Conservative Affairs Part 5

She steadied her nerves and gripped the edge of her desk. "She won't be coming in today," Jo continued. "She needs some time to sort things out."

Jo surveyed the crowd in front of her desk. No one had moved. "That's all," she said, frustration rising in her tone. Like bewildered puppies, they turned and tried to find their ways back to their respective desks. Clearly, this situation had shaken the entire office.

Finally Gabe was the only one remaining. "Meet me in Ian's office in two minutes," she whispered before he could speak. "And bring Jacquelyn." He nodded and left to find the communications director.

Jo was unsure of what she was doing or how she had gotten involved in this whole mess in the first place. She was not a senior staffer, not by any means at the top of the pecking order, but somehow she was in this up to her neck and she knew she needed to confer with the top staffers. Standing, she walked past Madeline's office to the office where Ian Thompson, the mayor's chief of staff, who had flown back into town late last night, was waiting, along with Gabe and Jacquelyn.

She entered and closed the door. Normally, she'd wait to be greeted and exchange pleasantries, but there was really no point in doing that this morning. They needed to know what was happening. As soon as she saw Ian nod, then, she started filling him in.

"I don't know if I overstepped yesterday," Jo began. "If so, I apologize. I just knew that Mayor Stratton needed someone to make sure that she was okay."

"No need, Jo, none at all. I actually wanted to thank you for what you did." Ian waved his hand, dismissing her concern. "A lot has happened while I've been gone, and I appreciate all three of you taking the initiative. Under any other circ.u.mstances, I would have been here running this show so you didn't have to pick up the slack."

The three of them stood silent, unsure how to respond since the death of one of Ian's family members was involved.

Without waiting for a reply, he took a seat and continued. "The fact of the matter is that I'm here now, and I think that we can proceed without too much of a media circus. How is she doing now?"

"Well, she's not coming in today. I had Gabe cancel her meetings, because she looked like she needed some rest."

"That's probably best. Good call, Jo. Where is she? Did you take her home last night or to a hotel? Does she need a car to go pick her up?"

Jo had hoped not to get into this. "Actually, she's at my place. She didn't want to go home last night, and she fell asleep before I could take her to a hotel."

If Ian felt awkward about the situation, he didn't let on at all. "Well, I guess that works," he said. "But what's her long-term plan? She'll have to face it all eventually. I'll cover things on the political front, but she'll need to figure out what she's comfortable with as far as a long-term solution for her living situation."

"Yes, I know, but I think we should give her some time. She can crash with me for a couple more nights if it helps her keep things together right now."

"What the h.e.l.l? Are you two roommates now or something?" Jacquelyn's voice was just short of a shriek.

"No," Jo tried to explain calmly. "She simply didn't want to go home."

"I just think it's weird, that's all. You know, the new girl sweeps in and decides to play superhero, leaving the rest of us out of the loop. Don't you think, Ian?"

Jealousy was written all over Jacquelyn's face.

"It's not weird, Jacquelyn," Ian said. "It's nice and actually strategic. Jo's stepping up to the plate and taking care of the boss, all the while keeping the mayor out of the public eye. I think it's a good solution for the time being."

"Me too," Gabe offered.

"Well, I think it's odd," Jacquelyn scoffed. "You know, some of us have been with her for years." She turned and looked pointedly at Jo. "Years, Jo. You don't just get to come in, save the day and keep her from the rest of us." With that, she stormed out of the office, leaving Jo speechless and the men confused.

Jacquelyn was sure of one thing-Jo wouldn't last much longer around here. She'd make certain of that. Before yesterday, Jacquelyn had been the one Madeline turned to if she needed anything. From wardrobe malfunctions -"I left my suit jacket at home, Jacquelyn. Will you run over there and grab it?"-to developing complex strategic gra.s.sroots operations for her initiatives, she had depended on Jacquelyn. Other than Ian, she had been on staff the longest, even through the campaign. And now, in the course of one day-one unfortunate turn of events-she seemed to have lost her seniority. She couldn't put her finger on why it bothered her so much, but she hated being out of the loop, in the dark.

Who was this Jo Carson anyway? She hadn't even been here a full year, and other than the few times she had gone out for drinks with the rest of the office, no one seemed to know much about her. That didn't seem to stop them from falling all over themselves any time she entered a room, though. Everywhere she went men's eyes seemed to follow. h.e.l.l, even some of the women stared. They were jealous, no doubt, wishing they looked that much like a supermodel. Jacquelyn sighed, looking down at the extra pounds her midsection was carrying. As for the men, it wasn't hard to guess what they were wishing.

Jo's charms, it seemed, had worked even on the toughest of them in the office-Madeline. Jacquelyn was not about to stand idly by, however, and watch the hard work of the last few years go down the drain. Madeline was her ticket to the political career she wanted. As Madeline's right-hand man, so to speak, Jacquelyn was positioned to move up the political ladder. Soon she'd be able to run for office on her own.

Unless Jo got in the way, of course. To prevent that, Jacquelyn was going to find out whatever she could about her and make sure that she didn't disrupt the natural flow of the office-or of Jacquelyn's career.

The place smelled like a frat house. That was Madeline's first waking thought.

"Where the h.e.l.l am I?" she whimpered, praying there would be no reply. Cautiously she opened her eyes-slamming them shut immediately afterward when she felt the pounding in her head increase.

Something licked her in the face. She jumped, knocking a dog onto the floor. It took a moment before she recognized him.

"Oh, sorry, Jaws," she said, rubbing her eyes. It was all coming back to her now.

Shame swept over her as she remembered how much she had drunk last night in front of Jo. And, even worse, why she was here.

John had cheated. As if hearing it for the first time, she let the news wash over her again, staining her body and her mind. She let herself sink into the feelings of failure and betrayal it generated.

Tears fell from her eyes, and Jaws climbed back into her lap.

"Thank you, little one," she said, ruffling the hair on his head. She took a deep breath, steadying her emotions. Looking around, she wondered again what she was doing here. Refusing to go home-that had been the correct decision. But she should have asked Jo to take her to a hotel instead of barging into her apartment and crashing on her couch.

Jo had invited her, though. Madeline remembered the compa.s.sion in Jo's eyes, the way she listened intently and saw to it that she had everything she needed last night. The tender way she had wiped away her tears and held her close when she broke into tears in her office.

Taking her time, she a.s.sessed the situation. There was no need to feel ashamed for staying here last night. She had been drunk, and Jo had offered her friendship. Although she normally wouldn't have liked to have been such a mess in front of a staff member, under the circ.u.mstances it was understandable.

Tonight she would stay in a hotel and regroup. Right now, though, she was stuck. Her car was at the office. As was Jo's probably. She had no way of going anywhere.

Dizzily, she stood and saw the note Jo had left her. Her meetings had been canceled for the day, and she could take some time to delve into her feelings and consider how to move forward. Jo's kindness made her smile.

Madeline made her way to the kitchen for a gla.s.s of water. Perhaps she would watch some television or read a book. She never took the time for those kinds of leisure activities anymore, and she needed something to occupy her mind. She perused Jo's shelves of DVDs, spotting the case for The L Word, Season One, again, complete with its provocative cover.

She laughed. That brought back a few memories. "Why not? Right, Jaws?" she asked and then laughed again. She was losing her mind, talking to a dog and getting ready to watch a show about out and proud lesbians.

Jo had had every intention of sitting down to plan Madeline's week with Ian, Gabe and Jacquelyn, but after Jacquelyn stormed out of the office, everything had seemed off-kilter somehow. She knew it shouldn't bother her, but the way Jacquelyn had stared at her when she left had unnerved her. "You'll be sorry," Jacquelyn's icy glare had seemed to say.

Once she was gone, though, they managed to sort things out for the most part. Ian, in his usual brilliant way, had developed an all-encompa.s.sing plan for differing scenarios. Informed by as much information as he could grab from quiet sources-and without causing a bigger flurry in the media-he had covered almost every possible angle. Per Ian's instruction, unless Madeline specifically wanted to keep any of her previously scheduled appointments, they were canceling the rest of the week. Gabe and Jacquelyn would attend events in her place and read a letter from the mayor.

Media calls would be handled as always, except those related to John's infidelity. To those calls, the answer was still "no comment." If the media sharks persisted-as they had been doing relentlessly-calls would be directed straight to Ian.

Their strategy was to move ahead full force, just without the boss. Since Ian also served as her campaign manager in his "off" hours, he would handle all campaign communications-should any arise. Anything that needed her signature would simply have to wait until next week. Everything else they would tackle as a team, taking one day at a time. Ian would handle everything the mayor usually called the shots on, and Jo would draft the letters or statements that needed to be sent out. In addition to appearing in the mayor's stead, Jacquelyn would handle all media queries and Gabe would figure out how to deal with important meetings that needed to be rescheduled in the midst of Madeline's personal tragedy.

Jo returned to her desk and quickly crafted templates for all contingencies she could envision cropping up. When she was done, Ian and Gabe told her to spend the rest of the day tending to Madeline and helping her get settled in wherever she chose to stay. They suggested a hotel near City Hall. Jo decided she would present Madeline with options-Jo would take her to a hotel, she could continue to stay at Jo's or she could go home.

All the options were fine with Jo, although if she were being honest with herself, she had to admit she wanted Madeline to stay. There was something invigorating about having another person in the apartment, even if it was close quarters and even though it meant having to keep a secret from her.

There was a warmth about Madeline, even when she was upset, that made the thought of going home more enticing to Jo. That transformed a lifeless s.p.a.ce into something like the sanctuary she wanted it to be.

On the drive across town, Jo figured it was as good a time as any to pick up her phone and call her father. He had been calling all day, but she simply had not had the time or the energy to deal with him.

Her hands shook slightly as she hit the speed dial b.u.t.ton that would connect her with him, wishing that she could avoid it, but also knowing that his persistence wouldn't fade. Unlike the media, this was a call she couldn't ignore.

The phone hadn't even completed its first ring when she heard him pick up.

"Hey." His voice was rushed with antic.i.p.ation. "How is it going? Is everything okay?"

"It's all going to be fine, Dad," she said, unable to stifle a sigh.

"Is it? We need her in that office. We can't let the liberals and progressives take it back."

"It's Oklahoma, Dad. It's the reddest state in the country, and her reelection is going to be a cakewalk. And in case you were wondering, she's also a human being who has emotions. This is about a little more than poll numbers."

"Of course it is," he quickly responded. "But, the fact of the matter remains that there's a lot at stake here. Are you working hard to make sure that it's handled correctly?"

"That's not exactly my job alone, but we're all working very hard."

"Good. I'm glad to hear that. A couple of the guys likely to be running against each other in the Democrat primary have publicly stated their support for both abortion and gay marriage. We can't have that kind of influence leading our capital city."

Every word was like a blow to her gut, but she hung on. She fought the urge to tell her dad that it didn't even matter. The mayor's office was a city post; it would have no real bearing on those issues anyway. They were largely peripheral for anything but a state or federal seat. She didn't want to debate.

"Thanks for checking in, Dad. Have a good night."

"Keep me posted," he squeezed in before she hung up.

She knew deep down that he meant well, but every conversation with him seemed to reinforce the fact that she was never going to be able to please her parents. Her heart pounded, each beat angrier than the last, as she tried to focus on the issue at hand. The mayor was the most important thing to worry about right now.

As she thought of Madeline, her smile returned. Jo hoped that she had slept well and that she would ultimately choose to stay, even if for only one more night. She didn't care if Madeline slept on the couch or if they only made small talk while Jo cooked her dinner. She just wanted her nearby. Wanted to hear the sweet sound of Madeline's laugh again, wanted to relive the closeness of last night.

It was selfish, she knew, considering all that Madeline had been through in the past twenty-four hours, but still, she had enjoyed being there for someone else-enjoyed being someone's rock.

That kind of intimacy was something she had all but forgotten. These days, she was lucky to have a conversation outside of work with a convenience store clerk or a one-night stand. The notion of having friends had pretty much died when she took this job. For one thing, the hours did not really allow for maintaining friendships. For another, it was hard to be close to someone and not divulge the deep secrets she was keeping.

Regardless, she was determined to find a way to win Madeline's friendship and keep her secrets in the process. There was no sense in letting a golden opportunity like this slip through her grasp simply because she was too weak-willed to hold on to it. There was also no point in jeopardizing her job.

She pulled into the Starbucks drive-through a few blocks from her apartment and ordered two coffees. After Madeline's drinking binge last night, coffee would likely be appreciated. Minutes later, she was getting out of her car and walking to her front door. She unlocked it and swung it open-a difficult task while carrying two cups of coffee-and her smile instantly faded.

Madeline was sprawled out on her couch...and well into Season One of The L Word.

Jo's jaw dropped open, while Madeline fumbled for the remote-acting very much like a clumsy teen who had been caught watching p.o.r.n.

To make matters worse, at the moment an intense s.e.x scene was filling the screen, complete with moans of pleasure. Jo's surprise was compounded when Madeline turned her gaze back to the screen, seemingly unable to tear her eyes away from the sight of the two women who were enjoying each other's bodies. She shivered and finally found the off b.u.t.ton when the two women on screen began to get dressed.

The silence in the room was almost palpable. Jo wished she could think of something to say. Instead, she walked awkwardly into the kitchen, set down the coffees, removed the messenger bag holding her laptop and briefcase and busied herself refilling Jaws's food dish and water bowl.

It was Madeline who finally broke the silence, calling to her from the next room. "I'm sorry."

Despite the tension, Jo laughed. "You don't have to apologize to me." She moved back into the room, though she took care not to meet Madeline's gaze directly. She watched as Madeline followed suit, diverting her eyes and shifting uncomfortably in her seat. Jo stood awkwardly in the corner, hoping Madeline couldn't hear her heart beating uncontrollably.

"That show is...um...very interesting, actually," Madeline admitted, her cheeks flushing.

"It's not bad."

"Have you watched it all the way through? I mean, through Season Six?"

Jo nodded. She had watched it time and again when it first came out on DVD. It had made her feel as though she wasn't the only lesbian in the world. She knew she wasn't, of course, but in her family, her circle of friends, her world-she was.

"I may have to rent it and watch it through sometime. It was entertaining me." Madeline paused and appeared to be thinking through what that meant.

"Guess those gays aren't so bad after all, right?" Jo laughed.

"I don't have a problem with gay people," Madeline said quietly. "But you can't exactly embrace everyone when you run for office."

"I understand. It's how our donors think, how this area of the world works," Jo conceded. "I doubt that you would have received many votes if you supported the gays, even though you were running strictly on the issues of government accountability and limited spending."

"You sound like a campaign commercial." Madeline attempted a laugh, but the sound fell awkwardly in the s.p.a.ce between them. "But what about you, Jo? How supportive are you of the gay lifestyle?"

"I have many friends..." Jo trailed off as Madeline's brow arched in curiosity. Jo could tell where this was headed.

"So are you...?"

"Do you need clothes or anything else from your house?" Jo interrupted. It was better to avoid anything that personal for right now.

Jo could see that Madeline wanted to pursue the subject. She had to find a way to cut her off at the pa.s.s.

"I can go get them for you if you'd like," she continued, determinedly steering the conversation down a different path.

"I'll go with you." Madeline finally gave into the subject change. "And then you can drop me off at a hotel. That way, I can be out of your hair and your life can return to normal."

"You are more than welcome to stay here."

"Oh no." Madeline waved her hand in the air, dismissing the thought. Jo's heart fell a little as she continued, "I'll give you your s.p.a.ce back."

Chapter Eight.

Madeline hadn't expected Jo to come home so early. She needed to have a talk with Jaws.

"A warning bark wouldn't have killed you, you know?" she imagined telling him.

At least Jo hadn't walked in an hour earlier when the heat on the television screen had become too much for Madeline to take. She had given into temptation and pleasured herself on Jo's couch as she watched two women make love, long-forgotten l.u.s.t reawakened by the images.

It had been electrifying, and she hadn't been lying when she told Jo she'd check out the show sometime. In fact, it was nearly all she could think about as they drove to her house to pick up her clothes.

At the same time, she couldn't help but wonder about Jo. Why did she own all the DVDs of a lesbian television series if she didn't enjoy watching two women together? Was this why the DOMA speech had been a little soft at first?