Communicating for a Change Part 4

"I'm saying that until you can deliver it with no notes, from memory, then it's not your message. You may know where you want to go, but you haven't internalized the way to get there."

"Will, I've tried to memorize my messages before, and I just can't. I get confused on how to say something, and then I get fl.u.s.tered and completely lost." Ray's voice reflected frustrated experience.

"Do you have kids, Ray?" Will asked.

"What? Uh, yeah, I have two."

"Do you like to travel? Go on family vacations?" Will was making a point, but Ray wasn't sure yet what it wasa"or what it had to do with what they had just been talking about.

"When we get the chance," Ray said cautiously. "What are you getting at?"

Will ignored the question. "Tell me about your favorite trip and why it's your favorite."

Ray shrugged and launched into his story. "I guess my favorite trip was one we took a couple of years ago. My wife, Sally, and I took our kids back to where I grew up. My folks don't live there anymore, so we really had no good reason to go back. It had been a while since I'd taken some time off, so we had plenty of vacation saved up. We were able to take three weeks and stay on the back roads, and I really got to show my kids where I spent time when I was their age."

Over the next few minutes, Ray unfolded the story of his journey. He had Will alternating between laughter, as he told of his first girlfriend and poorly aimed first kiss, and tears as he spoke of the trip to his grandfather's gravesite and the impact the old man had on Ray's life. As Ray finished his tale he concluded by saying, "I guess the best part of the trip was what I saw in my kids' eyes. They finally saw that I was once a kid with all the same hopes and fears they have. In a lot of ways, it opened doors for me to their hearts."

"That's a great message, Ray. Can I get a copy of your notes?"

"Notes? You know there aren't any notes."

"Amazing. And yet you seemed to have no problem remembering. You not only got all the facts right, but you organized them well and made me laugh and cry. I even learned an insight about being a dad."

"But that's different, Will. I wasn't preaching. I was just telling a story."

"And in that one statement you've unlocked the secret of Internalize the Message," Will responded. "Until you can stand up and tell a story, you're not ready to preach. You see, people connect with a story, and a story takes people on a journey. Whether it's a journey to your childhood home or a journey to a life-changing truth, it's a story that will take you there. And did you notice how effortlessly you told it? You didn't stumble over words. You didn't forget major elements, but you obviously left out unimportant details."

"Like what?"

"Well, I heard all about a great road trip and yet have no idea what kind of vehicle you drive. It was important on your trip, but not to the story."

"I get it," Ray said. "And it was a minivan." Ray wasn't sure, but he thought he saw a flash of disdain on Will's face at the mention of a minivan. But he was a trucker, after all.

"You see, Ray, speaking from memory isn't difficult to do if you're telling a story. People make it difficult when they try to communicate points instead of telling a story. If you have four or five points you're trying to drive home, then you get focused on not forgetting any of them."

"So that's why it's important to have a one point message. That way you only have one thing to remember," Ray said.

"Pete said you were a quick learner! Obviously there are more things to remember than the main point, but far fewer than most preachers think. When I leave for a long trip I not only know where I want to end up, but I know the major roads I need to take. I've committed the route to memory, and so when I get to the road, I take it. My job depended on me knowing that route. Most preachers I've watched don't act like anything is dependent on them knowing where they're going."

"I hate to show you that I'm not as quick as you think I am, Will. But what is dependent on it?"

"How can you expect your listener to care enough to remember what you're saying when you can't?" Will let the words sink in.

"I never thought of it that way," Ray said.

Will continued. "When you stand up and speak without notes and without having to read your sermon, you're saying, *This is so important that it's a part of mea"and I think you should make it a part of you, too.'"

"Will," Ray began, "when I think about the messages I usually preach, I can't imagine doing it without any notes! It's hard enough sometimes with the outline sitting right in front of me."

Will smiled. "That's because you've always used an outline. Now you have a good map."

7.

CRUCIAL CONNECTIONS.

"Well, Ray, I'm guessing that the lunch you had with Pete this afternoon is pretty much history. You could probably use a little dinner."

Food. The day had been such a whirlwind that it hadn't dawned on Ray that it had been several hoursa"and many milesa"since he last ate. "Now that you mention it, I could stand a bite or two. Are we going to one of those greasy spoon diners that truckers always eat in?"

Will smiled. "You watch too much television, Ray. One of the benefits of retiring from the road is that you have time to eat in better places. But don't knock a truck stop until you've tried it. I'd take good diner coffee anytime over one of those fancy latte places. Anyhow, I know a great steak house up the road. There's a guy there I want you to meet. As for where we're headed a well, we'll make a couple of stops here and there, but the cab of this truck is pretty much our destination. Pete thought you would benefit from our spending some time together and, for some crazy reason, I just seem to think better behind the wheel of a truck." And just maybe, some things would be easier said looking straight ahead than face-to-face.

The steak house was a welcome sight for both men as Will wheeled into the parking lot. The place was crowded, which Ray took as a good sign of things to come. The two men were shown to their seats and both ordered the New York strip.

"Well, if that's my salad on its way over here, then I'm ready for the fourth imperative," Ray said.

After the waitress delivered the salads, Will offered a short blessing for the food. Looking up, he gestured with his fork and said, "Engage the Audience."

"Beg your pardon?"

"That's it. That's the fifth one. Every truck driver worth his salt knows to secure his load."

"You mean, tie things down?" Ray asked.

"Not just tie them down. It's more than that." Will spoke between mouthfuls of salad and bread. "When I back a tractor up to 9,000 gallons of gasoline, I want to know that it's going to stay with me. Know what I mean?"

Ray nodded.

"First of all," Will continued, "it's my joba"my responsibilitya"to get the load to its destination. And second, it could get dangerous if things broke loose. Now bring that over to our discussion. As a communicator, I have to be just as certain that I've secured my cargo."

"And securing your cargo is the same as really knowing your main point, right?" Ray was pleased with himself for tracking so well.

"Nice try, Ray. The main point is your destination. But in this case, your cargo is your audience. That's why you have to engage the audience. As a communicator, you can know exactly where you're going, but if you head off in a cloud of dust and leave your audience behind, it won't matter if you get there or not. You have to engage your listeners and make certain that they're with you. This is the first WE section on the message map. As a trucker, I had to make sure that the trailer was engaged. Once it was locked down I was good to go. When I'm preaching, I have to engage with my audience on an emotional level and then I know they're on board with me."

"An emotional level?" Ray asked. "You're not a crier, are you Will?"

"Do I look like a crier?" Will asked mildly, attacking his dinner roll with a b.u.t.ter knife.

No, Will certainly did not look like a crier.

"Okay, then. What do you mean *on an emotional level'?"

"You have to connect with your audience around a real need in their lives. Something they feel. You have to raise in them an awareness of a past, present, or future need in their lives that makes them want to listen to you and follow you to the answer. It's not enough to say, *I have the truth of G.o.d's Word up here and it's your job to listen.' That might have worked years ago, but not today. No way. Today you have to show people how the truth impacts their lives."

"But isn't my job to preach the Word of G.o.d and allow Him to use it as He sees fit?" Ray asked. "What if my text for the day doesn't address a felt need as much as it addresses something we need to doa"like pray, for instance. I don't think many of my listeners have a felt need to pray."

"But they do have a felt need for guidance, for peace, to know G.o.d's will in troubled times," Will answered. "Can you meet those needs without prayer?"

"No," Ray said quietly. "No, you really can't. No one can."

As these thoughts sunk in, the waitress delivered the rest of the meal. Two steaks with baked potatoes and the works. The two hungry men dove into the food as if it had been days, not hours, since their last meal. After getting a start on the food, Will finally spoke.

"Ray, I'm not saying we ought to water down the message. Not at all! I'm saying that we take the life-changing truth and make very sure we apply it to lives that are ready to be changed. It's just that we may have to remind them that they want to change."

"How?" Ray asked. How do we make them feel it?"

"Tension," Will responded. "We create tension."

"Look, I know I'm not the expert here. But I've been around ministry long enough to know that our job is to relieve tension, not create it."

Will laughed. "You may be right. But it's not so much that I create tension; it's that I remind them of the tension they already feel. The tension of trying to be the kind of husbands or wives or parents they're supposed to be. I challenge them to look at the weaknesses in their lives and ask the question, *Then what do I do about it?' If I can get them there, then I'm halfway home. Once I get them wanting to know the answer, then I know I have 'em until the end of the message. I've secured my cargo and I don't have to worry about losing it."

"No, but you'd better deliver when you get them to the end," Ray said.

"You're so right. That's why we're talking about engaging your audience. Another way you can hold an audience is to get them to look at things in a way they've never looked at them before. There's someone I want you to meet."

With that Will left the table, returning shortly with another man. "Ray, this is Larry Wayne. He owns this fine establishment." Larry Wayne was about Will's age, but his waistline made it obvious that he had enjoyed the work of his chef.

"Nice to meet you, Ray," Larry said. "Any friend of Will's is a friend of mine."

"Larry built this place a few years back, but for thirty years he worked the lounges in Vegas, Reno, and Atlantic City." Ray's eyes lit up as he heard this. "Anytime I was driving through a town he was playing, I'd make sure I stopped to see him."

"Are you a singer?" Ray asked.

"What?" Larry joked. "I don't look like a dancer? Just kidding, Ray. I do stand-up."

"Larry was one of the best stand-up comedians on the circuit. I wanted you to meet him, because if anyone can connect with an audience, it's Larry."

"So are you a performer, Ray?" Larry asked.

"Me? Oh no, I'm not a performer. I'm in the ministry," Ray said almost apologetically. It was a topic Ray always dreaded. Anytime he told someone what he did, he always felt like they pigeonholed him as "a religious person."

"Hey, that's great," Larry said. "Will led me to Christ twenty years ago. That's why his money is never good in my place."

"And why I always order the best steak in the joint," Will replied with a smile.

"But listen, Ray," Larry said, "don't kid yourself about not being a performer. If you're a preacher, then you're a performer just like me. The sooner you accept it, the better off you'll be."

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, we both make our living trying to convince a group of people that they're glad they came out to hear us," Larry said.

"I guess I never thought of it that way."

"You really need to learn to think like a comedian, Ray," Will said.

"You want me to tell jokes?" Ray asked.

"Only if you're funny!" Larry laughed. "But seriously, it's not that you need to tell jokes. Some people are really good at that, and other people are like Will here."

"Hey, I didn't come here to be insulted."

"No, you just came to eat my steak. Ray, you need to become an observer of people and situations. Whenever I stand up in front of a crowd, I'm constantly looking for ways to connect with them. It could be the weather that day or something in the news, or even a funny hat that some lady is wearing. Anything that can help me make that first connection. When it's your regular crowd, you're already connected so you can move right to the issue."

"Anything to make ME into WE," Ray said, looking at Will.

"Exactly. Your goal is to connect. Another thing that I learned from watching comedians like Larry was the benefit of being a skeptic."

"A skeptic?"

Larry sat down and began to talk with Ray. "You see, a skeptic questions the status quo. They look at things differently from everyone else. As a comedian, my job is to look at things and to get my audience to look at things in ways they never have before. I get them to see the humor in the mundane things of life. Your job is to look at the truth of Scripture from every point of view: the believer and the unbeliever, men and women, young and old. Once you've done that, you can ask and answer the questions that your audience is asking. Then you've connected. You see, Ray, we're all in the connecting business. We engage for different purposes, but ultimately our success comes down to whether or not the people are with us. For me there were only a few laughs at stake, but for you the stakes are much higher."

Ray sat and listened as Will and Larry reminisced about the old days in Vegas and Atlantic City. Secretly, Ray wished he had a tape recorder because some of these stories were great ill.u.s.trations. As the evening drew to a close Larry was good to his word, allowing no check to be delivered to the table. Will and Ray left the restaurant, climbed back into the cab of the truck and headed out onto the highway.

As the two drove in silence, the big meal began to have an effect. It was getting late and Ray was in serious need of sleep. "So, are we driving all night or does this thing have a pop-up camper in it somewhere?"

"Are you ready for some shut-eye, Ray?"

"I could use a little if there's a good hotel around here."

With that Will jerked the wheel of the truck so violently that it threw Ray against the pa.s.senger door. His head hit the window with a thud and the tires squealed as the truck swerved onto an exit ramp. Stunned by the abrupt actions of the normally careful driver, Ray practically shouted, "Will, what in heaven's name are you doing?"

Will just looked ahead and said, "One last point for imperative number five, my boy."

"Number five?" Ray said. "After that b.u.mp on my head I'll be lucky if I can remember my name, much less five imperatives."

"Aw c'mon. You're being a little dramatic, aren't you? Besides I'm old enough to be your father, and I didn't hit my head."

Ray couldn't believe Will's att.i.tude. What had happened to the kind old truck driver from Atlanta? In all honesty, Ray had to admit that Will's sudden actions had startled more than injured him. The truck exited the highway and pulled into the parking lot of a hotel.

"Does this place look alright to you?"

"The hotel is fine but the knot on my head needs an explanation."

"An explanation? Well, since I was driving I a.s.sumed it was up to me to get us to a hotel. Besides, like I said, I'm older than you and I didn't hit my head."

"That's because you knew where we were going! You were ready for the turn and I wasn't."

"Funny how that works, isn't it?"

"Okay, I'm supposed to get some kind of point here, right? Look, Will, I know you're getting at something that has to do with communication and driving and a journey and probably stand-up comedy, too, but I haven't slept in a "

"Okay, fair enough. You made a great statement a minute ago, Ray."