Ancient Poems, Ballads, and Songs of the Peasantry of England Part 37

Ballad: THE LEATHERN BOTTEL. SOMERSETSHIRE VERSION.

[In Chappell's Popular Music is a much longer version of The Leathern Bottel. The following copy is the one sung at the present time by the country-people in the county of Somerset. It has been communicated to our pages by Mr. Sandys.]

G.o.d above, who rules all things, Monks and abbots, and beggars and kings, The ships that in the sea do swim, The earth, and all that is therein; Not forgetting the old cow's hide, And everything else in the world beside: And I wish his soul in heaven may dwell, Who first invented this leathern bottel!

Oh! what do you say to the gla.s.ses fine?

Oh! they shall have no praise of mine; Suppose a gentleman sends his man To fill them with liquor, as fast as he can, The man he falls, in coming away, And sheds the liquor so fine and gay; But had it been in the leathern bottel, And the stopper been in, 'twould all have been well!

Oh! what do you say to the tankard fine?

Oh! it shall have no praise of mine; Suppose a man and his wife fall out, - And such things happen sometimes, no doubt, - They pull and they haul; in the midst of the fray They shed the liquor so fine and gay; But had it been in the leathern bottel, And the stopper been in, 'twould all have been well!

Now, when this bottel it is worn out, Out of its sides you may cut a clout; This you may hang upon a pin, - 'Twill serve to put odd trifles in; Ink and soap, and candle-ends, For young beginners have need of such friends.

And I wish his soul in heaven may dwell, Who first invented the leathern bottel!

Ballad: THE FARMER'S OLD WIFE. A SUSs.e.x WHISTLING SONG.

[This is a countryman's whistling song, and the only one of the kind which we remember to have heard. It is very ancient, and a great favourite. The farmer's wife has an adventure somewhat resembling the hero's in the burlesque version of Don Giovanni.

The tune is Lilli burlero, and the song is sung as follows:- the first line of each verse is given as a solo; then the tune is continued by a chorus of whistlers, who whistle that portion of the air which in Lilli burlero would be sung to the words, Lilli burlero bullen a la. The songster then proceeds with the tune, and sings the whole of the verse through, after which the strain is resumed and concluded by the whistlers. The effect, when accompanied by the strong whistles of a group of l.u.s.ty countrymen, is very striking, and cannot be adequately conveyed by description.

This song const.i.tutes the 'traditionary verses' upon which Burns founded his Carle of Killyburn Braes.]

There was an old farmer in Suss.e.x did dwell,

[Chorus of whistlers.]

There was an old farmer in Suss.e.x did dwell, And he had a bad wife, as many knew well.

[Chorus of whistlers.]

Then Satan came to the old man at the plough, - 'One of your family I must have now.

'It is not your eldest son that I crave, But it is your old wife, and she I will have.'

'O, welcome! good Satan, with all my heart, I hope you and she will never more part.'

Now Satan has got the old wife on his back, And he lugged her along, like a pedlar's pack.

He trudged away till they came to his hall-gate, Says he, 'Here! take in an old Suss.e.x chap's mate!'

O! then she did kick the young imps about, - Says one to the other, 'Let's try turn her out.'

She spied thirteen imps all dancing in chains, She up with her pattens, and beat out their brains.

She knocked the old Satan against the wall, - 'Let's try turn her out, or she'll murder us all!'

Now he's bundled her up on his back amain, And to her old husband he took her again.

'I have been a tormenter the whole of my life, But I ne'er was tormenter till I met with your wife.'

Ballad: OLD WICHET AND HIS WIFE.

[This song still retains its popularity in the North of England, and, when sung with humour, never fails to elicit roars of laughter. A Scotch version may be found in Herd's Collection, 1769, and also in Cunningham's Songs of England and Scotland, London, 1835. We cannot venture to give an opinion as to which is the original; but the English set is of unquestionable antiquity.

Our copy was obtained from Yorkshire. It has been collated with one printed at the Aldermary press, and preserved in the third volume of the Roxburgh Collection. The tune is peculiar to the song.]

O! I went into the stable, and there for to see, {49} And there I saw three horses stand, by one, by two, and by three; O! I called to my loving wife, and 'Anon, kind sir!' quoth she; 'O! what do these three horses here, without the leave of me?'

'Why, you old fool! blind fool! can't you very well see, These are three milking cows my mother sent to me?'

'Ods bobs! well done! milking cows with saddles on!

The like was never known!'

Old Wichet a cuckold went out, and a cuckold he came home!

O! I went into the kitchen, and there for to see, And there I saw three swords hang, by one, by two, quoth she; O! I called to my loving wife, and 'Anon, kind sir!'

'O! what do these three swords do here, without the leave of me?'

'Why, you old fool! blind fool! can't you very well see, These are three roasting spits my mother sent to me?'

'Ods bobs! well done! roasting spits with scabbards on!

The like was never known!'

Old Wichet a cuckold went out, and a cuckold he came home!

O! I went into the parlour, and there for to see, And there I saw three cloaks hang, by one, by two, and by three; O! I called to my loving wife, and 'Anon, kind sir!' quoth she; 'O! what do these three cloaks do here, without the leave of me?'

'Why, you old fool! blind fool! can't you very well see, These are three mantuas my mother sent to me?'

'Ods bobs! well done! mantuas with capes on!

The like was never known!'

Old Wichet a cuckold went out, and a cuckold he came home!

O! I went into the pantry, and there for to see, And there I saw three pair of boots, {50} by one, by two, and by three; O! I called to my loving wife, and 'Anon, kind sir!' quoth she; 'O! what do these three pair of boots here, without the leave of me?'

'Why, you old fool! blind fool! can't you very well see, These are three pudding-bags my mother sent to me?'

'Ods bobs! well done! pudding-bags with spurs on!

The like was never known!'

Old Wichet a cuckold went out, and a cuckold he came home!

O! I went into the dairy, and there for to see, And there I saw three hats hang, by one, by two, and by three; O! I called to my loving wife, and 'Anon, kind sir!' quoth she; 'Pray what do these three hats here, without the leave of me?'