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And they learned it. In practice skirmishes, they began to realize how much harder it was to shoot an enemy attacking feet first. As soon as they were convinced of that, they practiced the maneuver more willingly.
That night was the first time Ender had come to a practice session after a whole afternoon of work. He was tired.
"Now you're in a real army," said Alai. "You don't have to keep practicing with us."
"From you I can learn things that n.o.body knows," said Ender.
"d.i.n.k Meeker is the best. I hear he's your toon leader."
"Then let's get busy. I'll teach you what I learned from him today."
He put Alai and two dozen others through the same exercises that had worn him out all afternoon. But he put new touches on the patterns, made the boys try the maneuvers with one leg frozen, with both legs frozen, or using frozen boys for leverage to change directions.
Halfway through the practice, Ender noticed Petra and d.i.n.k together, standing in the doorway, watching. Later, when he looked again, they were gone.
So they're watching me, and what we're doing is known. He did not know whether d.i.n.k was his friend; he believed that Petra was, but nothing could be sure. They might be angry that he was doing what only commanders and toon leaders were supposed to do-- drilling and training soldiers. They might be offended that a soldier would a.s.sociate so closely with Launchies. It made him uneasy, to have older children watching.
"I thought I told you not to use your desk." Rose the Nose stood by Ender's bunk.
Ender did not look up. "I'm completing the trigonometry a.s.signment for tomorrow."
Rose b.u.mped his knee into Ender's desk. "I said not to use it."
Ender set the desk on his bunk and stood up. "I need trigonometry more than I need you."
Rose was taller than Ender by at least forty centimeters. But Ender was not particularly worried. It would not come to physical violence, and if it did, Ender thought he could hold his own. Rose was lazy and didn't know personal combat.
"You're going down in the standings, boy," said Rose.
"I expect to. I was only leading the list because of the stupid way Salamander Army was using me."
"Stupid? Bonzo's strategy won a couple of key games."
"Bonzo's strategy wouldn't win a salad fight. I was violating orders every time I fired my gun."
Rose hadn't known that. It made him angry. "So everything Bonzo said about you was a lie. You're not only short and incompetent, you're insubordinate, too."
"But I turned defeat into stalemate, all by myself."
"We'll see how you do all by yourself next time." Rose went away.
One of Ender's toonmates shook his head. "You dumb as a thumb."
Ender looked at d.i.n.k, who was doodling on his desk. d.i.n.k looked up, noticed Ender watching him, and gazed steadily back at him. No expression. Nothing. OK, thought Ender, I can take care of myself.
Battle came two day's later. It was Ender's first time fighting as part of a toon; he was nervous. d.i.n.k's toon lined up against the right-hand wall of the corridor and Ender was very careful not to lean, not to let his weight slip to either side. Stay balanced.
"Wiggin!" called Rose the Nose.
Ender felt dread come over him from throat to groin. a tingle of fear that made him shudder. Rose saw it.
"Shivering? Trembling? Don't wet your pants, little Launchy." Rose hooked a finger over the b.u.t.t of Ender's gun and pulled him to the forcefield that hid the battleroom from view. "We'll see how well you do now, Ender. As soon as that door opens, you jump through, go straight ahead toward the enemy's door."
Suicide. Pointless, meaningless self-destruction. But he had to follow orders now, this was battle, not school. For a moment Ender raged silently; then he calmed himself. "Excellent, sir," he said. "The direction I fire my gun is the direction of their main contingent."
Rose laughed. "You won't have time to fire anything, pinp.r.i.c.k."
The wall vanished. Ender jumped up, took hold of the ceiling handholds, and threw himself out and down, speeding toward the enemy door.
It was Centipede Army, and they only beginning to emerge from their door when Ender was halfway across the battleroom. Many of them were able to get under cover of stars quickly but Ender had doubled up his legs under him and, holding his pistol at his crotch, he was firing between his legs and freezing many of them as they emerged.
They flashed his legs, but he had three precious seconds before they could hit his body and put him out of action. He froze several more, then flung out his arms in equal and opposite directions. The hand that held his gun ended up pointing toward the main body of Centipede Army. He fired into the ma.s.s of the enemy, and then they froze him.
A second later he smashed into the forcefield of the enemy's door and rebounded with a crazy spin. He landed in a group of enemy soldiers behind a star; they shoved him off and spun him even more rapidly. He rebounded out of control through the rest of the battle, though gradually friction with the air slowed him down. He had no way of knowing how many men he had frozen before getting iced himself, but he did get the general idea that Rat Army won again, as usual.
After the battle Rose didn't speak to him. Ender was still first in the standings, since he had frozen three, disabled two, and damaged seven. There was no more talk about insubordination and whether Ender could use his desk. Rose stayed in his part of the barracks, and left Ender alone.
d.i.n.k Meeker began to practice instant emergence from the corridor-- Ender's attack on the enemy while they were still coming out of the door had been devastating. "If one man can do that much damage, think what a toon can do." d.i.n.k got Major Anderson to open a door in the middle of a wall, even during practice sessions, instead of just the floor level door, so they could practice launching under battle conditions. Word got around. From now on no one could take five or ten or fifteen seconds in the corridor to size things up. The game had changed.
More battles. This time Ender played a proper role within a toon. He made mistakes. Skirmishes were lost. He dropped from first to second in the standings, then to fourth. Then he made fewer mistakes, and began to feel comfortable within the framework of the toon, and he went back up to third, then second, then first.
After practice one afternoon, Ender stayed in the battleroom. He had noticed that d.i.n.k Meeker usually came late to dinner, and he a.s.sumed it was for extra practice. Ender wasn't very hungry, and he wanted to see what it was d.i.n.k practiced when no one else could see.
But d.i.n.k didn't practice. He stood near the door, watching Ender.
Ender stood across the room, watching d.i.n.k.
Neither spoke. It was plain d.i.n.k expected Ender to leave. It was just as plain that Ender was saying no.
d.i.n.k turned his back on Ender, methodically took off his flash suit, and gently pushed off from the floor. He drifted slowly toward the center of the room, very slowly, his body relaxing almost completely, so that his hands and arms seemed to be caught by almost nonexistent air currents in the room.
After the speed and tension of practice, the exhaustion, the alertness, it was restful just to watch him drift. He did it for ten minutes or so before he reached another wall. Then he pushed off rather sharply, returned to his flash suit, and pulled it on.
"Come on," he said to Ender.
They went to the barracks. The room was empty, since all the boys were at dinner. Each went to his own bunk and changed into regular uniforms. Ender walked to d.i.n.k's bunk and waited for a moment till d.i.n.k was ready to go.
"Why did you wait?" asked d.i.n.k.
"Wasn't hungry."
"Well, now you know why I'm not a commander."
Ender had wondered.
"Actually, they promoted me twice, and I refused."
"Refused?"