A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Vi Part 55

[_Exeunt_.

_Enter_ MERCATORE _reading a letter to himself; and let_ GERONTUS _the Jew follow him, and speak as followeth_.

GERONTUS.

Signor Mercatore, why do you not pay me? think you, I will be mock'd in this sort?

This is three times you have flouted me: it seems you make thereat a sport.

Truly pay me my money, and that even now presently, Or by mighty Mahomet I swear I will forthwith arrest ye.

MERCATORE.

Ha, pray a bare wit me tree or four days: me have much business in hand: Me be troubled with letters, you see here, dat comes from England.

GERONTUS.

Tush, this is not my matter: I have nothing therewith to do.

Pay me my money, or I'll make you, before to your lodging you go.

I have officers stand watching for you, so that you cannot pa.s.s by; Therefore you were best to pay me, or else in prison you shall lie.

MERCATORE.

Arrest me, dou seal knave? marry, do, and if thou dare; Me will not pay de one penny: arrest me, do, me do not care.

Me will be a Turk; me came heder for dat cause: Derefore me care not de so mush as two straws.

GERONTUS.

This is but your words, because you would defeat me: I cannot think you will forsake your faith so lightly.

But seeing you drive me to doubt, I'll try your honesty; Therefore be sure of this, I'll go about it presently.

[_Exit_.

MERCATORE.

Marry, farewell and be hang'd, sitten, scald, drunken Jew.

I warrant ye me shall be able very well to pay you.

My Lady Lucre have sent me here dis letter, Praying me to cosen de Jew for love a her.

Derefore me'll go to get a some Turk apparel, Dat me may cosen de Jew, and end dis quarrel.

[_Exit_.

_Enter three beggars; that is to say_, TOM BEGGAR, WILY WILL, _and_ SIMPLICITY, _singing_.

THE SONG.

_To the wedding, to the wedding, to the wedding go we: To the wedding a-begging, a-begging all three.

Tom Beggar shall brave it, and Wily Will too, Simplicity shall knave it, wherever we go: With l.u.s.tly bravado, take care that care will, To catch it and s.n.a.t.c.h it we have the brave skill.

Our fingers are lime-twigs, and barbers we be, To catch sheets from hedges most pleasant to see: Then to the alewife roundly we set them to sale, And spend the money merrily upon her good ale.

To the wedding, to the wedding, to the wedding go we: To the wedding a-begging, a-begging all three_.

FINIS.

TOM.

Now truly, my masters, of all occupations under the sun, begging is the best; For when a man is weary, then he may lay him down to rest.

Tell me, is it not a lord's life in summer to louse one under a hedge, And then, leaving that game, may go clip and coll his Madge?

Or else may walk to take the wholesome air abroad for his delight, When he may tumble on the gra.s.s, have sweet smells, and see many a pretty sight?

Why, an emperor for all his wealth can have but his pleasure, And surely I would not lose my charter of liberty for all the king's treasure.

WILL.

Shall I tell thee, Tom Beggar, by the faith of a gentleman, this ancient freedom I would not forego, If I might have whole mines of money at my will to bestow.

Then, a man's mind should be troubled to keep that he had; And you know it were not for me: it would make my valiant mind mad.

For now we neither pay Church-money, subsidies, fifteens, scot nor lot: All the payings we pay is to pay the good ale-pot.

SIMPLICITY.

But, fellow beggars, you cosen me, and take away all the best meat, And leave me nothing but brown bread or fin of fish to eat.

When you be at the alehouse, you drink up the strong ale, and give me small beer: You tell me 'tis better than the strong to make me sing clear.

Indeed, you know, with my singing I get twice so much as ye, But, and you serve me so, you shall sing yourselves, and beg alone for me.

TOM.

We stand prating here: come, let us go to the gate.

Ma.s.s, I am greatly afraid we are come somewhat too late.

Good gentle Master Porter, your reward do bestow On a poor lame man, that hath but a pair of legs to go.

WILL.

For the honour of G.o.d, good Master Porter, give somewhat to the blind, That the way to the alehouse in his sleep cannot find.

TOM.

For the good Lord's sake, take compa.s.sion on the poor.

_Enter_ FRAUD, _with a basket of meat on his arm_.

FRAUD.

How now, sirs! you are vengeance hasty: can ye not tarry, But stand bawling so at my lady's door?

Here, take it amongst you; yet 'twere a good alms-deed to give you nothing, Because you were so hasty, and kept such a calling.

TOM.

I beseech ye not so, sir, for we were very hungry: That made us so earnest, but we are sorry we troubled ye.

SIMPLICITY (_aside_).

Look how greedy they be, like dogs that fall a s.n.a.t.c.hing.

You shall see that I shall have the greatest alms, because I said nothing.

Fraud knows me, therefore he'll be my friend; I am sure of that.

They have nothing but lean beef, ye shall see I shall have a piece that is fat.

Master Fraud, you have forgot me: pray ye, let me have my share.

FRAUD.

Faith, all is gone; thou com'st too late: thou seest to all is given there.

By the faith of a gentleman, I have it not: I would I were able to give thee more.

SIMPLICITY.

O sir, I saw your arms hang out of a stable-door.[219]

FRAUD.

Indeed, my arms are at the painter's; belike, lie hung them out to dry.

I pray thee, tell me what they were, if thou canst them descry.