Duplicity. Part 20

A sly smile barely crept across her perfectly botoxed features. "Oh, I think you know."

I sighed deeply and shook my head, hoping my exasperation was evident. "No. I'm sure I don't." I forced a fake smile, unwilling to let her know her presence bothered me.

She c.o.c.ked her head to one side. "I'm here to talk to you about New York."

"I...I don't know what you mean." So much for her not bothering me.

"Oh, come now, Star. Don't pretend to be as dumb as you look. I know all about Marshall's offer."

I ignored her insult, but an unpleasant shiver traversed my spine. "You? You set that up?"

She laughed, and the mirthless sound recalled to my mind a villain from the movies. "Oh, absolutely not. Why would I do anything good for you?"

Okay, fair point. "Then how...why?"

"I know Marshall Davies. I had no idea he was in the city until I b.u.mped into him at the Balmoral last night. We had drinks, and he happened to mention a talented young female photographer he was trying to contract. When he said your name, I couldn't believe my luck."

I bristled at her words. The fact that Marshall had any connection to that witch made me think more than twice about accepting his business proposal.

I sneered at her. "So, I would be working with a friend of yours?" I couldn't help the scrunching of my nose as if a bad smell had appeared beneath it.

"Marshall is more...how should I put it? More of a business a.s.sociate. You would be insane not to take him up on his offer, Star."

I pushed myself away from the table and began to stand. "Well, thank you for your concern, but I can make up my own mind."

She reached out and grabbed my wrist. "Think about this, Star. It really is the opportunity of a lifetime. You get to move on with your life and do something you love."

I snorted and yanked my arm free. "Meaning I'm out of the way of your son."

She smiled again. "There have to be some perks." Her smile disappeared and she stood to face me. "Look, Star, I don't dislike you, as such. I'm sure you're very sweet in your own quirky little way. But I think Fin needs someone who understands his position in the family. His life. His reputation. If you're gone, I think he could reconcile with this father and move on with his life in a direction befitting him. With someone befitting him."

My eyes began to sting. "My G.o.d. How many insults can you indirectly insert into one G.o.dd.a.m.n monologue?" I placed both hands on the table and leaned toward her. "Isobel, I loved your son. I was in love with him. I didn't care if he had pots of cash or not a single cent. All I cared about was him. His happiness. But he didn't think we could be together, so I think you're safe. It seems you're more bothered about appearances than what your son wants. And believe me when I tell you he has no desire to be back at the firm. No amount of cajoling on your part will change that." My voice wavered. "My break is over. I have to go." I turned and began to walk away.

"He never really loved you, Star." I stopped and turned my head to glare at her as she continued. "He may have thought he did, but it was all an illusion. You were something different. The novelty would have worn off sooner rather than later. Do yourself a favour and save yourself the heartache. Take the opportunity in New York. It's the right thing to do. For both of you." For a split second, I thought I saw compa.s.sion in her eyes, but as if she sensed my awareness, the mask dropped again, and she gave a sly sn.i.g.g.e.r.

Turning away once more, I stormed back inside the coffee shop. Alec was cleaning down the main machine when I stomped past him and into the back room. My eyes were blurry with unshed tears, and I knew he would follow.

Sure enough, he appeared in the doorway seconds after me. "Who was that? Why are you so p.i.s.sed off? Are you crying?"

My chest heaved as I fought the threatening tears of anger that were ready to overflow. "That was f.u.c.king Isobel Hunter." Alec's expression said who? "Fin's witch of a mother."

His nostrils flared. "What did that b.i.t.c.h want?"

"To encourage me to take the New York job offer." I laughed derisively. "She thinks if I'm gone, Fin will reconcile with his father and he'll meet some f.u.c.king lawyery wifey type who's befitting of him, and they'll have little befitting babies, and they'll all live happily ever after in a f.u.c.king house that's befitting of them all." A sob escaped my chest, and I crumpled onto a chair beside the small table in the back room.

Alec dropped to a crouching position before me. "Hey. Hey, Twinkle," he said softly, but I continued to sob. "Star Mendoza, look at me right now!" I jerked my head up at his harsh tone and he cupped my face in his huge palm. "Star, you are the most beautiful, kind-hearted, thoughtful, s.e.xy woman I have ever met. If I wasn't as gay as a teapot, I'd be all over you. If she thinks you're not good enough for her son, that's her problem. You're more than good enough. But you need to move on now. Just like I told him at the gal-"

"What?"

He shook his head and stood quickly. "Nothing. But remember you're-"

"Wait, no. Back up. What were you going to say?"

He plopped back onto the chair opposite me and ran his hands through his hair. "He was at the gallery. On your opening night."

I widened my eyes. "What?"

"He was going to come and speak to you but...I advised him against it."

I clenched my fists and spoke through gritted teeth. "You did what?"

Holding his hands up in surrender, he tried to explain his reasoning. "Look, Star, it was for the best. All he does is break your heart, love. I can't watch him do that to you again. Not for a third time. You deserve better. Don't you agree?"

The bottom suddenly plummeted from my whole world. "And...he just...he walked away?" Tears overflowed from my eyes, and I wrapped my arms around myself.

Alec nodded, his eyes now filled with sadness as he reached out toward me, and unable to touch me, rested his hand on the table. "I think he knows it was for the best too, darling."

It hurt like h.e.l.l, but he was right. If Fin had wanted me, he would've fought for me when his parents attacked me, and he would've ignored Alec's advice and come to me anyway.

So that was it.

We were definitely over.

It was time to move on, after all, and New York was a good way to do that.

Fin After walking away from the opening night of Star's exhibition, I was plagued with dreams about her. She was all I could think about. I was enjoying the work at McKendrick Law, but over the past few weeks, my mind was everywhere except on my work. I should have been concentrating on the Inveresk case, seeing as my father had hinted at a possible loophole to get the case overturned. But it was something I couldn't bring myself to do. For starters, I would have had to figure out the loophole myself. There was no way I could ask him for help after the way I had responded to him after Star left the charity ball. His treatment of her was totally unacceptable, and I would never forgive him for that. I lost her that night because of him, and I was unsure how I would ever win her back. If I could win her back.

The guys from Hydde and I had begun writing our own songs, and we'd been booked for a few more gigs on the back of our first one in the city, thanks to Lily Macrae and her rave review. The only problem was that Star's face appeared every time I closed my eyes, and every song I had penned in the weeks since I'd last seen her echoed the melancholy that tugged at me deep inside.

After several attempts to make her listen to me, I'd had to admit defeat and give things time. I'd talked it through with Tom and Sin, and also with the band. They'd all said the same thing. Allowing the dust to settle would give her a chance to think it all through. Maybe that would result in her giving me a chance to explain. I certainly hoped it would.

Although things changed dramatically in a very short s.p.a.ce of time.

It was the first Sat.u.r.day in August, and I was getting ready to play with the guys at Bannerman's underneath South Bridge. It was a great club with a fantastic atmosphere, and the rest of the band was excited about playing there. My heart wasn't in it, but it was a night when we would be showcasing some of our original material in amongst the covers we loved.

I was showered and ready. The nerves were jangling, and my heart ached at the fact that my favourite supporter was no longer in my life. I could have done with her calming presence and loving words of encouragement.

As I was about to leave, I noticed an envelope on my doormat. It was late in the afternoon, so I figured it had been delivered by hand. I scrunched my brow and opened it quickly in case it was something important. The envelope was typed, and when I pulled out the folded pages, they were too.

I began to read and my heart almost stuttered to a halt...

Dear Fin, How do I start this letter and explain all the changes that have happened in my life recently? It's been a rollercoaster. The exhibition was a great success, but I'm sure you heard all about that from Tom.

On the night of the exhibition, I was presented with an offer I simply can't refuse. A gallery in New York wants to exhibit my work. It's a huge opportunity for me, and so I'm sure you can understand my eagerness to accept it.

Knowing you was fun, and I cared for you. But when all is said and done, it wasn't love. It was just a pa.s.sing phase. A way to pa.s.s the time and enjoy myself. After giving it lots of thought-and in my honest opinion-I now believe your parents were right. I'm just not right for you. You need to be with someone who fits you. Someone who understands your lifestyle in a way I never will.

By the time you read this, I will be on my way to New York to start over, and to see where life takes me. I suggest you do the same.

I wish you well.

All the best, Star I flopped onto the couch and scrunched the pages into a ball. Tears needled my eyes. It was over, and there was no turning back. The letter was so cold and without any expression of emotion. That just wasn't like her. That wasn't the Star I knew. The fact that she had written a d.a.m.ned letter in the first place was a low blow, especially considering the way she had been hurt by Sully the f.u.c.king Sasquatch. Clearly the success of her exhibition had changed her, which was in itself a huge shock. Did I know her at all?

And New York? Why the h.e.l.l would she want to go there when she loved Edinburgh so much? Any dim hopes of reconciliation were snuffed out, and anger bubbled up inside me. Why had she never been willing to listen to my explanation? If she had, she would have known that after the charity ball debacle, I told my parents to f.u.c.k off out of my life for good. That they had no clue how happy she made me, and that I didn't care what they thought. That she was the one I loved and wanted to spend my life with. She would also have known that the reason I had been so dumbfounded was because my father had expressed love for me for the first time in almost twenty-eight years. It was enough to knock me off my feet and scramble my brain for a few moments. But only until it sank in that they were playing a cruel game.

But I'd never had that chance, and so I had to resign myself to the fact that whatever I felt hadn't been mutual. She had returned to the USA, and no matter how much I loved her, I had to let her go.

As I stared at the crumpled pages of the letter, my mind drifted back to the last time I spoke to Isobel and Campbell Hunter.

Campbell's eyes followed Star's retreating form. "Quite the little drama queen, isn't she, your plaything?"

I gritted my teeth and stepped toward him with clenched fists. "Don't you ever speak of my girlfriend that way again. She is the woman I love, and quite frankly, if you don't like her, that's just tough s.h.i.t. I'm in love with her, and she makes me happy. After all these years of waiting for your approval, I think all these sudden expressions of love are a little bit too late, don't you? The reason you've decided you suddenly 'love' me is because I've finally grown a pair of f.u.c.king b.a.l.l.s and stood up to you. I've found someone I want to be with and something I want to do with my life. And you didn't get to choose it. So you can both f.u.c.k off and leave me alone. Write me out of your f.u.c.king will. Please, go ahead and do it. I want nothing from you. Because nothing is what I'm used to. You're both living in f.u.c.king la la land if you think for one second that I would ever come back and work for you. And as for you disowning me, no f.u.c.king need. Because as of this moment, I consider myself an orphan."

I turned and went to find McKendrick to tell him I was leaving. To tell him I had to go find my heart, as Star had left with it firmly in her grasp, and that I had been a total f.u.c.king idiot to let her walk out of the place without me.

Bannerman's was already heaving when we arrived. Nate pulled me to one side once the guys had set up. A look of concern clouded his eyes.

"You're not yourself, mate. What's happened? Have you spoken to Star?"

I laughed without feeling the slightest hint of humour. "Had a letter from her. Talk about a cold-hearted b.i.t.c.h."

His eyes widened. "Why? What did it say?"

"That she's realised she's not right for me, and she's received a better f.u.c.king offer. She's..." I swallowed the ball of anger and emotion that had begun to restrict my throat. "She's gone, Nate. She's left for New York." My voice broke, and I internally berated myself for it.

He gripped my shoulder. "f.u.c.k, Fin. I'm so sorry mate. That's s.h.i.t."

"Yeah, you could say that. I really thought she'd listen. That she'd let me explain. But, well, it's over. She's moving on, and I guess I need to do the same."

Star Edinburgh airport was crowded, and I clung to Alec like he was my lifeline. In a way, he was. He was the one thing I had left in Scotland. But even though his friendship had grounded me all these years, I was no longer attached to the city I once loved. Thanks to Finlay Hunter, my heart was broken, and the only way to heal was to start over.

New York was as good a place as any.

Marshall Davies had organised an apartment for me on the Upper East Side. Quite a prestigious location, from what I'd heard. The photos of the second-floor apartment looked wonderful, and I should have been so excited. Marshall and I had been in regular contact since I had accepted his offer.

Alec had been instrumental in encouraging me to accept the opportunity of a lifetime. He cupped my face in his hands. "If you don't like it, Twinkle, you will always have a home with me, and you can come back any time. But you'll never know if you don't at least try."

His eyes had glistened with tears as he fought to keep his emotions in check, but I loved him for being so positive about the whole thing. I was having so many doubts about my abilities that I appreciated him believing in me enough for both of us.

As my flight was called, I hugged Alec hard. "I'm going to miss you so much." A sob escaped me and tears over-spilled my clenched eyes.

He gripped me back just as tightly. "We'll keep in touch. There's online calling and social media. It'll be like we're not really apart. You'll see." But his voice sounded strangled, as if he was struggling just as much as I was. He mumbled into my hair, "If Fin gets in touch, what should I say?"

I pulled away and gazed up at him. "He won't be in touch. I can guarantee it."

The announcer made the last call for my flight, and I reluctantly made my way toward the gate. A ball of emotion and fear knotted my stomach.

This was it.

My life was about to change dramatically. Again. The one saving grace in it all was the fact that I would at least be on the same continent as my parents again. The flight from Indiana would take just over an hour and a half, and they had already booked to come see me. But the thought of starting over terrified me. I knew no one in the Big Apple. I had never even visited there. I feared how impersonal it might be after the friendliness of Edinburgh.

But I had to go.

Around five hours later, with just over an hour left of the flight, I reached into my bag and pulled out the white envelope that had appeared on my doormat only a few days earlier. The contents still hurt. Every time I read the words, my stomach flipped and churned. But somehow, re-reading it re-iterated the fact that I had made the right decision in leaving Edinburgh.

Dearest Star, I hear your exhibition went well and I'm very happy for you. You are incredibly talented and after seeing the newspaper reviews, I'm glad you received the praise you deserve. I understand you were offered a long-term exhibition in New York's Napier Gallery. You must be so very happy. I wanted to drop you a line and wish you well.

It's a shame things didn't work out between us. But when you think about it, we were never truly meant to be. I want you to know I understand why you wouldn't speak to me after the charity ball, but you have to know my parents were only looking out for me. The fact that they love me warms my heart, and I'm so grateful to have them in my life once again. And I think I maybe have you to thank for that.

Things have been difficult, and I'm so sorry you were dragged into the middle of my mistakes but I now realise that many of my decisions were real errors in judgement. I had no right to use you the way I did, and again, I can only apologise. I've had the opportunity to discuss everything with my parents and they've forgiven me, I just hope you can too someday. I'll be taking back my position within the family firm too. My rightful place.

I sincerely wish you the very best in all your New York endeavours and hope that you meet someone who can love you as much as you deserve. I'm sorry I couldn't.

All the best for the future, Fin I folded the paper with shaking hands and stuffed it back in the envelope as my heart broke all over again. I hated that he had written a letter, but I suppose my unwillingness to talk to him had forced his hand. The letter was so matter of fact. So final. I wish you all the very best in your New York endeavours. Jeez, what was it, a job rejection? He may as well have said, "we sincerely hope you find gainful employment very soon". If this was the real Fin Hunter then I'd had a lucky escape.

Okay, so that was a lie.

I still loved him, and it hurt like h.e.l.l fire to know it was over. Every single lie he'd told me came back to haunt me. He'd never loved me. I'd been some kind of fun distraction whilst he rebelled against his parents and found himself.

Clearly, the duplicitous personality wasn't just connected to his love of music. I felt humiliated. Like he was laughing at me. Poor Star, the silly American barista girl with the crush on the high-flying lawyer who was way out of her league.

G.o.d, how pathetic.

The plane eventually began its descent into JFK, and the lights in the cabin dimmed. Tears trailed in streaks down my face as I gazed out over the twinkling lights of my new home.

Home.

That word was never farther from the way I felt than right then.

Fin I sat staring out of my office window at the mult.i.tude of architectural styles of the city. Star had been gone from the UK for around a month. But even though she had left my country, she most certainly never left my heart or my mind. And as difficult as it was to admit it to myself, I knew I'd been a coward. I should have spoken to her. Made her listen to me.

The folks of Edinburgh carried on with their everyday lives in the city below, and I envied every single one of them who could focus on normal things. Obviously, I'm not omnipotent, and I had no idea how many of those people down there were suffering something similar to my fate, but I would've gladly traded places with any one of them. At least a new pain would have been something different.

My intercom buzzed, dragging me from my pity party for one, and I hit the buzzer. "Yes, Fiona?"

"Finlay, Miss Drummond is here to see you."

"Great. Thanks, Fiona. Please send her in."

I stood and walked around my desk, ready to hug Elise when she walked through the door. She looked lovely. Very fresh-faced, and it was good to see. Before she could say a word, I pulled her into my arms.

"Whoa! Is someone happy to see me?" She giggled and hugged me back.

"I sure am, Liss."