Desire: A Novel Part 20

She left me to sleep after piling me with more painkillers. As I waited for them to kick in, I thought about Devon. He had stayed with me. That had to mean something, didn't it? I was sure I felt him kiss my forehead last night, but I was on some pretty heavy medication. I could have dreamt it.

Wincing in pain as I rolled off my back, I let myself fall back to sleep.

Ara arrived shortly after ten the next morning, once I'd been given the all clear from the doctor. I must have still looked a mess, because she gasped when she saw me.

"You sure you're ready to go?" Ara looked doubtful as I dressed myself. I winced in pain. My bruised ribs were freaking sore, my head ached, but I couldn't stay a moment longer in this hospital. It seemed every time I dozed off to sleep, the nurse would wake me to take my vitals.

"I'm sure." I replied dryly, "You haven't heard from Devon?" I said uncertainly, sure the answer would be no. Ara shook her head.

"Not since he came to tell me what happened." She sat down on the edge of the bed with me, "He was really cut up, Kait. I think seeing you hurt like that really shook him up."

"Maybe." I mumbled.

Or maybe he was cut up about the fact that I'd been working as a hooker. The latter seemed much more likely to me.

"Ara, you should have seen his face when he got there. I can't even put into words the mix of disappointment and shame I knew he was feeling. But then he spent half the night here, while I slept." My mind ached as I tried to figure him out.

Ara punched my arm, hard. A red welt appeared in its wake.

"Hey." I glared at her, rubbing my arm, "That hurt."

"Good." Ara shrugged. What the h.e.l.l was her problem? "You need to stop this. You have two kids sitting at home who are worried sick about you, and you're pining over some guy who obviously can't, for whatever reason, appreciate you." She was right, I just didn't want her to know that I knew she was right.

"Fine." I said icily, "Can we go now?" Ara rolled her eyes, offering to help me stand up. I shook her off. I didn't need her help. I eased myself onto my feet, pain surging through my stomach, taking my breath away momentarily.

"For f.u.c.k's sake, Kait." Ara grabbed my arm and steadied me. I grudgingly let her lead me out of the hospital.

Chapter Thirty-Two.

Neri and Sam both sat anxiously on the couch waiting for me as I walked in. Looking at their scared expressions I felt a pang of guilt. How could I have been so stupid? If something had happened to me, they both would have ended up in foster care.

"Hi guys." I smiled, trying to let them know I was okay. I wondered what they had been told about what had happened.

"Are you okay?" Neri asked. Sam looked at me, his big eyes filled with worry. His bottom lip quivered as he took in my bloodied and bruised face. Poor kids. I'd almost died from shock when I'd seen my face in the mirror, I could only imagine how I looked to them.

"I'm fine. It looks much worse than it actually is." I smiled, ignoring the ache moving my mouth caused, "The doctors say it will heal up fine. I'll be as good as new." I joked, trying my best to lighten the mood. Neri smiled, I think out of politeness. Both still looked just as shocked.

"What happened?" Neri asked quietly.

"I was attacked as I left work." I answered honestly, leaving as many of the details out of it as possible. Neri's face was creased with concern as she took in all my cuts and bruises.

"Does it hurt?"

"Yes." I admitted, "But I should feel much better in a day or so."

"And your job?" Neri asked, "I don't want you going back there, Kait. What if he'd hurt you worse? What if he comes back? And your license..." The color drained from her face. "What if he comes here?" She panicked.

s.h.i.t. I hadn't considered in saying it was a mugging that my license would be in my purse.

"Hey. Neri, it's okay." I reached out and touched her hand, "They caught him. Security caught him as he was attacking me. He doesn't know where I live."

Neri looked mildly convinced. She nodded, even smiling a little, "I'm glad you're okay, Kait."

After sitting with the kids for a while, I went to lie down. Ara helped me into bed.

"Ara, I'm so sorry about before. I was being a b.i.t.c.h." Ara's face softened.

"No you weren't, Kait. I shouldn't have snapped. You're allowed to feel sorry for yourself." She climbed into the bed next to me and hugged me, "Luke's coming home tomorrow." She added.

"Ara! That's wonderful! I'm so happy for you." If anyone deserved some good news, it was Ara. I was so happy for her, I knew she had been missing Luke a lot. "When did you find out? How long is he home for?"

"He called yesterday. He is home for a month, then back out for six months, and then home for good." She grinned. I squealed and hugged her again.

"I'm so happy for you." I repeated, "That is just the best news."

"I will wake you for dinner." I nodded and watched her leave. Huddling down under the covers, I gave in to my throbbing head and closed my eyes. Images of Charlie hovering over me flashed through my mind. I couldn't believe how close I'd come to being raped. How far would he have gone? He was pretty d.a.m.n angry. Would he have killed me? I shuddered at the thought. I began to cry. How had things gone from so good to so messed up?

"Kait."

My eyes fluttered open as I was dragged out of my dream. It was a nice dream. I was on a beach, the hot sand felt amazing as I ran my toes through it. Devon was there, kissing me. Holding me. Now the only face I saw was Ara's.

"What?" I mumbled, turning away, desperate to get back to my dream.

"Kait, wake up. Devon is here." That got my attention. My eyes sprung open as I looked around the room. I couldn't see him. "He's in the living room." Ara said, seeing my confused look.

Oh. I struggled to sit up, letting Ara place my bathrobe around my shoulders. My stomach fluttered, but not from pain. This was excitement. He'd come to see me. As I walked into the living room I caught sight of Devon sitting on the couch. I stopped, all the joy rushing from me. He wasn't alone. He was with the older man from yesterday. This wasn't a social call. I sat down.

"h.e.l.lo Kaitlin, how are you feeling?" I cringed at the formality in his voice. He wouldn't even look at me. And what was this Kaitlin business?

"Fine. I'm fine thanks." I cleared my throat.

"We need a statement from you regarding yesterday's attack, if you're up for that." Devon said.

Oh. So that was why he was here. He wasn't here to see me, he was here because he had to be.

"Uh, sure." I propped myself up on the couch with pillows, not meeting Devon's eyes.

"Can you tell us what happened? What you remember?" The older man addressed me, while Devon sat, pen poised on his notepad, eyes down.

"I had gone into work for my pay check. I'd just resigned, and was picking up my final pay." I began, sneaking a glance at Devon. His mouth was in a tight line, and his expression was hard. I fought back tears, "Charlie came in while I was there."

"You knew Charlie, then?" Detective Maslow asked. I nodded.

"He was my English lit professor, and also my, uh, client." I looked down as the words tumbled out of my mouth.

I didn't want to know whether Devon was looking at me, and I sure didn't need to see his face to know he was angry. I could feel it.

"How long was Charlie a client of yours?" Detective Maslow asked.

"A few weeks maybe? He was my only client." I added, my face flaming. I knew that probably made no difference, evidence wise, I just wanted to make sure Devon knew that.

"Kaitlin, it's okay. You're not on trial here. He's the one who attacked you." Detective Maslow spoke in a soft voice, his expression sympathetic.

I almost laughed. I'm not on trial? Tell that to Devon!

"Go on." He pressed.

"I started the job as a receptionist after Neri and Sam came to live with me. I'm in my final year of college, so I needed something flexible to work in with the kids and my schooling. I didn't realize where the job was when I first had the interview. The people were lovely though, and it paid well. So I took it. The job, that is." I paused as Devon let out something that sounded like a cross between a laugh and a cough. I shot him a look. He looked down, avoiding my eyes. Detective Maslow raised an eyebrow at Devon, who shrugged.

"Sorry." He muttered, c.o.c.king his head to the side, eyes still firmly planted on his notepad.

"So Neri needed money for a camp. She told me it was going to cost ten grand. Some pre-med camp that was going to pretty much guarantee her entry into Yale." I added, quickly, realizing that it sounded like one h.e.l.l of an expensive camp.

"When Charlie walked in, I was embarra.s.sed and shocked. But then he asked for me. He offered me a grand for a standard appointment. One grand for half an hour. I'd put my siblings through so much, I just wanted to be able to give her this." My voice shook as I took a moment to breathe.

Do not cry, I begged myself.

"So you went to pick up your pay?" Said Detective Maslow. I glanced at him gratefully.

"Yes. Charlie came in. He was so angry when I told him I had left. He went to hit me, so Barry, the security guard, threw him out." I took another deep breath. What came next was blurry.

"I left shortly after. Barry walked me to my car, but then I realized I'd left my purse inside. I was only a few feet from the door, so I raced over. He came out from behind the building, grabbed me, and...I-I kind of blacked out." My voice choked.

Ara wrapped her arms around me, kissing my cheek. I jumped, not realizing she was in the room. She sat down next to me, holding my hand.

"I remember him saying *I couldn't just cut him off'. If I wouldn't give it to him, he'd take it because I was just a wh.o.r.e." I mumbled softly.

The tears began to roll down my cheeks. I wiped them away, more quickly replacing them. "He hit my head against the concrete. I remember him ripping my skirt..." I shuddered at the memory, it was almost like he was on me again.

"I'm sorry, I don't remember anything after that." I wiped away the few tears that had run down my chin.

Detective Maslow smiled sympathetically at me. I stole a look at Devon. His face remained emotionless. I felt a pang of anger as I realized he was doodling in the corner of his notepad.

Was my story that boring to him, or did he just not really give a s.h.i.t?

"We will be in touch. If you remember anything else, let myself or Detective Walkerson know." He handed me a card. I nodded and smiled at him, completely ignoring Devon as he walked past me.

After they had gone, I released my anger, "Can you believe that?" I raged at Ara, "I'm sorry, but I'm past feeling bad about what happened. He is a f.u.c.king a.s.shole. Did you see him sitting there?"

Ara nodded, "Give him time, Kait. I'd tell you just to forget about him, but I can see you're not going to do that." She hugged me, tucking tear stained strands of hair behind my ears, "Come-on."

"I think I need a nap." I replied glumly. How much time was he going to need to move past this?

Chapter Thirty-Three.

A week had pa.s.sed since the attack.

Slowly, I was beginning to feel better. I could at least get myself out of bed now, and shower without Ara's help. Sam no longer looked at me like I was something that had been dragged out of a swamp, and Neri could look me in the eye without almost bursting into tears.

Today I had the house to myself. Ara was at college, and the kids were at school. The police had filled the college in on what had happened with Charlie. He had been fired (which I guess was expected when you were arraigned without bail on attempted rape and aggravated a.s.sault charges).

I had been given a leave from my cla.s.ses, and with only my exams left, I could take them when I was fully recovered, and still graduate at the end of the year.

I set myself up in the living room, pillows and blankets, with the TV playing old movies, just as I used to when I was little. The only difference was mom wasn't here to feed me chicken soup and flat lemonade.

There had been no further news on mom, or Michael. After telling Neri and Sam repeatedly that no news was good news, I was starting to believe it myself. I rolled over onto my side, wincing in pain as the pressure hit my ribs. I didn't care what anyone said, bruised ribs were just as painful as broken ones.

I hadn't seen or heard from Devon all week.

As much as I tried to tell myself I didn't care, I did. I was hurt. Maybe I had done the wrong thing, and yes, I probably should have told him, but he was being a d.i.c.k by not talking to me.

My heart leapt as the doorbell rang.

Struggling to my feet, I pushed the feelings of hope away, the hope that it was Devon. Maybe he'd forgiven me? Or at least come to talk to me in a civilized manner. Like an adult.

I opened the door, unable to stop the disappointment from showing in my face.

"I'm used to disappointment and regret when people see me, but even that look was harsh." An unusually tall man with a moustache smiled down at me. Next to him was a middle aged woman. Both dressed in suits, the man held out an ID badge, "I'm Officer Stanley Harris, and this is Officer Melinda Murphy."

The FBI.

"Sorry, I thought you might be someone else." I forced a smile, "Come in."

"You don't look to be in the best shape, Ms Delancy, I presume?" I nodded, my brow furrowing. I'd just a.s.sumed they would have heard about the attack from the police. Not that I knew how these things worked.

"Call me Kait." I said, "I was attacked last week." I added settling myself on the couch once again. "I'm okay." I a.s.sured him, seeing his concerned expression.

"I'm sorry to hear that. Is this a bad time?"

"It depends on what you want...or what you want to tell me." I added, hoping they'd get the hint that the last thing I needed right now was bad news. I watched as the two of them exchanged a look.

I knew that look. It was the same look I gave Ara whenever Sam said or did something inappropriate, which was often.