A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Vi Part 66

WIT.

I dwelt with him.

SIMPLICITY.

Didst thou? now, give me thy hand: I love thee the better.

WILL.

And I, too, sometime.

SIMPLICITY.

You, child! did you dwell with him sometime?

Wit dwelt with him, indeed, as appeared by his rhyme, And served him well; and Will was with him now and then. But, soft, thy name is Wealth: I think in earnest he was little acquainted with thee.

O, it was a fine fellow, as e'er was born: There will never come his like, while the earth can corn.

O pa.s.sing fine Tarlton! I would thou hadst lived yet.

WEALTH.

He might have some, but thou showest small wit.

There is no such fineness in the picture that I see.[242]

SIMPLICITY.

Thou art no Cinque-Port man; thou art not wit-free.

The fineness was within, for without he was plain; But it was the merriest fellow, and had such jests in store That, if thou hadst seen him, thou would'st have laughed thy heart sore.

WEALTH.

Because of thy praise, what's the price of the picture?

SIMPLICITY.

I'll tell thee, my lad. Come hither: if thou wilt be ruled by me, thou shalt pay nothing; I'll give it thee, if thou wilt dwell with me; and, I promise thee, this counsel is for thy prefarmin'.[243] Hadst not thou better serve a freeman of the City, and learn a trade to live another day, than to be a serving-boy in thy youth, and to have no occupation in thine age. I can make thee free, if thou wilt be my prentice.

WEALTH.

Why, Wealth is free everywhere: what need I serve you? My lord is a freeman, if that may do me good.

SIMPLICITY.

I cry you mercy, master boy: then, your master is free of the Lord's Company, and you serve him, that you may be a lord, when you come out of your years.

WIT.

Wealth is a proud boy, gaffer: what say you to me?

SIMPLICITY.

Thy name is Wit: wilt thou dwell with me?

WIT.

If I like your name and science, perchance we'll agree.

SIMPLICITY.

Nay, my name and mine honesty is all one: it is well known. He's a very fool that cannot beguile me, for my name is Simplicity.

WILL.

Goads,[244] gaffer! were you not a mealman once, and dwelt with Lady Conscience?

SIMPLICITY.

Yes, for want of a better.

WILL.

What, a better man?

SIMPLICITY.

No; for want of a better mistress: she was as very a fool as I.

We dwelt so long together, that we went both on begging.

WIT.

Indeed, they that use a good conscience cannot suddenly be rich.

But I'll not dwell with ye: you are too simple a master for me.

WILL.

Nor I'll not dwell with you for all this world's treasure.

SIMPLICITY.

No? Why, whom serve you, Will?

WILL.

I serve my Lord Pleasure.

SIMPLICITY.

And whom serve you, Wit?

WIT.

I serve my Lord Policy.

SIMPLICITY.

And whom serve you, Wealth?

WEALTH.

I serve my Lord Pomp.

SIMPLICITY.

You should be served all with my Lord Birchley, if you were well served.

These lads are so lordly that louts care not for them; for Wealth serves Pomp, Wit serves Policy, and Will serves Pleasure. Wealth, will you buy this picture for your lord?

[_Shew Tarlton's picture_.

WEALTH.

No: it is too base a present for Pomp.

WIT.

And Policy seldom regards such a trifle.

WILL.

Come on, gaffer, come on; I must be your best chapman: I'll buy it for Pleasure. Hold, there is a groat.