Fanny and the Servant Problem - novelonlinefull.com
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DR. FREEMANTLE [rises]. I beg pardon, have I the pleasure of seeing Lady Bantock?
f.a.n.n.y. Yes.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Delighted. May I introduce myself--Dr. Freemantle?
I helped your husband into the world.
f.a.n.n.y. Yes. I've heard of you. You don't mind my closing this door, do you? [Her very voice and manner are changed.]
DR. FREEMANTLE [a little puzzled]. Not at all.
f.a.n.n.y [she closes the door and returns]. Won't--won't you be seated?
DR. FREEMANTLE. Thanks. [They both sit.] How's the headache?
f.a.n.n.y. Oh, it's better.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Ah! [A silence.] Forgive me--I'm an old friend of the family. You're not a bit what I expected.
f.a.n.n.y. But you like it? I mean you think this--[with a gesture]--is all right?
DR. FREEMANTLE. My dear young lady, it's charming. You couldn't be anything else.
f.a.n.n.y. Thank you.
DR. FREEMANTLE. I merely meant that--well, I was not expecting anything so delightfully demure.
f.a.n.n.y. That's the idea--"seemly." The Lady Bantocks have always been "seemly"? [She puts it as a question.]
DR. FREEMANTLE [more and more puzzled]. Yes--oh, yes. They have always been--[His eye catches that of Constance, first Lady Bantock, looking down at him from above the chimney-piece. His tone changes.]
Well, yes, in their way, you know.
f.a.n.n.y. You see, I'm in the difficult position of following her LATE ladyship. SHE appears to have been exceptionally "seemly." This is her frock. I mean it WAS her frock.
DR. FREEMANTLE. G.o.d bless my soul! You are not dressing yourself up in her late ladyship's clothes? The dear good woman has been dead and buried these twenty years.
f.a.n.n.y [she looks at her dress]. Yes, it struck me as being about that period.
DR. FREEMANTLE [he goes across to her]. What's the trouble? Too much Bennet?
f.a.n.n.y [she looks up. There is a suspicion of a smile]. One might say--sufficient?
DR. FREEMANTLE [laughs]. Excellent servants. If they'd only remember it. [He glances round--sinks his voice.] Take my advice.
Put your foot down--before it's too late.
f.a.n.n.y. Sit down, please. [She makes room for him on the settee.]
Because I'm going to be confidential. You don't mind, do you?
DR. FREEMANTLE [seating himself]. My dear, I take it as the greatest compliment I have had paid to me for years.
f.a.n.n.y. You put everything so nicely. I'm two persons. I'm an angel--perhaps that is too strong a word?
DR. FREEMANTLE [doubtfully]. Well -
f.a.n.n.y. We'll say saint. Or else I'm--the other thing.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Do you know, I think you could be.
f.a.n.n.y. It's not a question about which there is any doubt.
DR. FREEMANTLE. Of course, in this case, a LITTLE bit of the devil -
f.a.n.n.y [she shakes her head]. There's such a lot of mine. It has always hampered me, never being able to hit the happy medium.
DR. FREEMANTLE. It IS awkward.
f.a.n.n.y. I thought I would go on being an angel -
DR. FREEMANTLE. Saint.
f.a.n.n.y. Saint--till--well, till it became physically impossible to be a saint any longer.
DR. FREEMANTLE. And then?
f.a.n.n.y [she rises, turns to him with a gesture of half-comic, half- tragic despair]. Well, then I can't help it, can I?
DR. FREEMANTLE. I think you're making a mistake. An explosion will undoubtedly have to take place. That being so, the sooner it takes place the better. [He rises.] What are you afraid of?
f.a.n.n.y [she changes her tone--the talk becomes serious]. You've known Vernon all his life?
DR. FREEMANTLE. No one better.
f.a.n.n.y. Tell me. I've known him only as a lover. What sort of a man is he?
A pause. They are looking straight into each other's eyes.
DR. FREEMANTLE. A man it pays to be perfectly frank with.
f.a.n.n.y. It's a very old family, isn't it?
DR. FREEMANTLE. Old! Good Lord no! First Lord Bantock was only Vernon's great-grandfather. That is the woman that did it all. [He is looking at the Hoppner.]
f.a.n.n.y. How do you mean?
DR. FREEMANTLE. Got them their t.i.tle. Made the name of Bantock of importance in the history of the Georges. Clever woman.
f.a.n.n.y [leaning over a chair, she is staring into the eyes of the first Lady Bantock]. I wonder what she would have done if she had ever got herself into a really first-cla.s.s muddle?
DR. FREEMANTLE. One thing's certain. [f.a.n.n.y turns to him.] She'd have got out of it.
