this inscription,-

Here lyeth the body of Daniel Knight, Who all my lifetime lived in spite.

Base flatterers sought me to undoe, And made me sign what was not true.

Reader take care, whene'er you venture To trust a canting false dessenter, Who died June 11th, in the 61st year of his age, 1756.

A friend of Daniel Knight (at whose instigation the above epitaph was engraved during his lifetime, and the future tombstone used as a cupboard door) prepared an inscription for his own tomb,-

"Here lies the body of Thomas Proctor Who lived and died without a doctor."

But fate, jealous of the reputation of the faculty, broke his leg, and compelled him to sacrifice to aesculapius.

Berkshire.

BUCKLEBURY.