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I must make good at this job, and save ... my grandmother, who had sent me money the previous year, I must not call on her again. And I did not count on my father ... for he was strenuously in the saddle to a gra.s.s widow, the one who had lured him to change boarding houses, and she was devouring his meagre substance like the Scriptural locust.
That first breakfast was a nightmare. I "practised breakfast" from three o'clock till six ... by six I had started another breakfast, and by seven, after having spoiled and burned much food, I was tolerably ready for customers ... who seemed, at that hour, to storm the place.
It is not necessary to go into detail. In three days I was through. And I had my first fight with Barton.
I was back in my army tent once more, free, with my Sh.e.l.ley, my Keats, my ma.n.u.script....
In despair of ever returning to Hebron, once more I lay under starry nights, dreaming poetry and comparing myself to all the Great Dead....
With the top of the tent pulled back to let the stars in, I lay beneath the gigantic, marching constellations overhead--under my mosquito netting--and wrote poems under stress of great inspiration ... at times it seemed that Sh.e.l.ley was with me in my tent--a slight, grey form ...
and little, valiant, stocky Keats, too.
After my quarrel with Barton, he tried to oust me from that desirable site the Bishop's wife had turned over to me ... indeed, he tried to persuade me to leave the colony. But I would not stir.
There was a young fellow in the "City" named Vinton.... Vinton was the strong man of the place. He spent three hours every morning exercising, in minute detail, every muscle of his body ... and he had developed beautiful muscles, each one of which stood out, like a turn in a rope, of itself.
Vinton was sent to oust me, by force if need be.
I really was afraid of him when he strode up to me, as I lay there reading the _Revolt of Islam_ again.
With a big voice he began to hint, mysteriously, that it would be wise for me to clear out. I showed him that I held a clear t.i.tle and right to sojourn there till Christmas, if I chose to, as the bishop's wife had paid for the site till that time, and had then transferred the use of the location to me. I showed him her letter ... with the Tallaha.s.see postmark.
His only answer was, that he knew nothing about that ... that Barton wanted the place, and, that if I wouldn't vacate peaceably--and he looked me in the eyes like some great, calm animal.
Though my heart was pounding painfully, against, it seemed, the very roof of my mouth, I compelled my eyes not to waver, but to look fiercely into his....
"Are you going to start packing?"
"No, I am not going to start packing."
"I can break your neck with one twist," and he ill.u.s.trated that feat with a turn of one large hand in the air.
He came slowly in, head down, as if to pick me up and throw me down.
I waited till he was close, then gave him an upward rip with all my might, a blow on the forehead that made the blood flow, and staggered him with consternation. To keep myself still at white heat, I showered blows on him. To my surprise, he fell back.
"Wait--wait," he protested in a small voice, "I--I was just fooling."
After Vinton left, my blood still pouring through my veins in a triumphant glow, I sat on the ground by the side of my tent-floor and composed a poem....
That afternoon Barton's office boy was sent to me, as an emissary of peace.
"The boss wants to see you in his office."
"Tell your boss that my office is down here. If he wants to see me he can come here."
The boy scurried away. I was now looked upon as a desperate man.
And I was happy. I sang at the top of my voice, an old ballad about Captain John Smith, so that Barton could hear it through the open window of his office....
"And the little papooses dig holes in the sand ...
_Vive le Capitaine John!_..."
I leaped into the lake, without even my gee-string on, and swam far out, singing....
Late that evening, Barton came to my tent ... very gently and sweetly ... he no longer called me John or Johnnie ... I was now Mr. Gregory. He asked me, if he rented the plot back from me, would I go in peace? I replied, no, I meant to stay there till the middle of September, when the fall term opened at Mt. Hebron.
Then he asked me, would I just join forces with him,--since we must put the movement above personalities....
We had a long talk about life and "Nature" ideals. The man showed all his soul, all his struggles, to me. And I saw his real greatness and was moved greatly. And I informed him I would antagonise him no longer, that, though I would not give up the desirable site, otherwise, I would help him all I could.
Then he said he would be glad to have me stay, and we shook hands warmly, the moisture of feeling shining in our eyes.
As the time for my return to school drew near, I was in fine physical condition, better than ever before in my life. I was still somewhat thin, but now it could be called slenderness, not thinness. And I was surprised at the laughing, healthy, sun-browned look of my face.
I felt a confidence in myself I had never known before....
I had a flirtation with a pretty, freckle-faced girl. She worked in Barton's "factory," and she used to come down to my tent where I sat reading, with only my trunks on,--during the noon hour,--and ask me to read poetry aloud to her. And I read Sh.e.l.ley. She would draw shyly closer to me, sending me into a visible tremour that made me ashamed of myself.
At times, as we read, her fair, fine hair would brush my cheek and send a shiver of fire through me. But I still knew nothing about women. I never even offered to kiss her.
But when she was away from me, at night specially, I would go into long, luxurious, amorous imaginations over her and the possession of her, and I would dream of loving her, and of having a little cottage and children....
But words and elegant, burning phrases are never enough for a woman.
In a week I noticed her going by on the arm of a mill-hand.
And, broke again, I wrote to my grandmother that I must have fifty dollars to get back to school on. And, somehow, she sc.r.a.ped it together and sent it to me. My first impulse was to be ashamed of myself and start to return it. Then I kept it. For, after all, it was for poetry's sake.