Business Correspondence Part 7

"This metal has been subjected to severe accelerated corrosion tests held in accordance with rigid specifications laid down by the American Society for Testing Material, and has proven to corrode much less than either charcoal iron, wrought iron, or steel sheet.

"A complete record of these tests and results will be found on the enclosed sheet."

Then there are times when description may be almost entirely eliminated from the letter. For instance, if you are trying to sell a man a house and lot and he has been out to look at the place and has gone over it thoroughly, there is little more that you can say in the way of description. Your letter must deal entirely with arguments as to why he should buy now--persuasion, inducement. Or, if you are trying to sell him the typewriter that he has been trying out in his office for a month, description is unnecessary--the load your letter must carry is lightened. And there are letters in which explanation is unnecessary. If you are trying to get a man to order a suit of clothes by mail, you will not explain the use of clothes but you will bear down heavily on the description of the material that you put into these particular garments and point out why it is to his advantage to order direct of the manufacturers.

But if you are presenting a new proposition, it is necessary to explain its nature, its workings, its principles and appliances. If you are trying to sell a fountain pen you will not waste valuable s.p.a.ce in explaining to the reader what a fountain pen is good for and why he should have one, but rather you will give the reasons for buying your particular pen in preference to others. You will explain the self-filling feature and the new patent which prevents its leaking or clogging.

It is not always possible to separate description and explanation.

Here is an ill.u.s.tration taken from a letter sent out by a mail-order shoe company:

"I hope your delay in ordering is not the result of any lack of clear information about Wearwells. Let me briefly mention some of the features of Wearwell shoes that I believe warrant you in favoring us with your order:

(A) Genuine custom style; (B) Highest grade material and workmanship; (C) The best fit--thanks to our quarter-sized system--that it is possible to obtain in shoes; (D) Thorough foot comfort and long wear; (E) Our perfect mail-order service; and (F) The guaranteed PROOF OF QUALITY given in the specification tag sent with every pair."

This is a concise summary of a longer description that had been given in a previous letter and it explains why the shoes will give satisfaction.

Here is the paragraph by which the manufacturer of a time-recording device, writing about the advantages of his system puts in explanation plus argument:

"Every employee keeps his own time and cannot question his own record. All mechanism is hidden and locked. Nothing can be tampered with. The clock cannot be stopped. The record cannot be beaten.

"This device fits into any cost system and gives an accurate record of what time every man puts on every job. It serves the double purpose of furnishing you a correct time-on-job cost and prevents loafing. It stops costly leaks and enables you to figure profit to the last penny."

Explanation may run in one of many channels. It may point out how the careful selection of raw material makes your product the best, or how the unusual facilities of your factory or the skill of your workmen, or the system of testing the parts a.s.sures the greatest value. You might explain why the particular improvements and the patents on your machines make it better or give it greater capacity.

The description and the explanation must of necessity depend upon the character of the proposition, but it may be laid down as a general principle that the prospect must be made to understand thoroughly just what the article is for, how it is made, how it looks, how it is used, and what its points of superiority are.

Whenever possible, the description and explanation in the letter should be reinforced by samples or ill.u.s.trations that will give a more graphic idea of the product.

The prospect may be sufficiently familiar with the thing you are selling to relieve you of the necessity of describing and explaining, although usually these supports are necessary for a selling campaign. But it must be remembered that description and explanation alone do not make a strong appeal to the will. They may arouse interest and excite desire but they do not carry conviction as argument does. Some letters are full of explanation and description but lack argument. The repair man from the factory may give a good explanation of how a machine works, but the chances are he would fall down in trying to sell the machine, unless he understood how to reinforce his explanations with a salesman's ability to use argument and persuasion.

And so you must look well to your arguments, and the arguments that actually pull the most orders consist of proofs--cold, hard logic and facts that cannot be questioned. As you hope for the verdict of the jury you must prove your case. It is amazing how many correspondents fail to appreciate the necessity for arguments. Pages will be filled with a.s.sertions, superlative adjectives, boastful claims of superiority, but not one sentence that offers proof of any statement, not one logical reason why the reader should be interested.

"We know you will make a mint of money if you put in our goods."

"This is the largest and most complete line in the country." "Our factory has doubled its capacity during the last three years." "Our terms are the most liberal that have ever been offered." "You are missing the opportunity of your lifetime if you do not accept this proposition." "We hope to receive your order by return mail, for you will never have such a wonderful opportunity again." Such sentences fill the pages of thousands of letters that are mailed every day.

"Our system of inspection with special micrometer gauges insures all parts being perfect--within one-thousandth of an inch of absolute accuracy. This means, too, any time you want an extra part of your engine for replacement that you can get it and that it will fit. If we charged you twice as much for the White engine, we could not give you better material or workmanship."

Now this is an argument that is worth while: that the parts of the engine are so accurately ground that repairs can be made quickly, and new parts will fit without a moment's trouble. The last sentence of the paragraph is of course nothing but a.s.sertion, but it is stated in a way that carries conviction. Many correspondents would have bluntly declared that this was the best engine ever manufactured, or something of that kind, and made no impression at all on the minds of the readers. But the statement that the company could not make a better engine, even if it charged twice as much, sinks in.

Proof of quality is always one of the strongest arguments that can be used. A man wants to feel sure that he is given good value for his money, it matters not whether he is buying a lead pencil or an automobile. And next to argument of quality is the argument of price. Here are some striking paragraphs taken from the letter sent out by a firm manufacturing gummed labels and advertising stickers:

"We would rather talk quality than price because no other concern prints better stickers than ours--but we can't help talking price because no other concern charges as little for them as we do."

This is a strong statement but it is nothing more than a statement The writer, however, hastens to come forward with argument and proof:

"You know we make a specialty of gummed labels--do nothing else. We have special machinery designed by ourselves--machinery that may be used by no other concern. This enables us to produce better stickers at a minimum expense.

"All of our stickers are printed on the best stock, and double gummed, and, by the way, compare the gumming of our stickers with those put up by other concerns. We have built up a business and reputation on _stickers that stick and stay_."

If you were in the market for labels you would not hesitate to send an order to that firm, for the writer gives you satisfying reasons for the quality and the low price of his goods. The argument in favor of its goods is presented clearly, concisely, convincingly.

The argument that will strike home to the merchant is one that points out his opportunity for gain. Here is the way a wholesale grocer presented his proposition on a new brand of coffee:

"You put in this brand of coffee and we stand back of you and push sales. Our guarantee of quality goes with every pound we put out.

Ask the opinion of all your customers. If there is the least dissatisfaction, refund them the price of their coffee and deduct it from our next bill. So confident are we of the satisfaction that this coffee will give that we agree to take back at the end of six months all the remaining stock you have on hand--that is, if you do not care to handle the brand longer.

"You have probably never sold guaranteed coffee before. You take no chances. The profit is as large as on other brands, and your customers will be impressed with the guarantee placed on every pound."

The guarantee and the offer of the free trial are possibly the two strongest arguments that can be used either with a dealer or in straight mail-order selling.

Among the arguments that are most effective are testimonials and references to satisfied users. If the writer can refer to some well-known firm or individual as a satisfied customer he strengthens his point.

"When we showed this fixture to John Wanamaker's man, it took just about three minutes to close the deal for six of them. Since then they have ordered seventy-four more."

Such references as this naturally inspire confidence in a proposition and extracts from letters may be used with great effect, provided the name and address of the writer is given, so that it will have every appearance of being genuine.

A solicitor of patents at Washington works into his letters to prospective clients quotations from manufacturers:

"'We wish to be put in communication with the inventor of some useful novelty, instrument or device, who is looking for a way to market his invention. We want to increase our business along new lines and manufacture under contract, paying royalties to the patentee.

"'If your clients have any articles of merit that they want to market, kindly communicate with us. Our business is the manufacture of patented articles under contract and we can undoubtedly serve many of your clients in a profitable manner.'"

Such extracts as these are intended to impress upon the inventor the desirability of placing his business with someone who has such a wide acquaintance and is in a position to put him in touch with manufacturers.

To send a list of references may also prove a most convincing argument, especially if the writer can refer to some man or firm located near the one to whom he is writing. A mutual acquaintance forms a sort of connecting link that is a pulling force even though the reference is never looked up. In fact, it is only on occasions that references of this kind are investigated, for the mere naming of banks and prominent business men is sufficient to inspire confidence that the proposition is "on the square."