Fontainbleau Part 2

_Lack._ I will. [_To LAPOCHE._] This ill-looking little rascal--

[_To HENRY._

_Lap._ Much oblige to you.

_Lack._ [_Apart to HENRY._] If you are slack in cash, [_Loud._] you'll find his lodgings convenient.

_Lap._ Very convenient, because----

_Lack._ [_Apart._] Because when he asks for his money, you may kick him down stairs.

_Lap._ Much oblige to you, sir.

[_Bows to LACKLAND._

_Lack._ [_Apart._] My way of doing things. [_Loud._] Wasn't I a good customer, Lapoche?

_Lap._ Oui, it does a tradesman's heart goot to see you--[_Aside._]--outside of his door.

_Lack._ I paid you eight livres a week, wasn't it?

_Lap._ Oui, monsieur, you did--[_Aside._]--promise me dat.

_Lack._ [_Looking._] Ladies! Must attend where beauty calls--[_Pulls down his Ruffles._] My dear Henry, at your time, I am yours; from a beef steak to a bottle of burgundy--can't stay now--you know I was always a Philander among the ladies.

[_Exit._

_Lap._ Always great gander among the ladies.

_Henry._ Poor Lackland!

_Lap._ Lately from Londres, monsieur? I was vonce great man in Londres; but now I am anoder man.

_Henry._ Another man! what, then, my motley friend, I suppose you have a character for every country?

_Lap._ Oui, I have appear in many character, but Londres vas my grand theatre--Ah! England is de great field of battle for us soldiers of fortune; and ven I could no longer fight my vay----

_Henry._ Why, then you----

_Lap._ Oui, I ran avay. Ah, monsieur! in England, I vas high, and I vas low--I vas dit, and I vas dat:--I vas cook, parfumeur, maitre de langue, juggle, and toos drawer--in short I vas every ting.

_Henry._ And pray, my good friend, what are you now?

_Lap._ I am now myself, in my true charactere--A tailor, a votre service.

_Henry._ A tailor! what, and come here to the races of Fontainbleau, to sport your Louis d'ors upon the jockeys of France?

_Lap._ Non, monsieur, but I am come here to sport de pretty jacket upon de jockeys of France. Ah! I vill show so fine de green jockey, de blue jockey, and de red jockey!--dey may talk of vip and spur, but de beauty of de race come from my shear and timble.

_Henry._ Pray, which is your best hotel here?

_Lap._ Hotel! Ah, monsieur, vy no lodge in my house? So convenient for de single gentilhomme!--[_Aside._] I will not tell him of de lady, my lodger, because I love her myself.

_Henry._ Well, I don't know but private lodgings, at this time, may be preferable to the noise and bustle of an hotel.

_Lap._ Eh bien, monsieur, vill you look at my lodgment?

_Henry._ With all my heart.

_Lap._ Je vous attend.--[_Calls._] Nannette!--And if you like them, you may send your baggage and little ting after you.--Nannette! prepare for de new lodger.

[_Exeunt._

_Enter GAGGER, and MRS. CASEY, from Tavern._

_Gag._ This way, Sir John--this way, your honour! Madam, it's Sir John Bull, and Lady Bull, and Miss Bull, and all the family.

_Sir John._ [_Without._] I wish, my Lady Bull, you'd let Robin have rolled us up to the door.

_Mrs. Casey._ Ha! upon my honour, it is Sir John Bull and his lady--this is the truth of an English family.

_Enter SIR JOHN and LADY BULL, FRENCH INN-KEEPER, Four FRENCH PORTERS, with small Bandboxes, &c._

_Mrs. Casey._ Sir John, you are welcome from Paris.

_Sir J. B._ Welcome from Paris! [_Mimicking._]---Where the devil are you taking us? Such a way, to walk over your d.a.m.ned pavement!

_Lady B._ Oh fie, Sir John! Do you consider where you are? When English gentlemen come to France, they should leave their dammes at Dover.

_Sir J. B._ I wish I had left you, or myself there, damme!--what are these fellows doing with the things?

_Lady B._ Don't you see, the gentlemen are porters, Sir John?

_Sir J. B._ Porters! pickpockets--paid by the ounce: One Thames Street porter, would take the whole seven and their bundles on his knot; here's a proof--

_Enter ROBIN, with a very large Trunk._

My trunk, Robin?

_Rob._ Yes, your honour; four of the monsieurs trying to carry it, dropped it in the dirt, yonder.

[_Puts it down._

_Lady B._ Robin, you must immediately find Colonel Epaulette's lodge, and let him know we are arrived.

_Sir J. B._ Yes, when you've taken care of the trunks:--and, d'ye hear, Robin, you'll find Squire Tally-ho there, tell him that I'm come, and that Dolly's longing to see him. [_Exit ROBIN._] But where is she?