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Farwell rose abruptly and left Victoria singularly stirred. He was a personality, she felt; something quite unusual. He was less a man than a figment, for he seemed top heavy almost. He concentrated the hearer's attention so much on his spoken thought that his body pa.s.sed unperceived, receded into the distance.
While Victoria was changing to go, the staff room somehow seemed darker and dirtier than ever. It was seldom swept and never cleaned out. The management had thoughtfully provided nothing but pegs and wooden benches, so as to discourage lounging. Victoria was rather late, so that she found herself alone with Lizzie, the cashier. Lizzie was red-haired, very curly, plump, pink and white. A regular little spark. She was very popular; her green eyes and full curved figure often caused a small block at the desk.
'You look tired,' she said good-naturedly.
'I suppose I am,' said Victoria. 'Aren't you?'
'So so. Don't mind my job.'
'Mm, I suppose it isn't so bad sitting at the desk.'
'No,' said Lizzie, 'pays too.'
'Pays?'
Lizzie flushed and hesitated. Then the desire to boast burst its bonds.
She must tell, she must. It didn't matter after all. A craving for admiration was on her.
'Tell you what,' she whispered. 'I get quite two and a kick a week out of that job.'
Victoria's eyebrows went up.
'You know,' went on Lizzie, 'the boys look at me a bit.' She simpered slightly. 'Well, once one of them gave me half a bar with a bob check.
He was looking at me in the eye, well! that mashed, I can tell you he looked like a boiled fish. Sort of inspiration came over me.' She stopped.
'Well?' asked Victoria, feeling a little nervous.
'Well . . . I . . . I gave him one half crown and three two bob pieces.
Smiled at him. He boned the money quick enough, wanted to touch my hand you see. Never saw it.'
Victoria thought for a moment. 'Then you gave him eight and six instead of nine shillings?'
'You've hit it. Bless you, _he_ never knew. Mashed, I can tell _you_.'
'Then you did him out of sixpence?'
'Right. Comes off once in three. Say "sorry" when I'm caught and smile and it's all right. Never try it twice on the same man.'
'I call that stealing,' said Victoria coldly.
'You can call it what you like,' snarled Lizzie. 'Everything's stealing.
What's business? getting a quid for what costs you a tanner. I'm putting a bit extra on my wages.'
Victoria shrugged her shoulders. She might have argued with Lizzie as she had once argued with Gertie, but the vague truth that lurked in Lizzie's economics had deprived her of argument. Could theft sometimes be something else than theft? Were all things theft? And above all, did the acceptance of a woman's hand as bait justify the hooking of a sixpence?
As Victoria left for home that night she felt restless. She could not go to bed so soon. She walked through the silent city lanes; meeting nothing, save now and then a cat on the prowl, or a policeman trying doors and flashing his bull's eye through the gratings of banks. The crossing at Mansion House was still busy with the procession of omnibuses converging at the feet of the Duke of Wellington. Drays, too heavily loaded, rumbled slowly past towards Liverpool Street. She turned northwards, walked quickly through the desert. At Liverpool Street station she stopped in the blaze of light. A few doors away stood a shouting butcher praying the pa.s.sers-by to buy his pretty meat. Further: a fishmonger's stall, an array of glistening black shapes on white marble, a tobacconist, a jeweller--all aglow with coruscating light. And over all, the blazing light of arc lamps, under which an unending stream of motor cabs, lorries, omnibuses pa.s.sed in kaleidoscopic colours. In the full glare of a lamp post stood a woman, her feet in the gutter. She was short, stunted, dirty and thin of face and body. Round her wretched frame a filthy black coat was tightly b.u.t.toned; her muddy skirt seemed almost falling from her shrunken hips. Crushed on her sallow face, hiding all but a few wisps of hair, was a battered black straw hat. With one arm she carried a child, thin of face too, and golden-haired. On its upper lip a crusted sore gleamed red and brown. In her other hand she held out a tin lid, in which were five boxes of matches.
Victoria looked at the silent watcher and pa.s.sed on. A few minutes later she remembered her and a fearful flood of insight rushed upon her. The child? Then this, this creature had known love? A man had kissed those shrivelled lips. Something like a thrill of disgust ran through her.
That such things as these could love and mate and bear children was unspeakable; the very touch of them was loathsome, their love akin to unnatural vice.
As she walked further into Sh.o.r.editch the impression of horror grew on her. It was not that the lanes and little streets ab.u.t.ting into the High Street were full of terrors when pitch dark, or more sinister still in the pale yellow light of a single gas lamp; the High Street itself, filled with men and women, most of them shabby, some loudly dressed in crude colours, shouting, laughing, jostling one another off the footpath was more terrible, for its joy of life was brutal as the joy of the pugilist who feels his opponent's teeth crunch under his fist.
At a corner, near a public house blazing with lights, a small crowd watched two women who were about to fight. They had not come to blows yet; their duel was purely Homeric. Victoria listened with greedy horror to the terrible recurrence of half a dozen words.
A child squirmed through the crowd, crying, and caught one of the fighters by her skirt.
'Leave go . . . I'll rive the guts out 'o yer.'
With a swing of the body the woman sent the child flying into the gutter. Victoria hurried from the spot. She made towards the West now, between the gin shops, the barrows under their blazing naphtha lamps.
She was afraid, horribly afraid.
Sitting alone in her attic, her hands crossed before her, questions intruded upon her. Why all this pain, this violence, by the side of life's graces? Could it be that one went with the other, indissolubly?
And could it be altered before it was too late, before the earth was flooded, overwhelmed with pain?
She slipped into bed and drew the horsecloth over her ears. The world was best shut out.
CHAPTER XXII
THOMAS FARWELL collected three volumes from his desk, two pamphlets and a banana. It was six o'clock and, the partners having left, he was his own master half an hour earlier than usual.
'You off?' said the junior from the other end of the desk.
'Yes. Half an hour to the good.'
'What's the good of half an hour,' said the youth superciliously.
'No good unless you think it is, like everything else,' said Farwell.
'Besides, I may be run over by half past six.'
'Cheerful as ever,' remarked the junior, bending his head down to the petty cash balance.
Farwell took no notice of him. Ten times a day he cursed himself for wasting words upon this troglodyte. He was a youth long as a day's starvation, with a bulbous forehead, stooping narrow shoulders and narrow lips; his shape resembled that of an old potato. He peered through his gla.s.ses with watery eyes hardly darker than his grey face.
'Good night,' said Farwell curtly.
'Cheer, oh!' said the junior.
Farwell slammed the door behind him. He felt inclined to skip down the stairs, not that anything particularly pleasant had happened but because the bells of St Botolph's were pealing out a chime of freedom. It was six. He had nothing to do. The best thing was to go to Moorgate Street and take the books to Victoria. On second thoughts, no, he would wait.
Six o'clock might still be a busy time.
Farwell walked down the narrow lane from Bishopsgate into St. Botolph's churchyard. It was a dank and dreary evening, dark already. The wind swept over the paths in little whirlwinds. Dejected sparrows sought sc.r.a.ps of food among the ancient graves where office boys munch buns and read of woodcarving and desperate adventure. He sat down on a seat by the side of a shape that slept, and opened one of the books, though it was too dark to read. The shape lifted an eyelid and looked at him.
Farwell turned over the pages listlessly. It was a history of revolutionists. For some reason he hated them to-day, all of them. Jack Cade was a boor, Cromwell a tartuffe, Bolivar a politician, Mazzini a theorist. It would bore Victoria.