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'Maybe she just wanted a hostage,' said Bob.
'That doesn't make sense,' said Peri. 'Why grab someone you'd have to carry? She could have got Chick, or the Doctor.'
'Something is going on here that we don't understand,'
said the Doctor. 'And the reluctance of our friends the Eridani to be more specific is the root of our troubles. But there's not much we can do about them. What was that program that attacked the Apple II? What has she cooked up with alien help? Swan's our target.'
'Uh, excuse me,' said Bob, 'but she just tried to use us us for target practice.' for target practice.'
'We have to know what's in her computer,' said the Doctor. 'All our sophisticated attacks have failed. I think it's time to try something a little cruder.'
Swan had two phone calls to make. Luis seemed happy to keep playing with the Meccano set she had given him, so she went downstairs, settled into the chair at the kitchen table, and picked up the receiver.
The first call was to my editor 'There's someone I'd like to suggest you talk to,' she said. 'A former colleague of Mr Peters. Oh, of course, it's up to you. But let me give you the details' She did, and then listened while my boss told her he had no intention of calling some guy long-distance and interrupting his Christmas break. 'Come on,' she said. 'Aren't your journalistic instincts itching? I just spoke to him myself.
And do you know what he told me?'
She told him. My editor made that call.
Swan's second call was to Bob Salmon's boss. He didn't answer his work phone, so she tried his home number. After three rings he picked up.
'I'm afraid I have some bad news about one of your employees,' she told him. 'Robert Salmon was caught trespa.s.sing in my company's offices and in my company's computers. Now, I am willing not to go ahead with charges if you'll take action against him yourself.'
'I'm very shocked to hear this, Miss Swan. Bob has been an excellent worker. He's a bright young man. If the department decides to dismiss him, I'm going to be very sorry to lose him.'
'It's up to you, of course,' said Swan. 'I understand you may not be able to make a decision until the new year. Just call me back at this number when you do.'
Swan hung up and sat back in her chair. She was back in control, she was on top of the world. She had Luis and we had nothing. She had hurt us, and she could go on hurting us. She had been on the police radio on the way home, using a device which lowered her voice's pitch until it sounded like a man, confusing the reports until they would never know who the crazy lady with the shotgun was. She was untouchable.
Back at my flat, Mr Salmon was staring at the phone. 'I cannot believe I just made a prank phone call.'
'You didn't make a prank call, Dad!' said Bob. 'A prank call is when you phone a guy at the bowling alley and ask if he has ten-pound b.a.l.l.s. Swan called us.'
Mr Salmon took out his handkerchief and dabbed his forehead. 'She sure was fooled,' he said. 'That's bought you a few more days, son. But she's going to be even madder when she realises she was tricked.'
The Doctor said, 'Miss Swan is going to have more important things to deal with. I guarantee it.'
Mr Salmon patted Bob on the head and went back to work.
Mondy emerged from the street after fifty-seven minutes, pushed the manhole lid back into place, and walked over to my car carrying his tapedeck and his trio of traffic cones. He sat down in the back and thumbed the 'play' switch. The tapedeck served up a bunch of beeping, roaring, and hissing.
He was waiting for me to ask him what it was. But I already knew: it was the sound of a modem, the sound of someone dialling up a computer from a distance. Computers talk over the phone in what sounds like static or an angry cat, but is actually a firehose explosion of zeroes and ones blipping over the lines.
'You taped Swan calling up her work account from home,'
I said. Mondy nodded. 'How does that help us? We don't speak computer.'
'Yeah, but other computers do. As soon as I play this back in my computer, we'll have Swan's pa.s.sword. It's a crude method, but I can usually get it to work. Then we just stroll into her account through the front door.'
And grab the Savant program. 'Perfect. Let's get to your mom's house.' I pulled out. The late-night traffic was quiet.
After a while, Mondy piped up from the back seat. 'Is it true?'
'Is what true?'
'What Swan said about you. I listened to her talking to your boss.'
'You tape that?'
'Nah,' said Mondy. 'No, seriously, I rewound the tape and recorded over it. The computer was all I was interested in.'
There was a long pause. 'Well, is it?'
'What do you think?'
'I think it's obvious bulls.h.i.t. I think your boss will say it's obvious bulls.h.i.t. I don't think you have anything to worry about, man.'
'Hope you're right,' I said.
Mondy played the recording again, as though he could fish Swan's pa.s.sword right out of the meaningless hiss with modem ears. 'The really simplest thing to do would be to play it back over the phone to her own computer. I've done that when I was in a hurry. It even worked a couple of times.'
'Mondy?'
'Yeah?'
'It is true.'
He slid down in the seat. 'Jeez Louise.'
My phone rang again. Peri said, 'Should we answer it?'
The Doctor shook his head. 'Mr Mond may not have restored the phone lines to their original state yet. Better to let it ring out.
They all jumped when my answering machine picked up.
Bob grabbed for the stop b.u.t.ton, but the Doctor caught his hand. 'Too late,' he said.
'Chick?' It was my editor. He named the west-coast journalist he had just been talking to. 'Not to put too fine a point on it,' he says you're, uh, a woman. The guy says, he, uh, saw it with his own eyes. Look, this is nuts. Will you call me back? Bye.'
Five minutes later a boggled Mondy and I walked into my apartment. The Doctor was working at the Apple. Peri and Bob were still staring at the answering machine.
Peri and Bob looked up at me, and I knew right away what had happened. I could see their eyes adjusting like the lens of a camera as they saw me for the first time. They both opened and closed their mouths like goldfish.
'Oh, spit it out,' I said, without taking the cigarette out of my mouth.
'You're a transvest.i.te!!!' said Bob.
'Bulls.h.i.t.' I could feel my hands curling into fists inside my jacket pockets. For G.o.d's sake, don't lose it. 'I'm a man.
Same as you.'
Bob said, 'I think there's a little little difference ' and then broke off, blushing. Peri actually laughed. The tension in the room broke a little. Mondy sat down next to the Doctor and loaded his ca.s.sette tape into the Apple's player. difference ' and then broke off, blushing. Peri actually laughed. The tension in the room broke a little. Mondy sat down next to the Doctor and loaded his ca.s.sette tape into the Apple's player.
I pulled my cigarettes out of my pocket. I really needed a smoke. 'You've got some funny ideas about what makes a man, boy.' I glanced at the Doctor. He was either too embarra.s.sed to join in the conversation, or didn't give a toss.
Or maybe he was just disgusted.
Stay cool. Don't give them anything. 'Where are we at?'
'We're in,' announced the Doctor. 'I'm looking at Swan's system right now.'
With relief, Bob shot over to his side. 'Look,' he said.
'She's uploading a TARred copy to another system. Maybe a backup? To keep it off her home machine in case the authorities take a look?'
The Doctor was shaking his head. 'No. Remember what it tried to do to our little computer?'
'Oh my G.o.d,' said Bob. 'It's uploading itself.'
'Once it copies itself to that new host, it will seize control.
Send more copies of itself to more machines.' He sprang to his feet. 'There's nothing we can do from here. Quickly! We have to get to her minicomputer and stop it.'
'You want to break into her house again?' I said from the doorway as they ran into the hall.
Bob said,'We've got nothing to lose.'
'We have the world to lose,' said the Doctor. They hurtled down the stairs.
I stood there alone for about two minutes. My hands shook a little as I lit a new smoke. It was all happening again, Sydney again, Los Angeles all over again. Every time I promised myself I would never have to go through it again. It was like one of those bad dreams that come back just when you've forgotten the last time.
The phone rang. I s.n.a.t.c.hed it up. 'Yeah?'
'I want you,' said Swan, 'to tell me everything the Doctor knows.'
My voice had turned into a growl. 'Lady, why the h.e.l.l should I help you? You've already cost me my job.'
'Because I can do worse. Your old friend in Los Angeles is still p.i.s.sed off with you. He's more than happy to tell anyone, any supermarket tabloid, about his encounter with the she-male freak from Aussie. ' She p.r.o.nounced it Awsss-ee'.
'Jesus, Swan' I said. 'The Savant thing is dead. Or broken, or whatever. Its original owners have already taken it back.
There's nothing left that I can give you.'
'All I want from you is information. The Doctor knows a lot more about all this than he's deigned to tell me. I want you to tell me everything you know. Or I make you a star. Take it or leave it.'
'All right,' I said. 'All right. Keep your hat on, well talk.
Where are you right now?'
'At my house. You know where it is.'
'Not there,' I said. I named a diner in Rockville. 'I can be there in half an hour.'
'All right.'
'You can pay for the coffee.'
Swan was amused. She could afford to be. 'My pleasure.'
I chucked the phone into the kitchen, where it knocked a bunch of dirty coffee cups off the counter. It all landed on the floor in a satisfying explosion. When I saw Swan, so help me if I wasn't ready to hit a girl.
The Doctor broke a window, opened a door and pounced on the minicomputers 'Where's it sending itself to?'
'The university's machine,' said Bob.
'It'll be all over the country in a couple of days. We'll never be able to stuff it back into the bottle.'
'Is there still enough time?!' said Bob.
'I think so,' said the Doctor. 'Look. It's only uploading itself at 300 baud.'
'My G.o.d; said Bob sourly. 'We have only hours.'
'Let's not risk a nasty surprise,' said the Doctor. They b.u.mped shoulders at the keyboard. The Doctor started hammering at the keys. 'It's useless! The system's ignoring input.'
'Uh, guys?' said Peri.
They both looked up at her. She was holding up the Eclipse's power cord, which she had unplugged from the wall.
They both looked back down at the screen. 'It's still going!'
said Bob.
'There must be an alternative power source, said the Doctor.
'She's got a UPS,' said Bob.