Barks and Purrs Part 6

I don't believe in it moreover. It's the cry of a man, and men cry out for the pleasure of hearing their own voices.

TOBY-DOG, (_calm again_)

I'm hungry. Can't we hope to eat soon, my mistress? I don't know what time it is in this strange country, but it seems to me....

SHE

Come now, we'll all have our luncheon.

(_She takes the things out of the basket, crumples up some tissue paper and breaks a crisp brown roll_.)

TOBY-DOG, (_chewing_)

What She gave me then must have been very good indeed to seem such a tiny bit. It melted in my mouth, there's not even the memory of it left....

KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_chewing_)

Breast of chicken! Purr-rr ... Goodness me! I was purring without knowing it! That won't do. They'll think me resigned to this journey. I must eat slowly, grim, and undeceived, eat for the sole purpose of keeping myself alive ...

SHE, (_to the dog and cat_)

Allow me to have _my_ luncheon now, if you please. _I_ too, like cold chicken and the hearts of lettuce, dipped in salt....

HE, (_anxiously_)

What _shall_ we do to make this cat go into his basket again?

SHE

I don't know. We'll see presently ...

TOBY-DOG

Finished already? I could swallow three times that much. I say Cat, you're eating rather well for a martyr.

KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_fibbing_)

Trouble digs a hole in one's interior. Move away please, I want to sleep now ... if I can. Perhaps a merciful dream will take me back to the house I've left, to the flowered cushion He gave me.... Home! sweet home! Rugs of bright colors for the delight of my eyes, a palm with nice shoots for me to eat, deep arm-chairs, under which I hide my woolen ball as a future surprise for myself--ah, and the cork hanging by a string to the door-latch! the tables covered with bibelots! I thread my way in and out among them and occasionally it amuses me to break some brittle thing. The dining-room is a temple! The vestibule, full of mystery; there unseen, I can watch those who come and go ... Oh narrow back-stairway, where the step of the milkman rings out for me like a morning angelus--farewell! farewell! my destiny carries me on, and who knows if ever ... But this is _too_ sad! All the pretty things I've been saying have really begun to make me feel badly!!

(_He begins a minute and mournful toilet. The train stops. A conductor on the platform cries, "Aw-ll-a-borr-a-borr!!"_)

TOBY-DOG

There it is again! An acci--Oh bother, I've had enough of that!

HE, (_anxiously_)

We're going to change trains in ten minutes. How about the cat? He'll never allow us to shut him up ...

SHE

We'll see ... Suppose we put some meat in his basket?

HE

Or perhaps petting would ...

(_They approach the redoubtable_ KIKI _and both speak together_.)

HE

Kiki, my beautiful Kiki, come jump on my knee, or on my shoulder. You like that as a rule. You'll doze there and then I'll put you gently into the basket. After all, it's open-work and has a comfortable cushion to protect you from the rough wicker. Come, my dear....

SHE

Listen, Kiki. You must learn to act properly and to take life as it is.

You can't stay there like that. We're going to change trains and a horrible guard will appear and say insulting things of you and your race. Besides you'd better obey, because if you don't, I--I'll give you a good whipping.

(_But before she can lift her hand against his sacred fur, Kiki gets up, stretches himself, arches his back, yawns,--to show the rosy lining of his mouth, and then walks to the open basket where he lies down with an admirable air of quiet insolence. He and She exchange eloquent glances_.)

DINNER IS LATE

_A parlor, in the country, at the close of a long summer's day_.

KIKI-THE-DEMURE _and_ TOBY-DOG _doze; ears twitching and eyelids obstinately shut. Now_ KIKI'S _lids part in a narrow slit, and disclose eyes the color of purple grapes. He yawns, with the ferocious expression of a small dragon._

KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_haughtily_)

You're snoring!

TOBY-DOG, (_who was not really asleep_)

I'm not; it's you.

KIKI-THE-DEMURE

Impossible! I don't snore, I purr.

TOBY-DOG

Same thing.

KIKI-THE-DEMURE, (_not condescending to a discussion_)

Thank heaven, it isn't! (_A silence_.)