Comedy Of Marriage And Other Tales Part 26

LeON [_aside, turns to the table_]

There she goes again--another little slap at me! That is never wanting.

[_offers a cup to_ Martinel.] You will take a small cup, won't you, M.

Martinel, and a nip of old brandy with it? I know your tastes. We will take good care of you.

MARTINEL

Thank you, Leon.

LeON [_to_ Pet.i.tpre]

Will you have a cup, father?

PEt.i.tPRe

I will, my son.

LeON [_to the newly married couple, seated L. and talking aside_]

And you, you bridal pair there? [_The couple, absorbed in each other, do not answer._] Oh, I suppose we must not bother you. [_He sets cup down on the table_].

PEt.i.tPRe [_to_ Martinel]

You don't smoke, I believe?

MARTINEL

Never, thank you.

MME. DE RONCHARD

You astonish me! My brother and Leon would not miss smoking each day for anything in the world. But what an abomination a cigar is!

PEt.i.tPRe

A delicious abomination, Clarisse.

LeON [_turns to_ Mme. de Ronchard]

Almost all abominations are delicious, Auntie; in fact many of them, to my personal knowledge, are exquisite.

MME. DE RONCHARD

You naughty fellow!

PEt.i.tPRe [_takes_ Leon's _arm_]

Come and smoke in the billiard-room, since your aunt objects to it here.

LeON [_to_ Pet.i.tpre]

The day when she will love anything except her spaniels--

PEt.i.tPRe

Hold your tongue and come along. [_Exit_ C.]

MARTINEL [_to_ Mme. de Ronchard]

This is the sort of marriage that I like--a marriage that, in this Paris of yours, you don't have very often. After the wedding breakfast, which takes place directly after you come from the church, all the guests go home, even the maids of honor and the ushers. The married couple remain at home and dine with their parents or relatives. In the evening they play billiards or cards, just as on an ordinary night; the newly married couple entertain each other. [Gilberte _and_ Jean _rise, and hand in hand slowly retire_ C.] Then, before midnight, good night!

MME. DE RONCHARD [_aside_]

Which is altogether very _bourgeois_!

MARTINEL [_sits_ R. _upon the sofa beside_ Mme. de Ronchard]

As to newly married couples--instead of going on that absurd and traditional thing you call a honeymoon, it is far better for them to go at once to the apartment or house prepared for them. I dare say you will think my plan lacking in fashion and display, but I cannot help that.

For myself, I must say that I like absence of all ostentation.

MME. DE RONCHARD

Your plan is not according to the customs of polite society, Monsieur.

MARTINEL

Polite society, indeed! Why, there are thirty-six different kinds of polite society. For instance, take Havre.

MME. DE RONCHARD [_interrupts_]

I know only ours. [_Corrects herself._] That is, I mean to say, mine, which is the correct one.

MARTINEL

Oh, naturally, naturally! Nevertheless, simple as it may be, this marriage is an acknowledged fact, and I hope that you have taken into your good books my dear nephew, who, until now--

MME. DE RONCHARD

I can hardly help doing so since he is my brother's son-in-law, and my niece's husband.

MARTINEL

Well, that is not the only thing, is it? I am very happy that the affair is over--although my life has been spent in the midst of difficulties.

MME. DE RONCHARD

What! Your life?

MARTINEL