Book of Etiquette Volume Ii Part 7

Perhaps more important than the tea itself, is the appearance of the tea-table. The well-equipped table is adorned with fine china and gleaming silver, and there are always a few flowers to add to the beauty of the setting. Ferns may be used instead of flowers, but there must be no elaborate ribbons or decorations such as appear on the dinner-table.

As a matter of fact, the tea-table should always present an appearance of unpremeditated simplicity. It must never seem as though it had been especially prepared and planned for the occasion. Candles, dimmed with pale shades, may be on the table when the day is gloomy and dark. In winter, for instance, when the days are shorter, softly-glowing candles aid considerably in the cheerfulness of the afternoon tea. Tea napkins are used instead of those of regular dinner size.

A pretty manner of serving sandwiches or cakes is to have them in silver-rimmed wicker baskets which can be pa.s.sed easily from one guest to another. If the tea is informal, wicker chairs and tables may also be used. This is especially pleasing and appropriate when the tea is served on the porch or in the garden.

DRESS AT TEA TIME

Tea time is always the fashionable time of the day and there is sufficient variety in appropriate materials and style for a woman to find a gown that is more than ordinarily individual and becoming. For an informal tea the hostess may wear a clinging gown of silk but she should not dress very sumptuously for her guests will come simply attired and it is hardly hospitable to be a great deal more elaborately dressed than they. Afternoon frocks of silk, velvet, cloth, etc., or of summer materials are suitable for the guest. When the weather demands it she wears an attractive wrap.

In selecting dresses for teas, and, indeed for all occasions, it is well to remember that the more ornamentation there is the less elegance there will be. The materials should be rich but not showy--the best-dressed person is the one who calls least attention to his or her clothes.

One may wear jewels but not heavy necklaces or glittering brooches or other flashing stones. If the affair is a formal one the hair may be as elaborately marcelled as for the evening. In this case the gown should be a rich creation of the kind suitable only for such events.

If the tea is given for a _debutante_ it may be a very festive occasion and _decollete_ gowns may be worn. Dark colors are rarely worn and the _debutante_ herself should be a fairy dream in a lovely creation of silk, georgette, _crepe-de-chine_, or something else equally girlish and appropriate.

Elderly women wear black lace or satin though certain shades of brown and blue and nearly all shades of gray are irreproachably good taste if--and this "if" is an important one--they are becoming.

THE GARDEN PARTY

Charming indeed is the simple entertainment of the garden party. It is an undebatable fact that informal entertainments are always more enjoyable than those that are strictly formal, and the easy harmony of the garden party is certainly informal to an acceptable degree.

Someone once said of the lawn fete (which is merely another name for a garden party) that "a green lawn, a few trees, a fine day and something to eat" const.i.tute a perfect garden party. To this we add, that the guests must be carefully selected and the grounds must be attractive.

The garden party must be held in the open air; refreshments are served outside and the guests remain outside until they are ready to depart. At Newport, where garden parties are quite the vogue, the invitations are sent weeks in advance, and, if the weather is bad, the party is held indoors. But ordinarily it must be held entirely on the grounds. A large porch is a great advantage, for if there is a sudden downpour of rain, the guests may repair to its shelter.

There are many opportunities for the hostess to show consideration and hospitality at the garden party. Easy chairs arranged in groups or couples under spreading trees always make for comfort. Some hostesses have a tent provided on the lawn for the purpose of serving the refreshments--a custom which earns the approbation of fastidious guests who search the food for imaginary specks of dust when it is served in the open.

RECEIVING THE GUESTS

Invitations to garden parties may be sent ten days to two weeks in advance, and a prompt reply of acceptance or regret is expected. The hostess receives on the lawn--never in the house. The guests, however, drive up to the door of the house, are directed upstairs to deposit their wraps (if they wish they may keep them with them), and then are shown to the part of the grounds where the hostess is receiving. A servant should be in attendance to see that each guest is properly directed, unless the grounds where the hostess is receiving are visible from the house.

After being greeted by the hostess, guests may wander about the grounds, stopping to chat with different groups, and seeking the refreshment table when they are weary. The hostess must be sure that her lawns are faultlessly mowed, and that the tennis courts are in order. Lawn-tennis has had a large share in the making of the garden party's popularity, and the wise hostess will always be sure that her courts are in readiness for those who enjoy the game.

Cold refreshments are usually served at the garden party. Salads, ham and tongue sandwiches, fruits, jellies, ices, cakes, candies and punch are in order. Particular care must be taken in serving the refreshments to avoid any accidents or mussiness. There is nothing more disturbing to both hostess and guest than to have a gla.s.s of punch or a dish of strawberries overturned on a lawn, and pains should be taken to avoid accidents of this kind.

ON THE LAWN

Music is a pleasing feature at the garden party. A pretty custom, now enjoying vogue among the most fashionable, is to have the orchestra hidden by a clump of trees or shrubbery, but near enough to be heard distinctly. In the outdoors music is never too loud to interfere with conversation, and it is always a source of keen enjoyment to the guests.

Also, it adds a solemn charm to the natural beauties of the occasion.

In planning a garden party, it is best to hire all the gla.s.s, silver and china from the caterer, as there is always considerable breakage no matter how careful the servants may be. If the hostess does use her own china and gla.s.sware, she must never use her best unless she is willing to take the risk of having it broken. Undoubtedly, the garden party is troublesome, but it offers possibilities of tremendous enjoyment and amus.e.m.e.nt, and when properly arranged is always a success.

The correct time for a garden party is between three and six in the afternoon. Sometimes it lasts until seven if the day is long and the guests are congenial. It rarely lasts into the evening, however, unless it is in celebration of some special event. Sometimes evening lawn receptions are held, and they are remarkably pretty. An appropriate time to hold an evening garden party is in celebration of a summer wedding anniversary. The grounds are brilliantly lighted with many-hued j.a.panese lanterns or tiny colored electric lights twining in and out among the trees. Benches and chairs are set in groups or pairs underneath the trees. Music is usually on the porch instead of on the grounds. The house is open, and the younger guests may dance if they wish. Supper is served either outdoors or indoors as convenient. Altogether the garden party, whether held in the afternoon or evening, is a picturesque, charming and delightful affair and deserves the wide popularity it is enjoying both in America and England.

DRESS FOR GARDEN PARTIES AND LAWN FESTIVALS

Summer frocks, in their airy flimsiness and gay colors are ideally fitted for the colorful background of a garden or lawn party. And the lady's escort, in his white trousers and dark sack coat adds still further a note of festivity.

For the garden party, the woman wears her prettiest light-colored frock and flower-trimmed hat. Gay parasols may be carried if they match, or harmonize with, the rest of the costume. Light shoes are more attractive than dark ones with light frocks.

A garden party might be compared with a drama, the costumes of the guests deciding whether or not it would be termed pure romance or light comedy. Here, amidst summer flowers, woman's natural beauty is heightened, and the wrong color schemes in dress, the wrong costumes for the setting, jar as badly as a streak of black paint across the hazy canvas of a landscape painting by an impressionist.

WOMAN'S GARDEN COSTUME

Organdie seems to be the material best suited for the garden-party frock. For the younger person there could be no prettier frock for garden or lawn party, or indeed for any outdoor afternoon occasion.

For the older woman, a dress of dotted Swiss, pierette crepe, or French lawn is becoming. The color should be light and attractive, but the style may be as simple as one pleases. Lilac is a pretty color for the older woman, and sunset yellow is becoming both to age and youth alike, when it is appropriately combined with some more somber shade.

There are several color combinations that are very beautiful in lawn and garden settings. We will mention them here, as they might be valuable in selecting frocks for such occasions as mentioned. Violet and orange, both pale and not vivid, offer a delicate harmony of color that is nothing short of exquisite. Old rose and Nile green are equally effective. Orchid, for the person whose complexion can bear it, may be combined with such vivid colors as red, green and blue, presenting a contrast so strong and clear and beautiful that it reminds one of a glorious sunset. Black satin, for the elderly person, is quite festive enough for the garden party when it is combined with a pretty shade of henna or old blue or some other bit of color.

Styles may be simple, but colors must always be gay and rich as the colors from Nature's own palette. And the hat that is broad-brimmed and ma.s.sed with bright flowers, is a fitting complement for such a costume.

THE MAN AT THE GARDEN PARTY

Of course the decorative art of dress has for a long time been entrusted wholly into the hands of woman, but man may be just as attractive on festive occasions, if he follows the rules of correct dress. For him there is less color to be considered, but just as much effect.

The younger man is well-dressed for the garden party when he wears a suit of white flannel or serge with colored or white linen, a bright tie, straw or panama hat, and oxfords of white or black, or a combination of white and black. Loose jackets of black and white striped flannel may also be worn with white duck trousers, if one is young. Then there are the attractive light suits of gray twillett that are so effective when worn with a white waistcoat and bright tie.

For the older man, a jacket of black and white homespun is extremely appropriate. It is smart when worn with a waistcoat of white flannel, white shirt and collar and gayly figured tie of silk foulard. Trousers of white flannel would complete this excellent costume for the elderly man, and with a panama hat that boasts a black band, and black-and-white oxfords he is ready for the most exclusive garden or lawn party.

HOUSE PARTIES

No one should attempt a house party whose home is not comfortably large enough and who is not able to provide every convenience for the guests.

One need not necessarily be a millionaire to hold a successful house party, but it is certainly necessary to have a s.p.a.cious home and sufficient means to make things pleasant for the guests every minute of the time that they are in the house.

While the success of a house party rests directly on the host and hostess, it also depends largely upon the guests themselves. They are expected to contribute to the entertainment. They may be good conversationalists, or witty humorists, or clever in arranging surprises. A man or woman who is jolly, eager to please is always invited to house parties and welcomed by both hostess and guests with equal pleasure and cordiality.

SENDING THE INVITATION

The invitations to house parties are important. While it is complimentary for a guest to be invited to "spend a few days with me next week" he or she will undoubtedly be ill at ease during the visit and fearful of encroaching upon the hospitality of the hostess. It is always more considerate and better form to state the definite duration of the visit, for instance, mentioning that a train leaves the guest's town at eleven-thirty on a certain day, and that another train leaves _for_ that same guest's town, at a certain hour on the day he is to leave. This gives the guest clearly, and without discourtesy, the precise time he is expected to remain at the home of the hostess, and he may remain the full time without any vague premonitions of undesired presence. If the hostess did not state the time of arrival and departure the guest should in her acceptance give suggestive dates leaving them subject to change at the discretion of the hostess. Any other plan is embarra.s.sing to both hostess and guest since neither can make plans for the future until she finds out what the other intends to do.

The usual duration of house party visits are three days--often they last for a week end--although some continue a week or even longer. The lady of the house usually writes a note in the name of her husband and herself both, inviting Mr. and Mrs. Blank to her house for three days or three months as she (the hostess) pleases. A clear explanation as to how to reach the house is given, and also the necessary information regarding trains and schedules.

These invitations must be answered promptly and if for any reason the invited one cannot attend, the reason should be given. If there is any doubt as to how to get to the house of the hostess; questions may be asked in the answer to the invitation, and the hostess must answer them at once.

WHEN THE GUESTS ARRIVE

If the hostess cannot be present to receive her guests, the duty devolves upon the daughter of the house or an intimate friend. As soon as a guest arrives he is shown to his room for after the long railroad trip one is usually dusty, tired and not in the mood for conversation or pleasantries. A bath, a nap, and a cup of coffee or tea, or, if the weather is warm, an iced drink are most welcome.