Daomu Biji Volume 8 Chapter 23

At dinner that night, Xiuxiu asked me what to do, but I didn't have any sort of plan. Pan Zi had already done everything for me, and all I had to do was make a sign and Leather Bag began to prepare the equipment. Pan Zi must have arranged it before.

Although I was Master Three, I was still far from the point where Pan Zi and Xiao Hua felt a.s.sured that I could make my own decisions.

No matter how big the risk, I had already come this far and accepted it.

Now we can only continue.

According to Fatty, Pan Zi and Xiao Hua won't encounter many problems at first. It's just a matter of whether they can get back to the tunnel, and as long as they can get out, everything will be fine. But if they were trapped in the cave with the gas…

Fatty was able to walk that night, and when I went to the tent to see him again, he was looking at his belly and sighing. I said to him, “If we're to be successful this time, your stomach is very important. I'll send you a pennant and write ‘World's Largest Belly'.”

Fatty said, “Master Three, don't make such sarcastic remarks. With this scar on my stomach, I'll have trouble picking up girls. They'll see it and panic. I have to find a tattoo shop to fix it. What do you say I make it a chess board? In the future, the girl will be able to play chess on my stomach after we do it.”

“I think it's more poetic if you just paint it black and then make a few diamonds and say something about the night sky." I said.

“Good idea Master Three, you're so cultured. I've read less so I'm at a disadvantage.” Fatty said this and looked out of the tent. “None of you told that girl about me, did you?”

“I didn't say you were going back down, but she's very happy to know that you're back. Even if you tell her, though, she doesn't know what we're doing so don't flatter yourself. You're only a few years younger than me, and there's a limit to an old cow eating young gra.s.s.”

We could hear Yunyun outside and Fatty touched the stubble on his face and looked out secretly. “I dig up other people's ancestor's graves, but you say I don't have the b.a.l.l.s to pick up young girls? I'll tell you, I'm really ready for true love this time round. No one can stop it, and no one can make her happier than I can. “

“What happiness can you give her?” I laughed, “Don't you have to go to the vegetable market to cook lard in the future?”

“I have arms.” Fatty said.

I was extremely depressed when I heard him say this, as it brought up all sorts of thoughts about myself. He didn't seem to recognize me at all, and I didn't think about whether to expose my ident.i.ty because I was uncertain about the whole situation and didn't know whether exposure would bring any unexpected changes.

So I quit bantering with him and asked, “Have you recovered?”

“Didn't I sleep for more than ten days?” Fatty said, “A night's sleep would have been fine. I'm a talented person in my prime, and like you, I have suffered a lot so it's nothing to feel tired. And you can't do it without me, so if you want to persuade me to stay, you'd better save it. I'd die of anxiety if I stayed here. You know my temper.”

I nodded, and he said, “There's nothing to fear, but that building is so f.u.c.king weird. Don't be worried about taking things slow since we can't rush in. We'll need to bring as much as we can since we packed light last time and suffered a loss.”

He had already said that, but I nodded anyways, and he pointed to Qiu Dekao's camp on the other side of the lake. When he told me to come closer, I leaned over and he whispered to me: “Master Three, call that Leather Bag boy over here. We have to get some guns from the foreigners and I need his help.”

I said: “I think we shouldn't deal with them, these kinds of people are outlaws.”

“Can't we be outlaws?” Fatty sighed, “This must be what that Xiao Hua kid said. Master Three, don't listen to him, he's an opera singer so of course he doesn't like to fight and kill. Your traditional family has skills and courage, but I don't. I'm telling you, it's all right if you don't have a gun; if you did, I'd have to get another one even if I sold my a.s.s. That's insurance.”

Knowing that many of Fatty's ideas were basically right, I asked him, “What are you going to do?”

Fatty put on his clothes, wiped his face, and said, “Don't worry about it, just call the man over and give me command.”

When I saw Fatty again, he was already wiping his gun. Leather Bag was counting bullets with a b.l.o.o.d.y nose and swollen face, choking as he counted. f.u.c.k, I wondered what on earth he did, but I dared not ask more. I guess Leather Bag was fooled by Fatty's offensive tactics.

I couldn't name the gun I got, but Fatty said it was an Uzi, a miniature submachine gun he nicknamed “Doraemon”. (TN note: main character from a popular j.a.panese kid's show. Think of it as the equivalent of Mickey Mouse).

I weighed it and found that it was very heavy. I had seen this gun before, the one Schwarzenegger's wife used in “True Lies.” I asked, “Why is it called Doraemon?”

“Because when it fired, the muzzle jumped violently, just like Doraemon.”

My heart said, when did Doraemon jump so much? Fatty definitely lived in a different age from us, and I seem to remember a very old Chinese puppet film called “Doraemon,” where the puppets in it really jumped all the time. However, in this case, Fatty himself should have taken the nickname.

After wiping the gun, Fatty pressed the bullets into the magazine and said, “I didn't think they could get this stuff, the black market is really reliable. This thing is the most suitable for close combat, especially for use in a narrow s.p.a.ce. It has great lethality, but it doesn't hold many bullets. “

“Just one?” I asked, and he immediately threw me something. I took it and found it was a very strange pistol that seemed to have been modified.

“Beretta. Italian gun.” Fatty said, “But they seem to have modified it and it's much lighter. What? If you don't like it, you can just use the handle for self-defense.”

I saw that Fatty's seemed to be smiling like he was hiding something, and I couldn't help but feel a little strange. However, I was Master Three and couldn't force him to say it directly like I would as Wu Xie, so I had to give up. I weighed the gun and found it was very light. Fatty tossed me a towel and told me to wrap it up: “Pack it up and don't let anyone see it. They're looking for it.”

I did as he said and realized that just a few years ago, I would have been surprised to see a gun, but now I saw it as an old friend. When I packed the gun away, Fatty snapped the bolt on his Doraemon, untied it, and stuffed it into his bag, saying, “I can sleep well at night.” Then he held the bag in his hand and kissed it.

As I looked into Fatty's eyes when he said this, I found that they were very serious and my heart sank. His att.i.tude of “hiding something” and his resolute look made me uncomfortable.

I only hoped that the information he was hiding was as unreliable and harmless as those before.

I wanted to talk to him about something else, especially the details of his experience in the tunnel, when suddenly I heard a loud bang coming from outside the tent, as if something had exploded. Fatty responded faster than I did, and immediately went out. Everyone around heard it as well and looked in the direction it had come from. We heard a series of gunshots coming from the direction of Qiu Dekao's camp. I looked at Fatty: “Did you do this?”

“Of course not, your fat man steals guns, he doesn't do sneak attacks.”

“Let's go and see!” Leather Bag was very active and had already rushed over.

I looked at the situation over there and gestured to the others to pack their things and take everything we needed into the woods. Then I went with Fatty to check it out.

Before I got there, I felt that it was like a war. There was gunfire everywhere, and the trail of bullets in the night was just like a battlefield.

“What's going on?” Fatty scolded, “It doesn't look like the People's Liberation Army encirclement and suppression tactic.”

Leather Bag said: “Brother w.a.n.g, look, they're not firing the bullets at each other. They're only shooting and not returning fire, it's all aimless.”

“It's not aimless.” Fatty said, “I touched a gun when I was ten years old, and you think I can't even see it clearly? These guns are all hitting something at close range, and whatever it is, it's attacking them over there.”

“What is it?”

“I don't know, it's from the lake.” I said, pointing to the tree where there was a sniper. Now all the bullets were fired into the lake, one at a time.

Fatty pulled on the bolt of his Doraemon and leaned towards the lake. I followed him, and looking at it from afar, the view in front was completely dark and nothing could be seen. At that time, suddenly there were the sounds of screams in our own camp behind us.

We immediately turned back and took three steps forward and one step back when we saw several lynx emerge from the lake near our camp and rush towards the sh.o.r.e.

Fatty raised his gun in an instant and sent a lynx straight back to the lake.

I rushed over and drew a piece of firewood from the bonfire and threw it at the place where Mute Sister and Xiuxiu had cried out.

A lynx was forced back by firewood and I took this chance to lean over and look at its ears. I found that it was the lynx that attacked me when I went to find Father Pan Ma in the mountains with Poker-face and the villagers. Fatty was obviously very handy with “Doraemon” and dropped two of them with a blow each. This kind of gun was really a killer weapon in this kind of battle.

Xiuxiu and Mute Sister were scared to death, clutching at each other, so I brought them behind me while Fatty and Leather Bag gathered around to form a circle. In a flash, two or three more rushed out of the water. Fatty cried out, “Triangle Defense!”

I didn't know what it meant, but I pinned Mute Sister down and fired three shots behind me. I had already experienced this guy's agility before, and missed every single shot as he dodged and almost reached me. I wasn't afraid at this time, and though years of training hadn't improved my marksmanship, my mind was numb and I used my hand to block him.

In a flash, the s.p.a.ce behind me was empty and I saw Mute Sister standing in front of me. My heart was shocked, thinking there was no need for this kind of dog blood (TN: cliché). Fortunately, Fatty grabbed my hand and swung it up, shouting, “Shoot!”

My bullet pa.s.sed under Mute Sister's armpit almost at the exact moment the lynx went for her neck. It flipped back and retreated into the woods upon landing.

I raised my hand to shoot and Fatty pulled the trigger and said, “Amitabha, Master Three.”

Just then, there was a loud noise in the woods and a fire blazed in the sky. I didn't know what had exploded.

<> <><>