Friends Or Lovers Part 33

"But Penny?"

"Trust me, Ellie. This is between you and him."

She looked slightly confused.

"But tomorrow," I said. "I want all the gory details, okay?"

She grinned broadly.

"Okay, p.i.s.s off then and see if I care!" she said.

If I had only heard her words I might have been offended, but the excitement and joy that filled her whole body was matched only by the size and breadth of the smile she beamed. With my coat on, I walked over and gave her a big hug.

"Thank you!" she said.

"Youre welcome," I replied.

As she dialled the number and let it ring, I turned and walked out of the flat. In the distance the sound of an excited young woman could be made out amidst much laughter and giggling. Elona had come alive she was, as she put it, ready to learn 'how to live. As I walked down a flight of stairs into the car park, I realised that this was the first time Id ever been someones heroine. Even as I contemplated my own heroes and heroines Mike, Elaine and John the extent of my impact on Elona was beginning to dawn on me. She had seen me stand up for her against men she felt had hurt her. Even as I chided myself for my judgement, I realised that perhaps this mattered less to her than the example I had set. In her eyes, I had challenged the behaviour of others and shown no fear. She could not see what was going on inside me, only the confidence and bl.u.s.ter that erupted when I was in the grip of moral indignation. I would have to talk to her about that. Some other time.

Perhaps I was able to show her that you could be a woman in your own right, with your own thoughts and feelings, able to make your own judgements even if sometimes they turn out to be flawed and wrong. For me, I had taken from the experience that I had to be more cautious and respectful of others. She was setting out on a b.u.mpy road of that I had no doubt but after several weeks of pain and years of loneliness it was a moment of unfettered joy. She grasped her future with both hands and held on firmly.

Chapter 46.

Mike and I had a quiet evening at my flat watching a DVD. At around 10pm the phone rang. It was Elona again, laughing and shouting that she needed a wage rise.

"Why?" I asked. "Not just booked a holiday with Phil, have you?"

"I talked so much I ran out of credit. Need a raise to keep my mobile phone topped up."

"Then how come you are talking to me now?"

I heard her giggle, and then heard something crash in the background.

"What was that? Is there someone with you?"

"Maybe," she said coyly.

"Faaannnnntttttaaaa.s.sssttttiiiiccccc!" I shouted, and Mike looked at me with a quizzical expression on his face.

"Now dont rush things. Take things slowly," I started to say.

"I dont think 'slowly is in his vocabulary, Pen!"

"Are you okay?"

"Im on cloud nine! Thank you so much."

"I did nothing, really."

Mike got up and walked over to me and I felt his arms move around my stomach. He fondled me gently as I talked some more. Gradually, one of his hands edged up inside my blouse and started to fondle my b.r.e.a.s.t.s while the other stroked my leg, then moved underneath my skirt and played with the elastic of my pants.

"Ive got to go now, Ellie!" I said.

"Why?"

"Because I wont be able to talk soon!"

"Why? Whats wrong?"

"Nothing at all it is just that right at this moment there is someones hand gently playing with my.....oooohhh.....left nipple, while the other.......aaahhhh......has just gone down inside my pants."

Mike whispered in my ear "Keep talking".

"What?" I replied. Elona thought I was talking to her and asked again what was wrong.

"Keep talking," whispered Mike a second time.

"Ellie? I have a man here who is dying .........." I had to pause for a second as his finger touched a spot that took my breath away, "......to have s.e.x with me while I talk on the phone to you......."

I heard a round of giggling as Elona repeated my words to Phil. A few moments later, her level of laughter increased and I heard her shriek.

"Me too!" she said when she finally came back to the phone.

"Better finish.....this.........conversation.........Oh G.o.d!........"

Mike had knelt down on the floor, lifted me onto the table, pulled down my knickers and buried his head between my legs.

"........tomorrow.......Ive got.....to go.....bye Ellie!"

I put the phone down and spread my legs wide. He was dying for me. Right there in the hall Mike nibbled the folds of my flesh while two fingers eased their way in. I imagined what might be happening to Elona, that Phils strong body had moved between Elona legs. I tried to imagine Elonas excitement as she trembled in antic.i.p.ation of her first f.u.c.k. As Mike pleasured me between my legs, I pictured Phil ripping open Elonas blouse, then picking her up and carrying her to bed.

In my minds eye, I watched him as he spread her legs and climbed between them. His strong muscular b.u.t.tocks thrust into her with each movement of Mikes fingers inside me. Just as I started to wonder whether it was pure wickedness to picture Phil as Mike brought me off, waves of pleasure started to glide up through my body. I arched back and focussed my thoughts on the feeling of Mikes tongue while picturing Phil between Elonas legs. The surge continued and built, and I surfed towards heaven, my breath shortening, my eyes closed, until the nerve ends all pulsated simultaneously and I convulsed struggling to catch my breath.

As I lay there, moaning, Mikes lips made their way up the front of my body gently kissing the b.r.e.a.s.t.s that I had exposed, until I felt his breath on my face. He tried to kiss me but I pulled away.

"How do you do that?" I said.

"Do what?" he asked.

"How dyou make me feel like that?"

He laughed gently.

"I dont know. Comes naturally, I guess."

He did not intend the pun, but I laughed anyway. Then I put both my hands on his cheeks and felt tears welling up in my eyes.

"Have you any idea how deeply I am in love with you?" I asked.

It was the first time I had uttered the actual words and I waited for his reply.

"This much?" he said, gesturing a small amount with his thumb and finger.

I laughed again but wanted to preserve the tenderness of the moment.

"No. This much!" I said as I pressed my lips onto his and aggressively pushed my tongue into his mouth. I held his head in my hands as I explored everything I could find. As we kissed, he picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. After carrying me to the bedroom, he threw me down manfully and put his hands on my knees while glancing down at a huge erection.

"And I love you this much!" he said.

He tried to spread my legs but I resisted him. Something told me I was wicked but I just knew he was dying for me. I revelled in the l.u.s.t that wed created and teased him to the full, pretending to resist while egging him on to have his way with me.

"Come on, big boy," I said, remembering the way Elona and I had goaded Phil. "Show me what you are made of!"

As these words left my mouth, I gave in and allowed him to overpower me. I held his sleek and powerful body as it tensed and relaxed. I spread my legs as wide as I could, and guided his p.e.n.i.s towards my p.u.s.s.y. Then, for reasons I could not fathom, my mind suddenly cast itself back to the moment when John had asked me about the army and s.e.xism. Suddenly here, as Mike overpowered me and started to thrust himself deep into me, I found myself wondering if I had stumbled across the answer.

I immediately pushed the thought from my mind. As the man I had chosen to give my heart glided into me again and again, I helped to bring him to the heights of ecstasy. As a teenager, my sister once said to me that she could not imagine anything more satisfying than the thought of her lover so filled with pa.s.sion that he could not resist her. She would fantasise about her boyfriend so full of l.u.s.t that he would force himself on her as she tried to resist him. At the time, I found her fantasies sick, as if she was fantasising about rape. But in this moment I realised what was so exciting to her. I wanted to be Mikes greatest fantasy, the woman that he could not resist. I wanted to him to feel an uncontrollable desire for me that no-one, not even I, could stop. If I could do that to him...for him...he would be mine forever.

And there, as Mike arched in the throws of o.r.g.a.s.m and shot his sperm deep into me, I hoped he was feeling the same crushing desire that I felt for him. I hoped he felt the bewilderment and disorientation I felt when his magic tongue took me to another plane of existence. I watched his face strain as he reached the limits of his pa.s.sion, every spark of s.e.xual energy that he possessed ignited and firing through his body. What greater gift could I give him? And what more could he give me than show his inability to resist me? As I lay on the bed, with Mikes spent body still lying inside me, I held him in my arms and wept. All the certainties that I had ever felt about how men and women should behave vanished in the dust. I had entered a new world and reached a new level of understanding.

Chapter 47.

My first task, when I arrived at work the next morning, was to invite Phil into my office for a private conference. I had two agendas - one personal, the other professional. Unusually for him, he was late so I pa.s.sed the time by checking over my e-mails. There was the usual junk that I discarded, but today I looked at them differently. I found myself less worried about p.o.r.nography than e-mails offering prescription drugs. Did we want staff self-prescribing Vallium or Diazepam? That thought horrified me considerably more than s.e.x-invitations from places like Dirty d.i.c.ks or Giant Jugs. In fact, I was tempted to tear up the zero-tolerance policy on p.o.r.n completely. Would it really cause a problem to treat people like adults and allow them to exercise their own judgement?

I received an e-mail from Dave. It was my appraisal form. When I started, one of my first acts was to introduce 360 reviews. I had to appraise myself, then ask one of my peers, then one of my subordinates and lastly get feedback from a director. The objective was to stimulate discussion and reflection about different perceptions of my work.

I printed it and filled it in. Each part of the appraisal had tick boxes. The tick boxes allowed each person to say how the employee performed relative to their own expectations. I felt this was better than a 1 5 scale because "communication skills" in a CEO were much more important than in a bookkeeper. But when it came to "attention to detail" the reverse was probably true.

It was strange filling out an appraisal form that I had designed myself, but I did it both quickly and diligently, adding written comments at the bottom of each section. I was quite hard on myself a reflection of the difficult period I had just been through but in the comments I talked extensively about what I had learnt. As soon as Phil arrived, I gave the form to him and asked if he would complete it then pa.s.s it to Jo. Finally, Dave had to complete the section as director.

When Phil had completed the form I called him into my office. As he walked through the door the two of us beamed at each other in the knowledge that we had both enjoyed the evening before.

"Good morning, Mr Trent!" I said with mock formality. "Had a good evening, did you?"

"Yes, Ms Leyton," he replied with a smile. "Very pleasant. How about you?"

"Ive had worse!" I replied in probably the biggest understatement of my entire life.

Phil broke into laughter and I instinctively moved to embrace him.

"Too late," he said, slightly defensively.

"For what?" I asked.

"Im off the market, Penny!"

Before I could protest, I realised that he was having a joke with me.

"Between friends," I said, "I think its permitted."

My gentle sarcasm amused him and he felt slightly awkward as I put my arms around him for the first time. After a second, his arms made their way around my back and he held me much more tightly than I expected. It felt really good. I found myself hanging onto him and not letting go. I started to rub his back, then felt his hands on mine.

When we finally let go of each other, we looked into each others eyes and both realised the intensity of the feelings that we had just communicated.

"Well, theres a first for everything!" I said with some surprise.

"She worships you, you know!"

A sudden surge of modesty interrupted my moment of vanity.

"I cannot think why!" I replied.

"I can," he said, as he separated himself from me and sat down in a chair.

"You are too kind, sir!" I said mocking him a bit, but inside I was uncomfortable at anyone building me into a special person.

"She gave me a message for you, by the way," added Phil.

"What is it?"

He rummaged around in his briefcase and brought out an envelope. On the outside were the words "Penny Leyton strictly Private and Confidential". I showed the writing to Phil.

"Go on then, hoppit and come back in 5 minutes. Go make a coffee or something."

"Arent you going to show me?" he asked.

"Rule number 1," I said, "if an employee says something is private and confidential, then treat it as private and confidential! Go on, see you in a moment!"

Phil, slightly surprised, but accepting of my command, left for the coffee machine while I opened the envelope. Inside was a folded bit of paper.

Penny,