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They were here.
Somehow, I knew it was her family although I'd never seen them before. Her father was a frail, old man who stood with the help of a walker and a benevolence shone in his eyes that ticked me. The woman next to him also looked worn out; her eyes sunken, lips puckered and spine curved as if the whole world weighed upon her shoulders. A loose scarf was wrapped around her head, covering most of her russet-coloured hair and she wore traditional clothes.
Then, there was her little brother. I remembered that age—curious, awed and genuine. When you could be who you were without worrying about other people. After that, your innocence was stolen, chewed and spewed away.
I headed down the corridor towards them and Uncle immediately looked over. He squinted his eyes at me, a wary expression marring his wrinkled face.
I greeted them with a Salaam and they responded in a similar fashion. "I'm Zayn," I said, "Leia's . . . cla.s.s fellow."
Uncle was still pretty suspicious but Aunty started firing questions at me, all of which I answered coolly, trying my best to ease her worry, all the while battling my own.
Even I didn't know how things would progress from now on.
"Ammar didn't come?" I tried to keep my face aloof and I thought I sounded pretty d.a.m.n smooth.
Whether Uncle was surprised I knew about Ammar, he didn't let on. "I've tried calling him; he didn't pick up. I'm sure he must be busy with work."
Work was more important to him than his wife? His son?
I nodded, though, leading them to Leia's room. The hallways reeked of medicine and tears. It was a place of utmost happiness and utter sadness; where life and death merged into one. I tried not to look at anyone's grief-stricken face as I strode to open the door.
I didn't raise my eyes. Couldn't.
I just held the door open for the three of them to pa.s.s. I heard the 'ooh' and 'ah' and my curiosity and interest would eat me alive but I wouldn't look. I let the door shut behind me, taking a seat right outside on the unsterilized, quite unsanitary bench, a safe distance away from a middle-aged man.
And then I started thinking of things to say to Leia. Of how to say them.
Dread curled inside my gut, burning a trail down my abdomen, as I realised I'd have to face my Dad soon enough.