Comedy Of Marriage And Other Tales Part 28

You are like my father. It seems to me that when anyone begins to like billiards at all, they become infatuated with the game; and you two people are two of a kind.

MARTINEL

My son, when a man grows old, and has no family, he has to take refuge in such pleasures as these. If you take bait-fishing as your diversion in the morning and billiards for the afternoon and evening, you have two kinds of amus.e.m.e.nt that are both worthy and attractive.

LeON

Oh, ho! Bait-fishing, indeed! That means to say, getting up early and sitting with your feet in the water through wind and rain in the hope of catching, perhaps each quarter of an hour, a fish about the size of a match. And you call that an attractive pastime?

MARTINEL

I do, without a doubt. But do you believe that there is a single lover in the world capable of doing as much for his mistress throughout ten, twelve, or fifteen years of life? If you asked my opinion, I think he would give it up at the end of a fortnight.

MME. DE RONCHARD

Of a truth; he would.

LeON [_interrupts_]

Pardon me, I should give it up at the end of a week.

MARTINEL

You speak sensibly.

PEt.i.tPRe

Come along, my dear fellow.

MARTINEL

Shall we play fifty up?

PEt.i.tPRe

Fifty up will do.

MARTINEL [_turns to_ Mme. de Ronchard]

We shall see you again shortly, Madame.

MME. DE RONCHARD

Well, I have had enough of Havre for the present.

[_Exit_ Martinel _and_ Pet.i.tpre C.]

SCENE III.

(Leon _and_ Mme. de Ronchard.)

LeON

Martinel is a good fellow. Not a man of culture, but bright as sunshine and straight as a rule.

MME. DE RONCHARD [_seated_ L.]

He is lacking in distinction of manner.

LeON [_inadvertently_]

How about yourself, Aunt?

MME. DE RONCHARD

What do you mean?

LeON [_corrects himself and approaches_ Mme. de Ronchard]

I said, how about yourself? You know what I mean--you have such an intimate knowledge of the world that you are a better judge of human nature than anyone I know.

MME. DE RONCHARD

Indeed, I am. You were too small a boy to recollect it, but nevertheless, I went a great deal into society before my husband spent all my money, and let me tell you that I was a great success. For instance, at a grand ball given by the Turkish amba.s.sador, at which I was dressed as Salammbo--

LeON [_interrupts_]

What, you, the Carthaginian princess?

MME. DE RONCHARD

Certainly. Why not? Let me tell you that I was greatly admired, for my appearance was exquisite. My dear, that was in eighteen hundred and sixty--

LeON [_sits near_ Mme. de Ronchard]

Oh, no dates! for goodness sake, no dates!

MME. DE RONCHARD

It is not necessary to be sarcastic.

LeON

What! I, sarcastic? G.o.d forbid! It is simply this: in view of the fact that you did not wish this marriage to take place, and that I did, and that the marriage has taken place, I feel very happy. Do you understand me? It is a triumph for me, and I must confess that I feel very triumphant this evening. Tomorrow, however, vanish the triumpher, and there will remain only your affectionate little nephew. Come, smile, Auntie. At heart you are not as ill-natured as you pretend to be, and that is proved by the generosity of soul you have evinced in founding at Neuilly, despite your modest means, a hospital for--lost dogs!

MME. DE RONCHARD