Episode I Journal_ Anakin Skywalker Part 4

"I am not afraid, " I said softly.

The faces of the other Jedi were blank. I couldn't tell if they believed me. But Yoda said we could continue....

More questions followed. I tried my best to answer them honestly and not let my emotions get in the way.

When the questioning ended, Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan, and I left the room and waited outside. Neither of the two Jedi standing with me revealed very much. I sensed that Qui-Gon was eager and hopeful. Oddly, Obi-Wan's feeling seemed to be the exact opposite. From him I sensed impatience, and even annoyance that he had to be there with Qui-Gon and me. I was pretty sure he didn't like me.

Meanwhile, the Council members spoke quietly. Recalling how easily Yoda and the others had read my thoughts, I wondered if they were now sharing their own thoughts on my future. I might have been able to control my thoughts, but I couldn't control my heart. It was pounding as hard as if I were in the final stretch of a Podrace.

Finally, we were called back into the Council chamber. Yoda and the other Jedi spoke, said my body cells contained a high concentration of something called midi-chlorians and that the Force was strong with me.

Qui-Gon seemed glad. He a.s.sumed that meant they agreed with him and that I was to be trained!

But his words were met by an uncomfortable silence.

No, said Mace Windu. I would not be trained.

I couldn't stop the tears that suddenly flooded into my eyes. I'd come all this way! They said the Force was strong in me. How could they do this?

Qui-Gon seemed stunned and asked the Jedi Council's reason. Mace Windu explained that I was too old to begin the training.

Too old? I'm only nine! It sounded crazy, but then I remembered what an old s.p.a.cer had once told me. He knew about the Jedi and had even flown with them into battle once long ago. I remembered now that he'd said that Jedi were almost always identified before they turned one year old.

Then Mace Windu added that the Council sensed that there was too much anger inside me.

I wanted to tell them that they were wrong. If there was anger in me I could control it. I could rise above it! But I knew I had to appear calm. I couldn't let them know I was feeling angry.

Qui-Gon argued some more. He refused to accept the Council's decision. I was the chosen one, he said, and they had to accept that.

The chosen one?

Even Obi-Wan reacted to those words, staring with surprise at Qui-Gon and then at me.

Yoda would only say that my future was clouded. They couldn't be sure.

I didn't understand. What did they mean by chosen one? Why did I come all this way and leave the only life I knew if I couldn't become a Jedi?

Qui-Gon fought and fought. He said that even if the Council disagreed he would train me as his own Padawan Learner.

Obi-Wan looked shocked. His jaw dropped and for a second I thought he would challenge Qui-Gon. But then he caught himself. I may have imagined it, but for a split second I thought he narrowed his eyes at me before turning to face the Council.

From the looks on the faces of the Council members, I knew that Qui-Gon had gone too far. Yoda said it was impossible for Qui-Gon to take me as an apprentice as long as he already had one. Qui-Gon told the Council that Obi-Wan was ready.

Beside him the younger Jedi nodded and said he was ready to face the trials of becoming a Jedi Knight.

Again, the faces of the Council said that they disagreed. Yoda said he doubted that Obi-Wan was ready, even though Qui-Gon said he had taught the younger Jedi all he could.

Suddenly the discussion stopped. Mace Windu informed the Council that the decision on my future would have to wait. The Senate was voting for a new Supreme Chancellor. Queen Amidala was returning to her home on planet Naboo. This would widen the confrontation with the Trade Federation.

Yoda added that it would also draw out the Queen's attacker. Despite all my mixed-up feelings, I was now certain that Yoda was speaking of the dark warrior. I was scared for the Queen, but I admit I thought of Padme first. Since she attended the Queen, her life would also be in danger.

The councilors spoke in serious tones. One of them said the events were moving too fast. They were really worried. Mace Windu told Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan to go with the Queen to Naboo. He wanted them to protect the Queen and discover the ident.i.ty of the dark warrior.

And then I heard a word I had only heard once before. A thing I doubted truly existed.

Until now.

Tenth Entry

Past and Future

As I've said before, all manner of strange and frightening voyagers pa.s.sed through Tatooine. This included some pretty weird old droids.

One day, about a year before Qui-Gon's ship landed on Tatooine, I was looking for something in Watto's junk heap when I came across an old war droid. This unit was really ancient. It was covered with rusty armor plating and even had a fuse box - something I'd only heard about.

Being curious about old technologies, I dragged it behind the shop and waited until Watto was gone. Then I hooked it up to a universal power source, just to see what would happen. As I suspected, the unit was frozen. Most of its joints had dried up long ago.

But its electronics were still intact and it seemed to have a working holoprojector. I knew Watto would want a working holoprojector, no matter how old it was. He could always peddle it off to some local mechanic trying to build his own droid.

I was in the middle of testing the projector when a holograph burst on. It showed some sort of ancient battle, but the visual projection was really bad. I was disappointed. Maybe the projector wasn't worth salvaging after all.

I was just about to give up when the audio came on. It, too, was very poor quality, and mostly static. But I could hear screams and grunts and panicked shouts. Something about the Sith this and the Sith that. I couldn't really get a handle on what was going on. All I could tell was that whatever these Sith things were, they were very, very bad.

I ran the sequence over and over again, trying to get a look at this Sith thing and figure out what could possibly be so terrible about it.

While the screams of terror chilled me, I was a little bit fascinated and curious. But then the holoprojector stopped working.

I couldn't get those vague sounds and images out of my mind. On my way home that day I pa.s.sed some of the cantinas that lined the marketplace. Sitting outside was a deep-s.p.a.ce pilot I sometimes saw around. According to my friends, he'd landed on Tatooine with no fuel or money and seemed content to spend the rest of his days sitting in the shade out of the twin suns, telling anyone who would listen stories about his life and travels. He was the one who'd first told me about the angels on the moons of lego.

The old s.p.a.cer waved at me, and I went over to chat. I knew he was the real thing because of the Old Republic fighter corps insignia on his tunic. After a few moments I asked him if he'd ever heard of a Sith. To be honest, I expected him to chuckle and shake his head.

Instead, the old s.p.a.cer turned pale. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped. He began looking around with a panicked expression. Where had I heard of them? he wanted to know. Were they back? Were they here on Tatooine?

It took a couple of minutes to explain that I'd simply seen an old holograph. A couple of minutes more pa.s.sed before he calmed down enough to tell me the story.

He said the Sith had come into being thousands of years ago. They were founded by a rogue Jedi Knight who believed that the real Force lay not in the light, but in the dark. He recruited others and trained them in the art of battle. For a time the Sith Lords had been the most fearsome warriors in the galaxy. Fiercer even than the Jedi. Because unlike the Jedi, the Sith were evil and loved war, not peace.

The good news was that their evil eventually turned inward and they began to battle each other. Soon all but a few had been destroyed, and the Jedi were able to get rid of the rest.

Or so it was said. Some people thought that one Sith Lord had survived in secret. Now and then someone would report seeing him, but none of the rumors had ever been proven.

Until now, here in the Jedi Council chamber. I heard the word Sith spoken again. And learned that this was what Qui-Gon thought the dark warrior was.

If Queen Amidala was being stalked by a Sith Lord, I knew she was really in danger! I was so preoccupied with the thought that I barely heard Yoda tell the Jedi Council that my fate as a Jedi would be decided at another time.

Qui-Gon said I would have to stay with him, since I had nowhere else to go. Yoda and the others agreed, but they warned Qui-Gon that while I was to accompany him, I was not to be trained.

When I left the Jedi Council my head was spinning. So much had happened and so many different things had been discussed! I didn't know what to think. There was the doubt over my future as a Jedi. And Obi-Wan's obvious displeasure with me. But also the threat to the Queen and the danger Padme must be facing....

And now I was to go with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan to the planet of Naboo, where they would attempt to protect the Queen against the mysterious and evil Sith Lord. I would be lying if I said I wasn't frightened. But I was also excited to go.

To me, Coruscant had become a place where everyone treated me like a kid. I felt helpless there. I could only hope that it would be different on Naboo.

Coruscant at night is as amazing as it is by day. The whole planet is lit by the lights of its single, sprawling city. I stood on the windy landing platform with Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Artoo-Deetoo. Ever since the Council meeting, the two Jedi had been edgy and uncomfortable with each other. Now, on the platform, their feelings finally came out. I could see the strained looks on their faces as they spoke, but their words were whisked away with the wind.

I wished I could hear what they were saying. Then I remembered how, in the Jedi Temple, they told me to relax and open my mind, and how I'd been able to picture the images from Mace Windu's viewing screen when I did.

I tried to do the same now. The Jedi were probably skilled at masking their thoughts if they suspected someone was listening. But I doubted they would expect that from me. And so I "listened" and learned that Obi-Wan thought the Council would be right in denying me Jedi training. He said the whole Council sensed that I was dangerous.

Dangerous? I had to stop myself from arguing. How could Obi-Wan say I was dangerous? He didn't even know me! But that, I realized, was the whole point. Because Obi-Wan didn't know me, he couldn't be arguing about me personally. It was the idea of me - already nine years old, but with very high midi-chlorians - that he was talking about.

I was very glad when Qui-Gon said that while my fate might be uncertain, I was not dangerous. He reminded Obi-Wan that the Council had not made their final decision.

Then he told the younger Jedi to go on board the Naboo s.p.a.cecraft. Obi-Wan went up the boarding ramp reluctantly.

I was glad he left because I wanted the chance to tell Qui-Gon what I was thinking. That even though I was eager to go to Naboo, maybe I shouldn't. Because of the more serious problems they were facing - the Trade Federation blockade and the threat of the Sith Lord - I didn't want to be in the way.

Qui-Gon a.s.sured me that I wouldn't be a bother. He said he would not go against the Council by training me, but that didn't mean I couldn't watch him and learn. Above all, I was to stay close to him, because that way I would be safe.

It seemed he was waiting for the Queen and in no rush to board the ship, so I asked him about something else that was bothering me. What were midi-chlorians?

Qui-Gon explained that they were microscopic life-forms that lived in all body cells and communicated with the Force. In a way, the two life-forms depended on each other. The midi-chlorians needed us in order to live and we needed them in order to know the Force. He said it was the midi-chlorians that told us the will of the Force and that when I learned to quiet my mind, I would be able to hear them.

From my experience just a few moments before on the landing platform, I was beginning to have a sense of what he meant. I wanted to ask him more, but we were interrupted by the arrival of an air transport carrying the Queen.

Qui-Gon greeted Amidala, who seemed glad to see him. I overheard the Queen say that she was worried that the Trade Federation wanted to destroy her. The Jedi Knight promised her that wouldn't happen.

The Queen had a small group with her, but before I could look for Padme, Jar Jar burst out of the transport and hugged me. All he could talk about was how glad he was to be going home. By the time I managed to get out of his grasp, the Queen and her handmaidens had gone on board.

Later, on the ship, I went looking for Padme and somehow found myself in the ship's control center. This was by far the most advanced c.o.c.kpit I'd ever seen. I wasn't sure how the pilot, Ric Olie, would feel about me hanging around, but he didn't mind at all. In fact, he went over all the controls with me.

The strange thing was that while the Nubian ship had many more controls than any ship I'd seen in Watto's junkyard, the basics were the same. I could identify the thrusters, stabilizers, and repulsors. I don't think Ric Olie would have been so impressed with my knowledge if he'd known how many junked c.o.c.kpits I'd sat in.

I didn't see Padme until the very end of the flight. We'd entered the Naboo atmosphere and were starting to land. When I came out of the hydrolift, the Queen and her people were in the main hold waiting to disembark.

I saw Padme. From the way she carried herself, I could see that she was prepared to fight. I sensed that she was as well trained in warfare as in attending to the Queen. That's when my dream came back to me. Once again I saw Padme leading that huge army, and I knew that she could do it.

Padme seemed surprised to see me. But pleased, too. She told me the Queen had given her my message back on Coruscant. Then she asked what had happened at the Jedi Temple.

I told her the bad news. It appeared that the Council might not allow me to be trained as a Jedi. I could tell she was disappointed. And she looked worried, too. I asked her what was wrong and she said that the Queen had decided that her people had to go to war against the Trade Federation. I told Padme that I might not be a Jedi, but that didn't mean I couldn't help. Padme smiled at me. It was a sad smile. The ship landed with a slight jolt. When the hatch opened, I expected to see a landing pad and some sort of city, but I was in for a surprise. Because all I saw was a swamp.

Eleventh Entry

Another Surprise

For a kid who grew up on the dry planet of Tatooine, seeing a lake for the first time was even more amazing than seeing the Queen. I couldn't believe that there were places where water actually lay on the ground without being instantly evaporated!

I looked around in shock. Here plants could grow wild and out in the open, not in some carefully managed subterranean farm.

Here it was so moist that you could actually feel the dampness on your skin and breathe the heaviness of the water vapor in the air!

Clouds blanketed the sky above and the mist hanging over the lake was the gray of twilight. Surrounding the lake was a swamp. In the distance I could see vast, gra.s.sy hills. All in all, this seemed an even stranger sight than the vas city-world of Coruscant.

Suddenly I felt homesick and alone. Why couldn't Mom be here to see this? And what about Kitster? Mom would look around in wonder. Kitster and I would be running around like crazy, touching the plants and splashing in the lake.

The lake may have been a strange and exotic place to me, but to Jar Jar it was home. With a giant splash he disappeared into the water. Someone said Jar Jar was Gungan. Gungans lived in a city deep below the surface. It seemed the Gungans and the Queen's people had never been friendly. But now Jar Jar was going on behalf of the Queen to plead for help in the battle she was about to face.

It wasn't long before Jar Jar returned to the surface. With lake water dripping off his ears and head, he gave us the bad news. He'd gone to the city, but it was deserted. I saw the worry in the faces around me. Obi-Wan feared that the Gungans had already been wiped out by the Trade Federation forces, but Jar Jar said it was more likely that his people had gone into hiding.

Jar Jar thought he knew where they were and began to lead us through the swamp. As we followed in a line behind him I kept my eyes on Padme and Qui-Gon. I would have been glad to speak to either of them, but both seemed lost in thought.

Meanwhile, I could tell by the grumbling around me that not everyone believed that Jar Jar knew where he was going. After all, this was the creature who seemed incapable of staying out of trouble no matter where he went.

It wasn't long before he stopped, sniffed the air, and said we'd arrived. I looked around, but to me it still looked like a swamp. Jar Jar made some strange chattering sounds and suddenly, out of the dense green undergrowth, half a dozen Gungans appeared wearing uniforms and riding two-legged creatures I later learned were named kaadu.

They were armed with spearlike weapons that looked like long stun guns or electropoles. I a.s.sumed they were on patrol. And they didn't look pleased to find Jar Jar. I was starting to wonder if anyone was ever pleased to run into him. Even worse, when Jar Jar explained that we were there to speak to the boss of the Gungans, the leader of the patrol rolled his eyes and warned him that if we went to the boss Gungan, we would all be in serious trouble.

But Jar Jar insisted, and the leader of the patrol reluctantly agreed to lead us onward.

We followed the patrol leader to a place of ancient gray stone ruins, partly covered by green vines and brush. Jar Jar said this was a secret, sacred place for the Gungans. I looked around, amazed, as we pa.s.sed groups of Gungans. They stared at us with their big eyes. Jar Jar whispered that they were refugees seeking shelter. They had been driven from their city at the bottom of the swamp by the forces of the Trade Federation.

We came to the remains of a huge stone temple that was covered with vines and moss. All that was left of it was crumbling columns and steps. Everywhere you looked were giant Gungan heads carved out of stone. Again, I wished Mom was there. It was all so strange and different.

We stopped before a heavy, sour-looking Gungan seated on a stone. Jar Jar whispered that this was Boss Na.s.s, the chief Gungan. When Boss Na.s.s saw Jar Jar and the rest of us, his broad forehead wrinkled, and his mouth frowned. After all, he was the guy who had banished Jar Jar.

Even when Queen Amidala stepped forward to say that we'd come in peace, Boss Na.s.s shook his head. He warned Jar Jar that he'd made a mistake by bringing us to him, and that he was considering putting us all to death.

In a flash we were surrounded by Gungan guards. They lowered their electropoles at us. I heard the sharp intake of breath among those with the Queen. Realizing we were outnumbered, the Queen's guards looked around nervously. For a moment I went stiff, wondering if I'd come all this way just to die. But I was surprised to see Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan watching calmly, seemingly unbothered by the threat. If they weren't worried, I knew I could relax.

The biggest surprise was still to come. Queen Amidala began to say something about forming an alliance with the Gungans. But Padme stepped forward, cutting her Queen short.

When the Gungan chief asked who she was, Padme said she was the Queen!