Christmas Every Day Part 51

"You remember," he coaxed. "To stop by the restaurant for some tetrazzini. We're all out." Yesterday he had finished the last of the leftovers from the food that Nik had brought him.

Sara nodded, vividly remembering everything about that evening. She smiled at her father. "You're free to do anything you want, Sergeant Santangelo."

Raymond looked at Sara wistfully. "I thought that maybe we could go as a family."

She felt a touch of guilt for what she was planning. "You and me?"

His response was immediate and eager. "Yeah." And Nik. When Sara didn't answer, he sighed. "I guess that's not much of a family."

She wondered if her father was feeling genuine remorse, or if perhaps, just perhaps, he was attempting to manipulate her.

In any event, she answered honestly. " " I told you once , Dad, just the two of us would have been more than enough for me. " She smiled as she looked at him. She was glad she had come. Glad she had made her peace with him. " " It still is."

"Then it's a date?"

Sara shook her head. Her mind was made up and she couldn't allow herself to change it. Or to postpone what what she had to do. It was going to be hard enough as it was. "No."

"But-"

Sara took a deep breath, fortifying herself for what she was going to say. "I said I'd only stay until you were well."

"Um, you know-" he rubbed his chest in small, concentric circles " "

there is this tightness in my chest that I didn't want to mention. "

Sara grinned. "Uh-huh. You're a great cop, but a lousy actor, Dad .".

Raymond laid his hand on her arm. Even his touch implored her. "Stay, Sara." When she turned to look at him , he said, "This isn't acting."

She knew that. And there was an ache in her heart because she had to refuse him. "I can't."

They had made their peace. It wasn't him she was leaving' Is it Nik?

Eyes back on the road, Sara nodded solemnly. "Yes."

He didn't understand. Everything he'd witnessed had told him that they cared about one another. He knew Nik cared about Sara. It was evident in the way he looked at her. " " I would think he'd be a reason to stay. " " " Maybe, " she agreed, trying not to think about Nik at all, "if I were like everyone else."

Sara turned into her father's driveway. She shut off the engine, but neither of them made a move to leave the car.

Touching her cheek, Raymond turned her face until she looked at him.

"I've always thought of you as special, Sara," he said gently. "But not stupid."

"And you think leaving Nik is stupid." She wasn't asking It was a foregone conclusion. She could tell by her father's expression.

"h.e.l.l, yes." He couldn't say it emphatically enough. "Men like Nik don't grow on trees."

A smile quirked Sara's mouth as she remembered another conversation, pressed in the pages of time. A conversation that had gone on to form the rest of her life. " " That's what Mom once said about you. "

Raymond suddenly understood. "Sara, don't let my mistakes mess up your life."

Too late, she thought. All she could do was smile in response

Raymond took both of his daughter's hands in his. He suddenly felt very helpless. "Everyone's different, Sara. Nik isn't me. Nik doesn't have private demons he's a slave to."

It wasn't a demon she was worried about. She could handle flaws, expected flaws. It was the inevitable that terrified her. Seeing Nik walk away from her someday would be more than she could bear.

But her father's declaration had her curious. "How do you know? "

Raymond shrugged. "I had him checked out."

Sara looked at him, stunned. "You what?"

It had seemed like a perfectly natural thing for him to do. "Hey, I'm still on the force, with a lot of connections. Kane gave Nik a glowing report, which is saying a lot for Madigan"

He couldn't read her expression, but he couldn't back out now, even if he wanted to. "Maybe I wanted to catch up on playing " Dad. " I finally got a chance to b.u.t.t back in to your life, Sara. Don't have me b.u.t.ting out again."

Uncomfortable, Sara opened the car door and got out. "it's a lot more complicated than you think."

Getting out on his side, Raymond looked at his daughter over the roof of the car. "I can't tell you what to do, Sara."

There was no hostility in her voice, only resignation as to what she had to do. "No, you can't." She walked toward the front door.

Raymond followed her. "But there comes a time when people should stop weighing everything and just take a chance. Something like this might not come again."

She could only make the connection to what her father had espoused before. "You mean luck? Gambling?"

"No, I mean love and yes, gambling. In a way." Falling in love with someone was a gamble. He knew that. "One thing I've learned, Sara, and I learned it a little too late " he placed his arm around her shoulder "-love's the only game in town that's worthwhile."

For a second she enjoyed the feeling, the closeness that existed between her and her father at this moment. But her mind was already made up. Still, she didn't have the heart to tell him yet. Tonight.

She would tell him tonight. When she packed.

"I'll think about it."

"Good." He took out his key. "Think really hard." He unlocked the door and crossed the threshold. "Parents don't want to see their kids make the same mistakes that they did."

"Don't worry," she said quietly, "I won't."

The third time he looked up, Nik realized that he was watching the clock on the wall like a nervous apprentice chef babying his first souffle. Sara had said that she was taking her father to the doctor first thing in the morning. It was now after eleven. How long did "first thing" take?

Had something gone wrong? The phone hadn't rung. Was he hoping for too much, thinking that she'd call if she needed someone to lean on?

Muttering to himself, he picked up a ladle and stirred the bouillabaisse he had simmering on the stove. When he glanced up in the direction of the clock again, he saw Sara walking by the entrance.

Surprised that she didn't stop in the kitchen to talk to him , his fingers went lax. The ladle slipped into the huge pot. " " d.a.m.n ! "

Nik made a grab for the spoon. The handle was hot. He yanked his hand back. He'd singed it like a novice. It did nothing for his temper.

Antonio looked over Nik's shoulder, amused. "New ingredient ? "