Bellevue Bullies: Hooked By Love Part 26

She shakes her head. "Don't. Please don't."

"Trying." With a small laugh, I climb off the bed, my feet hitting the ground.

"And I know that you're different, but still, it's hard."

I reach into my drawer, getting a pair of wind pants and a tee. "I get it, I do. But you gotta remember, I'm not that douche canoe, and I'm not your family. I'm amazing, remember?"

She grins as she nods. "Yeah, you don't let me forget that."

"Good, just making sure." I grin before throwing my shirt on. "But all this can wait. I have to go get the girl who holds my heart."

Grinning, she climbs down. But before she can reach the ground, I smack her b.u.t.t, making her squeal. Whipping around, she goes to smack me, but I catch her in my arms, squeezing her to my chest. Looking up at me with those eyes that could seriously carve my heart out of my chest, she says, "I shouldn't be jealous of a kid, right?"

I grin. "You shouldn't be jealous of anyone, but... And I'm just throwing this out there..."

"Lord help me."

I laugh as I squeeze her hard, making her laugh. "But you're really jealous for someone who doesn't want anything more than Javery."

That has her grinning as she scrunches up her nose. Leaning down, she presses her forehead to mine, her eyes searching mine. "Maybe I do want more?"

My brow rises as my heart starts to pick up in speed. Moving my nose along hers, something I tend to do a lot, I don't miss the uncertainty in her voice. "You sound a little unsure there."

She holds my gaze, her eyes full of worry, and that bothers me. Why is she still like that around me? Shouldn't she be completely comfortable with me by now?

"Because I am."

"Way to kill the moment," I say, letting her go despite her protest.

"Don't be like that," she says to my back as I slide my shoes on.

Turning, I reach for her because I have to. I have to touch her, feel her. Am I pathetic? Maybe, but I can't help it. "I just... I just want..."

"Me?"

I nod. "Yeah. All of you."

Looking away, she leans her forehead to my chin. "I hear you. I do."

But does she, really?

Can't say I believe her.

When we get to Lucy's office, I don't miss that Avery really didn't say anything the whole trip into downtown. I think I might have messed up by asking for more than she is able to give, but then, why should I settle? Why should I give my whole self to someone who doesn't want to give themselves to me? It's only fair, I feel. Putting the car in park, I look over at her as she takes her seat belt off.

"Sorry if I p.i.s.sed you off."

She shakes her head, looking up at me with those sinful eyes. "No, you didn't. It's just I feel like I'm letting you down, and I don't like that."

"No-"

"Stop. Don't say I'm not," she says sternly, her eyes burning into mine. "These last two weeks have been f.u.c.king amazing. Really. I've never felt this good in all my life. I'm writing like mad, and, Jace, I love life. That's new, and I know you don't understand that. But really, it's crazy-new for me and I love it. I love waking up in the morning, and I can't wait to see you. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared. I mean, aren't you?"

I shrug as I try to process what she is saying. She's never been happy? How? What did those people do to her? I don't understand it. But as I look into her tormented eyes, I can't help but feel so much for her. I may be scared of what I'm feeling because it's new, but I'm grasping it and I'm ready to act on it. I may be young, but then, so were my brothers. The thing is, and Jayden said this to me once, you can't control what you feel for someone or even when it happens. It just does. And like him, I'm not going to fight it.

I couldn't if I wanted to.

I get that we come from two totally different families. Mine is in my face, and we love with everything inside us. But hers... Just based on the little information I have, I suspect she had to fight for attention. That blows my mind. I never had to fight for attention. My mom loves all of us the same and spoiled us all, especially me. I still think I'm her favorite, though. But I don't think Avery was ever a favorite, and that hurts me. Guts me, because she is simply breathtaking. How could anyone look at her and not instantly want her to be their favorite person in the world?

I have no clue. But it's cool, because she can be my favorite.

Clearing my throat, I say, "No. Why would I be scared?"

"Because this could end."

"You're right, and yeah, that scares me. But I could die tomorrow too. Why should I not enjoy this moment and be thankful for what you give me now? I can't let that hold me back. If I worried so much about the future, I'd talk myself out of everything. I wouldn't push to be the best on the ice. I wouldn't push to be a better person. I would just be stuck, and I can't do that. I have too many plans, and d.a.m.n it, Avery, I want you to be in them."

Pressing her lips together, she shakes her head and my heart drops. Does she not feel the same? s.h.i.t, am I putting myself out there to be rejected? I've never been rejected. I'm Jace f.u.c.king Sinclair!

"You really are amazing, Jace," she whispers, sneaking a peek at me.

Grinning, I nod as I reach out, taking her hand in mine. "I've been told that a few times-mostly by my mom."

Her lips break into a grin as she laces her fingers with mine. "She's right."

"I know, she's the best. Which, by the way, I'd like you to meet her. At my game. Friday."

She pauses, nodding her head as she bites her lip. "I'll be there."

"Really?" I ask, surprised, and she wrinkles her nose.

"Um, yeah. No s.h.i.t, I'm scared to meet your mom and have her hate me since you basically keep that woman on the highest pedestal ever... But yeah, I want to be there. I don't like hockey, but I really like you."

Grinning, I lean into her. "She won't hate you. She loves everyone."

"I hope so." She smiles but then she pauses. "But why did you seem so surprised?"

I shrug, feeling a little dumb. Maybe I'm just freaking out. Probably because she doesn't give me much to work with. "I didn't think you wanted to go 'cause you hate it."

"I have my own issues and demons with hockey, but that's my s.h.i.t to worry about. I want to be there for you. I want to cheer you on and I will."

"It doesn't have to be just your s.h.i.t, though. I can help."

Looking at me, she nods slowly. "I'd like that, but..." She trails off as she leans her head to mine and lets out a long breath. "I'm just scared, Jace."

"Don't be. I won't hurt you." I know I can make that promise. If one thing is for sure, I will never hurt this girl. I can't.

"You just don't get it."

"Then explain it to me."

"I can't." She shakes her head. "You wouldn't understand."

"Try me," I suggest and she shrugs. "I mean, I may look dumb, but I'm pretty quick."

But before she can say anything else, my phone rings.

It's Lucy.

"Oh my G.o.d, can you stop making out with your girlfriend and come in and get your niece? My client is gonna be here in five."

"c.o.c.kblock," I say and hang up, looking over at Avery. "My sister is beckoning me, and if I don't come, she'll cut me."

She smiles. "Okay. But, Jace, I don't think you're dumb. That's not it. I'm just scared."

She goes to get out, but I stop her, my fingers wrapping around her arm and pulling her to me. "Trust and believe, baby. Anything you say to me, I will listen. I may not understand it or get it, but I'll listen and we can figure it out. Just give me the chance, you know? Let me in." She doesn't say anything for a second, her eyes searching mine, and soon, my breath catches. She bites into her bottom lip, and I watch as her eyes darken and then start watering up. Panic fills me quickly and I take my hands off her. "Oh f.u.c.k, why are you crying?"

Laughing, she shakes her head, reaching out to take my hand. "No! I'm not. You're just... You're just really great, Jace."

Letting out a breath of relief, I still watch her, just in case. She's blinking hard, and I can tell she's trying to fight back the tears. I have no clue what her f.u.c.ked-up family and a.s.shole ex did, but s.h.i.t, a certain kind of rage is bubbling inside me. I don't want this girl to hurt; I want her to be happy. With me, preferably. "Tears freak me out."

She closes her eyes with a laugh before looking back at me. "I'm fine. Okay, well, kinda...but not really."

"If you want to talk about it, I'll risk getting shanked to listen."

Giving me a watery smile, she shakes her head. "Maybe soon. But no, let's go."

I smile, leaning into her, kissing her nose. "Look at that, you're communicating."

She smacks my chest before kissing my lips and pulling back with a grin. "Yeah, yeah. Let's go get your niece."

Getting out of my car, I only make it around before I'm attacked by a little body. "Jace!"

Squeezing Angie hard, I give her a loud smacking kiss on the cheek as she hugs me tightly. "Hey, peanut b.u.t.t!"

"I'm so excited I get to hang with you today. I got my hockey stuff!"

I grin. "Cool, I got mine too," I say just as her gaze looks over to where Avery is standing awkwardly by the car. "Hey, Angie, this is my friend, Avery."

"Ooh, both our names start with A's!"

"They do!" Avery says animatedly before holding her hand out. "It's nice to meet you."

"You too," Angie says sweetly as Lucy comes out with Angie's bag in her hand.

Dropping it at my feet, she says, "I'll be done in an hour."

I shrug. "I might bring her back." Leaning over, I kiss Lucy's cheek. "Don't wait up for us, though."

"Okay, I'll be here till five. But cool, thanks again."

"No, thank you. Hey, this is Avery," I say, c.o.c.king my head to Avery, who is rocking back and forth on her heels.

"Ah, yes, the girlfriend," my sister says, holding out her hand. "Nice to meet you."

"You too," Avery says, and it gives me a certain pleasure she doesn't correct my sister. "This is a cool place. Design? Like house interiors?"

Lucy nods as she looks up at the building she has spent the last five years trying to get. It's only an office with all her design s.h.i.t inside, but it's hers and she's happy, which is all that matters. It was her dream to have this place, and if you ask my mom, Lucy basically designs houses for Carrie Underwood.

Lucy only opened it a couple months ago. Before then, she was doing business out of my mom's bonus room, but now she has her own s.p.a.ce. She was even looking into getting a place to live close to it. But my mom helps so much with Angie, it would be hard. Either way, we are all crazy proud of her and what she has accomplished. Coming through a nasty divorce and sharing Angie with her d.i.c.kwad ex, it's easy to say it hasn't been roses for Lucy. But she's prevailed, and I couldn't be prouder of my big sister, even if she is kind of a b.i.t.c.h. We love her anyway.

"Yup, when you get a house, keep me in mind," she says with a wink and Avery smiles.

"Will do."

"Well, I wish I could chat more-"

"No, she doesn't. She hates people," I tease and Lucy holds up one hand to block Angie from seeing she's flipping me off.

"Don't listen to him. He thinks everyone our family loves him when, really, we don't. We just felt bad the wolves didn't want him anymore and took him in."

Avery giggles as I roll my eyes. "Says the person I look the most like."

She shrugs, brushing her long brown hair off her shoulders. "I mean, it isn't my fault you decided to be a boy instead of a girl. It was a big decision for him, he's sorta quiet about it, but we love-"

"Shut up, Luce. Don't listen to her," I say to Avery, grabbing Angie's bag. "She's jealous I'm prettier than her and that my mom loves me the most."

Avery giggles as Lucy scoffs. "Please. She has to love you, being adopted and transgender. Ah, that's rough."

"I hate you," I say, but then I look at Angie when she smacks me. "I really don't. She's being mean."

Angie rolls her eyes, looking every bit her momma. "You love her the most."

"No, I love you the most," I say, kissing her cheek. "Bye, Lucy."

"Bye, Mommy!"

"Bye, y'all," she calls before going back in the building as I put Angie down. Grabbing her booster seat out of Lucy's car, I strap it in before buckling her in. Meanwhile, Avery and Angie are in a long conversation about Angie's sparkly pink shoes.

"They are dope," I say, shutting the door and getting in.

"Fo' sho'," Angie says and I grin over at Avery.

"We're gangsta."

"True dat," Angie adds and I bubble with laughter.

"Oh my, Lucy must love that."