Uncommon Emotions Part 10

A smile met my nerdy declaration. "I'll show you." We headed back to her office where she pulled up an old income statement on her screen. She twisted the monitor so I could see and pointed. "Princ.i.p.al and interest payments on an expansion loan from fifteen years ago. When the location closed, the former CFO mislabeled the payoff as bad debt.

Mistakes like that were why Uncle Archie asked me to join the company. I never thought to question it because we had records for the bad debt."

I leaned forward to examine the statement and automatically reached for the mouse, pulling my hand back when I realized it was on the other side of the desk in Raven's hand. She motioned for me to join her. I walked around, sliding past her chair to grip the mouse. Clicking through each of the financial statements from that year, her explanation made sense but didn't sit right with me. It might have been because the line item had raised a red flag, and I never let them go easily. Normally, when I find a red flag in a company, it turns out to be the size of a tent by the time I've tracked it down.

92*

"Do you have the original loan papers?" I tilted my head and found Raven inches from my face. She'd leaned toward the screen and finding her so close astonished me. Her expression was almost as hard to read as the emotion in her eyes, but I could eliminate repulsion. Neither of us moved right away until my usual aloof professionalism propelled me upright.

The movement caused Raven to blink harshly and stare up at me. "Not on the system, but I'm sure we've got them archived. I'll have Kelly check the file room when she gets back from lunch or call them over from file storage if necessary." She studied my reaction. "What is it?"

"It seems too pat."

"Ockham's razor."

"This may not be the simplest explanation, and it certainly wasn't easy to find, Raven. I've been staring at it for weeks and hadn't thought to look into any retired loans.

Nicely done."

She smiled at my praise. "We'll know for sure when Kelly digs up the loan docs. For now, can I interest you in grabbing some lunch?"

h.e.l.l yes! Then my dispa.s.sionate head prevailed and kept me from immediately accepting her invitation. What if she and her brother had been talking about me? It would be wise to stay away from opportunities where I might send signals that could be misinterpreted. It wouldn't be fair to her, especially since my own feelings were a complete jumble at this point. "I don't think I can get away today, but thanks.

I'm nearly ready to present to your uncles, and I want to go over everything again."

"And again, and again, I bet." She gave me a pointed look. "Okay, maybe once you present we can head back over to Amalia's."

"Sounds good," I said noncommittally.

"I'll get a firm lunch date once you make those presentations." She left no room for argument.

*93 I breathed out a laugh and nodded. "Sure. I liked your brother, by the way."

"He's a good brother, not that I tell him that. Doctors have big enough heads as it is." She eyed my backpedaling and said, "I'll have Kelly bring the papers by when she finds them."

"Great, see ya." I escaped to her call of goodbye.

I needed to focus on getting the work done for this client. Distractions like my friendship with Raven, her possible feelings for me, and my suddenly uncertain s.e.xuality wouldn't help me close out this client. And no way did I have time to ruminate on the dread that filled my gut knowing that she'd been burned by someone. Not to mention the complete lack of time and energy to entertain the surge of delight I felt every time I saw her and the equally enjoyable idea that she might like me in that way.

No, I definitely didn't have the time for thoughts like that.

The voice reached me before Raven did. "Get your coat."

I looked up from my summary report as she walked through the conference room door. "What? Why?"

"Amalia's reopened her student kitchen, one night only."

"What? Why?" The news stunned me into echoing my earlier questions.

"We need to get there before she changes her mind."

Because I couldn't help myself, I repeated, "What?

Why?"

Raven laughed, and I basked in the sound. "Cannoli, spumoni, and tiramisu, need I say more?"

I vaulted out of my seat, sparking another laugh from her. Whipping my jacket off the back of my chair, I practically pushed her out the door. My favorites, and while I hadn't sampled Amalia's recipes, I had no doubt they 94*

would be like one hundred Italian grandmothers had gotten together to perfect the taste.

We drove over in her car, mostly in silence. I realized I hadn't seen her since declining her lunch invitation and hadn't really chatted with her since the basketball game. I also realized that I'd been carrying around an emptiness for days that suddenly seemed full in her presence. I so wasn't emotionally equipped to deal with that realization.

"How many people will be here?" I asked when we exited the car at the restaurant.

"No idea. Last time she taught out of a culinary cla.s.sroom that was much bigger than her kitchen. Twelve people can probably fit in there, but it'll be a tight squeeze."

Giovanni greeted us both with hugs at the door and ushered us into the kitchen. Six others already stood at various counter s.p.a.ces. "Everyone is here, Amalia."

She came over to kiss Raven on the cheek and hug her h.e.l.lo. She turned to me with a sparkling smile and those welcoming arms again. This was almost as good as the chance to learn how to cook like her. When she finished hugging me, she scooted me over to the only open station and smushed me in beside Raven. Guess we'd be working as a team, not that I minded.

For the next couple of hours everyone worked together like we'd been on Amalia's kitchen staff for years. She was that good of a teacher. The aromas of the individual ingredients couldn't compare to that of the finished products. Every student had a personal relationship with Giovanni and Amalia, but none garnered the same affection that they showed Raven. I felt lucky to get some overflow acclaim by standing next to her.

We all had so much fun together I felt like I would be walking away with six new friends. Once we'd packed up our bounty, the other students tossed out goodbyes and promises to report back on their first solo attempt at the recipes. I went back to my works.p.a.ce and gathered up the *95 bowls, utensils, baking dishes and sheets to take them to the dishwashing station. As I was clearing the other counters, I noticed that Raven, Amalia, and Giovanni tracked my actions from the kitchen doorway.

"What?" I reached over to turn on the tap. "I believe I promised I'd clean afterward if this night ever happened, didn't I?"

"No, no, you dear girl," Amalia protested.

Giovanni beamed at both of us and turned to Raven. "Lei e realmente meravigliosa, Raven. Non lasciarla andare."

"I'm only on my best behavior around you, Giovanni," I told him in Italian so that he'd know I was fluent enough to understand his matchmaking attempts. While I liked that he thought I was wonderful and someone she shouldn't let go, I didn't need him planting the altogether pleasing thought in my own head.

"Dio mio! Parli italiano?" he asked of my capacity to understand Italian. He turned back to Raven and ordered her to marry me.

"Giovanni," Raven admonished, nothing teasing about it. The lovely blush of her cheeks tipped her embarra.s.sment at his command. I'm sure if I looked in a mirror, I'd see the same blush appearing on my cheeks.

"I cannot let you do dishes, Joslyn." Amalia stepped in to ease Raven's discomfort, gripping my forearm to get me to stop.

"Getting your hands dirty never hurt anyone, or so my dad always says. Your kitchen staff is gone, Amalia, please let me do this."

"But it is my kitchen."

"Yes, and I'm asking permission to let me earn the tuition for my lesson tonight."

"But I do not charge tonight."

"You should have. I appreciate you sharing your talent with us, so let me do something for you. Take that hunky 96*

husband of yours into the restaurant, put your feet up, and I'll have this place spic and span in no time."

"We will have this place spotless in no time," Raven interjected, moving forward to take a position at the sink with me.

"Such wonderful girls." Amalia let Giovanni pull her out of the kitchen with a grateful wink at us.

"Thank you for this," Raven said.

"You're welcome." I hadn't realized until Raven spoke that our entire conversation with Amalia and Giovanni had taken place in Italian. Guess I didn't have to worry about my Italian being rusty now that I hardly spent any time on my dad's construction sites with his mostly Italian crew.

An hour later, Raven pulled her car into the Paul Industries parking lot. Mine was the only vehicle left, so she didn't need to ask where I was parked. "Ahh, modern," she teased of my Lexus.

"Boring but functional and an automatic."

"Is your ankle still bothering you?" She couldn't hide the worry from her tone.

"No, but automatics are much easier with all the traffic around here."

We got out to load my share of the desserts into the back seat of my car. The process took a couple of trips, and we only b.u.mped into each other once. When I surfaced from my last drop off of takeout boxes, Raven stood a foot away.

The look in her eyes halted my sidestep.

She held my coat but made no move to give it to me. Her gaze didn't shutter the emotions this time. She took a step closer before glancing at my mouth. When her eyes returned to mine, I knew without doubt that she wanted to kiss me.

This was so different from the men who'd dropped me off after a date in the past. They would look at me with determination. They were going to kiss me. Nothing in their gazes could be mistaken for this kind of wanting. No, the men let me know what they were going to do. This, this look *97 was of a desire to kiss, a craving to kiss, a near Victorian yearning to kiss me. I felt my breath desert me as suddenly as when I'd fallen off her horse.

Unlike with the men on similar occasions, my heart thumped erratically and something of a ruckus roared through my ears. I felt hot and cold and trapped and free all at the same time. Never once had I experienced this strong of a reaction to anyone. Desire had always been an elusive emotion for me. If I were being totally honest, I'd have to admit that I'd never felt it. Until now.

I wanted this. I wanted her to kiss me like I've never wanted anything in my life. Not because I wanted another woman to kiss me for comparison. No, I wanted this woman to kiss me. This incredibly smart, s.e.xy woman.

I should do something. Give her a signal to tell her that she could turn her desire into action. If I looked down at her lips, maybe that would be enough of an invitation. Instead, I stared at those eyes, feeling her breath barely touch my face from her spot inches away. Why couldn't I move my eyes from hers? Give her the simple go ahead, or better yet, tip my head forward and capture those sensuous lips to taste what I knew could become addictive? Perhaps it was my stupid sensibility stopping me; or maybe my concern for her that if we kissed and I felt nothing, as per usual, I'd hurt her desperately. G.o.d, I hate being sensible almost as much as I hate being emotionally bereft.

Before I could break the spell and reach for my jacket, Raven stepped back as suddenly as if she'd been yanked by some unseen force. She shook her head and offered my coat, not meeting my eyes. When I took the garment, she waved and hurried around to the driver's side of her car.

"Goodnight, Raven," I called out weakly as the door was closing. Her tires didn't exactly squeal as they left the parking lot, but the escape was no less dramatic.

Chapter 13.

T he rumblings started before I made it up to the front of the large conference room. Now, these people really hated me. I didn't need to be able to read their minds to know that they wanted me to spontaneously combust right before their eyes. Not that I could blame them. This department had every reason to hate me.

Normally, I only present to the executive committee and board of directors, but since it was a family business, Archie didn't want to be the one to present the changes to the staff.

He'd extended my contract to present the changes and oversee the implementations of the changes.

Today was my last presentation with the sales department. Zina had taken the seat directly to my right, and for that, I wanted to hug her. I faced the angry mob of salespeople. Robert looked both p.i.s.sed and bothered, not an easy look to pull off.

"Good afternoon, everyone. I've been asked to present the accepted changes that I've recommended based on my a.n.a.lysis of your department." The crowd groaned at my announcement. Oh yeah, I really had no chance of being voted most popular after this meeting.

"Corporate-wide changes will be released in the new employee handbook next week." I held up the printer mockup of the handbook I'd worked on with human *99 resources and legal. "The first page is an acceptance and agreement form. You'll have one week to read through the new handbook, sign and date the form, then return it to HR.

Your next paycheck won't be released until you do."

"You can't do that!" Robert growled from the back of the room.

"This is the easiest change to comply with, Robert." I offered a bland look, hoping he'd get the hint that something this trivial wasn't worth his ire. "The sales department will have its own policy and procedures manual with the same acceptance form requirement." I held up a copy of their smaller bound book and turned on the projector.

Flipping through the slides of my sales presentation, I outlined and explained all the changes to their department.

By the last slide, I'd barely heard any arguments. In fact, most seemed thrilled that their achievements would be recognized and doc.u.mented without the threat of being embarra.s.sed by less than stellar individual performances.

"Finally, you'll be moving to a per diem expense accounting basis for sales calls. All travel arrangements will be made by your sales admin a.s.sistants who have been briefed on the new spending parameters. Overnight stays are limited to trips that take you two hours away from the office. Your per diem allotment includes three meals and is only in play on sales calls that qualify as overnight stays."

"What?!" several sales reps yelled out.

"Local trips don't qualify for per diem."

"You can't take away our lunches and dinners,"

someone exclaimed from the left side of the room.

"Yeah, screw that!" another person yelled from the back.

"What about our local clients?" Janice, the woman who'd sat closest to me while I'd been with sales, asked.

"Entertaining a client at a restaurant can still be expensed, locally or otherwise. However, you won't be 100*

reimbursed for meals that you take on your own while visiting a client within the 120 mile radius."

"That's unfair for those of us with mostly local clients."

This whine came from Peter, who'd whined daily about all sorts of things while I tried to work in the cubicle opposite him.

"Then I would suggest you speak with your manager about extending your territory," I retorted. They could go to lunch on their own dimes and whine about the unfairness then.

"What the h.e.l.l, Robert? You just gonna stand there and let her take away our perks?" Peter prodded.

"I'm talking to dad about this, but he seems to think we need some changes. Don't worry, I'll have this one rescinded."

"You shouldn't make promises to your staff that you can't keep." I risked that my speaking out against him would anger him further, but I knew Archie wouldn't change his mind about this.

"I think I know my dad and my staff better than you, Joslyn." The way he said my name made me shudder from the laced hatred.