Torn: Crushed Part 5

Maybe one day, I would find my own fated person to be with. For the meantime, I would bask in the joyous reunion with my friends because who knew when we all would be together again?

Once confined in the bedroom, I sighed as I plucked my pumps off each foot before I heard a short rap at the door.

"Coming!" I yelled across the room before I strode towards it, opening it with mild abandon. "Hey, you, what's up?"

Carter beamed, still dressed in his casual attire with his dress shirt unb.u.t.toned from the top with pushed back sleeves. He looked scruffy and s.e.xy, all in one hot, steaming package.

"Hey, Linds mentioned that you're heading back home soon. When do you think you're planning to go?" He gave me an intent look.

"Tomorrow." Stepping aside to let him inside the room, I sighed before responding to him. "You?"

"The day after," he instantly replied just as I was shutting the door behind him.

I immediately went towards the small, cozy settee across the room that sat next to a little balcony.

Carter followed before taking the opposite white-patterned, wingback chair across from me.

"Well, I was thinking, why don't I fly out with you?" he asked before I even had the chance to get comfortable in my chair.

I paused, frowning at him. "You sure? Wouldn't that be too weird?"

"How so?" He shrugged before glancing towards the floor. "I really don't want to hang around out here with Emma. I know Trista's going to be here, as well, but you know, her boyfriend is Ba.s.s's best friend, and with you gone, I won't have anyone around who's kind of neutral and not on his side."

He meant Ba.s.s. I hadn't realized he was that uncomfortable. Now I felt bad for him. If given a choice, I doubted he would have stayed for this long had it not been for Lindsey begging him to hang around. Their aunt and uncle had already left earlier that morning since those two were busy with their businesses.

"I don't know. I suppose, if you're okay with it, then I am, too, I guess."

Carter beamed. "At least you won't have to sit next to some random fat dude with a flatulence problem. Instead, you get to sit next to me. Lucky you." He winked at me, laughing.

I bunched up my nose, chuckling with him. "G.o.d, you better not be farting, Carter, or I'm going to make the long flight a living h.e.l.l for you."

Sharing this moment with him, it showed me how I missed this Carter-the fun, happy-go-lucky one and not the brooding, dark, and mysterious one he had been.

I truly hoped that someday he would find someone who could love him and whom he could love back the way he had Emma. Some people might argue that finding that sort of love twice in one lifetime would be difficult, but I was completely optimistic. Surely he couldn't be stuck loving one woman for the rest of his life? That would seriously be cruel. Besides, the same thing applied to me-if I had to love Brody for the rest of my life, then I was f.u.c.ked.

Thank goodness I was still optimistic about the future. I was single after all. So what if I had to kiss more frogs than intended before finding my prince? The only goal was to keep going and too keep looking.

I admitted, I was ready to really try this time, to spread my wings and try to be available to men-all but one. I wouldn't run back to Brody whenever it was convenient for him. I was done with that.

Chapter Eight.

We boarded an early flight from Athens to London, and then, from London, we got onto a straight flight all the way to Los Angeles. Sleepy goodbyes were exchanged before we left Athens after a party that went on until the wee hours of the morning. We were so exhausted I was absolutely tempted to move the flight, but Carter was adamant we keep the original schedule, because heck, he couldn't wait to jet out of there as soon as possible.

Giving in to his request since I felt bad for the guy, we ended up sticking to our original flight, and I ended up sleeping all four hours away. With the alcohol still running through my body, I was lethargic and wanted to simply doze off, so I didn't pay much attention to him.

The same thing happened when we changed planes. I was a walking zombie, sporting gla.s.ses inside the terminal as he guided me. It was like leading a blind person, but it was his price to pay for making me take the earlier flights, knowing I was still hungover.

I supposed the only consolation was that Carter was actually rather patient, making fun of me as we went yet never uttering a complaint about me. It was probably because he had a little sister and was used to all women's antics. It was pretty much old news to him.

The second I got onto the plane and buckled my seatbelt, I didn't even waste a breath waiting for him to finish putting his carry-on away in the above compartment before I was out like a light.

I thought it was about six hours into the flight, somewhere across the Atlantic Ocean, when I sparked back to life, peeking out of my closed lids to find Carter Mason reading a d.a.m.n novel.

"Uh, since when did you start reading?" I asked awkwardly then yawned as he threw me an amused look.

"Let's see, I think it was when I learned how to read my name after learning my ABCs."

"Don't be stupid," I groaned, laughing with him. "I meant, you know"-I pointed out the obvious paperback he was holding-"that."

He closed his book, showing me the front cover with the bold t.i.tle emblazoned on it: Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk.

"d.a.m.n, Amber, I don't know if I should be insulted or take that as a minor compliment." He arched his perfect-looking, dark brow at me.

My frown deepened, my sleepiness gone for the meantime as I scrutinized him further. "For a guy, your eyebrow is too perfectly defined. Do you do anything with that 'cause I gotta know? My brow game doesn't come close to yours."

He looked like he had tasted something sour. "Brow game? What the f.u.c.k is a brow game?"

It was a good, hilarious moment, and I couldn't stop myself from cackling really hard. Sometimes men were just so clueless it was funny.

Rolling my eyes at him, I scanned the aisles before redirecting my gaze back to him. "Please don't tell me I missed out on lunch?" I was silently praying it wasn't the case.

His lips pressed together before nodding. "You didn't."

"You're lying."

"You did ask me to"-he gave me a pointed look, unperturbed-"so don't give me the crazy eyes."

Pouting, I could feel my tummy growl a little. "But I'm hungry," I moaned in protest, hoping the airplane crew would be kind enough to give me one if there was any left. "Should I press the call b.u.t.ton just to ask if it's possible?"

Carter sighed, tucking his book on the side of his chair, before giving me an amused look that was becoming too familiar to me. "You owe me one, woman," he declared before unbuckling his seatbelt. "I'm going to see if I can charm my way into getting a tray full of food just so I don't have to deal with your cranky a.s.s all the way to LA."

I made my silent mini clap, beyond gleeful. "Thank you, thank you, Carter."

Watching him get up out of his seat, I didn't even doubt for a second that he would be able to charm a stewardess for a lunch tray. Hey, he was Carter Mason after all. He could charm a snake to dance if he so wished it. He was that f.u.c.king hot, if I did admit it myself.

It much over five minutes until, just as predicted, he was back with the mini, plastic tray with my hot lunch on it.

"Ah, you're my savior," I gushed before I enthusiastically grabbed the tray from him and immediately got down to business.

While I got busy munching my heart out, Carter went back to his reading. Quietly reflecting all by my lonesome, I realized he wasn't such a bad companion. In fact, he was actually fun to be around. He and Brody were sort of similar in a sense, though Brody was a bit too frank and too open with me. Unlike him, Carter, though fun, still exercised some reservation.

It wasn't until I made a satisfying sound as I finished eating that Carter finally paid some attention to me.

"You do realize you demolished all of that in five minutes tops, right?"

"Get the f.u.c.k out! No way-"

"Yes, way."

"d.a.m.n. Don't judge. I really was starving," I snorted out, laughing at myself.

We joked around for another ten minutes at my expense before things shifted to stories involving his best friend. Then, since his name was already out in the open, I couldn't help but press more about him.

"He's pretty torn up about Lindsey getting married, huh?"

"He's coping," he said before appearing to be reflective. "It's not easy to be the one left behind," he added with a hint of melancholy in his voice. It wasn't a hard guess where his thoughts were leading.

Imagining Brody's heartbreak and what kind of state he was in was hurting me. I remembered it all too clearly when Lindsey had broken up with him and immediately gone back to be with Dimitris. He was so devastated practically the only thing he consumed was alcohol because he couldn't stomach the thought of digesting food.

"I wish..." I whispered, feeling helpless and blue as I pictured him in a much worsened state. "I just wish it could've been him instead of Dimitris." Had he been happy, I would be happy along with him. Anything, really, as long as I didn't have to see him so broken and out of sorts, but the inevitable had happened. I hoped he was dealing with it without getting himself in trouble.

"That's surprising coming from you. You know, given how you feel about him."

I would rather hurt seeing him happy than be in agony because I couldn't help cure his heartache. It was selfless to love someone whom I had never had a romantic relationship with, yet I was. I had loved him since the beginning of time, and I supposed a part of me always would.

"What can I say, I just want him happy. I'd rather see him happy with her than be miserable forever."

Carter sighed before reaching out to squeeze my arm. "You're a good girl, Amber. Maybe if you give him time, he'll come around to your way." He wasn't teasing; he truly meant it.

"I won't hold my breath."

He smirked. "It's like that, huh?"

I made a determined nod. "It sure is. Maybe it's high time I let it go, let him go."

He seemed to understand the newfound purpose I had. "We all have to start somewhere."

I had come to a point of no return. I couldn't keep wishing he would see me as a woman who also needed to be loved. For years, I was merely a shadow behind Lindsey. However, after seeing her completely happy and fully satisfied with her life, I realized maybe it was my time to truly fight to start living again and not be so easily swayed into thinking I could keep loving the very same man for the rest of my life, one who barely saw me as the woman he told his pains and secrets to or occasionally slept with. Those particular times, he was mostly drunk out of his mind.

No, I deserved better.

I was done chasing shadows. It was high time I lived in the moment, captured it, embraced it with open arms. I was young and quite desirable, so why did I find the need to keep wasting my time with a man who only saw me as a spare, a side chick, or someone to drunk dial because he needed someone to sleep next to?

Brody would only treat me the way I allowed him to, and it was high time I cut that s.h.i.t out. I was done being his go-to everything except the main thing.

Chapter Nine.

Coming back home was bittersweet since our place was merely five minutes away from Carter's, where Brody also lived. My short-lived bravado was being stretched and tested to its limits.

Alone in the house without Trista or any of the girls to distract myself, my feet were itching to trek towards the boys' crib to entertain myself. Not with him in particular, but just to be surrounded by noise and people.

Taking my phone out, I decided to give him a call. Not Brody, no. Carter. Thankfully, he picked up after a few rings.

"It's only been an hour since I saw you. I can't believe you miss me already."

"Ha, ha, glad you find me so amusing," I said as I looked around, feeling restless. "Well, I was wondering if you were tired, 'cause if you aren't, I was hoping we could go somewhere to grab a bite? I know this is weird, and I also know we're back home and don't usually do one-on-one and s.h.i.t, but feel a little bad for me. I'm home alone, and I f.u.c.king hate it."

"Trista won't be home for another two weeks. Do you expect me to eat with you every day?" he asked in a no-nonsense, straightforward voice.

Considering what he had just said about Trista not coming home for another two weeks, I wondered how I was going to survive.

"Well, would it bother you if you did?" I retorted, maybe a little hopeful.

Carter cackled on the other end, making me groan in protest. "Amber, as much as I enjoy being around you, eating with you every day for the next two weeks would be overkill."

"Well, d.a.m.n, say it how it is, then." I admitted I was a little hurt. Why was he being so mean all of a sudden?

"Hey, don't take it that way." His voice quickly mellowed out, erasing any trace of mockery. "Listen, why don't you move in for a bit? As long as you promise to cook and feed us, I'd be more than happy to take you in."

Wait, what the what?

"Uh... Are you f.u.c.king with me right now? 'Cause I'm hungry, and I promise you, now's not the time to f.u.c.k around, Carter."

"No, I'm being serious. Besides, I don't want to worry about you being all alone in that big house. It's summer, anyway, so my house is where it's at."

I was rendered speechless. It was a total WTF moment for me. Where did I even begin? How could I even comprehend? Like, seriously.

"Pfft. I don't know what to say..."

"I'm going to jump in the shower. I'll swing by your place in like fifteen or twenty minutes. Sound good to you?"

"Wait, let me think about this. I need a moment. Maybe even a day-"

"No, you don't," he interrupted with a commanding voice. "Trust me, this will be good for you." With that, he rudely hung up on me while I remained frozen atop my bed, wondering what in the world had just happened.

Was he right? Or was he out of his d.a.m.n mind? How could he even fathom suggesting I live with him, Cooper, and Brody of all people? It was going to be chaotic. If things were different, I would most likely jump at the chance of living with and cooking for them, but f.u.c.k, seeing Brody in a domestic setting? Just as Carter had said, it would be overkill.

I was pondering so hard I somehow didn't realize the time had pa.s.sed until I heard movement outside my door before it was drastically opened by an eager-faced Carter Mason.

With his hair still wet from his shower, typical cargo shorts on along with flip-flops and his wife-beater shirt, he was the poster boy of So-Cal surfer dudes.

"If you don't have any essentials left to pack, I'll just take your luggage from downstairs. Is that cool?"

I hadn't even changed from my long flight. My hair still had some of the icing Trista had been feeding me from dessert when she was too drunk to realize where my mouth was located. I mean, I was a complete mess, and he simply expected me to just hop on board, looking like a slimy rat, and move in the same house as Brody?

"Did you tell Cooper or Brody about this? I mean, do they even agree with you?"