A Nonsense Anthology Part 14

BUZ, QUOTH THE BLUE FLY

Buz, quoth the blue fly, Hum, quoth the bee, Buz and hum they cry, And so do we: In his ear, in his nose, thus, do you see?

He ate the dormouse, else it was he.

_Ben Jonson in "The Masque of Oberon_."

A SONG ON KING WILLIAM III

As I walked by myself, And talked to myself, Myself said unto me, Look to thyself, Take care of thyself, For n.o.body cares for thee.

I answered myself, And said to myself, In the self-same repartee, Look to thyself, Or not look to thyself, The selfsame thing will be.

_Anonymous_.

THERE WAS A MONKEY

There was a monkey climbed up a tree, When he fell down, then down fell he.

There was a crow sat on a stone, When he was gone, then there was none.

There was an old wife did eat an apple, When she had eat two, she had eat a couple.

There was a horse going to the mill, When he went on, he stood not still.

There was a butcher cut his thumb, When it did bleed, then blood did come.

There was a lackey ran a race, When he ran fast, he ran apace.

There was a cobbler clouting shoon, When they were mended, they were done.

There was a chandler making candle, When he them strip, he did them handle.

There was a navy went into Spain, When it returned, it came again.

_Anonymous, 1626_.

THE GUINEA PIG

There was a little Guinea-pig, Who, being little, was not big; He always walked upon his feet, And never fasted when he eat.

When from a place he ran away, He never at that place did stay; And while he ran, as I am told, He ne'er stood still for young or old.

He often squeaked, and sometimes vi'lent, And when he squeaked he ne'er was silent: Though ne'er instructed by a cat, He knew a mouse was not a rat.

One day, as I am certified, He took a whim, and fairly died; And as I'm told by men of sense, He never has been living since!

_Anonymous_.

THREE CHILDREN

Three children sliding on the ice Upon a summer's day, As it fell out they all fell in, The rest they ran away.

Now, had these children been at home, Or sliding on dry ground, Ten thousand pounds to one penny They had not all been drowned.

You parents all that children have, And you too that have none, If you would have them safe abroad Pray keep them safe at home.

_London, 1662_

_IF_

If all the land were apple-pie, And all the sea were ink; And all the trees were bread and cheese, What should we do for drink?

_Anonymous_.

_A RIDDLE_

The man in the wilderness asked of me How many strawberries grew in the sea.

I answered him as I thought good, As many as red herrings grow in the wood.

_Anonymous_.

_THREE JOVIAL HUNTSMEN_

There were three jovial huntsmen, As I have heard them say, And they would go a-hunting All on a summer's day.

All the day they hunted, And nothing could they find But a ship a-sailing, A-sailing with the wind.