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Chapter 93 - Irony
At that point, Evie's eyes were wide with shock and her lips were parted as well. Gavriel was saying all those arousing words to her, while locking his intense s.e.xy eyes on her, making her insides burn and itch with a pa.s.sion that would not be so easily doused.
"And then I would finally take you and finally make you mine completely…" Gavriel added in an erotic and long-suffering tone.
But despite the shock and embarra.s.sment that suffused her face initially, Evie somehow recovered quite quickly this time. Though her eyes were blinking owlishly at Gavriel, her mind still managed to function well enough to follow through with the facts that she held tightly to – which was the matter she was wanting to find out.
"T-then why did you suddenly… jerked away when I kissed you earlier?" her voice got smaller when her question neared the end.
Gavriel stilled and the look in his eyes changed a little. The insane l.u.s.t disappearing.
"I…" Gavriel hesitated and he looked away and settled his gaze to the darkness. "I smelled you and the memory of me drawing on your blood flashed in my mind." his voice was sullen and full of self-reproach.
The confession made the two of them quiet. Evie nibbled the inside of her lips at the realization of her husband's predicament. She did not know what the effect on him was now that he had tasted her blood. She had truly hoped that nothing wrong would come out of it. But all she knew now was that it was not something positive, judging from the way he jerked away from their heated kiss.
"Are you alright?" she asked weakly. "Is it very hard… for you to be this close to me now?" her voice cracked a little even though she tried her best to stay composed and not let him know how crestfallen she was. The thought that she was making him suffer and the thought that she might not be able to get closer to him anymore made her feel a lump forming in her throat. She wanted him too, so bad… so desperately bad… the desperation nearly frightened her. She wanted nothing but him now. And it seemed as if that it was better for her to stay away from him as it would trigger something negative within him. That thought just made her want to run away and hide in one dark corner to cry her heart out. Now that she was ready and willing to meet his advances and seduction, it turns out that he wanted to stay away from her!
She had finally given in at long last, after resisting a losing game for what felt like eternity. Yet now that she finally let him touch her, take her, hold her all he wanted, he was now the one hesitant to touch and hold her because of the fear that he might be tempted to suck her blood again. The irony elicited a bitter smile from Evie, thinking that some mischievous G.o.d was playing with their fates. When he was chasing her previously, she was busy running away. Now it seemed as if she was doing the chasing and he was the one running from her. It was truly the ultimate irony!
Evie already knew that Gavriel would never risk her again and it would be selfish of her to tell him it was alright. Because it was never alright to him. She could see it in his eyes, that he hated himself for sucking her blood – for even biting into her in the first place.
Crestfallen, Evie pulled away from him. She did not know what else she could do. She did not want to cause him any further torment. She knew how anguished he was when he accidentally killed that human girl the last time. Though he did not kill her, drawing so much blood from his own wife must have hurt him inside in ways that she could not possibly understand.
But Gavriel did not allow her to go. He hugged her instead and he drew in a deep breath like he was trying to savor her scent instead of responding to her.
"Evie…" his breath fanned over her skin in an erotic waft, making her shiver slightly in his arms. "Are you not… afraid of me?"
His question made Evie go still in his arms.
"You have seen me…" he paused, his grip on her tightening, as if he was afraid that she would run away, "in my worse state. I'm a monster –"
"No, you're not!" Evie blurted out. She had to make it clear that he understood she did not see him as a monster. That misunderstanding she would not allow.
Gavriel was surprised by her loud and immediate response and he pulled away and looked seriously at her.
"You're not a monster." She repeated, cradling his face in her palms with all the gentleness in the universe. "But even if you are… I won't fear you. Never." She gave him a brilliant and trusting smile after that statement.
His eyes slowly widened with utter shock. Her complete trust in him, her utter confidence in his ability to keep her safe, was so very humbling to him that it could only bring him to his knees.
"No matter who or what you claim you are, you're Gavriel, the man I married… the man who took care of me in this foreign land despite all my indifference, the man who patiently dealt with all my shortcomings…" her eyes emotional. "Yes, you frightened me sometimes but I will never run away from you. Because I…" her lips trembled slightly.
Evie knew she could no longer keep her promise. She surrendered. Because she realized she would not be able to leave him anymore. She did no0t know when did her feelings for him grew to this extent but what happened in the dungeon made Evie realized that she was beyond help right now. She had realized that she was prepared to do anything and everything for him. She was also certain that even if her father would come to get her at this very moment, she could never bring herself to leave Gavriel willingly anymore. Because he was her life now, her heart was already his. How could she live a life without him now? She was already spellbound by him, beyond redemption.
"I… I love you…" she continued as a lone crystalline tear fell from the corner of her eye. "No matter what you are… I love you."